Obligatory dances ?

It's your money. I don't think anyone is required to get dances. If I see a dancer I know I'm not interested in getting from hanging around longer than a few minutes, I'll just tell her I'm not interested in getting dances or waiting on someone rather than waste her time. Now if she wants to continue to hang around after that, it's up to her.

In my early clubbing days, when a dancer would talk to me for a hour or so, I would feel obligated to get dances with her because she sat with me for so long.

I believe in paying people for their time...

So if a girl sits with me and she's horrible I will immediately tell her I don't want company or sometimes even get up and leave if she can't take a hint (say, excuse me I have to go to the restroom). But if a decent dancer sits down and I have a nice conversation with her or if she's pretty but not what I'm looking for I will usually get a dance or two from her. I'd rather do that than pay for a drink. Sometimes I've gone back and been surprised as maybe she gave me a better dance (or offered more) than expected.

I ran into that last night in detroit. Not every girl out there is an extras girl and sometimes you don't have the time to sit and have a conversation to find out. My best bet is just to take them in the back and see how they act or what they offer when I sit down. I'm only out of $30 in most cases anyway so it's not the end of the world if I just get a normal lap dance from a decent looking girl.

I don’t feel “obligated” to get dances from any dancer I just met – what I meant in the OP was w.r.t. dancers one already knows from past visits but don’t wanna get dances from on the current visit.

I normally don't even if they are my favorites. Sometimes I just like to sample other girls.

"Obligated" is how I feel about things outside a strip club. If I start to feel that way about stuff like getting dances, then I know it's time for somebody to administer a sharp blow to my head.

Seriously, my attitude is to only agree to a dance when I want it so bad I can't resist. If I'm not sure, I don't allow us to get into a long conversation that might leave her feel slighted. And, although great dances on past visits usually mean I'll want to get them again, the choice is always 100% optional for me.

If I might want her again in the future then I'll usually get a couple of dances just to keep our relationship going, but if I'm done with her then I feel no obligation. For example I used to love getting dances from one girl who is the first one to ever have an orgasm doing lap dances with me. But then she got fake breasts and I was done with her. I felt no obligation whatsoever despite our past history.

I may sometimes feel obligated to give a tip like $5 because we have had an acquaintance before. I would prefer not to get a lap dance because this would be a waste of my time.

"Oh, you want dances tonight, do you? But you came in here last week and didn't get any dances with me. Our relationship is finished. No more dances for you, mister."

Papi_Chulo, I've come to look at it as a "business expense." The older I get, the more I hate throwing money away at the club that doesn't get little Carlos a snowy eruption. Still, I find myself buying dances from girls on an emotional basis--because it helps them or it makes me feel like a good guy. I'd love to just be able to make the club experience a business experience and wrap the whole thing in a ribbon as such. But life is never that neat or fair. I pay far less on this as I did as a greenhorn, but it still creeps into my clubbing.The challenge is that every place I try as new or "new again" I find this part of my game creeping in.

I did in my early days. Dancers will always hustle to reach and surpass their goal. A polite no has never stopped the girls from approaching on future visits and made my time more enjoyable.

If it starts feeling obligatory, that's generally when I need to take a break from the club.

I've had halfway in between when a fave asked me to buy a dance from a friend (before I dropped a bundle on the fave). Often worked out well.

C asked me to buy one from a friend. It was mediocre at best. Friend asked if I'd buy one more. I had no interest, but was feeling generous, so told her I would if she gave the dance to (the very bi) C instead. Damn -- the stuff that women can get away with on the main floor.

J asked me to buy one from P. Although never surpassing J, P quickly became a fave. Which became even better when J hung it up.

I've had this happen a few times.

But, I like variety now too. So, getting repeat dances from a girl I've known for quite sometime, doesn't do it for me anymore. I'd rather experience someone new now (unless the experience was so good that I wanted a re-tap... But that rarely happens anymore).