Why is it called a "fantasy"?

avatar for Book Guy
Book Guy
I write it like I mean it, but mostly they just want my money.
I don't get it. Why do people say that what you buy at a strip club is a "fantasy"? For me, I am definitely NOT "fantasizing" about a girl grinding on my dick, while a girl is grinding on my dick. To the contrary, I am experiencing the "reality" of a girl grinding on my dick, while a girl is grinding on my dick.

Here's what a "fantasy" is. When I see a hot girl in the park and I wonder what it would be like to fuck her from behind, but then I run away whining, like the PL that I am, and never speak to her or even try to meet her, but I do sit at home and imagine fucking her from behind, well then, THAT IS A FANTASY.

I go to strip clubs for the reality. I want to see naked tits. In reality, at strip clubs, I see naked tits. I want a hot girl to grind on my lap. In reality, at strip clubs, a hot girl grinds on my lap. And so forth. There is little to no falsehood or fantasy involved. Anybody who is fantasizing about something at a strip club, must be thinking about something that is not available there -- peace and quiet? a calm and soothing atmosphere? sobriety? a romantic relationship with an emotionally compatible young woman whom he'd like to introduce to his mother? That stuff is not generally available. I find it difficult to believe that any men are ACTUALLY fantasizing that a stripper is an emotionally compatible and available young woman who might have a civilian romantic relationship with him. Men don't sit there thinking, "Omigoooood it would be SO GREAT to introduce this girl to mom, and then take her to the park, where we can fly kites and blow dandelions together." No, men are sitting there thinking, "nice tits. I can see her tits and look at what her tits are like, for real. I want her to grind on my lap. I can pay for her to actually, in fact, grind on my lap."

Dandelions and kites seldom enter my mind while I am ogling nice tits at a strip club.

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avatar for 5footguy
5footguy
8 months ago
It's a fantasy because in a strip club, an attractive female will approach you, ask to sit down, and then grind on you.

In reality, attractive females do not approach you, do not ask to sit down, and do not grind on you.
avatar for Book Guy
Book Guy
8 months ago
Dude, you just contradicted yourself. Your last sentence should say, "In places other than strip clubs, attractive females (etc.)". But, IN STRIP CLUBS, attractive females DO "approach you" and DO "ask to sit down" etc.. I concede that it's DIFFERENT from the civilian non-ecdysiastical world, yes. But it's not FANTASY. It's frickin' REALITY. I think this distinction is important, we're mis-using words here. What we mean, when we say "It's a fantasy," is absolutely NOT, "she won't grind her ass on your dick" or "you won't see her tits, you'll have to fantasize about them." Rather, maybe what we mean when we say "It's a fantasy" (I think) is, instead, "it's not approved. You shouldn't." And I object to that. Or maybe what we mean when we say "It's a fantasy" is, "she doesn't really like you but she'll act like she likes you." I don't mind that. I just don't want to wander around lying to myself with, "it's a fantasy." I want to try to think in terms of the truth -- it's not a fantasy, unless my expectation is that I do the approvable thing, get a civilian relationship with an attractive woman who genuinely likes my company and wants to fuck me. That's not my expectation or my desire.

Meh you probably got my point but I felt like elaborating anyway. :)

I have an erotic hypnosis MP3, it's an induction and a set of triggers to give me a mental orgasm. It sort of works, not really, never really ejaculated, so I consider it a guided fantasy. On the other hand, I went to Visions in New Orleans East yesterday. I got a type of service that gave me a physical orgasm. It worked, I consider it reality.
avatar for GivenToFly
GivenToFly
8 months ago
The feelings of arousal and pleasure are real, no one’s questioning that. The “fantasy” is that you’re stepping outside of the real world to get it and very little interaction is genuine.
avatar for drewcareypnw
drewcareypnw
8 months ago
OP is right on about almost everything, the main point from my perspective is that while it might *be* my fantasy, getting DC Jr cranked by a hottie 1/2 my age while I suck her tits is very real indeed.

The one thing you are wrong about is: "I find it difficult to believe that any men are ACTUALLY fantasizing that a stripper is an emotionally compatible and available young woman who might have a civilian romantic relationship with him."

...these guys are out there, they're in the clubs, and a few of them are on this board. They're the same men who hit on baristas, they can't tell when a woman is only being nice because it's her job.
avatar for Muddy
Muddy
8 months ago
Yeah I agree. If I'm about to hand over a girl 400 bucks, it means I'm planning on actually fucking her. In reality. Nothing to dream about.
avatar for WiseToo
WiseToo
8 months ago
I think a lot of guys do believe a young stripper might have a civilian romantic relationship. That can explain why a good number of guys try to arrange an OTC with a stripper. The OTC could be something simple, initially like a dinner date with anticipation that if all goes well something more is expected in the future.

These guys are spending money on a date just like they would with a civilian girl so they fantasize that a romantic relationship is possible, just give it time. He knows the stripper may have other customers, but when she is with him he fantasizes that their relationship is different from the others.

I think this is actually quite common.
avatar for nicespice
nicespice
8 months ago
Per the theme of the other recent thread made: A dancer who won’t work it=a dancer who isn’t participating in any type of fantasy. The vast majority of dancers wanna make money and not have to participate in any of the nonsense most customers want, whether physically or emotional labor. 👀 Most end up participating anyways.
avatar for docsavage
docsavage
8 months ago
I think some customers do a have a fantasy their club regular might become their girlfriend. I consider it a good thing I am a guy in his sixties spending time with strippers in their twenties. I am very aware my age takes me out of the potential boyfriend category so I do not waste time on trying to get them in a romantic relationship. I focus on getting good value for my money.
avatar for skibum609
skibum609
8 months ago
It's not reality. Emotions and actions with someone who wouldn't even look at you without getting paid is the ultimate fantasy where for $$$$ you can pretend whatever you like. It cannot be a fantasy come true because no monger who sees dancers outside the club will ever admit that deep down, they wish they weren't paying, and it was all real, because they also know it is all fake.
Pls are not even close to the same and not every PL is looking for OTC or extras, or anything other than entertainment.
avatar for Book Guy
Book Guy
8 months ago
@docsavage ditto for me, though I haven't yet passed 60 I'm well on my way.

But, I'm surprised at the idea that "some customers do a have a fantasy their club regular might become their girlfriend". Wait really? Who!!?? Seriously now ...
avatar for Studme53
Studme53
8 months ago
It’s really the opposite of fantasy. With zero effort and a little money you can have cheap sex.
avatar for gSteph
gSteph
8 months ago
It's the best of both worlds.

These are REALLY nice boobs I'm fondling, for real.
The fantasy is that she's enjoying this as much as I am. Possible I guess, but unlikely, but fun to fantasize. Makes my fun funner.
avatar for Manuellabore
Manuellabore
8 months ago
I'd break it down this way: If you buy into one of those deals where they let you take a race car for a couple of laps around the track, you are actually driving a fast car around the track. That doesn't mean that you are a race car driver, but you get to fantasize that you are, and it is still fun. If you pay to have sex with a hot woman at a strip club, you are undeniably having sex, but that doesn't make you a player, but you can fantasize that you are, and it is still fun.
avatar for stripperlover777
stripperlover777
8 months ago
Clients Typically "Fantasy Think" Before The Action Really Occurs. The "Fantasy" Is In Play To Hopefully Actually Make It Come True. Now, Sometimes Fantasies Can't B Achieved So It Stays As A Fantasy. Fantasies/Wishes/Dreams Etc.... Is A Great Way For Self Stimulation, Entertainment & To Get Yourself + The Dancers Motivated To Make It Happen. Sometimes, Clients Don't Really Think The're Really Going To Score In On The Dancers So "Fantasies" Will Help Entertain Them Until They Can Successfully Perform Them. I Would Talk To My Dancer About How Much I Really Like Her & See What She Says About Makin' Some Fantasies Come True & For A Nice Celebration ⚡ 👄 💲
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