Tipping for their time/conversation

12/1/2010 7:34:22 AM

There are several dancers I have no interest in buying dances from whatsoever. They are low mileage. If I try to cop a feel on them I get brushed away. They are regular dancers at the club and can catch me up on the gossip/insider news. They sit with me for 20-30 minutes and then finally start pushing the dance sales with me. I have no interest in it whatsoever but feel like I should compensate them somehow for their time/conversation. Buying a $30 lap dance would be spending too much on it. I usually tip less than $10 to them depending on if I already bought a $6 drink for them. Unnecessary expense but I do enjoy the occasional juicy gossip. If I get a thank you or if they just move on then I am fine, but when they still get pissy and clingy with me for not buying dances I realize how foolish it was to tip them or buy a drink anyways.

What would you guys do? You would think they would get the hint after me coming there for all these years and never buying dances from them.

18 comments

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tttclub

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14 years ago

If they are too stupid to get the hint, that's their problem, not yours. I come across the same girls over and over again. With me, I have a problem (gift) in that my mouth really doesn't have a filter. If a girl sits down next to me, i pretty much tell them to go away if I'm not interested. When a girl sits with me that I usually get dances from, I pay for that "extra time" with a solid tip after a VIP session. The other ones that I'm not interested in, that's their problem. Call me a dick, whatever. I have money in my pocket, which to ME means, I control the situation. If they want to waste their time sitting with a guy that is not interested, it's not my problem.

boatmonkey

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14 years ago

I tell girls right away if I am not interested in getting a dance because I don't want to waste their time. I'm even OK with a girl who is sitting with me jumping up to take care of another customer first if she sees one walk in who she'll lose to another dancer if she waits and if I have time to wait for her return, again because these girls are trying to make a living and, usually, feed their kids.

I also don't talk about other dancers with a girl because I have been told by several that they hate it when anyone gossips about them - last thing I want is for my ATF to decide I'm a prying dickwad and cut me off!

Yes, I have the money but I see the "transaction" as something we should both enjoy as much as possible.

samsung1

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14 years ago

It is so easy for you guys in Detroit. Any girl there will usually let you grab her tits or ass and several will give extras. Here in Columbus, if you buy a dancer a drink or ask her how her day is going she might reply something like "it is so horrible today I just had to get some asshole thrown out because he was trying to grab my ass while I was dancing for him. Geesh does that idiot think we are prostitutes or something". I refuse to waste any more than $20 on these kind of dancers. They are stuck up and should work a different career if they have a problem getting felt up. They are fun to chat with but beyond I would be more entertained with flushing money down the toilet than getting a dance from them.

steve229

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14 years ago

In general terms, Iâ€™m not a fan of â€œtipping for time.â€ I figure spending time with a classy guy such as myself and enjoying my razor sharp wit should be reward enough for these girls, lol.

Now the situation you describe is more of a special case. In another thread I referred to these kind of dancers as â€œclub buddies,â€ i.e., dancers that know you and will hang out with you if they have nothing better to do and share club gossip, etc. If the club is slow, they may be using you as a safe haven â€“ they donâ€™t want to be the girl sitting at the bar by herself â€“ so youâ€™re actually helping them out. (Hey, maybe you should be charging them for your time?)

I will buy them a drink (as long as theyâ€™re regular priced drinks, not those over-priced â€œdancer drinksâ€), and if they go on stage, I make sure to go up and tip them, but I donâ€™t tip them for their time. If they ask about dances, I pull the deaf guy routine.

CTQWERTY

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14 years ago

Every once in a while I get a gal who, after asking if I'd like a dance, asks for a tip for her time. Usually they get nothing from me, but there was a time recently when I was seated at the main stage and the $1s were ready to go for tipping. Rather than argue with the gal, I gave her a $1. When she was looking to sell $35 a song dances, $1 ain't much and won't make a repeat pest out of her.

runnoft

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14 years ago

If a dancer comes up to me and asks to sit with me, if it is someone who I like to talk to but do not like to get dances from, I tell her up front that we can sit and talk for awhile and I will tip her 10 bucks for her time. I think it is only fair. They are not there to gossip, but to make money. Also, I usually tell her why I don't want any dances. It is usually because the girl in question is too lightweight as far as dances.
In the same vein, if a girl I do not know comes up to my table and sits with me, I am not afraid to be up front with her about the fact that I am looking for very high mileage dances and if she can deliver, let's go to the VIP and get it on. Otherwise, she is wasting her time with me.

txtittyfan

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14 years ago

I only pay for dances. Since I do not frequent strip clubs for "gossip", I never tip for time spent talking. If a dancer I have no interest in sits next to me, I either tell her I am not interested, or I ignore her.

Prim0

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14 years ago

The girls are there to make money. But isn't chatting up a customer in order to get him to buy dances part of their job. It's an investment on the dancer's part...not necessarily something they should be paid for. If they aren't aware that they are wasting their time on someone who doesn't want to buy thier product, it seems like that's on them. If they're good, they'll be able to change a guys mind or they'll realize its a lost cause and move on. After that, if they just want to hang out or can't take a hint, well too bad.

If I tip for time, it's going to have to be to a girl who is somehow showing me a great time. If she can do that while just sitting and chatting, I might give her something extra but I'm really there for a nice grind. THAT I'm happy to pay for.

SuperDude

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14 years ago

Detroit dancers will sit down, uninvited, and not take the hint to leave. Many, or most, or hoping that the customer will eventually buy a dance, wo why give up the seat to another customer. Of course she has to hustle her quota of $15.00 drinks or pay for them at tipout. I have been the solo customer in the booth on a slow afternoon with 4 or 5 dancers trying to sit with me--looking for dances, drinks, meals or tips. I have left--no bolted--the club to get away from the hustle. Paying for time or conversation--NEVER. I didn't invite it and I advised the dancer to move on and not her time. After the warning, she's on her own.

SuperDude

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14 years ago

..and not waste her time..

IrishLad

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14 years ago

I've never considered just paying for time.

BUT having been to clubs in many states, I have always gotten the impression that drinks are the currency for this kind of thing. (Overpriced) Drinks for chat, dollars for dances.

I do tend to let dancer's know if a dance is likely any time soon to help them decide how they want to spend their time. Just a polite "I'm not going to do any dances for a while I think, do you want a drink" if I want her to hang around. To be honest, I usually don't want her to hang around if I don't want a dance from her.

Clubber

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14 years ago

Steve is correct on this. They should pay me to allow them to sit with me. Now, if I feel I can get info from a dancer, I usually will do the drink thing.

jester214

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14 years ago

If I make it clear I'm not interested in talking with them I'm not giving them shit. If I actually sat and had a conversation with them, sure they deserve compensation.

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14 years ago

Depends on how well I know them. Like Steve says, I have some "club buddies" that I will talk to but not buy dances from. I'll buy drinks and occassionaly drop a 20 on them if I take them off the floor for a long conversation when they could be making money. Sometimes they just want to sit and talk/drink. In those cases, I would never offer them anything. It's never an obligation, it's always an investment or a friendly gesture. Sometimes you make it, sometimes you don't.

rickdugan

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14 years ago

I actually do this often. I don't generally like lapdances, so in a club where I am not known well this is my primary means of working towards an OTC discussion. In fact, in some clubs I think that this method works better than trying to negotiate from a lapdance chair, but opinions may vary.

bigdude012

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14 years ago

I've done it, however it is usually because the dance before left me too tired to get another dance right off. I'm tip then say try back later usually this works out well.

lopaw

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14 years ago

This happens to me often, but I rarely pay them for time served. Some can sit & yap for literally hours, and that's great if you want to save money, usually just buying them a couple of drinks (alot cheaper than over priced dances). When this becomes a problem, tho, is when they just won't leave, and you've got your eye on another dancer across the room. How do you politely get rid of an otherwise pleasant dancer who is not hitting you up for dances, but who just wants to chat and is overstaying her welcome?

farmerart

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14 years ago

I will gladly tip for conversation if the trend of the conversation is leading to OTC. Conversation tipping for OTC is usually cheaper for me than using the VIP and lap dances to prime the girl for OTC.

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