Random Hates at the Club
This is just a free form, stream of conscious, random list of things I hate at the club.
WHEN SERVER ASKS IF YOU WANT TO BUY A DANCER A DRINK
Ugh. This is a lose-lose moment to me. I do not mind buying a dancer a drink if it is someone I am already planning to spend money on, or if I am currently engaged and enjoying their company. But when it's a situation where you have barely started talking, or if you are about to get a dance and you aren't sure how you feel about the girl yet, it is so annoying. If you do not want to buy the dancer the drink, you have two choices. Choice 1. You buy her the drink. Which is annoying. I only bring cash to the strip club. I'm not a crazy baller. I prefer to save my money for dances and tips. Now I am out $10 or more so the stripper can have a shitty drink. And I have had strippers tell me stories about how they tell servers to bring them non-alcoholic drinks because they don't want to drink every night, so that is always on my mind, too. I just feel like a total chump after feeling pressured to buy a drink I didn't want to buy. Choice 2. Don't buy the drink. God. Now you look like a total cheapskate. It is such an awkward moment. My pride is too great. I almost always cave and buy the drink when asked. My strategy is to cut off the server and be like, "I'm okay, I don't need a drink." But some are just cutthroat and will ask, "How about for the lady?" That is the worst.
WHEN A DANCER SAYS SHE WILL FIND YOU AFTER DANCING ON STAGE AND DISAPPEARS
My most frequented club has been Babydolls in Dallas. I usually use the stages as a testing ground to find the right girl. Then I tip the girl and tell her to find me when she is done with her stages. I would say probably more than half the time, I never see the girl again. Sometimes, it's fascinating. It's not that I will see them later. Often, they just totally vanish. It's annoying and frustrating. It's also curious when I tell them I want to buy a dance from them that they make no effort to come find me. I always assume they are with a regular in VIP or something.
GIRLS WHO PUSH VIP
I can't speak for every club, but in my opinion, at a place like Babydolls, VIP is so unnecessary. You can get extremely good mileage with a regular dance. So when a dancer starts trying to hustle for VIP, I find it annoying. I don't mind her asking. That's cool. But if she keeps pushing, It is obnoxious. The other day, a girl sat in my lap and talked me up for a good 15 minutes. She was flirty and fun. I wanted a dance from her. She asked me to go VIP. I said I wasn't going to be there long enough to do VIP. I told her I was only staying another 10-15 minutes. She thought this over. And she said, "Yeah, I guess that's not enough time to do VIP." I said, "Do you only do VIP?" And she said, "Yeah. Okay, well it was nice talking to you." Got up and left. My mind was blown. She was super nice about it too. I thought she was going to be pissy for sitting in my lap and letting me rub on her ass the whole time. But she was chill. Just wasn't interested in doing a couple dances and would rather hustle for more VIP..
GIRLS WHO TRY TO HAVE DIFFERENT PRICES
I got a dance from this girl once. It was okay. Just average. She then tried to tell me her dances were $40 a dance. I told her, "I've been here before, and I have never paid that." She said, blah blah, all the girls are contract and have different rates. I may be a sucker when it comes to buying a girl a drink, but I am not going to be hustled for money I don't owe you. I told this girl, "Okay. Well. I am going to give you $20." And she tried to be all coy and was like, "Well, you could at least give me $30." I said, "Well. I am going to give you $20." She relented and said something dumb like, "Listen, I'm not going to get management involved because I don't feel like it, but fine, you can do $20 this time." I was like, "You can call management if you want. But you are only getting $20." Thankfully, that RARELY happens to me.
All that being said, Goddamn, I do love strip clubs so much.
WHEN SERVER ASKS IF YOU WANT TO BUY A DANCER A DRINK
Ugh. This is a lose-lose moment to me. I do not mind buying a dancer a drink if it is someone I am already planning to spend money on, or if I am currently engaged and enjoying their company. But when it's a situation where you have barely started talking, or if you are about to get a dance and you aren't sure how you feel about the girl yet, it is so annoying. If you do not want to buy the dancer the drink, you have two choices. Choice 1. You buy her the drink. Which is annoying. I only bring cash to the strip club. I'm not a crazy baller. I prefer to save my money for dances and tips. Now I am out $10 or more so the stripper can have a shitty drink. And I have had strippers tell me stories about how they tell servers to bring them non-alcoholic drinks because they don't want to drink every night, so that is always on my mind, too. I just feel like a total chump after feeling pressured to buy a drink I didn't want to buy. Choice 2. Don't buy the drink. God. Now you look like a total cheapskate. It is such an awkward moment. My pride is too great. I almost always cave and buy the drink when asked. My strategy is to cut off the server and be like, "I'm okay, I don't need a drink." But some are just cutthroat and will ask, "How about for the lady?" That is the worst.
WHEN A DANCER SAYS SHE WILL FIND YOU AFTER DANCING ON STAGE AND DISAPPEARS
My most frequented club has been Babydolls in Dallas. I usually use the stages as a testing ground to find the right girl. Then I tip the girl and tell her to find me when she is done with her stages. I would say probably more than half the time, I never see the girl again. Sometimes, it's fascinating. It's not that I will see them later. Often, they just totally vanish. It's annoying and frustrating. It's also curious when I tell them I want to buy a dance from them that they make no effort to come find me. I always assume they are with a regular in VIP or something.
GIRLS WHO PUSH VIP
I can't speak for every club, but in my opinion, at a place like Babydolls, VIP is so unnecessary. You can get extremely good mileage with a regular dance. So when a dancer starts trying to hustle for VIP, I find it annoying. I don't mind her asking. That's cool. But if she keeps pushing, It is obnoxious. The other day, a girl sat in my lap and talked me up for a good 15 minutes. She was flirty and fun. I wanted a dance from her. She asked me to go VIP. I said I wasn't going to be there long enough to do VIP. I told her I was only staying another 10-15 minutes. She thought this over. And she said, "Yeah, I guess that's not enough time to do VIP." I said, "Do you only do VIP?" And she said, "Yeah. Okay, well it was nice talking to you." Got up and left. My mind was blown. She was super nice about it too. I thought she was going to be pissy for sitting in my lap and letting me rub on her ass the whole time. But she was chill. Just wasn't interested in doing a couple dances and would rather hustle for more VIP..
GIRLS WHO TRY TO HAVE DIFFERENT PRICES
I got a dance from this girl once. It was okay. Just average. She then tried to tell me her dances were $40 a dance. I told her, "I've been here before, and I have never paid that." She said, blah blah, all the girls are contract and have different rates. I may be a sucker when it comes to buying a girl a drink, but I am not going to be hustled for money I don't owe you. I told this girl, "Okay. Well. I am going to give you $20." And she tried to be all coy and was like, "Well, you could at least give me $30." I said, "Well. I am going to give you $20." She relented and said something dumb like, "Listen, I'm not going to get management involved because I don't feel like it, but fine, you can do $20 this time." I was like, "You can call management if you want. But you are only getting $20." Thankfully, that RARELY happens to me.
All that being said, Goddamn, I do love strip clubs so much.
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17 comments
#2 - Dancers can get distracted by any shiny object(s) that looks like it might have money. Assuming that you don't turn her off for some reason, if you see a hot girl and want to make sure she finds you, give her a $20 and make sure she realizes it's a $20. Also, if she does happen to lose her way to you, be proactive and go looking for her. I once saw a super cute blonde getting off the stage as I was entering Little Darlings in Las Vegas. It was my first time in the club, and I made the stupid mistake of assuming she would find her way to a side stage while I found a seat. Instead she went over to talk to a couple of people, then got dressed and left. I never saw her in the club again. A few months later I saw her in More Dirty Debutantes #205, Ember.
#3 - There are girls who strictly (or primarily) spend their time whale hunting. As long as they are polite about it, like your girl, I really don't mind. I knew a girl like that at Olympic Garden who still found time to entertain me whenever I came in because I was a regular and she liked me.
#4 - In my experience these tend to be newer girls who are somewhat unprofessional. If you look like you can pay, and they are having an off night, they might try to overcharge you.
#3 -
2) Asking for a dance at the stage and then she disappears. This use to happen to me a lot at 'Desires' in Providence, RI. I learn later on this happened a lot at the club because it was a 'regular' club and the girls eventually went with their regulars and ignored me.
3) I don't mind the vip push
4) the great thing about Foxy Lady in Providence is that it's a set price at $25 a song....with a big sign saying such; which is good thing with no difficult math involved like 20 topless, 35 nude when your sort buzz and buying multiple dances. Plus you also stop potential dancers trying to rip you off by setting their own price.
SJG
Add "I charge more because I'm WORTH more" to my list, too. No, sweetie, you're not. If you want to stick to that story, prove it.
Its okay to refuse. But better if you can pick a girl you like and turn it around, rather like Mainster says.
Anything that easily gives you a chance to talk to the girl is better than buying dances.
SJG
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almost all damn night .......
That's on you - the reason clubs (staff; waitresses; dancers) get away w/ what they get away w/ is b/c many custies don't stand-up for themselves so why stop doing it if it keeps working - as PT Barnum said "there's a sucker born every minute" and strip-clubs know there are suckers/inexperienced-SCers walking thru the club's doors everyday and they are easy-prey - they know the drink-hustle makes inexperienced SCers feel uncomfortable and that is why they do it - IT'S A HUSLTE and you are allowing yourself to be hustled - in most clubs dancers don't get a cut of drinks; thus it's really not in their best interest to have you give your $$$ to the club instead of them (in some clubs dancers get commission on drinks and then they'll be pushing you to buy drinks) - if you let yourself be pushed around like that so easily that usually leads to having sub-par visits and often getting pennies on your dollar - it's your $$$ so who is best to be in charge of how to spend-it; you or the club? The club is only interested in getting your $$$ not your well-being or enjoyment, that's YOUR responsibility - the club is not gonna look out for you; it's gonna look out for itself - so YOU gotta look out for you. The "buy a lady a drink" is just a hustle to get your $$$ and you are allowing yourself to be hustled. Most dancers are not gonna turn you down for dances b/c you didn't buy them a drink - sure the stupid ones will but a dancer that gets pissed for you not buying her an overpriced drink is probably a dancer that won't give you good-service anyway. The most important word a custy needs to learn when strip-clubbing is learning how to say "no" - else you are gonna be doing what the club wants instead of what you want and that is not the way to have the best time - in short, GROW SOME BALLS - when a waitress asks "wanna buy the lady a drink" I always say no - if I wanna spend some time w/ that dancer then I'll ask her after the waitress leaves if she does want a drink; some dancers actually don't drink but they are not allowed to say no when the waitress asks.
"... WHEN A DANCER SAYS SHE WILL FIND YOU AFTER DANCING ON STAGE AND DISAPPEARS. My most frequented club has been Babydolls in Dallas. I usually use the stages as a testing ground to find the right girl. Then I tip the girl and tell her to find me when she is done with her stages. ..."
You are too-unassertive - you need to get some "strip club game" so you can stop being played so much. Strip-clubs are not a dating-site, it's BUSINESS - and in business one of the most important forces in supply-and-demand. Baby Dolls can often be more of a seller's market - it is probably the most popular club in the Dallas area and one of the most-popular nation-wide; thus as a custy one is competing w/ a lot of other custies (locals and out-of-towners) for the supply of dancers - i.e. dancers at Baby Dolls usually have a large supply of customers they can hit and the hot-ones don't have to go looking for a custy that told them to come see them - they probably already have 5 or 6 cusites lined-up already if not a regular waiting for them - the "come see me when you are done" is a weak-line - it may work in some small clubs w/ not a lot of custies or a lot of $$$ in them; but it often does not work in a large club like Baby Dolls w/ a ton of cusites many of which are willing-and-able to spend; thus you are only a face in the crowd. There's not really much you can do in this type of club although being more aggressive and having a game-plan can help-some. The Baby Dolls paradox is why often times many hard-core SCers know to hit a popular club at slower times instead of when the masses are there - one has a better chance when there is a more limited supply of custies - also - IMO you would have better success walking the floor and being proactive and trying to grab a dancer when she's free on the floor and approaching her vs the weak "come see me when you get off stage" shit which obviously does not work clubs like Baby Dolls - in a club like Baby Dolls one needs to be more assertive if one wants to get w/ the dancers they want vs w/e may come along.
As I often post on the discussion-board; strip-clubs are bizarro-world; the opposite of the real-world - too many custies can't tell the difference b/w the strip-club world and the real-world and try to use real-world logic in strip-club bizarro-world - a lot of these dancers are pure sharks and they manipulate and intimidate customers and many customers don't know what to do and often just cave into the dancers'/waitresses' demands; and these inexperienced custies don't realize they are being played/hustled big-time and don't stand-up for themselves - BOTTON LINE - we are the customers and the ones w/ the $$$ - dancers are there to accommodate us not us accommodate them and their demands - if a dancer is not treating you like you should be treated; no need to try to have a logical discussion about it w/ her; she doesn't give a fuck about logic - she knows exactly what she's doing and knows she's being a bitch b/c all she cares about is getting paid, not showing you a good-time - no need to make excuses or come to an understanding - if a dancer is not treating you right cut her off IMMEDIATELY - a spending customer should not have to put up w/ bullshit from a club or its dancers/staff - if you give them an inch they take a mile and then some - do what's best for YOU; that is what you are there for and what your are spending your $$$ for.
Waitress interrupting every song in VIP asking for a drink is an anti-extras policy by the club. You have to give her a $100 tip to go away.
Mandatory valet parking. Some Houston clubs have this. I don't want some loser driving my car, and I sure as hell don't want to pay him for it. Even worse is that they expect a tip.
That's on you - the reason clubs (staff; waitresses; dancers) get away w/ what they get away w/ is b/c many custies don't stand-up for themselves so why stop doing it if it keeps working - as PT Barnum said "there's a sucker born every minute" and strip-clubs know there are suckers/inexperienced-SCers walking thru the club's doors everyday and they are easy-prey - they know the drink-hustle makes inexperienced SCers feel uncomfortable and that is why they do it - IT'S A HUSLTE and you are allowing yourself to be hustled" ------>
At the risk of patronizing Papi -- I'm with Papi. I understand if you're in a regular bar picking up a girl, or with your date, you'll feel like a jerk and a cheapskate if you don't get her a drink. But that's not what this is -- it's a business transaction. The stripper is not confused about this, and neither is the waitress ... the only ones confused are PLs who feel like jerks when they turn down waitresses (aka the drink hustle).
I may be at a disadvantage because the way I strip club, it's a *requirement* that the stripper drink with me (I'll dismiss girls who don't drink alcohol, no matter how hot they are), so typically I'm impatiently waiting for the waitress. Still, you can use my techniques, here they are:
1. BEFORE the waitress gets there, I tell the stripper, "You'll have a drink with me? Okay, we're doing shots, your choice, vodka, tequila, whiskey". She doesn't get to order a $25 dancer drink. Hell, she doesn't get to order AT ALL -- I order the two indicated shots, and our backs, when the waitress comes.
2. If the waitress gets there before I've had time to discuss this topic with the stripper, I'll either send the waitress away (in some clubs, the stripper MUST behave in certain ways, so it's best to negotiate beforehand), or do it right there as a live fire exercise in front of the waitress ... and again, if she doesn't drink, or only does mixed drinks, I'll refuse on the spot and send the waitress away. I don't feel like a cheapskate or a jerk -- I'm there to get the experience I want, and if this stripper won't provide it, I move her on. She gets drinks from me if she's playing ball, otherwise not.
3. If I don't feel like drinking alcohol, I'll tell the stripper beforehand, "I'm not drinking right now, but I'll buy you a coke or redbull" if I don't feel like paying $ for alcohol for her.
That's that. I'm always respectful and smiling, but take control of the order (it's your fucking money) ... dealing with a waitress is NOT a high stress situation! So, now I'll admit that despite all the tough talk, I was right where you were for many years -- after a few decades of SCing, I finally get it, but don't blame anyone for being a little stressed about it.