50% goes to taxes
40% goes to my 4 ex-wives
10% goes to my church
That doesn't leave any left. I live on the streets. I'm pretty good with my hands so I repair stripper shoes in exchange for a little food. Usually a Red Bull and a candy bar.
Some of the older dancers give me sympathy dances. The younger ones seem to be more greedy though and won't talk to me - except when they have a shoe emergency.
Lol farmer. I was thinking something similar, though of course I do not operate on your scale.
After paying my employees and other busines expenses, there is nothing left, so I am forced to fuck old ladies for $$$ so that I can pay the young ones. Don't let the old gals driving those 15 year old Buicks fool you - they have the cash! I like to work the local Senior Centers as these ladies are more active and can usually still lubricate a little, but I'll admit that when I've gotten really desperate for my SC fix, I've resorted to selling myself in a few of the local nursing home dining rooms. I suppose that it is only fitting - life is all about balance after all. ;)
And guess what? Today is the second Wednesday of the month, which means some of these fine ladies will be receiving their Social Security deposits! Finally! I hate the time gap between the 4th Wednesday of the previous month and the second Wednesday of the next month - it is my slow period, so I have to scale back my club activities. But today is payday, so, with a little luck, I should be back in the clubs in full swing tonight!
rickdugan - Cheer up. Next month the little old ladies get a 3.6% cost of living increase that they will pass on to you. I know the strippers are looking foreward to mine. :))
@motorhead- I hear there's a "church" just outside Houston city limits called St. James that has worship services more up your alley.
@rick- Yeah, that period between 4th Wed., and 2nd Wed is tough. I have some ideas for other sources during this dry spell, but it requires some leg work on your part. Do some networking with contacts to find out where widows of "good" corporate pensioners live who got survivorship benefits, and seek them out. These folks get paid on the first of the month. Better yet, seek out those who got giant lump sum distribution. Happy Hunting!
Juice you must be psychic! I got my performance review today, a week early! I got another 10% raise! (should be double IMHO, but with the economy and two consecutive years of -5% and -10% salary cuts, these last two year raises have been very nice!)
Too much, unless they give me a good deal at the strip club. 25% is way too high. I would demand a two for one deal. Us poor people need deals to keep going to all those expensive strip clubs. Bottled beer is outrageously high in some clubs now costing almost $5 a bottle before the tip to the waitress. Our company 401K advisor suggested we predrink before going out to clubs to save money. I'm thinking good tip if you don't drink too much. Otherwise you might just end up staying home. My other thought was that our company 401K advisor must either have lax drunk driving laws in her state or only sips on one small drink.
I could really use some byob clubs to make a comeback. The club would probably be crowded if they had decent entertainment as well.
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Sheesh..........
40% goes to my 4 ex-wives
10% goes to my church
That doesn't leave any left. I live on the streets. I'm pretty good with my hands so I repair stripper shoes in exchange for a little food. Usually a Red Bull and a candy bar.
Some of the older dancers give me sympathy dances. The younger ones seem to be more greedy though and won't talk to me - except when they have a shoe emergency.
When did the minimum wage go up?
After paying my employees and other busines expenses, there is nothing left, so I am forced to fuck old ladies for $$$ so that I can pay the young ones. Don't let the old gals driving those 15 year old Buicks fool you - they have the cash! I like to work the local Senior Centers as these ladies are more active and can usually still lubricate a little, but I'll admit that when I've gotten really desperate for my SC fix, I've resorted to selling myself in a few of the local nursing home dining rooms. I suppose that it is only fitting - life is all about balance after all. ;)
And guess what? Today is the second Wednesday of the month, which means some of these fine ladies will be receiving their Social Security deposits! Finally! I hate the time gap between the 4th Wednesday of the previous month and the second Wednesday of the next month - it is my slow period, so I have to scale back my club activities. But today is payday, so, with a little luck, I should be back in the clubs in full swing tonight!
@motorhead- I hear there's a "church" just outside Houston city limits called St. James that has worship services more up your alley.
@rick- Yeah, that period between 4th Wed., and 2nd Wed is tough. I have some ideas for other sources during this dry spell, but it requires some leg work on your part. Do some networking with contacts to find out where widows of "good" corporate pensioners live who got survivorship benefits, and seek them out. These folks get paid on the first of the month. Better yet, seek out those who got giant lump sum distribution. Happy Hunting!
Depends, but if my math is correct, you could end up with $280 out of a $1000 paycheck. :)
Ouch motor, tough living. Those bitches might not appreciate the work you're doing, but us retifists do.
:) Too soon?
I could really use some byob clubs to make a comeback. The club would probably be crowded if they had decent entertainment as well.