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How to find the Ultimate Strip Club

Thursday, March 22, 2012 12:00 AM
I have been to numerous strip clubs all across the country in my life. Every single one I go to seems so different. There are ones that are a little bit bigger than a local bar and there are ones that have 4 stages and the club looks like the size of Vons! The ultimate question is what makes a me want to go back to that strip club again and actually be a regular? Is it the comfort of the place? Is it the service they have? Is it because its a big place? Is it because there are hot girls? Is it because there is one particular girl you came her to see all the time? These are some of the many questions I ask myself to determine if I was going to come back to that location again. One of the most important factors that makes a strip club "Ultimate" is how the bouncer or greeter treats you at the front door. I believe this is a very important factor... if they give you attitude when you come in, no matter how great of a time you are going to have inside... the person outside who gives you attitude will just kill your whole experience... Secondly I pay attention to the waitresses that acknowledge you when you sit down and if they pay special attention to you and your drink.. I find that great service and will tip them well for their attentiveness and friendliness. The next factor I look at is how well the girls dance on stage.. and how many girls are working that night. I always say the more the merrier.. I would rather have 40 decent looking girls than have 5 hot girls and no one else.. The temperature of the strip club is what I look at next, I don't want to be in a strip club when its freezing cold and I have to have my warm jacket on my all night, I want to be able to relax and be comfortable without being cold. I'm not a smoker myself so I do not enjoy smokes inside the club.. Next, I find that the attention dancers gives the customers.. so the more dancers that approach me, the better I feel. Next, this one is a whole lot, is when you pay for a lap dance, there is a lot of factors you look at in a dancer... There is her face, her figure, her personality, her scent, the way she moves her body, and I call it the hustlebilty. This is when I describe when a dancer negotiates $60 for the dance, and actually says no, its actually $100 at the end of the dance. That makes her a true hustler and I cannot stand that. I will most likely not return to the place because of how she tries to hustle for more money. Lastly, the cleanliness of the whole strip club is important, if i go to a strip club and there are black spots on floors, stickiness in floors, or trash everywhere, it makes it a very unpleasant place to visit. I believe an ultimate strip club would have the classiest of class and that means to not have spots, and is regularly maintained and to fix creaky chairs and bolts whenever necessary. So overall, its the the size of the club or the size of girls that makes an Ultimate strip club. A lot of factors come into play and if you are a strip club that has all the factors I listed, let me know and I will definitely pay a visit!

10 comments

  • mjx01
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    12 years ago
    blah blah blah... I can forgive a lot of things about a club. IMHO wanting to be a regular is 90% about there being one or more dancers there that I like. If there are not dancer at a club I 'get along with,' then all other factors are purely academic. Many of the other things you mention (especially smoking) can be deal breakers in spite of good talent, but talent is #1.
  • JacksonEsskay
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    12 years ago
    Red: You make many valid points, but if the talent is onstage is not to m liking, all the creature comforts you describe will not bring me back to the club. Case in point, there is a club in Richmond that I find to be among the best so far as its physical layout, lighting, etc. and the support staff has much of the attributes you describe . . . but the dancers really started going downhill and that caused me to stop going.
  • FinalLap
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    12 years ago
    The bottom line for me is this: the HOTTEST Dancers & the BEST Deals. Basic good atmosphere & cleanliness is important. But as long as it's not a problem, then the girls and the pricing drive the decision on how long to stay, how much money to spend, and whether to return. It's just not that complicated!!!
  • Tiredtraveler
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    12 years ago
    The number one is the dancers looks and attitude. I have been crappy clubs with fair looking girls but the girls have a customer first attutude and the club is packed. I have also been in clubs nice inside (PT's in INdy) that had great looking spinners but were cold as ice and there was no one staying in the club. Most were young and bitchy. It is a delicate balance. Safety and attutude are the most important. Scarlett's in Toledo used to be a fun club that was nice inside had fairly good looking girls with a fun attitude and no extras but was a good place to go. Now it has nice looking girls with bad attitude and is empty. If I want to sit and watch models on stage and not interact it is cheaper to sit at home and watch Playboy channel in HD on the big screen TV.
  • gsv
    •
    12 years ago
    For me I generally look for a nice balance between quality of dancers (which is combination of looks, personality) and mileage. That doesn't necessarily mean extras but at least good lap dances with proper contact. Then there's clubs that just totally deliver an outrageous value such as those in TJ, and I'd say Hong Kong in TJ is probably the 'ultimate' strip club in North America, even with the annoying waiters and some of the other downfalls.
  • JuiceBox69
    •
    12 years ago
    I look to see if I can get otc or itc that is my factor
  • rickdugan
    •
    12 years ago
    This article should be entitled, "how to worry about all the wrong things in a strip club."
  • Drumlover1974
    •
    12 years ago
    When I am put first I usually have an awesome time. Sometimes I am treated like royalty by average looking girls and I have the best time compared to staring at 10's who ignore me.
  • Dudenextdoorfl
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    12 years ago
    Once I find many attractive dancers with extras within ny budget that's my ultimate club. Till it gets ruined. The sale of a SC, problems with law, quality of girls dropping or any other reason might turn a great club into a bad club. The club in new England I repeated so many times. Sometimes every day of the week. Some days day and night visits. The quality of dancers bottom out and I don't go there no more. The club in FL I used to go as a regular, gone into legal issues and all extras and nudity stopped. Hot girls left and it turned into any other titty bar. My favourite club in Atlanta is still going strong. I try to as much as possible. Inknow these days will end one day. It might be tomorrow or 1 year from now. All good things end. The way I look at it, better enjoy it till it lasts!
  • Cornball357
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    12 years ago
    See the lodge in Dallas tx, or rhino in van nuys... Two very different but in my opinion the ultimate in strip clubs...post if you've been to,either...
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