Is Your Lap Taken?

all of y'all? WTF part of the south did you come from. :)

Since the best seats at my favorite club are basically bar stools, it is almost impossible for a dancer to sit in my lap. At other clubs I really don't find any correlation as to whether I have more fun or not.

I usually just watch them in action. See how long they spend in vip. The overall vibe I get is a big deal including her sitting on my lap

I hate it when a dancer sits on my lap without introducing herself.

Introducing herself and asking if I want company, and then sitting on my lap after I say yes is ok. That I said yes indicates a very high likelihood on my part of spending, so it's very unlikely I'll have to awkwardly invite her off my lap a few minutes later.

I prefer when a dancer asks if I would like company and sits at my table in the seat next to me. I find these dancers to typically be more professional and easy to deal with. And, I don't find it means less mileage or less likely to do more than dance.

Slick, we are so similar, but I want the dancer to sit on my face.

@Shadow-Well, the Southwest, of course.

I'm a big fan of this myself Slick, but it doesn't happen often at the clubs in my area. In my estimation, MOST dancers are not that forward/friendly.

They might sit on your lap, but it's not likely to happen when she first introduces herself/when you first meet her...it's a lot more likely to happen after she's become a favorite/CF

sc,

I don't understand what y'all are askin' SS?

I am likely the "Southest" TUSCLer, but Florida is weird. The further south you go, the more north you get!

@Clubber-How right you are. When I was ten, we visited our family down in Argentina. I've been there before but this time we went to Patagonia and Tierra Del Fuego. I thought we were in Alaska. It's cold, rugged, and desolate.

SS,

Wasn't the climate I was talking about. It's the people. So many come here from the north that I am a rarity. A native of S. Florida.

Slic, I'm with you. I love it when a dancer just plops herself down on my lap. I find it is usually an indicator of good things to come.

However, I have also had just a couple of dancers in my club-going career use it to their advantage to extract a tip from me when I decline dances with them. They feel that for all the extra effort and time they put into their solicitation, that they should be paid something for it.

Sitting on my lap doesn't really do much for me, I've had it happen a few times.

One time though, there was this hot dancer that I hadn't seen before, she sat down on my lap and started sensually kissing my cheek and neck and feeling up on my body. She asked me for a dance after 5 minutes of doing that. How could I say no to that?

I shutter to think if some of the dancers I've seen in my many years decided to plop down on me. I'm sure the couch/chair would groan, MOOOO!

@slick - I would love that, but unfortunately dancers sitting on your lap out on the floor is a no-no in the clubs I go to. The last time it happened to me the DJ called the girl to the booth to be reprimanded, lol. I guess the thinking is they shouldn't be in your lap unless you're paying for a dance in the back.

Here's a strange twist - I once was in a club in Orlando - which of course is famous for no touch, no contact air dances - and this little russian spinner spent my whole visit sitting in my lap. I was buying her vodka shots and we were hugging, kissing and basically making out, and no one said a word. The only time she got off would be when they announced a dance special, then she would do an air dance a foot & a half away from me. As soon as the dance was over she would hop back on my lap for more canoodling! Just more evidence of strip club back-asswardness.

@clubber - yep, spinners only!

I don't like a dancer to sit on my lap during that first introduction. If I already know I'm not attracted to her, I resent it. If I am attracted to her, I like to not be distracted while the initial "interview" is going on to see if I want to pursue her. Once I know her, she should be on my lap a lot!

The only thing that's come close to a dancer coming up and hopping on my lap right away?.....nothing....never...not even close to that happening in the clubs I've been to. I must be going to all the wrong places.

One of my favorite stripper lines is, "Excuse me, is that lap taken?"

When that line is followed by an introduction and request for permission to sit in my lap, I usually enjoy the visit.

When the young damsel makes manual several adjustments to improve her "seat," I usually have a very good time.

That said, I am not convinced lap vs chair is a definitive marker for entertainment value!

I don't like it when a new girl just walks up and plops on your lap, but if they introduce themselves and ask if I want company, if they sit in the chair instead of my lap, my experience is that they probably won't be as much fun later, but if they sit in your lap, that gives you a chance to do a little keno and see how she responds.

Its very rare for a dancer that I dont know to sit in my lap on our first meeting. They have no idea how inwill react so it is only after I get to know them that they dive right in. It doesn't happen very often, but it pisses me off when I see a dancer jumping into every guys lap in the club but when she eventually gets to me she either sits next to me or stands 3 feet away. I assume that they are not girl friendly and tell them as much. Usually only then do they jump into my lap but by then the fantasy is already destroyed and I bump them off of my lap and send them on their way......hopefully a bit wiser.

lopaw,

I would bet you get a lot of eye time from the guys when a dancer is your lap. Most all guys are lesbians at heart. :)

@Clubber "Most all guys are lesbians at heart."

uhhh, no, no they aren't.

Speak for yourself. I would bet anything that most here and everywhere prefer women.

Clubber,

Yes I believe that is quite true....I know that shadowcat is a lesbian at heart for sure!

I definitely do get quite a bit of attention when a girl is sitting in my lap but I would just as soon not. Although the attention is never negative or anything when I'm hunting in a club I just want to be treated like any other PL.

Usually the only ones who sit on my lap without introduction are the overweight ones - then it becomes real awkward. That is why I either sit on a bar stool or at a table. I do appreciate when a dancer gives me the old Memphis handshake.

I don't mind a dancer sitting on my lap unless she weighs more than me. Then I might think she was a wrestler and trying to pin me down.

If a heifer comes over and looks like she might plop down, a simple "Hold on porky!" always works.

When a dancer sits on my lap, I say, "Hold on to the handle so you don't fall off!"

A dancer who sits on my lap AND wiggles her ass will cause my logic circuits to shutdown, the wallet slipping out of my back pocket. Twenty dollar bills marching out and sliding into the purse.

Alas, the ass on my life is so awesome.

@Dain-Classic.

@Sippy-I love me a Detroit Handshake.