Dancers asking if you are married

25 comments

• Clubber

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  15 years ago

  Some even ask me when they could easily see my ring. Perhaps they think they could catch me in a lie, use for blackmail, who knows what, why, or cares.
• shadowcat

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  15 years ago

  I think that it is nothing more than an ice breaker. There could be some that think that single guys are hornier and therefor might be bigger spenders. I have been told that some dancers, who are not married, wear rings to discourage guys from hitting on them.
• imnumnutz

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  15 years ago

  agree with s-cat. Never felt it was anything more than dancer trying to keep conversation going, hoping it would lead to dance.
• Ironcat

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  15 years ago

  I agree that many dancers lack conversational skills and resort to what I call the "interview" technique. Since I live in the city of my favorite club, I don't want to share my demographics with a stranger, especially because I am married and have a career. So I make up personal stuff. After all, it's not as if it makes any difference to the dancer - she is just trying to separate me from my cash.
• arbeeguy

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  15 years ago

  While I agree with all the above writers, I do think that some dancers will use a different sales strategy for married men than for single men. She may know you are married, but still ask you if you are married, to initiate the strategy. It is interesting to speculate on how the strategy might differ. For example, if you are married, it would be a bit tougher for her (not impossible, just tougher) for her to do OTC or establish any kind of a one-on-one relationship, than if you are single. There might be other differences which would manifest themselves Inside The Club (ITC) I any event, it really doesn't matter. As previous writers have indicated, you are there to provide the cash, and she is there to provide the tits, the ass, the friendly smile, and maybe a hand wrapped around your prick, etc., etc.
• SuperDude

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  15 years ago

  Sometimes it's just an awkward conversation starter and sometimes it's an effort to calculate how much money the target customer might have to spend. Young single guys are cheap. Older single guys have extra cash. Married men have to be careful with cash. And so it goes.
• casualguy

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  15 years ago

  Some dancers will start questioning you on why you aren't married. One drunk girl in a regular bar keep pestering me telling me I must be married so I told her I was so she would leave. She didn't take no for an answer. I think next time a girl won't take no for an answer I might ask a question where I expect her to say no. That is if she looks decent to good looking.
• DandyDan

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  15 years ago

  I just hate that. I don't know what difference it would make. The only thing I've ever experienced is the question about why I'm not married when I am so attractive. I suppose it is some sort of technique, but I'm not sure what's supposed to be gained from it.
• jablake

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  15 years ago

  If you think the dancer is just interested in your cash, then you're selling yourself short; perhaps! :) The dollar is my master, but surprising how untrue that is for some people. I bought this old American junk vehicle and spent significant (for me) sums to fix it. Anyway, a young man from Advanced Discount Auto LOVES American made cars especially the muscle cars so I gave it to him. He has been working like a nut (he was severely wounded twice in Iraq so either he was brainwashed, born that way, etc.) trying to make it like new. Very impressed with how things are looking, but he has offered me the car back! I said after all the time and money you've wasted so far? He says it is just a real pleasure to help out and giving away a whole car is too generous. I told him that whether he believes it or not, I will have the American junk vehicle towed to the dump if he don't take it. He says he will take it with pride and that it isn't junk--It is AWESOME. Definitely a nut job. :( The point is I've met plenty of strippers with the same mentality as this young guy. Just wants to serve and be helpful. The key? He and the other goody 2 shoes are broke! The only thing that I don't like about him is that he served in the U.S. military, but then no one is perfect and besides I have known many outstanding veterans.
• Clubber

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  15 years ago

  "The only thing that I don't like about him is that he served in the U.S. military... I have to assume you are joking, or just a ignorant historical idiot!
• jablake

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  15 years ago

  Not joking in the least Clubber. I be thinking you might be ignorant concerning the War Between the States. Anyway, it ain't about history. It is about BS like the soldiers are fighting for our freedoms---what a sick pathetic joke. And, you don't have to be opposed to the U.S. military to feel that way.
• Clubber

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  15 years ago

  We have our freedoms because they DID fight for our freedom! And now, for our lives. I DO believe there are those in this world that would love nothing more than to kill Americans, and they DO this. If you do not believe that, you do not listen to them or are just plain, whatever!
• jablake

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  15 years ago

  Wonderful for you if you think you're free or that they're killings for the government increased or protected your freedoms. That 5-4 decision from the Supreme Court should have opened your eyes a little. And, those boys and girls who wish to kill Americans it is because they're jealous of our alleged freedoms? Gee, is it possible the government gave billions in weapons and aid to their enemies? Is that at all possible? You know that this nit wit government may have put Americans at significant risk due to their love of meddling and choosing sides? I think you'd be loving America regardless of how little freedom you have or what system of control is in place. My neighbor whose English is extremely weak--I translate for him---was chosen as a juror and the government knew he couldn't speak English. When I complained to his wife about him serving as a juror, she said why he will make a fine juror. I said the trial is being held in English. She said doesn't the government know he doesn't understand English? I said they know and definitely approve. He voted guilty, but said he didn't care one way or the other because he couldn't understand what was being said---he just wanted to get back to work. He wasn't the only non-English speaking juror---go ahead and love this filth that is what I'd expect of a typical American. The government is a massive fraud and it ain't limited to giving away a few trillion dollars of funny money or passing special laws for lobbyists. You think that is freedom? Well, then enjoy. :) To me the typical soldier will accept whatever nonsense the government happens to spout at the moment and is mainly capable of merely flag waving mentality.
• jablake

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  15 years ago

  "'I think it would be just faster if they just shot me in the head. You know what I mean? How much more can he disenfranchise all of us? President Obama, why don't you just set us on fire?' -- Glenn Beck" Glenn Beck is the type of American, imo, who could be wearing chains and he yappity yaps about how the wonderful U.S. soldier died for all his freedoms. What freedoms? The government's chains of course! His next wonderful freedom will be to have the government set him of fire! If he survives, then he'll have the freedom to wave an American flag, which is even better probably in his mind than the chains and fire. :)
• Clubber

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  15 years ago

  Well, some,if not most of us, do not propose anarchy, which seems to be your idea of "freedom". In any case, I broke a rule of mine and posted to a non-SC topic. I shall refrain and again follow my self imposed loss of "freedom".
• jablake

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  15 years ago

  So now freedom is anarchy? :) How convenient. Let the government give you a jury trial with non-English speaking jurors and then let me hear you yelp about all your alleged freedoms. It would be especially ironic if the nit wit government was trying you on a gun charge. You know how much weight the joke of a Second Amendment carries with this regime and past regimes. As far as I'm concerned the government can take all the weapons out private hands because gee giving people the right to bear arms is "anarchy." lol :) Drink a beer? Yep, must be "anarchy" cause government knows best.
• jablake

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  15 years ago

  Anyway, back to my original stripclub point. This very nice young man who unfortunately, imo, is a U.S. veteran didn't want money. He wants to help and to serve. After sustaining severe injuries from a grenade does he get smart? No, he wants to help and serve his military buddies so he goes back to collect a bullet. His mindset is helping other people. He has helped me and I tried to pay him for his time and work and he is just stubborn when it came to accepting money for his hard work. Well, I *hate* this American made junker and figured since he likes American made and he loves to work on cars it makes a perfect thank you gift. Besides, I know he doesn't want me to send it the junk yard, which I most certainly will do. Anyway, now after the junker is starting to look good he wants to give it back! That is like the strippers that I know. No respect for the dollar. Some of these strippers not only do they wish to help and serve, but believe it or not they're also flag wavers! I'd like to set my Rambo veteran up with one of these hot strippers that shares his values at least as it concerns flag waving and helping and serving, but due to health and financial problems I haven't been to the clubs. :( So at least the broke strippers that I knew didn't have a focus on cash. Believe so in all cases and I think the customer is doing himself a disservice and might even be selling himself short. These flag waving strippers probably would go orgasmic over this young U.S. veteran due to his service and past injuries.
• gk

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  15 years ago

  Jablake, the government isn't a massive fraud, it's just too big, with too many bureaucrats And it's too big because too many voters fall for all the pandering that politicians do. Got a problem--let the government fix it. Let the government be your nanny, your doctor, your whatever. We need a limited government to to do a few things well, but we have a giant government that does a mediocre job of everything it attempts. Also, be careful about demeaning the military. It's a big world and there's room for everybody. Just because you don't fit with the military doesn't mean there's not a place for it. The military does the best it can--given the fact that it is led, ultimately, by the aforementioned government and politicians. Don't forget, the military protects your right to be cynical without harrassment by outsiders (other than riled up TUSCLers). Sorry-had to rant on this. Let's get back to strip clubs.
• jablake

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  15 years ago

  Hi gk, I got a stripper out of jail with the extraordinary help of a public defender. I thought the judge was going to hold the public defender in contempt of court. The other cases typically seemed to be handled in under a minute usually to the detriment of the defendant. Away the stripper was so confident that she would get her day in court in front of a jury. I explained that there was NO WAY she was going to be allowed a jury trial and the government would just drag her until she accepted a plea deal. The stripper is all I'm an American and I have rights, blah, blah, blah. BTW, this stripper is pro-government and might still be after she forgets the way she treated. She also claimed it was her right as an American to have a speedy trial. I just laughed and said you don't have any rights---period. She be making a lot of noise how she is going to show me and that America is the greatest. I roll my eyes a few times and shake my head in disgust and finally said that I hope you're right and I'm not. Unfortunately, I was right. The stripper? Filled with hate, but only temporary----give her 6 months and she be proudly yapping about all her alleged rights of being an American. She will forget all the abuse and lies by the government. I will give her first judge credit for 1) letting her out and 2) actually starting to side with the stripper. BTW, being a stripper generally doesn't help if you get before a judge and probably the same goes before a jury.
• Notsosly

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  15 years ago

  Before this thread got completely derailed by some whacky disestablishmentarianism rhetoric, we were talking about strippers asking if you were married, and whether we minded or not. Personally, I know in many cases it's just making conversation, but I think in many cases it can also be part of the stripper "sizing you up" to see how much $$$ you might part with. I am not a fan, because if I tell the girl I am married (I am) then we might end up talking about her (ex)husband and/or my wife, and/or children... topics which I absolutely do NOT want to talk about. I feel it's easier to leave the ring in the car, and just go single. But unfortunately, that has resulted in being asked to meet OTC for dates/dinners/movies/etc., which then opens up a whole other can of worms when I have to decline. Also, when I say I'm single, I sometimes get the response "Good! I don't give married guys lapdances." It could be just part of the sales script, or it could be true! Either way, I'm single in the clubs. Always.
• jablake

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  15 years ago

  "Before this thread got completely derailed by some whacky disestablishmentarianism rhetoric . . . " "disestablishmentarian –noun 1. a person who favors the separation of church and state, esp. the withdrawal of special rights, status, and support granted an established church by a state; an advocate of disestablishing a state church. –adjective 2. of, pertaining to, or favoring the disestablishment of a state church. Origin: 1880–85; dis- 1 + establishment + -arian Related forms: dis⋅es⋅tab⋅lish⋅men⋅tar⋅i⋅an⋅ism, noun " [view link] Malapropism or cacology, intended or not, is a hanging offense on this here board! :) Anyway, I like the dancer asking. Hopefully, it will give her a better idea of who I am and what I'm looking for.
• Notsosly

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  15 years ago

  My apologies for word misuse, but I have always wanted to use that word in a sentence... How about "ultra-libertarian rhetoric?" Is that a more appropriate description?
• jablake

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  15 years ago

  Hi laxplayer, I think you were probably correct in your usage. Mainly, I just wanted to use malapropism and cacology. Sorry about that. In the past I wanted to use disestablishmentarianism as well, but was dissuaded (sp?) because of conflicting definitions. I like "ultra-libertarian" rhetoric. :) However, the few libertarians that I've met don't seem that libertarian---iows, they love the government when it does their bidding.
• Anna

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  15 years ago

  I have rescued this topic from the migraine-inducing political-propaganda-patriotism-debate hell...and posted it at the top of the board lol..I hate it when I slip into the blank blond expression and I tune out. Of course, I make exceptions where the party responsible for such pointless rant is paying me for my time and I have a drink in my hand.
• Anna

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  15 years ago

  Yep I was tipsy...anyways I did not post about this topic on the board because it was too long and kind of all over the place...I posted it as an article on my page if you guys mant to read it.