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The brotherhood of stripper enthusiasts

JohnSmith69

layin low but staying high

I believe that a love of strippers is a unifying characteristic of mankind that has the potential to bridge otherwise insurmountable social differences. A case in point.

The DS wants to go to a nail salon. She is the only woman on earth who could get me to try anal sex, take Molly, or go to a nail salon. She goes to get her fingernails done, and apparently I'm having a "pedicure." So I'm sitting in the pedicure chair ( it's kinda like a dentist's chair but for your feet), and the Asian lady is doing her thing. Just as she starts, a big black guy comes in and is seated next to me. Not to be judgmental or anything, but he was pretty clearly a drug dealer. You know how you look at Stephen Hawking and think "that guy must be a theoretical physicist." Well, if you saw this guy you'd think, "that guy must be a drug dealer." I look over at the DS, wondering if she knows the guy and will be making a purchase. But she shows no sign of recognition.

This guy and I couldn't be more different. I'm a somewhat older, conservative white businessman, and he's a young black guy with all sorts of tats, chains, and thug attire. So it seems we are from different worlds. But then I see his girlfriend.

I would bet anybody $10 million that she is a stripper. In the first place, she is dressed like she just walked off stage, right down to the stripper shoes. And she's got more tats than I can count. But just so there's no doubt, she is walking around the place with a large stack of $1s, handing $5-10 to everybody who works there. Kinda like a modern day stripper version of robin hood.

After I notice her. my seat mate and I share a knowing glance at one another. Yes bro you are a playa, and you're stripper is kinda cute. Things remain this way while we get our pedicures. But 15-20 min later, just before I'm done, the DS walks up to show me her freshly painted nails. This is the first time I've ever chosen the color of a woman's nail polish, and I did a good job.

The next thing that happens is a little out of the ordinary, but I know she won't mind. I motion to her to bring her face down to mine so I can whisper something to her. I tell her that she is the single most gorgeous woman I've ever seen in my whole life, and I kiss real big on the lips. She comes up smiling.

I look over at my competition. He has trouble at first taking his eyes off the DS. He is mentally undressing her which is not hard to do. I chose her outfit, and she's not wearing a bra a at my request. Apparently he also likes white girls. Then he looks over at me. He looks from her to me, clearly thinking "WTF?" He is having trouble figuring out how it's possible but the nerdy white guy is a playa too.

He calls his bitch over, and he kisses her just like I did the DS. Ok. We're each happy with our choices. Life is good.

He gets done a minute before me cause my girl was interrupted for some kind of drama in Korean that I didn't understand. When I get to the cash register he hands the girl three $50s to pay their bill. So I pull two $100 bills out of my wallet and lay them on the counter to pay our bill. Yes bro, drug dealing is not the only job that pays good money.

They left and we never spoke a word. Just looked at each other and shrugged in a knowing way. That was enough communication to say it all. Despite all of our differences, we are united in the brotherhood of stripper lovers. Despite all of our differences, this afternoon we are exactly the same -- taking our young things out to get their nails done. So they can work that pole. So they can make that money. And then we both get to take them home when their shift is over.

If I was a musician I'd write a rap song about this incident.