tuscl

feature dancers? what's the draw?

LeeH
Georgia
Tuesday, July 27, 2010 4:15 AM
The only club that I've been to that has "feature dancers" is the Pink Pony. I think I've been there on 4 nights when they had one (out of the 15-20 times that I've been there). Shit, that's $200 just in covers. ;-) Anyway, there wasn't a one of them that could dance her way out of a wet paper bag. They all looked like they watched the club dancers for 5 minutes and thought "I can do that". What's really annoying is that the club dancers can't dance when the feature is on. The last time a feature was there, I was with a great dancer who *really* knew how to dance -- very sexy and seductive. I don't do VIPs at PP (my one VIP there sucked and it was the club's fault, so I'm not gonna try with another dancer), but I was ready to drop almost as much on LDs from this girl as if we had gone to VIP. Then the feature came out, and everything ground to a halt. Fortunately, the dancer I was with was very fun just to hang with, so it wasn't a total loss. She was actually more interested in watching the feature than I was. And the feature couldn't dance worth shit. The sexiest out-of-the-ordinary thing she did was to mock-fellate a rolled-up poster of herself, that she eventually gave to someone. I think she might have been a porn star, which might explain her having freakin' posters of herself. I kept talking down the boring-ass feature (trying to back-hand compliment the dancer I was with) and she walked the line between agreeing with the customer and making sure I wasn't a spy for club mgmt. ;-) But I just don't get it. You have 25 dancers sitting on their asses doing nothing, not earning any tip-outs for the club. If they weren't already with someone when the feature came out, they can't be "cultivating" the next customer either. And the DJ is busting his ass trying to get the crowd revved up (if it wasn't for alcohol, he would've had no shot at all). I realize that some club owners are business idiots (witness the Tiffany's/Clydesdale's/Diamond Club debacle here in Atlanta), but what is the idea behind feature dancers other than to suck money from the club?

30 comments

  • Rod8432
    14 years ago
    Shadowcat - Yeah, I think you're right in that all the clubs in the city limits feature nudity, alcohol, and food. Somehow though, I was under the impression PP books these feature acts in order to comply in some way with their business license, and perhaps not so much because patrons really want them. Also, PP is part of the larger Showbar enterprise which schedules feature acts, so it just may be part of their business model. In any case, I'm not generally a fan of them and concur with LeeH above, that the acts can be kind of a buzz kill for the regular dancers and patrons. Have fun at Follies and PP when you go. I like them both for their own reasons, which I've reviewed before on TUSCL.
  • troop
    14 years ago
    cleveland's hustler club will have porn star jenna haze and ron jeremy for their offical grand opening this friday. a friend gave me a pass so i'm going to try to check it out. i sure hope that the hedgehog won't do a feature dance.. lol
  • LeeH
    14 years ago
    troop, you just burned out my retinas by even *suggesting* that.
  • LeeH
    14 years ago
    Seriously, though, report back on what the BFD is.
  • minnow
    14 years ago
    Lee- It is what it is, so why not use system to your advantage rather than gripe about it. DJ's usually give plenty of hype for 15-30 minutes prior to show, so why not snag desired dancer just prior to show? While they can't solicit dances during show, in most cases, they can dance in private (VIP or otherwise) area during show. Feature songs are long, so you'd be getting good value for $$.
  • samsung1
    14 years ago
    Cols Gold has feature dancers each weekend but based off recent reviews of the club they are slacking off with their feature dance shows. They are suppose to perform a show at noon on Friday along with their free lunch buffet but the feature dancer does not show up (I guess noon is too early for them lol) until later. They do have Alexis Ford booked for a feature show but I will be out of town that weekend. I enjoyed one of her movies that had her and Alexis Texas in it, I think it was called Alexis Meets Alexis. Alexis Ford is a contract girl for Adam&Eve and there is a new Adam&Eve store right next to Cols Gold.
  • potheadpl
    14 years ago
    I saw Lexi Lamour perform last Friday night. She was a lot of fun, and had a better body than 90% of the dancers. But it's not like I'm talking about Mons,either. She put on an energetic show, but she wasn't that much better than a regular stripper. Now, in October, Jesse Jane is coming to a local club. She should be worth seeing, for her hotness if nothing else. The only reason to see a feature, IMHO, is if she's famous for another reason and you want to meet her. That's it.
  • Dudester
    14 years ago
    troop, I know Ron, met him decades ago. He's actually quite pithy, and funny, when he's in the right mood. If he's not in the right mood, he can be annoying. So, I imagine that he'll be talking, perhaps to introduce Jenna. If you get a chance to talk to him, talk to him about politicians-in the respect of two faced politicians (Elliott Spitzer) who try to shut down strip clubs, but they're banging an escort on the side-even though they're married. That'll get him going. He might even try to whip up the crowd onc you tell him about the local restrictions on strip clubs.
  • shadowcat
    14 years ago
    The DJ will introduce features as Miss Nude North Dakota in 1999, has appeared in Cunt magazine and done 101 pornos. She will be an over the hill porno actress with bleached blond hair and gigantic fake tits. She will strut around and try to drum up audience participation. She will sign photos that she takes with you and maybe give out some pornos. Meanwhile, Like minnow said, I will be in the semi private couch room getting some very private, high mileage dances. I wish my favorite club had them more often, for this reason.
  • Rod8432
    14 years ago
    LeeH - I agree with you re: the featured dancers, whom I've mostly seen at Pink Pony (PP). The only exception was Jenna Haze, who I have a soft spot (well actually, a hard rod) for. She's got that little school girl thing going on, plus a smoking hot natural bod. Regarding PP, I had heard they enjoy an "erotic museum" business status in Atlanta (as do some other clubs, I think), which entitles them to feature nude entertainment and serve alcohol? I may have some details wrong, the the upshot as told to me is that they schedule the feature dancers in part to qualify for this special status. And while I agree with you that half the regular dancers in the club can dance circles around the featured dancer, I do enjoy it when my favorite dancer happens to be sitting in my lap when the feature comes on, and we just sit and cuddle while she performs.
  • shadowcat
    14 years ago
    Rod. I think that you are mistaken about "erotic Museum" status in ATL. Strip clubs in Ga are governed by local, state and federal regulations and the alcohol board seems to run things. Probably only 50% of the clubs listed for ATL are actually within the city limits but they all seem to be operating under the same rules. I have not been to a juice bar here in about 10 years and it has since closed. What I have found is that almost all of the clubs serve alcohol, are totally nude, serve food, and allow smoking. But there are only a few clubs that regularily have feature dancers. There are restrictions about zoning and contact. We all look for the clubs that are violating the contact rules. Yeah, they some times get busted. I am going to try Follies soon and since Pink Pony is only 2 1/2 miles away, I might give it a shot too.
  • gatorfan
    14 years ago
    Porn and strip clubs go hand and dick, but I think feature dancer shows make for an unnecessary, unspending crowd.
  • samsung1
    14 years ago
    I also dislike how Cols Gold will increase their cover from $5 to $12 on the weekends claiming it is to cover the cost of the feature dancer. It is especially a rip off when the feature dancer is not even there at the time you go in.
  • 10inches
    14 years ago
    used to go to PP back in the good ole days when they featured the likes of Casey James, Busty Dusty, Deena Duos etc.. i was infatuated by the really big fake tits back then. since that time, the features are fairly mediocre and certainly not a reason to go to PP
  • nikita
    14 years ago
    Christie's Cabaret chain in Cleveland, Brunswick, and Canton Ohio almost always has features on weekends. Keep in mind most of them are XXX Stars not dancers ;) we do what we do, they do what they do.
  • Notsosly
    14 years ago
    Never been to the Pink Pony. I've been to a few feature dancer nights at clubs in south FL, all for porn stars. Mostly they are very crowded and it's tough to get a dance from them (if you want one) and impossible to converse with them for more than a minute unless you are paying for it (buying a drink, tipping or getting a dance). Depending on the popularity of the feature girl in question, those lappers could be normal price, or two to three times as much... and sometimes they won't do them at all. I do remember going to one at getting 3 dances from one that was a real favorite porn star of mine. We had some fun with some mutual contact. She even offered OTC, but the price was too steep (started at $2.5k for a straight lay and steeply increased depending on the extras involved... anal, CIM/facial, etc). I'll also say that's the only time an offer like that has happened. The other lappers I've gotten from feature dancers were average/mediocre to shitty and uninspired.
  • georgmicrodong
    14 years ago
    I've seen feature dancers be effective at two things: 1. Separating dumbfucks who think they're gonna get something from their money. 2. Keeping said dumbfucks away from the rest of the girls, who are then glad of the attention.
  • potheadpl
    14 years ago
    My experience with features has been that the dancers all flock to the stage to watch the show. Lexi spent more time getting tips from girls(and getting pretty wild) than guys.
  • troop
    14 years ago
    @ lee.. if i do make it to the hustler friday i will report back and maybe do a review too. @ dude.. ya i figure ron will be mc that night. having a conversation with him should be interesting if i get the chance.
  • LeeH
    14 years ago
    minnow, read slower. * they CAN'T dance on the floor * i don't do VIP at that club I lucked out in having desired dancer with me when feature started that night. I'm too damn particular about what defines "desired". ;-)
  • harrydave
    14 years ago
    A strip club without a feature dancer is like a fish without a bicycle.
  • Player11
    14 years ago
    Allstars in Houston once had a show put on by Ginger Lee (porn star). I went to see it after paying a sizeable cover. She put on a strip show and then you could tip her on stage. You could not get dances with her. I did tip her on stage to get up close. She had a guy helping her during the show with all the props who was prob her BF / Mgr.
  • troop
    14 years ago
    it just occured to me.. around 15-17 years ago the formerly full nude crazyhorse in brookpark ohio was bringing in super big titty pornstars(?) weekly. i was a doorman/bouncer in a regular club and the manager had a big titty fetish. he talked me and another bouncer to go see this chick that was something like 48hh one night. i remember that hardly anyone payed much attention to her when she danced and afterwards. i went to drain my vein in the mens room and i saw her after her stage show sitting alone in a corner looking extremely depressed. i actually felt very sorry for her.
  • LeeH
    14 years ago
    and you just let her sit there? dude, i just lost a lot of respect for you -- about 48" worth! ;-)
  • shadowcat
    14 years ago
    What's the draw? BIG tits. I would never venture to a strip club to see a feature but last night I just happened to be in a club with a feature act. I stayed because I was bored. Well, the DJ did his thing. He read off her credits. Pornos, magazines, posters and offered instant photos with her. She was billed as the worlds largest tits and I believe it. They were humongous. It was a freak show. The dancers and customers were hooting and holloring. Every one was on their feet except me. Her name was Chelsea Charms. Her website is [view link]. She will be back at the ATL Goldrush Showbar tonight and tomorrow night. Shows at 6PM and 11PM. My philosophy is "more than a mouthful is a waste".
  • samsung1
    14 years ago
    Chelsea Charms even has her own wikipedia page. [view link] breast surgery 3 times and has special implants called polypropylene string breast implants.
  • DoctorDarby
    14 years ago
    I'm not a fan of features either. I did catch a decent Miss Nude Something or Other named Tanya Taylor recently. She did a couple of nice sets with the usual "cooter ball" (throw wadded up dollars at a cup near her crotch) and squat-to-pick-up-the fiver games. I drove 45 miniutes to see her nude at one Ohio DMC because the one 10 minutes away has no nudity. A non-nude feature is about as lame as it gets.
  • troop
    14 years ago
    i saw a miss nude america with some buddies long long ago at a long closed club in cleveland. still remember her stage name, shantee fox. the club had a stage with a runway down the middle of the room. seating was several seats deep on both sides of the runway and several seats deep off the end of the runway, like a theater. she came out dressed in a babydoll outfit with a lollipop {sucker) in her mouth and was really hot looking and beautiful. my friends and i were about 3 rows back from the end of the runway. she stripped and as she scanned the crowd she made eye contact with me and held the sucker out like she wanted to give it to me. expecting that she was going to throw it to me i held out my hand. she made a motion calling me over to get the sucker as she put it back in her mouth so i got up walked to the stage and put my hand out again. she held the sucker out then leaned over towards me as she stuck it back in her mouth and kissed it over to me. the club had a strict no hands touching rule but i reached around and grabbed her ass as she kissed the sucker to me. the place exploded in woots and applause as i turned around to walk back to my seat. there were probably 60 or more guys in that room, most of them were much closer to the stage than i was but she picked me out of the crowd and for that moment i WAS THEE MAN!!! one of the highpoints of my then young life, but the killer was that i know that i could have had her that night but i only had a couple dollars in my wallet and since i had ridden up with my friends i had no way to get back the 35 miles or so to my home if i stood behind with her and realizing that bothered me, even remembering it and writing about it bothers me on what i missed out on. oh well.. it's still a nice but bittersweet memory.
  • troop
    14 years ago
    oh.. i did make it down to the hustler club to catch ron jeremy and jenna haze about 6 hours ago. jeremy came out and basically did a stand up comedian routine for about 15 minutes then introduced jenna who danced a 4 song set as she stripped to nude. jenna looked good and i didn't stay long afterwards but jeremy walked past me within a couple feet of where i was sitting. that guy has really lived a charmed life. ok i'm not brad pitt but jeremy is one ugly mother close up! honestly, if i was a chick i think it would take a really huge ammount of money to fuck him even in a porno. he's also alot shorter than i thought and he seemed to have an attitude. a couple tried to say something to him as he walked by and he totally ignored them. i was not impressed by that guy.
  • MisterGuy
    14 years ago
    "what is the idea behind feature dancers other than to suck money from the club?" Well, I dunno that your loaded question is accurate to begin with. The theory behind having a featured dancer (especially a porn star, new or older) is that they will draw in new/more customers for the strip club. One of the first things that usually happens on feature dancer night is that the club's cover charge skyrockets (who knows if the featured dancer ever gets an actual cut of it though). I've seen it double or triple before. While I'm generally not a fan of featured dancer night, it does give one *more* opportunity to get LDs (with maybe added mileage as well) from the club's regular dancers, if one chooses to take advantage of the huge distraction that featured dancers cause. The only featured dancer that I've seen that was also worth the price of admission was Indiana Lee. She put on a great, energetic show with great audience participation. ----------------- "but the killer was that i know that i could have had her that night but i only had a couple dollars in my wallet" Ummmmm, I doubt it buddy...
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