Is it just my imagination, or is this like a pre-screening if she is thinking about doing extras? I have only been given something extra three times in all my visits to clubs, but each time, the girl asked me that before escalating. One time, specifically, the girl said 'Okay, good' after I answered her that I didn't have one.
Coincidence? Or do you think it's because they suspect you might reject it if you are in a relationship?
In my opinion, its is nothing more than an ice breaker. "Are you married"? etc.
^^^ what shadowcat said. It's just small talk. I try not to read too much into what strippers say most of the time. Actions speak louder than words.
^^^^ I doubt if it matters how you answer. It didn't stop you from coming into a strip club. Why should it stop you from.....
Agree with Shadowcat, they are only REALLY interested in how much money they can extract from you, maybe they think the married guys have less money though?
I also agree that all they care about is your money...but another way to think about it is if you have a gf then they like that because that means you are not some lonely creepy guy who will stalk them. I have noticed that when I have a girlfriend, other girls will be attracted to me who would otherwise not be if I was single.
This thread proves that we do not know and it is not important.
I always think of it as small talk. Some of the girls can't believe, or at least pretend to not believe, that I do not have a girlfriend. Anyway, one time for sure, I had a girl ask me this who then went on to do OTC with me afterward, so the dancers probably think of it as a prelude to an OTC encounter.
In clubs, I sometimes get the question, "Does your wife know you are here?" I don't remove my wedding band, so the being married part is easy to ascertain.
Saying I am a widower works, even though I am not.
I've gotten the question before... I've lied and said "no" and then gotten the response "good" and she then proceeded to get naughtier.
I've also said "yes" before too, and that usually ends up with the follow-up question "do you have kids?" If I answer that one truthfully, I then get sucked into having a conversation about her kids and her failed marriage or shithead boyfriends... and that's a conversation I really don't want to have in a SC.
In general, dancers usually don't care and respond with something like "oh you're a bad boy... I LIKE bad boys!" In which case, it really doesn't matter what you answer, because she doesn't really care and is just making conversation. However, I have gotten a few disappointed looks, and had impending freebie extras get derailed.
I've also had one girl (former ATF) get really hurt and disappointed before. I had told her I was single, we had done a lot of extras during lappers, and had some good long conversations over a span of a few weeks. She had dropped hints of seeing me outside the club before, but I never bit. She finally got the nerve to hand me her number, her real name, and flat-out asked me out to dinner and a movie. When I declined and told her I was actually in a long-term relationship, she got REAL upset and took back her name/number from my hand, and didn't speak with me for a couple weeks. But then her rent was due, and she was all for the extras again. Though she never failed to ask me if I was still dating "that girl." ...if only I had met her before I met my wife, man I could have had a lot of fun.
Agree with Shadowcat, most of the time it's only an ice breaker. What happenes after that will depend on how well you click and how much of a spender you end up being.
There are a few dancers, perhaps we mihngt call them the "couger" variety but age isn't reallya factor, that will want to know this before OTC dating. It all depends on what type of relationship they are loooking for: sex for money, or real dating and getting to know you. I've run into both. So you have to do some prognosticating when you answer this question: could this lead to something else? And your answer may very well define how far that something else goes. But regardless of that, I know from expeerience that most of the time, the married/relationship question is just a way to start talking and does indicate you've got someone who is at least interested in finding something out about you.
Depends on dancer, but generally just small talk to fill space and give you an opportunity to talk about you! :)
I should also add that the way she asks the question and the time that she asks it seems to matter.
When I mentioned the three times I have gotten extras, the girl always whispered the question in my ear or said it in a lower voice. Maybe this is just a psychological thing, like she is thinking about doing something against the rules and reflexively lowers her voice about it.
Also, they ask during the lapdance or after we have moved to the private area instead of at a table in the main floor.
Of course, a dancer asking this doesn't always mean something extra is available, but personally, I now consider it a little more than just small talk.
You never know. I think usually its an icebreaker but sometimes its to gauge what your looking for whether it be conversation extras or companionship
It might be a prelude to OTC activity. How much mileage should I give him? If he has a girlfriend than OTC might be limited, so don't invest the time, effort or mileage. If no girlfriend then OTC might be possible, so she ups the mileage. I really don't know, but that's my guess.