Paying for sex vs. "paying" for "free" sex

Electronman
Too much of a good thing is never enough
What are the relative economic benefits of:

a) a straight forward "pay for play" arrangement with a sexually uninhibited woman (escort, AMP or stripper)-- to be fair, you need to also think about the risks associated with the arrangement (legal risks in our sexually conservative U.S. and risks of STDs)

versus

b) the hidden and not so hidden costs of meeting a woman, dating (food, drinks, movies, concerts), flowers, pretending to enjoy the chick flick that she wants you to see, meeting her family and friends and the other hidden "costs" all in hopes of eventually having "free" sex-- maybe two weeks, two months or two years after starting the relationship?

I hope I haven't biased the comparison too much.

19 comments

  • mjx01
    11 years ago
    a) on average probably less $ assuming you don't wind up need to take the hiv cocktail for the rest of your life (rap it up!)

    b) kids... they might be useful when you're old and decrepid (although, NO guarantee)
  • Dougster
    11 years ago
    Ask alutard. He thinks there is no difference. LMFAO!
  • gawker
    11 years ago
    I spent an hour & a half in the sack with a stripper for free last night. I did take her to dinner and a few drinks first ($100), loaned her $150 to get a new phone (which will never be repaid), and a couple of weeks ago, took her shopping ($147). So, she is not a whore and I have no obligation or commitment in the morning after. This is the best arrangement IMHO.
  • tumblingdice
    11 years ago
    ^^^Rekwag,it wasn't free.
  • gawker
    11 years ago
    dice: it's never free. You pay one way or another. Sometimes for the rest of your life.
  • tumblingdice
    11 years ago
    Granted.
  • Alucard
    11 years ago
    Costs of "Variety" vs "Fidelity".
  • tumblingdice
    11 years ago
    ^^^Will you please be quiet.
  • jackslash
    11 years ago
    I think you can make a good case that pay for play is better economically. But what about love, family and children?
  • jester214
    11 years ago
    I've yet to have a civilian stop mid BJ and tell me I have to buy her more dinners before I can pop in her mouth.

    Pros might be cheaper but you should get a lot more for what you spend with civilians, if you aren't you need to find some different ones.
  • rh48hr
    11 years ago
    I think it all depends on what you are looking for in your life that makes the choice the best one.

    Some guys have no interest in being attached to one woman and don't want to deal with the dating game in the hopes of getting some. Pay for services rendered then walk away, no strings.

    Some guys want to be with someone they can love spend time with, do things with and the sex is important but not the end all be all. They don't mind spending the money on the woman.

    The problem for guy number two comes in when the person they want to spend time with doesn't want sex at the same frequency or at all. Then they become guy number one.
  • Alucard
    11 years ago
    ^^^^ You always LOSE s_c!
  • Alucard
    11 years ago
    If you want to be able to fuck whenever you wish, stick with Sex Workers or don't commit to a serious relationship, that way you don't betray a Significant Other.
  • rickdugan
    11 years ago
    lol sippy.

    On the topic: Paying for stripper sex is definitely more expensive on a per pop basis than "free sex", at least over any stretch of time with any one woman. The problem is that "free" sex often comes with feelings and other things attached. When you fuck a stripper or an escort, then as the old saying goes, you not't paying for the sex, you're paying her to leave when it's done.

    As a married guy, p4p side action is the only way to go. I have no interest in keeping a side girlfriend or mistress - it is way too messy.
  • AnonymousJim
    11 years ago
    Rick ... spot on.

    There are very, very few women I've run across who are OK with "just sex." In fact, I've had a few times where I felt like OTC was on the table with a girl at the club, but I began to sense the OTC was going to be tied to some sort of eventual assurance of "other" OTC activities -- dinner, phone calls, social media, whatever. That's usually the point where I try to clairify: I have a SO and you have to be OK with the idea that this is about one thing and one thing only. I like you, but I don't need another girlfriend, just some company tonight. Usually that's meant the end of it, including any P4P OTC possibility.

    I think this is also why a lot of escort service is less than stellar. I think a lot of women feel like they're resigning themselves to something anathema to their being by letting guys that don't want them "forever and ever!" get a piece.

    The good ITC/OTC/escorts are able to take to it like us men do: The sex, itself, is the good part, while anything else that comes of it is bonus. And I really don't understand why more women don't/can't think that way. Hoping it's not something hard-wired but rather cultural such that, in time, we can change it.
  • Otto22
    11 years ago
    A wise man once said, "The difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for free costs more." Amen!
  • SlickSpic
    11 years ago
    I prefer to warm up 3 beef livers in the microwave, let them cool down to body temperature, stuff them into a tennis ball canister, and go to town.
  • georgmicrodong
    11 years ago
    The notion of "Variety" *versus* "Fidelity" is a false dichotomy. One can have both.

    Well, *some* of us can, anyway. I can see where some might not get either one.
  • georgmicrodong
    11 years ago
    @ldk: Really? So if one of the dancers who fucks for money were to offer you "free" sex for life if you just marry her, that would be "more desireable" than just paying her a flat fee each time you want it?
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