extras aren't allowed at my club but obviously there's ways around that to make the dance more enjoyable for me and whoever i'm dancing for...if im not in a private room the dances are in booths that depending how busy it is sometimes they're empty or full and i don't want other dancers overhearing our conversation so how do i let the guy know im fine with him taking his dick out without explicitly saying it or doing it myself?? i'm kinda shy lol like i tell them you can take your belt off, get comfortable, etc even when they adjust their pants ill do an air dance for a bit so they can do whatever they want but no one takes the hint...:(
and side note for anyone that gets a dancer that lets you do this please be considerate and discrete and cover up when necessary (position changes, someone walks past...) some guys are soo inconsiderate lmao
"Take your belt off" is a decent heads-up (I like to do that for courtesy to avoid dancer injuries). You could also whisper it, or use gestures. Any guy with half an ounce of awareness would get where you're hinting. If not, his loss!
It's quite simple. First, don't ask him to take his belt off. That's too direct, requires too much effort and can be obvious to others. When the time is right, just make an attempt to unbuckle his belt yourself while saying you want to make him more uncomfortable. If successful, then continue dancing with your hand(s) near the belt buckle. Again when the time is right, attempt to unzip his fly about half way. If he doesn't get the message and do the rest, there is no hope for him.
In a non extras club you can’t be subtle with decent customers. We may push boundaries to see where they are, but many will follow the rules of the club. Pulling out our dicks can get us thrown out or banned. If you back away, we don’t see that as a hint to whip it out. It’s a signal to tone it down. Not sure why you are too shy, but in the limited time of a dance being direct and explicit is better. Maybe phrase it as a question it? Put your hand on his button or zipper and ask if you can take it out? Or grope him over the pants and ask if he’d like to take it out? We’re men. We’re simple. It’s not rocket science but there may be a blast off. Good luck.
first place to start is you gotta work at clubs that tolerate extras.
the non extras club that you're working at now: does management allow barside grinds to take place? if yes and no one is looking, and also the guy is slick, then dick out is very doable.
People talking about taking the dudes belt off and unzipping his pants. Who wears a belt or pants with a zipper to a strip club lol. Warm up pants or athletic shorts for not only easy access but it's more comfortable for the dancer, who wants to grind on a belt or zipper?
so many guys wear jeans and belts in my club i really don't get it...
and i work at the best club in my city and have no reason to travel. i'm not saying extra curricular activities don't happen and but anything obviously has to be done really discretely
i guess a lot of guys that come in are under the impression it's a really strict club (some of them think they can't even touch me and it trips me out) so they don't even consider it. but even guys id expect to be freaky with me don't even try.
i swear when i first started dancing i had so many guys trying to do this now i get like no horny customers. idk if it's because i look way better and not as innocent as before or what...now that i type this i realize it's probably that...i guess customers think if a girl is too hot she won't be freaky??
@ jascoi all the rude comments you've left about my club aren't very nice..just because you pick the wrong girl doesn't mean comment on almost ever review how much it's sucks. lolz
Like Hank mentioned, to me a dancer backing away and air dancing, even briefly, is a message to back off, not whip it out. I'd also agree with his suggested approach. A hand on the zipper and any number of phrases can work: "you can let him out for air if you want", "can I see/feel it" , or if you want to also give him the hint to not be reckless you can throw in a comment about that like "if you're a little discreet you can take it out for me"
Another approach is to slide your panties to the side, then when he looks at your face you look down at his zipper. Kind of a your turn move. Its less direct, and you may have to give him some sort "yeah" or "yay" kinda encouragement once he starts.
Personally, I don't buy into the "hot girls don't do anything" stuff. I've seen very little correlation. Girls who try hard to project the fact that they have high opinions of themselves tend to be a bit tame. But that has nothing to do with my perception of their hotness.
I'd have to guess it's the air dancing that's causing guys to tone it down. I know that's the effect it has on me. The other effect it has is that I'm going to stop buying dances, and if it's a common theme from all the girls I'll stop going to that club.
if you still think i'm a man that's on you. i made this account to stalk the reviews to my club and make sure there's no vulgar reviews mentioning my name referring to any extra fun i might've had in the back. so far in 3 years i've only gotten one review saying im stunning. i guess im not that popular </3 ive tried posting on reddit but i just got cross posted to the strippers subreddit with everyone calling me fake and denying that im a real person. my look is too unique to post pictures and for obvious reasons i dont want people knowing how i look. again i work at a high contact but generally no extras club so this is major taboo and a big embarrassment to me if someone from my club puts 2 and 2 together
it's crazy you guys so airdance for 5 seconds means calm down.. if a guys trying to adjust himself and i stand up and give him the freedom to do that i'd think the opposite?? but im not a man so i guess i don't know what goes through you guys head
and since we're on the topic for any dancers that want to come on her and call me fake and deny that a real stripper can be getting sexual gratification from her job honestly f off. i wouldn't even be able to tolerate my job if i didn't get turned on by it. they all claim to be anti slut shaming and liberal when it comes to sex work but strippers are the most whorephobic women i know which is crazy because WE are the whores. sure the next level up is prostitution but simulated sex through a lap dance (yes a fully clothed one) still makes you a whore. the amount of shit i've gotten in the past making posts like this being called names and being told my real experiences are 'fan fiction' is insane. and even when there's endless proof i'm a real person (not here) on my account they'll STILL be in denial. 'no stripper would like that' 'no stripper would do that' you guys have your head so high on a pedestal making $$$$ by doing no real work ✨ golden pussy syndrome ✨ (thank you glossary) that you refuse to believe a girl can want to take advantage of dancing for horny guys and having a little fun too. and then they hide behind the excuse 'it messes up other girls money' it definitely doesn't because i have exactly zero repeat customers that ask me for anything extra. if it happens it happens. there's a reason some girls refuse to keep dick out of their mouth, hand, or their boobs out of a customers mouth at a non extras club (hint: they enjoy it)
We get a lot of trolls and fake accounts here. Or probably more accurately we've got 2-3 trolls who make countless accounts post a variety of fictional stories. I don't doubt that some dancers sometimes get some satisfaction out of giving a dance. I think its a small percentage of dancers, but not zero. There's also a very small percentage of dancers who post on this site. When you put all that together, hopefully you can understand our suspicion. Just going by the numbers, odds are posts like this are bullshit posted by a distrusted man or boy.
I tend to give each identity the benefit of the doubt till it becomes clear it's bullshit. so, in that spirit...
For the air dancing bit, to me it absolutely means things are going too far and the dancer is trying to cool things down. I have no idea if my interpretation is the prevailing one or not though.
In any case, you can back away to give me room to adjust or unzip without getting all the way off my lap and risking me thinking you want me to cool it.
Since this very thing has happened to me, I too would interpret getting off my lap during a lap dance as meaning she considers that I'm going to far. As Dolfan says, ask if I need room, or offer to help, or something that doesn't say "don't touch me."
The way one dancer did it to me without saying a word was to fumble around with my belt for a second before stepping back and give a "go ahead" gesture with her hands. In that way she communicated what she wanted without saying a word.
George is correct....girls who get squirmy / are backing away are doing so because they are attempting to avoid a certain touch/activity without actively saying to stop.
You don't want to take it out for him because you'll lose all plausible deniability if you should get caught.
You want to shift the risk from yourself to him by having him take it out. If you then get caught you can deny having anything to do with it - he just took it out; he must be a pervert!!! And you will keep your job, while the customer gets kicked out.
Unzip his fly half way. Hopefully, he'll follow through by fully unzipping his fly and then you can complete the job by taking it out.
Air dancers are scammers. The majority of air dancers arent instances where the customer pulled their dick out. Its just them pulling a scam. Usually its a boyfriend pimp rule; they dont want their girl grinding the clit too much getting off with clients, and may not want to grind on a clients hard dick either because its too intimate.
As far as dancers genuinely enjoying dances, i dont get why people are saying only a small percentage of dancers would genuinely enjoy the dances. Its the same as horse riding; rubbing the clit feels good for them. Of course, the ones who are doing air dances, wont enjoy the dances as much because theyre air dancing not grinding.
The question of whether giving a grinding lapdance feels good for the girl, is akin to asking if masturbating feels good. For most people/most scenarios it does.
If a dancer is doing an air dance, best thing to do is end all dances and end all contact there and save yourself from any future hassle/regret/scamming. You can even insult them, inform other people theyre a scammer, call them out in reviews so people are aware, etc.
idk why so many people keep talking about air dances when i said air dance i mean if a guy is trying to adjust himself i give him space (and stand up to cover the cameras) at the same time and play it off by giving a 5 second 'air dance' so can we just drop that please literally putting words in my mouth that don't even apply to what i asked on the first place
and @wisetoo literally wtf are you talking about?? again putting words into my mouth. the only way we'd get caught is if i stand up and the guys dick is on full display because he's dumb enough to not cover himself up when i stand up or something. you realize i lose my job too if that happens? (which it won't because im not retarted) i don't want to take it out myself because that's really obvious to the cameras and everyone else around me. i mean i guess i could be sneaky about it but why when i can just get the guy to do it himself and put himself in the position he feels comfortable in
let's try not making things up and being rude to someone that has nothing to do with your delusions
You asked literally wtf are you talking about? I'm not putting words in your mouth. You wrote, "i don't want to take it out myself because that's really obvious to the cameras and everyone else around me." Yet you seem to think the guy can take it out and NOT be obvious to the cameras ... Why is it obvious to the cameras when you take it out, but NOT obvious when the guy takes it out?
You want the guy to take it out because you can deny any responsibility should it get caught on camera which you can't do if the camera captures you with your hands on the goods. It's that simple. I hope you understand.
It sounds like you’re the expert of your club. You want the dick out but know it has to be done in a very specific way, but you want the guy to read your mind. Those two things have very little overlap. It’s why you came here to ask the question. What we’re trying to tell you is that it’s not always obvious to us. You want your customers to figure it out but if you got over your shyness you’d solve most of your questions. As someone else suggested, find out before you head back to the dance area whether someone might be interested in a little more and if so, let them know it has to be done in a certain way. You say you do it for your own stimulation, that’s great. But you can also ask for tip for doing a little more than what usually happens in your club. I hope that helps.
The dancer yesterday had a genius way of getting the point across. She stopped what she was doing, looked me in the eye and said: I keep getting cloth in my mouth can you take them off". I figured it out from there......
I believe the original question was “why don’t guys take the hint to pull their dick out?” To me it’s simple, in non-extras clubs, they don’t think it’s allowed, and in extras clubs, like we have here in SoFla, the second the dick comes out, there’s a $200 premium tacked on to the price of the dance (not mentioning any names, Cheetah Hallandale). So instead of worrying about interpreting hints, just discuss it beforehand in simple English (or Spanish). Here’s what I’d like to do, and this is what it’s going to cost. Goes a long way toward avoiding misunderstanding later.
Great points. While we may be deviants, we still maintain some level of situational awareness.
The point about establishing rate and performance expectations is critical. It's a bit touchy, though, as engaging in such communication could be incriminating, so you need to read the situation to only bring it up when you have comfort it's not a setup.
lmao you guys i can't make this up i ask this guy who's doing vips (like 45 minutes of them) if his jeans are comfortable or if it hurts him pulling his shirt out of his pants grabbing his waist band he's all 'no they're fine like this' like okay if you want rug burn on your dick by all means..
Please don't associate a jeans-wearing customer as a TUSCL'er PL. We know better than to wear jeans. We lean more toward the "sweat pants, no drawers" demographic.
I remember one of my first times ever getting extras, in Niagara Falls, she whispered in my ear "so you wanna take that bad boy out?" I got so hard so fast.
Seems like, if anyone is close enough to hear you whispering, you're likely to get caught. Can't you just slowly take it out yourself. If it's not immediately obvious he's down, you can ask him if he wants you to stop.
The trickier part, I would think, is getting what your looking for, tip-wise. If he's a cop, and you say exactly what you'll do for how much, you're hosed. But non-extras dancers often hint and then disappoint, so hinting might not be effective, except with newb customers.
Usually dancers on here get a lot of crap if they say they make good money without doing extras. Guess you just can't win.
Working details out ahead of time is a good idea but IMO and IME it works only a minority of the time. It works well with a dancer you’ve gone to VIP with before but when setting expectations with a new to you dancer, a lot of the interaction is less pragmatic negotiating and more about going with the vibe in VIP and seeing if there’s a physical connection. Your point is valid that straightforward talk is still the way to go but it’s not always in the flow of the conversation to say “I’ll pay you X if you do Y.”
okay yes true if they're wearing jeans they're obv not about that life...but also it's so crazy to me this guy on saturday night i did a room for pays me all this $$ ( he literally handed it to me and said he wants to do a room okay im not a scammer lol ) and he's wearing jeans and he's all 'can i pull my jeans down to my knees' like are you stupid?? lmao i just told him come back during the day shift tomorrow with soft pants and we can have more fun. i told him he picked the right girl though because if he said that to any other girl they would've just bitched at him. mini story time, i had a customer want to dance with me but i was busy so he went with another girl...20 min later she comes back in the dressing room bitching about i guess he said he was gonna come during the dance?? and she yells at him 'we don't do that here' and then he sees me on the floor and he's complaining he didn't get a good dance and i'm all well you shouldn't have went with another girl...
^the most important thing is eating pussy. The benefits of it are numerous because of the beneficial bacteria. The most important part of any ITC or OTC encounter, IMO is whether DATY is available.
Another extremely beneficial thing is breast milk but that can be tough to find. Especially since a boyfriend/pimp can be involved.
If youre paying money for something, you should try to get the most benefit from it you can… bbbj and DFK are also very beneficial because of the bacterial exchange
^ I havent. But I thought you eat plenty of pussy yourself. Only with tested people..? I was under the impression its safe as long as youre not eating visible warts or pustules
@RMD - I chow down on civvie pussy till the cows come home. That's rolling the dice, but it's better than chewing down professional pussy. That's rolling dice loaded against you.
^Puddy im a big anti vaxxer. I was under the impression all of them have more harms than benefits. Not just the covid one. The HPV risks are concerning though…
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the non extras club that you're working at now: does management allow barside grinds to take place? if yes and no one is looking, and also the guy is slick, then dick out is very doable.
No one takes the hint, huh? Right. I'm not taking the bait.
and i work at the best club in my city and have no reason to travel. i'm not saying extra curricular activities don't happen and but anything obviously has to be done really discretely
i guess a lot of guys that come in are under the impression it's a really strict club (some of them think they can't even touch me and it trips me out) so they don't even consider it. but even guys id expect to be freaky with me don't even try.
i swear when i first started dancing i had so many guys trying to do this now i get like no horny customers. idk if it's because i look way better and not as innocent as before or what...now that i type this i realize it's probably that...i guess customers think if a girl is too hot she won't be freaky??
Another approach is to slide your panties to the side, then when he looks at your face you look down at his zipper. Kind of a your turn move. Its less direct, and you may have to give him some sort "yeah" or "yay" kinda encouragement once he starts.
Personally, I don't buy into the "hot girls don't do anything" stuff. I've seen very little correlation. Girls who try hard to project the fact that they have high opinions of themselves tend to be a bit tame. But that has nothing to do with my perception of their hotness.
I'd have to guess it's the air dancing that's causing guys to tone it down. I know that's the effect it has on me. The other effect it has is that I'm going to stop buying dances, and if it's a common theme from all the girls I'll stop going to that club.
but im not a man so i guess i don't know what goes through you guys head
anyways you guys are giving great advice!!
I tend to give each identity the benefit of the doubt till it becomes clear it's bullshit. so, in that spirit...
For the air dancing bit, to me it absolutely means things are going too far and the dancer is trying to cool things down. I have no idea if my interpretation is the prevailing one or not though.
In any case, you can back away to give me room to adjust or unzip without getting all the way off my lap and risking me thinking you want me to cool it.
Not sure most men need coaxing to do so.
You want to shift the risk from yourself to him by having him take it out. If you then get caught you can deny having anything to do with it - he just took it out; he must be a pervert!!! And you will keep your job, while the customer gets kicked out.
Unzip his fly half way. Hopefully, he'll follow through by fully unzipping his fly and then you can complete the job by taking it out.
As far as dancers genuinely enjoying dances, i dont get why people are saying only a small percentage of dancers would genuinely enjoy the dances. Its the same as horse riding; rubbing the clit feels good for them. Of course, the ones who are doing air dances, wont enjoy the dances as much because theyre air dancing not grinding.
The question of whether giving a grinding lapdance feels good for the girl, is akin to asking if masturbating feels good. For most people/most scenarios it does.
and @wisetoo literally wtf are you talking about?? again putting words into my mouth. the only way we'd get caught is if i stand up and the guys dick is on full display because he's dumb enough to not cover himself up when i stand up or something. you realize i lose my job too if that happens? (which it won't because im not retarted) i don't want to take it out myself because that's really obvious to the cameras and everyone else around me. i mean i guess i could be sneaky about it but why when i can just get the guy to do it himself and put himself in the position he feels comfortable in
let's try not making things up and being rude to someone that has nothing to do with your delusions
You asked literally wtf are you talking about? I'm not putting words in your mouth. You wrote, "i don't want to take it out myself because that's really obvious to the cameras and everyone else around me." Yet you seem to think the guy can take it out and NOT be obvious to the cameras ... Why is it obvious to the cameras when you take it out, but NOT obvious when the guy takes it out?
You want the guy to take it out because you can deny any responsibility should it get caught on camera which you can't do if the camera captures you with your hands on the goods. It's that simple. I hope you understand.
and hope i see you. your attitude is refreshing!
Besides, if a girl is making money for a club, they really don't gaf what the girl does in VIP.
So instead of worrying about interpreting hints, just discuss it beforehand in simple English (or Spanish). Here’s what I’d like to do, and this is what it’s going to cost. Goes a long way toward avoiding misunderstanding later.
The point about establishing rate and performance expectations is critical. It's a bit touchy, though, as engaging in such communication could be incriminating, so you need to read the situation to only bring it up when you have comfort it's not a setup.
The trickier part, I would think, is getting what your looking for, tip-wise. If he's a cop, and you say exactly what you'll do for how much, you're hosed. But non-extras dancers often hint and then disappoint, so hinting might not be effective, except with newb customers.
Usually dancers on here get a lot of crap if they say they make good money without doing extras. Guess you just can't win.
Working details out ahead of time is a good idea but IMO and IME it works only a minority of the time. It works well with a dancer you’ve gone to VIP with before but when setting expectations with a new to you dancer, a lot of the interaction is less pragmatic negotiating and more about going with the vibe in VIP and seeing if there’s a physical connection. Your point is valid that straightforward talk is still the way to go but it’s not always in the flow of the conversation to say “I’ll pay you X if you do Y.”
And yes....no sense in rushing into a room just for the sake of rushing into it...wait for a girl who will perform well.
Another extremely beneficial thing is breast milk but that can be tough to find. Especially since a boyfriend/pimp can be involved.
If youre paying money for something, you should try to get the most benefit from it you can… bbbj and DFK are also very beneficial because of the bacterial exchange