Strip clubs for introverts

18 comments

• Jascoi

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  17 days ago

  alcohol.
• georgmicrodong

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  17 days ago

  I forced myself to learn some extrovert behaviours years ago. It took a fair bit of work, and I will never actually *be* an extrovert, nor would I *want* to be, but it's been helpful. The Marine Corps actually helped me quite a bit.
• wallanon

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  17 days ago

  "I forced myself to learn some extrovert behaviours years ago." I'm kinda like the opposite. It's actually really easy for me to be around people and talk but I've learned to be more reserved over time. Life is easier that way and I'm lazy lol.
• wallanon

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  17 days ago

  "how do you make your trips to the strip club more enjoyable?" To converse energy introverts could make dancers approach instead of going up to them. They could have two or three go to questions that seem to get dancers really talking so they could mostly just listen. They could pick one or two dancers who are their favorites for that visit and focus solely on getting time with them, including telling other dancers they're waiting on them. When buying a drink they could discreetly ask if there are dancers in the back matching a certain description. That might get the girls you'd like out faster. Stuff like that.
• shailynn

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  17 days ago

  It shouldn't be hard to find a woman who likes to talk more than you.
• funonthaside

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  17 days ago

  Good one, shailynn. The ability to / comfort with conversing is highly dependent on the dynamic between people. A dancer approaching with firing questions of "where you from / what you do / been here before" should be quickly released from the encounter. She won't listen to your responses, anyway, so she's not really "conversing", and it will be quite uncomfortable. Don't force conversation. If it doesn't flow smoothly, with a back and forth exchange, move to another girl. Also observe girls as they move through the club. Look for ones who are smiling and making eye contact with guys as they speak with them. They will likely be the ones easiest to speak with. Avoid the ones with blank stares, no smiles, crossed arms or hands stiffly to their sides, or feet turned away from guy. I'm also highly introverted, but I have multiple girls in my rotation that I can, and have, spoken with for hours. Conversation flows smoothly with some, and is painful with others. Don't go to clubs thinking it's a requirement to converse. Watch the girls, tip the girls, and make eye contact with the girls. Eventually, a girl will approach to initiate conversation. If it flows smoothly, continue as long as it's pleasant. Otherwise, excuse yourself and move onto the next girl. Most people will never be able to converse comfortably with 100% of people. At least you're only the customer, and not a socially awkward stripper who painfully attempts to make conversion with customers as part of her job. Many strippers I have encountered, if working mainstream jobs, would be best suited for jobs as accountants or engineers, than salespeople.
• twentyfive

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  17 days ago

  You dot realize how many people are introverted until a pandemic hits and their life doesn’t change at all.
• Book Guy

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  17 days ago

  Let the word get out that you're not very outgoing. Tell one or two dancers at the tip-rail, that you are the sort of guy who wants to really be approached in a serial manner by every dancer in the house. Each dancer has her own clique of friends, so if you communicate this notion to a suitable cross-section of clique membership, you'll be identified as someone who is not going to be super-rejection-heavy. Beware. This strategy has the obvious disadvantage of causing all the dancers in the house to assume that you want them to approach you. Generally speaking, each end of the spectrum has advantages and disadvantages. If you hate it when any girl approaches, and you send that vibe, on the occasion when the super-hottie whom you wanted to approach ends up ignoring you, then you have only yourself to blame. If you hate approaching and want every girl to do the approaching, on the occasion when the dogtrot messengers whom you wanted to ignore you end up approaching, then you again have only yourself to blame. In fact, the please-approach-me vibe is not unusual in a strip club. That's part of the appeal for men, we are less expected to take the initiative and at least some of the onus is put onto the women. This is unlike at civilian meet-ups where the social expectations are, that any male who fails to approach is by definition both a bad catch and bad at catching (neither of which is logically a necessary conclusion, but we socially assume them anyway). Additionally, I might add, one of the main reasons I end up chasing after some women in strip clubs, is in order to avoid other women. In a room of twenty quasi-hot women and five uggs, I'll probably corral one of the quasi-hotties as self-protection. The uggs are going to be the most pro-active about approaching. And, in line with the male social-expectation (see above) they will often, quite wrongly, assume that because they are being forward and pro-active, they are therefore defining themselves are more desirable. Problem is, it doesn't generally work that way (at least not for me). When a dorky male becomes an approach-monster dorky male in a civilian club, he generally is accomplishing at least a mild reduction in his undesirability merely by the fact of making an approach. "Points for confidence," the girls say to themselves. To the contrary, when a visually unappealing female becomes an approach-monster visually unappealing female (in a civilian OR strip club) she is not generally accomplishing a mild reduction in her undesirability. Instead, by the fact of making an approach, she is probably becoming MORE undesirable, generally speaking. "Even more loss of points for arrogant self-congratulation in the face of obvious evidence to the contrary," the boys say to themselves. It's the "fat girl in mini-skirt that was designed for skinny girl" phenomenon. Sure, some guys give positive points to the ugg because of her chutzpah, but that's pity points, IMO. Just some thoughts. You may disagree. Approaching strippers is really quite easy. Reach out and touch someone.
• JamesSD

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  17 days ago

  Give her one word answers then ask her about herself.
• 5footguy

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  17 days ago

  "how do you make your trips to the strip club more enjoyable?" @docsavage: What is your purpose in going to the club? Asked another way, what would make a trip "enjoyable" to you?
• HoneyDewMelons

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  17 days ago

  @shailynn ....good one
• uniquename

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  16 days ago

  Never ask her questions that be answered with yes or no. Ask open ended questions, listen to what she’s saying, and ask more questions based upon that.
• Manuellabore

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  16 days ago

  SCs are the perfect environment for introverts. The dancers aren't looking to date us. Assuming they move beyond "wanna dance" they are going to want to be sufficiently engaging to make you think they like you and then ask if you're interested in a dance, if you don't ask first. The convo can also be a quick litmus test to suss out creeps, and being shy alone doesn't make you a creep. So it is a low bar for conversational skills and can actually be a confidence builder. You imagine that you are actually being engaging and can forget you have the training wheels on.
• Lanechange

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  14 days ago

  In my experience it may go different in extras clubs than nonextra clubs. In extras clubs dancers are trying to get to vip to make money. If they learn you arent they move on to find a one who is. With that said, they are women. And each may be different. Some are introverts themselves. Just be okay with trying things and see what you like. And be be okay with passing and trying someone else.
• Freesample

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  14 days ago

  @Manuellabore Resonates with me. Might reflect aspects of my own journey through the world of strip clubs. Then again, I could have just aged out of my heavy introversion. It's been many years. Lots more experience under my belt, in multiple avenues. But I like the training wheel analogy. For some introverts, SC's probably really do help to get the ball rolling when it comes to getting out of their shell. Have to shell out some dough, but get some easy reps in for those beginning stages.
• GivenToFly

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  10 days ago

  What OP said really describes the way I feel also. I’ll even take it farther and say most of the time I prefer a purely physical interaction with a dancer I decide I want. I don’t feel the need for us to get to know each other if I’ll probably never see them again. The meaningless conversations can actually be a turn off.
• Studme53

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  10 days ago

  One of the things I like most about this hobby is seeing a dancer who physically appeals to my sexual desires, approaching her, and after a few words get her in private where, hopefully, I indulge my lust. There’s something about it that really appeals to my basic instinct.
• goldmongerATL

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  10 days ago

  Think about a strip club. She is naked. you are not. If anything, she should be the nervous one, not you. Watch how the girls sit and talk with others. If she is doing most of the listening, probably not the girl for you. If she is the one doing the talking, that might be the right girl.