Boyfriends and husbands in the club

avatar for erik270
erik270
New York
The thread about strippers asking the customers if they are married got me thinking. What do the customers think of the dancers' boyfriends and husbands hanging out in the club? For that matter, what do the dancers think? Does it hurt your income?

At one club I frequented, one dancer's husband hung out at the club after he got off work. They would joke about whether he should have to tip her at the stage when he does't have to pay for it at home. It was uncomfortable for me for like 5 seconds when I was getting dance from her on one couch while he was on another, but then I realized he was getting a lap dance from one of the other girls so nobody's got room to complain. It did kill the mood when one of them would ask whose turn it was to pick up the kids at school the next day, but I just sorta blocked that out.

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avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
13 years ago
At the now closed Crazy Horse Saloon in Atlanta, they had a sign on the front door. "No husbands or boy friends". That is kind of difficult to enforce. Who knows who is married or to whom, etc.

I know one dancer who's husband is always in the club when she is working. She lost her drivers license for two consecutive DUIs. It didn't bother me. The more she drank the better her dances got. He didn't care. She was bringing in the money.
avatar for Alucard
Alucard
13 years ago
If I can participate in extras in Bogart's open VIP with others watching, then having a BF or Hubby in the Club while I'm with a Dancer is NOT going to bother me at ALL!! LMAO

Now how it may impact on the Dancer only she would know.

If He can just sit there while I may be getting Fucked or Sucked by his GF or Wife...Well that IMHO makes him a pretty Fucking Bad excuse of a BF or Hubby!!
avatar for rh48hr
rh48hr
13 years ago
It's her job, so if he has a problem with it, he shouldn't be in the club. Ignorance is bliss! Especially if she is providing customers with extras.
avatar for deogol
deogol
13 years ago
If it's "just a job" there shouldn't be any problem with it.

For those RIL, I can see a problem though. In my opinion, having BFs and husbands in a club can keep things a bit more on the up and up, so to say. Best behavior and all.

Personally, I don't think a relationship can last through a stripping career. It's time to stop flirting and showing off when a relationship is in play.
avatar for jackslash
jackslash
13 years ago
I have met a few boyfriends and husbands of dancers in the club, but not while I was getting a LD from the girl. It seems to me that it would be uncomfortable all around.
avatar for JacksonEsskay
JacksonEsskay
13 years ago
A club I went to a while back was managed by one of the dancer's husbands. He told me that he only got bothered if a customer was being rude to her, but that he was bothered by that regardless of who the dancer was. He also said that watching his wife strip and dance for other guys was a turn-on for him.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
13 years ago
If the boyfriends become boyfriends without intending to be called that, then that may be why they don't care that much. They may go along with her calling him such and be looking around to have fun with other girls while denying everything. I remember one dancer told me she was married but that her husband was an a..hole and then she proceeded to give me a good grind during a lap dance and hung out with me a lot in the club sitting on my lap and not asking for a dance a lot of the time. I'm not expecting extras from a married girl though. I think I would have to tell her to stop if I knew she was married and she tried to go too far.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
13 years ago
I worry more about dancers who tell me they don't have a boyfriend and act like they want to hook up. They are up to something. She's been working in strip clubs for years and has no boyfriend. hmmm, maybe she's telling the truth. Maybe she only has one or two boyfriends and doesn't care for them. You know she has to have at least an ex boyfriend visiting if she suddenly tells you one night she has a kid.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
13 years ago
I would be on guard if the boyfriend or spouse was one of the extremely large bouncers working in the club. She may not tell you but one of the other dancers might.
avatar for motorhead
motorhead
13 years ago
I've known a few boyfriends that come to the club. I won't get dances from those girls. Just ask yourself - why is he there?
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
13 years ago
If the bouncers are small and tiny along with whomever is her boyfriend and you don't care, then no sweat.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
13 years ago
I did find it alarming when one dancer talked about giving me an extra if I ever went into the back room and one of the other dancers told me her boyfriend or spouse was one of the bouncers. A bouncer seemed to confirm that in a friendly manner by buying me a drink after I bought his girlfriend a drink while she was chatting with me. I never went into the back room with that particular dancer. Later on, she acted like she didn't even have a boyfriend so I don't know if they broke up or she was trying a new angle on me.
avatar for SuperDude
SuperDude
13 years ago
And we wonder why there are shootings in the parking lot at 2AM. Drunk boyfriends, husbands, OTC customers and guns are a dangerous mix.
avatar for lopaw
lopaw
13 years ago
The few times that dancers have mentioned that their boyfriend or husband was I the club, I have walked away. Don't like it one bit. And to think that maybe he's watching and getting off on me getting dances with his old lady makes it creepy as hell.
avatar for deogol
deogol
13 years ago
^^^ Don't forget the stabbings and maulings too.
avatar for mjx01
mjx01
13 years ago
I've lost count of home many BFs xATF has/had. As to the OP, I think management usually discuorages BFs in club.
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
13 years ago
My only experience with this was with my ATF some ears ago. She was sitting with me when another customer came in. She told me that he was becoming more than a customer to her. She did go to see him, but came right back to me.

Over the next couple of times I saw her, we talked about this guy. Then one day, she tells me she is moving in with him. Now he was a responsible guy with a good job and a future, and not some druggie loser. She seemed quite happy for some time.

Then one visit, I was in the club before her. She came in, I thought to work, but told me to hang a minute and she'd be back. She was, but with all her club belongings and still in her civilian clothes. She asked me to take her somewhere to eat and said she needed to talk with me. This I did and she poured out her heart to me about her relationship going sour. A pregnancy was involved.

What this did to be was to be wary of getting to involved with dancers. She is still the only one that I've gotten close with.

I have a current fave that was heading that way, but I've seemed to have learned.
avatar for SnakePlissken
SnakePlissken
13 years ago
" they had a sign on the front door. "No husbands or boy friends". "

I wonder how many delusional PL's the "no boyfriends" part kept out.
avatar for looneylarry
looneylarry
13 years ago
I don't think we should automatically assume the dancer's SO is a boyfriend or husband. In some cases it could be another dancer. That's why it pays to listen closely when dancers are talking about other dancers. And it doesn't necessarily mean that they identify as lesbians. There are situational behaviors that don't change their sexual orientation. You see it in artificial settings, like same-sex prisons, where there is sex going on but the players haven't changed their orientations. Dancers can sometimes hook up with other dancers but yet truthfully tell you that they are completely hetero. But those other "hookups" could be watching your lapper as well. So there are a multitude of possible combinations in the SC, and you are never quite sure who is actually doing who. So it is better to not think about it.
avatar for Club_Goer_Seattle
Club_Goer_Seattle
13 years ago
I'm with lopaw on this one. I didn't like it just the one time was ever mentioned to me. If I knew a boyfriend or husband was in the club, at least I wouldn't get dances with that dancer that night. In all my years of club-going, that didn't happen to me until a few months ago. I was asking the dancer that I knew, if she was still living with her grandmother. She said, "Oh no. I moved in with my boyfriend about a month ago." I then asked if he was a customer of hers. She said, "Yes, and he's sitting right over there (pointing to someone about 30 feet away)." I wish she had told me that before our dances. As I left the club a half hour later, she was sitting in his lap.
avatar for Stiletto25
Stiletto25
13 years ago
I don't know what to say in this. I danced at a club for awhile that was raided by the police all the time. I mean all the time. We even had a raid drill down. One dancer used to bring her boyfriend in and he'd sit right outside the VIP and watch the door and give everyone in VIP a signal if he felt something was off. He was actually an exceptional lookout. They are still together so I guess that's working out for them. It never has for me though. And I would prefer not to deal with it. I've seen normal boyfriends, who are usually very even tempered, completely fly off the handle in the club. You just never know what will set someone off in a jealous fit
avatar for DandyDan
DandyDan
13 years ago
I did have one confrontation with a dancer's husband once. I was told never to get a dance from his wife again. She disappeared for some time after that, but eventually she came back and told me she was seeking a divorce. My current ATF quit dancing for 3 years or so because she got married, but naturally enough, he was a loser who ended up in jail when he got busted for meth possession, in violation of probation. Nowadays, she does whatever the hell she wants.
avatar for bang69
bang69
13 years ago
Stilletto is correct you never know what may happen if a dancer brings her SO with her to the club
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
13 years ago
I'm with lopaw, too. It tends to really inhibit me.

There's one local bartender whose behaviour changes radically when her baby daddy is in the club. When he's there, she's a sourpuss. When he's not, she's a very playful little minx. Fortunately, he's easily recognizable.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
13 years ago
Lopaw is right on the money. No thanks. In fact, why would a guy want to watch his wife crawl on other men? You'd think that he would have more self-respect than that.
avatar for Alucard
Alucard
13 years ago
"No thanks. In fact, why would a guy want to watch his wife crawl on other men? You'd think that he would have more self-respect than that"

That's why IMO any guy doing that is a pretty Bad excuse of a BF or Husband.
avatar for igloo9999
igloo9999
13 years ago
Around here most.clubs forbid husbands, BFs or SOs ( no matter what sex). It's simply because too many have lost it too many times. On the other hand if they have proven that they are good, it's overlooked. When I was dating an ex, I would spend most of the afternoon in the club. We tried to keep of quiet but it was one of the worst kept secrets around. I was later told by the bartender and a couple of the girls that they felt safer with me there.
avatar for steve229
steve229
13 years ago
The title of this post reminded me of a dancer who had a husband (some Pakistani guy she married so he could get a green card and she could leave rent free in his house) and a boyfriend. As far as I know, however, they were never in the club at the same time, lol.
avatar for canny
canny
13 years ago
I know the boyfriend of one of my favorite dancers and I always feel uncomfortable around him. She introduced us.
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