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First time couple

Avatar for Ham12
Ham12

My wife and I are going to a strip club for the first time this Saturday after years of me asking.She never was interested in going before and I am a little apprehensive because we have not been on the same page in the sex department for a long time. Any suggestions or advice.We are in the far west suburbs of Illinois and I am thinking about High HEELS Saloon.

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Avatar for sclvr5005
sclvr5005

I have clubbed with a few cool chicks that really wanted to go and we had a blast. But one time I brought a gf and although she agreed to go with me deep down she hated it and it showed. It was a miserable visit and we left after only about 20 minutes. Food for thought.

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Avatar for SlickSpic
SlickSpic

No suggestions or advice except to go with no expectations other than an enjoyable evening. Let us know how it goes.

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Avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong

Take her to dinner at a nice place before you go. A place with a wine she likes. Don't get her smashed, just relaxed. And be up front about it, too. Tell her that you want her to have enough to be relaxed, but still be herself, and let her decide how many drinks that is. If you get her drunk, and she does something she'll later regret, it will be your fault for "forcing" her to go.

However, it it's taken you "years of [...] asking" to get her to go, be prepared for her to hate it. Leave as soon as you detect even a hint of "I'm done" from her. Get the fuck out right then, and go someplace she wants to go. Staying longer than she wants will generate resentment for a good while after you leave. Like a month or more. :)

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Avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter

The way you described it, you've been bugging her about something she doesn't want to do for years. So now she has agreed to go through with it so that next time you talk about it or anytime for years to come, she can say she tried it, doesn't like it, and doesn't see why you need to go either. She will stay quiet and go through with and start complaining shortly after arriving. If you want to avoid this I would suggest asking her if there is another place she would like to visit, maybe making some suggestions she might like. If she says yes, then bingo, she didn't want to go in the first place.

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Avatar for Alucard
Alucard

"I am a little apprehensive because we have not been on the same page in the sex department for a long time."

Based on that statement alone, I'd say DON'T go. BUT only you know your wife best.

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Avatar for dalex
dalex

this one's kinda strange to me because during my binging months I've literally been at some strip club every day, and got to know a lot of strippers.

Going back with my SO other is now weird because I don't want some friendly stripper to get too friendly and raise type of questions I don't want to answer.

Pretty much every club in the city and the city over is off limits.

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Avatar for DandyDan
DandyDan

I'm not sure how going with your wife will end well being she's always resisted til now.

It probably depends on your location, and High Heels might be the closest one to you, but I've gone there a couple times when I was on vacation (used to live in the west suburbs of Chicago myself and still have some friends there), but frankly, I was unimpressed with that place. But much of the Chicago area is a strip club dead zone.

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Avatar for Player11
Player11

I don't understand. If she does not show any interest why do you keep asking her? Do you have a mental disorder or simply no respect? Unless she likes girls I see nothing positive for you in the experience. Why would you want to share your SC hobby (simply something a wife would resent and see as a money drain) with your wife. It should be a state secret.

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Avatar for Club_Goer_Seattle
Club_Goer_Seattle

I suggest you contact m00tpoint. "They" are an experienced couples customer and happen to live in the Chicago area. Send them a private message to ask for advice on choice of clubs, where to sit in the clubs, and protocol for couples customers. (Notice that the spelling of their name is two zeros as the first two "o's.") See their profile at:

/u.php

Good luck, and please do let us know how the evening turns out. Suggest you write a review of your experience, as you have no reviews to date.

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Avatar for duomaxwell
duomaxwell

Unless she's bisexual, bicurious, or terrifically confident in her sexuality and your relationship you're just going to be opening a Pandora's box of insecurity and resenment. Every time you look at a dancer your wife will file it into her mental "oh, now I'm not hot/sexy/good enough" folder and whenever you tip a dancer she'll think to herself how that's money you could be spending on her. You COULD have taken her on vacation, but instead you spent X amount of money on some bimbo named after a mid-sized sedan. And God forbid you get a lap dance.

I've seen this happen with so many couples that come into the club. One such visit resulted in a confirmed separation.

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Avatar for lopaw
lopaw

The wise folks here have spoken. I've witnessed a few crash & burn scenarios myself and it ain't pretty to see, much lee experience first hand. And of course she will not let you forget it til the day you die.

Bottom line is unless it's her idea to go and she brings it up all on her own......fuggedabouddit. Especially under the strained circumstances that the OP noted.

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Avatar for wankfiend
wankfiend

I'm actually taking a female friend of mine who's never been to a strip club to one up by Chicago. So, I have the same question only we aren't a couple and it was her idea. (So female friendly SC instead of couples one I guess)

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Avatar for doogieh75
doogieh75

Ham...If this isn't her idea. Tell her no, don't go. Take her to a nice dinner, and do some really romantic things for her. Show her that she is the person that you need, and strippers don't hold a candle to her. Show her you appreciate the trust she shows in you.

Then wait for her to suggest it later, make sure it is her idea. If it isn't you can easily ruin your marriage.

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Avatar for SlickSpic
SlickSpic

Player, Duo, and Lopaw came out with some wicked, writing skills. Great advice but beautiful use of the English language.

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Avatar for merlin1583
merlin1583

My GF and I go to strip clubs together all the time. We've gotten to the point where if its just the two of us going to a bar for some drinks, we would both rather see some topless ladies. She was very apprehensive at first too but now she talks me into going. It helps that she was a closet "bi-curious" girl but she says I made her feel like the first trip to the strip club was "all about her". I see couples all the time where you can clearly tell the woman doesn't want to be there but the man just keeps looking at the girls. I agree with the person above that said you need to pay attention to your wife and if she even hints at not enjoying it, get out fast.

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Avatar for Ham12
Ham12

You all have given me a lot to consider and think about. Thank you!

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Avatar for Ham12
Ham12

I decided it may be better if we did go. She was upset because she felt like I pushed for it for so long and now I said no. She admitted she was not into it. She was going to try to become more of who she thinks I want her to be. I just wanted to spice things up and possibly excite her a bit. It would be nice if we could find something that would be sexually exciting for both of us.

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Avatar for lopaw
lopaw

"She admitted she was not into it. She was going to try to become more of who she thinks I want her to be."

This is the kind of stuff that gives dancers (and honest-to-goodness real SC female customers like me) nightmares.

Prediction: Horrible stripclub visit waiting to happen. Hope I'm wrong.....but I'm probably not.

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Avatar for Ham12
Ham12

I made a type o. I meant to say (better if we do not go). And we didn't.

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Avatar for lopaw
lopaw

Phew!

Sounds like you made the right decision :)

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