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To StripperWeb, With Love From TUSCL.

Let's do this.

I'm gonna try NOT to be as big an asshole as I usually am here. I'll also try to hold back on the fucking profanity.

We talk about what we want from dancers ALL THE TIME. But aside from a few lovely ladies here on TUSCL list, no dancers are really hearing us.

Is there ANYTHING you'd like the girls over at StripperWeb to know? Any tips from the TUSCL customers POV? Any opinions on the girls at SC's and on StripperWeb are welcome. Likes or Dislikes? Anything you want new girls coming into the industry to know.

Let them know what the fuck is really up when it comes to the customers they loathe so much.

I want to say this:

1. If a customer tips you on stage, go thank him and see if he wants a dance when you get off the stage. That's probably why he gave you the tip anyway, as a heads up that he wants a dance when you're finished on stage. But, you already know that, so why deliberately miss out on the money he's prepared to give you?

2. If you just finished giving lap dances to some smelly motherfucker, please go in the back and freshen up. If you can smell him chances are that shit is gonna rub off on you, and if you come to me next I'll smell it. You don't have to be a Polar Bear to smell body odor up close. That's how I'll remember you: H.B.O. girl. Handle that shit.

3. IF YOU'RE DOING "extras", BJ's to be exact, please please please learn your craft. Putting your mouth on my cock and bobbing your head is not giving blowies. Go watch some Nina Hartley instructional videos or something. She knows what the fuck is up.

4. To the cam girl on StripperWeb who was talking about "the pus oozing" out of her newly enhanced b(.Y.)bs: That's fucking gross.

5. And stop being so harsh when you talk about us on StripperWeb. It's mean.

Fuck the radio! And fuck top 40! Nothing deflates my erection like a Ke$ha song. "Dis place is bout ta blow-ow-ow-ow-ow-ow-ow-oh-oh-ooohhh!"

Alucard, you can even tell them not to drink and take prescription pills if you want.

nickifree, you hate everything, right? Let them know.

*Let's do this, then after a few days we can send this over to the pink site to declare wa...I mean, to let them know what we think.