Rules for Lending Money to a Stripper

avatar for wasted
wasted
Florida
<p>
I came up with these rules I think are helpful for anyone thinking about lending a stripper money.<br />
<br />
Rule #1: Never lend money to a stripper. No exceptions.<br />
<br />
Rule #2: Okay so you&rsquo;re breaking rule #1. Never lend a stripper more money than you can afford to give her outright. When you &ldquo;lend&rdquo; money to a stripper the likelihood you will never see it again is very high. If you&rsquo;re stupid enough to break rule #1 you must follow Rule #2 or risk financial ruin.<br />
<br />
Rule #3: Never lend her more money than she can expect to get from you in a couple of visits to the club. This rule is possible because if you&rsquo;re lending her money in the first place you&rsquo;ve probably been a frequent visitor and good customer because she has you by the balls. She&rsquo;s already got you hooked and coming back regularly. Your value to her as a customer must always be higher to her than the value of the loan. She&rsquo;ll take repaying the loan seriously if she&rsquo;s worried about losing something more valuable. You don&rsquo;t lend a girl $2000 when you&rsquo;ve been spending $150 per visit on her, for example. And don&rsquo;t worry, if she begs you for $1000 and you only lend her $500 everything else here will work just fine. It&rsquo;s not like she&rsquo;ll say no to the lesser amount of money.<br />
<br />
Rule #4: This one is hard and you&rsquo;re going to feel as inclined to break it as rule #1. When you lend her the money you make it clear to her that as much as you like her you want her to take the loan seriously. In order for her to take the loan seriously you aren&rsquo;t going to dance with her anymore until she&rsquo;s repaid the loan. You&rsquo;ve got to have willpower for this one. Up to this point you&rsquo;ve thought you were special to her, and you were thinking with your dick so much you actually loaned a stripper money! But if you followed rule #3 and you also follow this rule her little stripper brain starts doing math in her head and she realizes that not repaying the loan is a bad idea.<br />
<br />
Rule #5: Don&rsquo;t believe the lies and bullshit that comes out of the mouth of a stripper. If you can&rsquo;t distinguish stripper lies from reality reread Rule #1 and stick with that. You lent her money once, she will come back for more. You&rsquo;ve told her you won&rsquo;t get any more dances until she repays the money, she begs you and tries to seduce you back. You will feel your will weakening and you will have trouble distinguishing stripper shit from reality.<br />
<br />
Just remember YOU work hard for YOUR money. YOU don&rsquo;t owe her YOUR money. She doesn&rsquo;t have a right to YOUR lap dance money and she doesn&rsquo;t have the right to a loan from YOU.<br />
<br />
Rule #6: Get lap dances with other strippers. Let&rsquo;s face it, you got too attached to this stripper in the first place. You stopped treating her like the lying, disposable, prostitute that she really is. You got so attached to this one stripper that you were stupid enough to break Rule #1. Dances with other lying, disposable, prostitutes will help you break your attachment to the girl you lent money to. It&rsquo;s therapy.<br />
<br />
Also if you visit the club a couple of times and make it clear to her that you still favor her, but the other girls will get your money because of the loan, it will start to reinforce the lesson of Rule #4. By risking your money you may finally be taking back some power here. Every time you have the courage and strength to tell her &ldquo;NO&rdquo; while telling some other stripper &ldquo;YES&rdquo; your balls will grow back a little.<br />
<br />
Rule #7: Do not accept reduced price lap dances as repayment. I know this is hard too because you liked her lap dances in the first place. But you&rsquo;ve got to remember reduced price ANYTHING is still putting money in her pocket while she&rsquo;s allegedly paying you back. Make it clear you want MONEY back because that&rsquo;s exactly what you lent her. Unless she&rsquo;s got something better than money to trade. Which brings us to&hellip;<br />
<br />
Rule #8: Even if you&rsquo;ve done everything right up to this point the likelihood the stripper will repay you is still low. She&rsquo;s begging and desperate and you&rsquo;ve found the courage to follow all of the rules (except for #1 which is the only really good advice I have). Now you make it clear to her, you lent her money because she&rsquo;s more than just a stripper to you. You lent her the money because you CARE. But you won&rsquo;t allow yourself to be walked all over. At this point the stripper starts looking to make a trade, and it becomes clear that all strippers are essentially prostitutes. The reality is that to a stripper sex is pretty much the same thing as money.<br />
<br />
Just a little aside here: All strippers are prostitutes. The only people who don&rsquo;t believe strippers are prostitutes are delusional women earning a living as strippers. The stripper who makes her money giving blowjobs in the club calls the other girls whores because they have intercourse. The girl who makes money giving hand jobs calls the girl who gives blowjobs a whore. The girl who gives nude lap dances where the customers touch her calls the girl who gives hand jobs a whore. The girl who gives topless lap dances calls the girl who gives nude dances a whore. It keeps going down the line. The reality is that A WOMAN WHO GIVES SEXUAL GRATIFICATION FOR MONEY IS A PROSTITUTE. It&rsquo;s just a matter of how high the level of customer satisfaction.<br />
<br />
If you&rsquo;ve done everything right up to here you&rsquo;ve steered a woman who needs your money into a corner. She doesn&rsquo;t want to give your money back. You aren&rsquo;t buying lap dances from her anymore. What comes next?<br />
<br />
It&rsquo;s a natural progression for her to move up the ladder of customer satisfaction towards sex. And to be honest that&rsquo;s what you always wanted anyway, right? If your sexual gratification wasn&rsquo;t more important to you than money you wouldn&rsquo;t have walked into the strip club in the first place. If she was giving you everything you wanted to begin with you wouldn&rsquo;t have been stupid enough to break Rule #1. You went into this process a horny loser. You now have the opportunity to become a horny loser who&rsquo;s finally getting to have sex with that hot stripper who owes him money.<br />
<br />
Rule #9: Knowledge is power. As you come to the realization that you are a sex addict and all strippers are prostitutes most of these rules will start to fall away.<br />
<br />
You may lend a stripper money without getting any sex and without getting your money back. You will feel burned and used. You will wonder why you lent her the money. She wasn&rsquo;t special; there are other girls in the club. Were you going to turn that ho into a housewife? Was it really that important for you to be liked by this woman who abused your trust? Refer back to Rule #1 the next time a stripper asks you for a loan.<br />
<br />
You may follow all these rules and see results. When you find success you will think to yourself &ldquo;wait a minute. If when she first asks me for a loan I just proposition her like a prostitute in exchange for the money, I can skip all these steps.&rdquo; You realize that if she was that sweet stripper (prostitute) with a heart of gold she wouldn&rsquo;t be hustling a virtual stranger for a loan in the first place. You realize that lending a stripper money is only valuable when you&rsquo;re getting something more valuable back in return. You realize that every conversation you have with a stripper is just an ongoing negotiation with a prostitute and you should be constantly protecting yourself while trying to maintain control of the situation. Your heart will turn black and cold. And the next time a stripper asks you for a loan you will follow Rule #1.<br />
&nbsp;</p>

46 comments

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avatar for volsfan0911
volsfan0911
13 years ago
I'd skip the other 499 words and just focus on one. NO! You're paying for drugs, an abortion, her pimp, her kid or to get a loan shark off her ass so she can come back to work. Doesn't matter - it's going to be bad news anyway and you'll never get any money back. Suggestion. Just offer her the opportunity to work OTC and bang you for $xxx amount of money. That way she can be a straight up whore and it's just a much cleaner business model. She needs money, fucks you for whatever amount she needs and everyone understands up front. No hurt feelings that way.
avatar for Rod8432
Rod8432
13 years ago
Well written, wasted. I think I'll stick with Rule #1 (which, by the way, applies to friends and family members, too).
avatar for Stiletto25
Stiletto25
13 years ago
I think this is a funny article. It's very entertaining. I do think a lot of the men and women on this site are smart (with the exception of juicebox69 :) :)
and know that "lending" money that you can't afford to lose isn't a good idea.
Also the "lending" issue doesn't just fall on strippers. Best friends, lovers, etc have severed ties over money. I don't think Ive ever payed my poor parents back for all the money they've "lent" me in my younger years.
Sounds like you had a bad experience Wasted, and I'm sorry for that. I'm usually a fair and balanced person on this site so I don't feel too bad about saying "this article is full of bullshit".
One line would have done it. Don't lend money!! In general..

Thank you, you've been a great audience. Now I've gotta get back to work.
avatar for now_starring
now_starring
13 years ago
I do think the article was entertaining, but my rule is don't lend/give/spend money if it is enough to cause you financial issues.
avatar for steve229
steve229
13 years ago
So just how much did you lend her?
avatar for rh48hr
rh48hr
13 years ago
All that was needed was rule #1. And as volsfan said you might as well get OTC so you get bang for your buck (no pun intended). But if you lend money to strippers, family or friends, don't ask to be repaid, then you won't have the bitterness and anger of not being repaid.
avatar for biggb011
biggb011
13 years ago
I agree with everyone else. sounds like you broke your own #1 rule and are now pissed off and venting about it. It'll be ok, happens to the best of us. If it makes you feel any betr I just lost over 6 figures. wasnt to a stripper but either way you just gotta get over it.
avatar for wasted
wasted
13 years ago
How much did I lend her? I lent her enough to make me want to come on here and vent a couple dozen paragraphs. The article is a bunch of garbage (except all strippers really are prostitutes), but I feel better now.

I've said no to strippers who ALLEGEDLY needed money to save their car, avoid eviction, pay court fees to stay out of jail. One girl said she needed a couple hundred more dollars to be able to bury her own mother. I told them all NO.

I don't know how this most recent girl got to me...
avatar for brewerfan
brewerfan
13 years ago
I think that this was a well-written article, but I definitely will stick to rule #1. I also agree with Rod when he wrote that it also applies to family, friends, etc. I don't go to clubs in hopes of a "real" relationship with a "real" girl, I go to them for the dances from beautiful women. I spend enough money in clubs as is, and I believe that the girls should just appreciate that. So, to loan a girl money for God knows what, in hopes that she will pay you back is crazy. What do you really know about her? She gives excellent LDs and she's hot isn't enough info of her to give her money you'll probably not see again. Also, why does she need money from you for? Doesn't she make a shit load to begin with dancing? I thought they did; otherwise, why do they put themselves through that line of business.
avatar for spandexman
spandexman
13 years ago
Just treat the girls the way you teat the roto rooter that comes to youse once in a lifetime. Pay them only for services given. remember a lot of thes girls are pulling in $500.00 a night and make more than most of us do in a day/
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
13 years ago
I loaned a stripper $5.00 once so she could make her tip out. I never saw it again, so I learned my lesson.
avatar for troop
troop
13 years ago
after reading rule #1 i started to read rule#2 then stopped and glanced at the rest but i didn't and won't take the time to read it because the only rule that means anything is #1.
avatar for Stiletto25
Stiletto25
13 years ago
Oh Wasted, not ALL strippers are prostitutes. Many of us do it for free
avatar for gsv
gsv
13 years ago
@shadowcat - $5? honestly, that's such a negligible amount (especially in the context of a strip club) that I could see myself giving that as a tip.
avatar for JuiceBox69
JuiceBox69
13 years ago
Sounds like code talk for sum otc ! Thanks for the plug stileto25 : )
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
13 years ago
This article is crap. There should be no rules for this as nobody in his right mind would ever lend money to a stripper.

As with many around here, I've been doing this for a long time and have probably heard just about every sob story out there. The most recent one involved a girl who supposedly needed diapers and formula that night, but of course would pay me back the next day. ;) I told her no, but if she really needed it that bad then she could earn it. After all, there were far better uses for her mouth than promises she would never keep and the inevitable lies and excuses soon to follow.
avatar for Contango6
Contango6
13 years ago
The problem is "You stopped treating her like the lying, disposable, prostitute that she really is."
Jack Torrance: Words of wisdom, Lloyd, my man. Words of wisdom.
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
13 years ago
gsv: Sheesh...satire.
avatar for gsv
gsv
13 years ago
@shadowcat. my bad.

I agree with rickdugan's comments though. If they want money badly, might as well take advantage of that opportunity there and see what they're willing to do for you.
avatar for quicknight
quicknight
13 years ago
wasted, i think you have a future in journalism. if you'd submitted this to maxim or hustler, you probably could've made your money back! lol

at any rate, i enjoyed the article. thanks for the advice!
avatar for boatmonkey
boatmonkey
13 years ago
I have never lent a stripper money but I havs "pre-paid" for dances with my favorite and I was never disappointed in the return. She has always made sure I got back the sessions I paid for and we have a better relationship because I helped her out a little at a couple tough month-ends when all the bills are due.
avatar for ohioman
ohioman
13 years ago
The initial posting was written tongue in cheek, but it's more truth than fiction. Been there, done that, and learned my lesson the hard way. We've got dicks and brains, and to operate correctly they both need a supply of blook. Unfortunately, our bodies have only enough blood to meet the needs of one of those organs at a time.
avatar for kumasdaisy
kumasdaisy
13 years ago
Lame article. Neither a borrower nor a lender be.

Also, what the fuck? Referring to human beings as disposable? It sounds like you got screwed over by a dancer and now you're just mad.

avatar for tcp
tcp
13 years ago
I have a sure fire response. I have been hit up frequently for "loans" at some of the sc's I frequent and I never even consider a loan for more than $200,Why? they ask, and here is my response.

I always tell them I only loan to good friends. I ask them "Do you want to be my friend?" Of course some move on but a few tell they swear they want to be my friend, If that is the case I will tell them this:

I tell them they can be my friend and get my $200 if they have sex with me. If they keep the @200 I will not ask for it back and they can consider it payment for services. If they pay me back, then they are my Fuckin' good friend and can come to me anytime for a loan..

Believe it or not it's worked about 4 times with two repeaters...
avatar for motorhead
motorhead
13 years ago
Wow. Nicely written, but it took a page to say it. LOL!

Don't LOAN money. Either just give them money with no strings attached or exchange money for services rendered. It's as easy as that.
avatar for not2bad
not2bad
13 years ago
What if you already fucked her twice with no rubber?
avatar for Contango6
Contango6
13 years ago
A disposable human being? Of course not; at least not literally. It's just a helpful point of view when dealing with a prostitute. I treated my last ATF like a lady who was deserving of respect. I guess she figured I was weak and she repaid my kindness by treating me like shit in true Borderline fashion! So I moved on. Guess who is now texting whom about getting together again? (Here is a clue: Given her circumstances the income she got from me is not easily replaced while i am freely spending it on someone else.) The irony is we would probably be seeing each other (and her income would be intact!) if I had treated her the same way she treated me (as disposable) instead of adhering to some altruistic principal that all human beings are deserving of respect even when they are not. I think she would have understood that. Sure you can dumb this down and accuse me and the OP of just being mad because we got screwed over. I plead guilty as charged! But I think its way more complicated.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
13 years ago
I learned my lesson too. However I still believe I made money off of one dancer compared to what I would have spent on her. She was already giving me a good price on dances and for a loan of $100, she agreed to give me lap dances for half off all the time for forever. She said forever. I believe she thought forever meant as long as we were both going to the strip club so in dancer terms she probably thought that wouldn't be that long. 2 years later, she told me she more than paid back that loan and she wasn't going to give me half off anymore.
Overall, it's a bad idea to loan money. I completely agree. Now if they have a repayment plan already figured out,that may work out. It would be pot luck if it works out for you. With one girl, I loaned her money, she disappeared from the strip club. I knew the money was a lost cause. I found her at another strip club a few months later. She avoided me acting like I could be like some kind of hit man. I could tell she was real nervous. I had forgotten about the loan. I never recalled a dancer being so afraid of me before. I believe I loaned her $100 at one time. Yes that was stupid. I got talked into it being new to strip clubs and this web site was not not around that I knew of.
avatar for mo_youngblood
mo_youngblood
13 years ago
I, like many have said, would not loan money, but would pay a reasonable price for services rendered (dances or whatever else they want to negotiate). What is wrong with working for your money?
avatar for Gossage54
Gossage54
13 years ago
I didn't read much more than a few words of this. I would never lend money to a stripper unless I knew her for years and somehow established a real relationship where I could trust her but that rarely happens. Just make an arrangement to do some TO and compensate her handsomely.
avatar for kumasdaisy
kumasdaisy
13 years ago
Contango, you sound like a total sociopath. It sounds as though if you and this woman had established mutual respect from the start, as in any other business transaction, any problems might have been avoided.
avatar for Contango6
Contango6
13 years ago
Daisy, What you suggest is what I did. I found the approach does not work with Borderline females, many of whom are employed as sex workers. I am happy I got out when I did with my wallet and everything else in tact.
avatar for rell
rell
13 years ago
no need to go past rule #1.. once you have broken that rule really no need to go further its a lost cause
avatar for Antney89
Antney89
13 years ago
You referred to all strippers as 'Lying Disposable Prostitutes'
Sounds to me like deep down inside you don't like them at all as a class of people.
If you are going to go that far as to place them ALL into that category, I would take it a step further and say that virtually EVERYONE has a price. I'm sure for a few hundred thou YOU YOURSELF would fuck just about anyone who was put in front of you.
Everyone lies, the only question is 'about what'.
If you don't have money to give, don't lend any. If a girl asks you for a loan, tell her you don't have it. She won't hate you for saying that and you won't impress her by offering it. Believe it or not, strippers aren't impressed by how much money you have. Why do you think they are often involved with some guy who has no real job?
I have dated more strippers than I can remember and it was NEVER because of how much money I had, or offered, I was that dude playing pool in the back that they hung out and talked to after they got everyone elses money.
avatar for LeeH
LeeH
13 years ago
rickdugan: "This article is crap. There should be no rules for this as nobody in his right mind would ever lend money to a stripper."

Rick, welcome to Iggyland. Maybe you and Dougster can cuddle up.
avatar for LeeH
LeeH
13 years ago
wasted, good article. As many have said, #1 should be enough, but it often isn't. Until they learn the hard way, additional rules are helpful.
avatar for steve229
steve229
13 years ago
"I was that dude playing pool in the back that they hung out and talked to after they got everyone elses money."

The grungy jobless deadbeat? Yeah, we all know that dude, lol.
avatar for chukko
chukko
13 years ago
If a girl asked for a loan and I wanted to help her out. I would just ask for a lump sum of dances or something. If she declines then that just means that she doesn't like to work hard for her money even when an opportunity is obviously present. I probably wouldn't help her pay for more than 100 dollars because I'd get worn or bored after so many dances.
avatar for wasted
wasted
13 years ago
To the critics of the term "lying, disposable, prostitute": Just because I think they're lying, disposable, prostitutes doesn't mean I don't like them. I actually like them alot. I just think it's important to see them for what they are.

As PEOPLE they aren't disposable. We're all God's chidren, blah, blah, blah...

As a customer in the strip club setting when I say "disposable" I mean they're so replacable and interchangable that it makes more sense to discard them after use than to become attached to them. It's safe to assume any stripper you meet in a club is trying to use her sexuality to get her hands on your money and every word coming out of her mouth is a lie. Does that sound nicer than calling them disposable?

The article is tongue in cheek. DON'T LOAN A STRIPPER MONEY!
avatar for Polarman
Polarman
13 years ago
As an additional point, even if you loan money to a stripper, it will never solve their problem. They are a black hole when it comes to money. They spend it faster than they get it and because they are irresponsible, they spend it on BS. The ones that are responsible never need to borrow they earn it through dick grinding.
avatar for kcm
kcm
13 years ago
Really!?! Strippers aren't prostitutes. You obviously got played and now you are so sick about it that you have to start calling names to make yourself look better. You do need therapy, that's why you came to us. That's why we get paid so much. We have to listen to your whining and crying about how your wife doesn't want to fuck you anymore. Take a look in the mirror and you will realize why. Don't blame us for your inadequacies.
avatar for dugo50
dugo50
13 years ago
Well, I probably shouldn't even add this, since everyone's mind ( or whatever passes for same) is already made up. I have violated The Rule twice. Unfortunately for everyone's preconceived judgements the stripper in question paid me back. Twice. And in a timely fashion. And I expected no more or less. She was (and is) a decent person and even a friend and I'm glad I was able to help her out.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
13 years ago
"The article is tongue in cheek..."

Whoops - I obviously didn't pick that up from the original post. Then I take back the "article is crap" comment, but will add that the tongue in cheek nature of it was probably a little too subtle for easy pickup.

Lee, if you don't like my opinions then feel free to ignore away - I'll try not to lie awake worrying about it. ;)

avatar for flguytampa21
flguytampa21
13 years ago
It has probably been said. But never fall in love with one stripper. Treat them like they treat you. Once you have danced with them and paid them. Most of them have moved on to their next customer. Make sure you move on and have another favorite.
avatar for Player11
Player11
13 years ago
Great article. It should be required reading for any man contemplating going to a SC or buying a VIP memebership sort of like the realease sky divers have to sign.

A good hustler, ROB can put a man under a spell where he will do irrational things like hand over big money (like $400) to her like in a trance and get absolutely nothing in return. The sad thing she will use that money to take her BF somewhere for a romantic weekend getaway. She even had the gall to tell the guy that and her excuse for not meeting him at motel (after he paid $67 for the room) was an old boyfriend had come from out of town to take her to dinner.

Obey rule #1 - Never, ever lend (or donate) money to them. If they hit on you with some sad story they are about to be evicted and need $ make them an offer for the itc or otc sex service of your choice. If they wont take it walk away as it is probably a lie anyhow. If the dollar amount is larger than what you would pay for a session, then offer them x sessions at x Dollars.

All strippers are sex workers, but there are varying degrees - many will play - itc / otc extras. Your goal as a Strip Clubber is to get the best bang for your buck.
avatar for SexyAlissa
SexyAlissa
13 years ago
mmm... bitter much!
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