Be careful who you talk to

Tuesday, May 30, 2023 11:55 PM
Met up with another monger acquaintance this weekend. I'll call him Bob. He's richer than I am. Much richer. He's a little older, maybe mid-sixties, divorced, and about to retire. He has, or rather had (thus the title of this thread) a sugar situation going with former dancer. I'll call her Candy. He never let much go in the way of detail, but I gather he spent a lot on her, gifts, vacations, the whole nine yards. I got this whole story from Bob by way of warning me about him. Bob had been hanging with this other group of mongers for several years. One of them, "Bill", seems to have figured out who his sugar baby was. He'd never actually told them (nor had he told me), but Bill had figured it out somehow. Turns out that Candy was someone Bill had been trying to get with for quite some time, but she'd always turned him down. Apparently Candy used to work with another girl who has lately turned escort. So Bill got hold of the escort, ostensibly to get with her, but obviously in reality to try to get with Candy. Why he thought contacting a *different* escort to try to get with Candy, I don't know, but... In the course of conversation with the escort, Bill dropped the fact that he "knew" about Candy and Bob, and that Bob has revealed details of their relationship. He also dropped all kinds of info about *other* dancers like names, costs, activities, etc. So the escort immediately told Candy and she blew up. From what Bob said, "blew up" is a pale description. She apparently believed the whole tale that Bill was spinning. Not only did Candy break it off with Bob, but she and the escort also warned the dancers he'd named that Bill was dropping their info. I'd wondered why I hadn't seen Bill in the clubs for a couple months. All because a blabbermouth couldn't keep his jealous mouth shut. So again, be careful who you talk to.

37 comments

Better yet, choose your friends wisely, Bob.
Mate27
a year ago
So is Bill a monger on this site we need to be wary of? Please PM me with his handle if he is.
gammanu95
a year ago
Words of wisdom !!! Had a fav before COVID that I saw a couple of times a week when I was in town and usually an OTC session at least one time a week for a couple of years. Knew she had a fiance/bf that she told me she had, but his job moved him to another state. I was hired to consult for a company out of state for 3 weeks. The person that had me train took me to the local stripclub each weekend that was an extras factory. The CEO had given him an entertainment budget to keep me in town on weekends, so he would get a large VIP room & 4/5 dancers for stress relief for both of us. We discussed clubs I visited at home & he was interested, but I don't share identifying details with people I just met. The last weekend instead of hitting the club, he invited some dancers & some girls from the company over for a farewell party at his house. Just him, I & 2 other guys from the company with 5 strippers & 4 gals from the company. Needless to say, lots of naked women & adult fun throughout the night into the next afternoon. During the morning, one of the company gals pulled me into the master br for some fun. As she was leaning on the dresser with me behind her banging away, I looked over & saw a picture of him & my fav in what was obviously a couples photo. Glad I didn't share identifying details before knowing someone well, because just 4 weeks earlier her lips were against my balls as she was deep throating me.
etsutwigg222
a year ago
@gammanu95: "So is Bill a monger on this site we need to be wary of?" Not a clue. Bob never mentioned TUSCL, and neither did I.
georgmicrodong
a year ago
I expect that if Bob *is* here somewhere, he'll see this. No idea if he'll chime in.
georgmicrodong
a year ago
I learned my lesson - trust no one. Long time ago I revealed my identity in private messages to a guy on a local Michigan board. Many dancers read comments and reviews so I was really disappointed he betrayed my trust and outed me
motorhead
a year ago
Wild story. What an a-hole Bill. His loose lips ended up screwing him in the end it seems. Bob obviously got hosed too. Yet I think I’m more befuddled by wig22’s story. What CEO gives enough fun money that one could get a vip room with multiple girls? That’s wild.
captainfun
a year ago
Maybe the moral of this story is to keep your private business private. Bob obviously talked more than he should have.
doctorevil
a year ago
Better yet get a better name than "Bob." 🤣 Confession, my real name isn't Dave. Its Robert. I hate the name "Bob." I'm younger than your much balleyhooed "Bob" in this story, but honestly that name is annoying. Since my name is Robert I can say that. Lol.
Dave_Anderson
a year ago
My real name is Robert William. That always gave me a lot of flexibility with what I went by. Robert, Rob, Robby, Bob, Bobby, Bert, Will, Willy, Bobby Bert, etc. Yet I always wanted to be named Dave or Steve. I don't blame my mom, she named me after her obstetrician Dr. Roberts. But I've always liked the names Steve and Dave.
Dave_Anderson
a year ago
I also always loved the last name Anderson. Here's a clue, my real last name isn't Anderson, lol. I just like the sound of it.
Dave_Anderson
a year ago
Growing up my friends always called me Rob, but my mom was like "your name is Robert not Bob or Rob." So I never told her my friends always called me Rob. To this day the more formal the situation the more likely I am to call myself "Robert" and the more casual "Rob." Never, ever "Bob."
Dave_Anderson
a year ago
The guy I club with most is a blabbermouth. He’ll talk to dancers, other guys, random people. It’s just part of his personality. I first learned it after he told some of our mutual guy friends how often I clubbed and they were razzing me about it. Since then, I’ve kept details low, but we club together a few times per month and no matter how vague I am I’m always a bit on edge wondering what he might say.
Hank Moody
a year ago
It's never been in my nature to disclose information and almost 41 years as an attorney makes it virtually impossible for me to tell anyone anything. My wife found out last year that one of her sisters had come to see me for a divorce, which never happened in 1992. The sister was amazed, my wife wasn't surprised. good or bad, I repeat nothing I hear.
skibum609
a year ago
@skibum609: "My wife found out last year that one of her sisters had come to see me for a divorce" Would that not have violated some version of confidentiality? I've never been quite clear on exactly when the "official" client confidentiality thing kicks in.
georgmicrodong
a year ago
I’m with skibum on this one, I never repeat shit I know about, I do use it to my advantage when it seems appropriate.
twentyfive
a year ago
Client confidentiality clicks in the minute I render an opinion/advice. Its why I refuse to discuss my job outside of work. Not going to give people advice if I have a drink or get high. It was up to my sister-in-law to tell my Wife. I wasn't there when my Wife found out and even though it pissed her off, I refused to confirm what her sister said as true. Even though he is used to it and I trust her to never repeat anything I say, ever, I still say nothing. Well I do remind her that she's really still mad that one of my former co-worker she really likes has three kids and she never even knew she was pregnant. I graduated from the Sergeant Schultx Law School and I know nothing....
skibum609
a year ago
Well Dave A sounds as if you have a lot of people rambling around in that big old head of yours. The best part of having schizophrenia... ...is all the friends you've made
elmer
a year ago
Some people delight in using information to harm others. I’ve got a couple people in my extended family who use gossip to cause dissection among family members. Maybe it makes them feel powerful. More likely, they just want others to be as miserable as they are. People like that are truly toxic.
mark94
a year ago
Dissension, not dissection 😊
mark94
a year ago
dissection causing dissension.
rattdog
a year ago
I don't talk to anyone about anything I do with anyone else. Ever. That applies to even my closest friends and family. It used to be that other men in your inner circle could be trusted to keep their mouths shut. What happens in the club, stays in the club, right? Not anymore. I think this ended with my father's generation, right around the time when men stopped embracing concepts like male strength and pride. Nowadays too many of them are emotional pussies who are hypersensitive and eager to please. This has served me well for a long time in the clubs. For some girls, especially in small clubs, the biggest hurdle to OTC is not the sex, but the risk that it will come back to bite them in the ass. Once a girl really understands that a man can be trusted to keep his fucking hole shut, it makes things much easier. The one big mistake I made recently is to out myself by meeting up with other TUSCLers in my favorite club. It made things wonky in that club for a while. I know that a couple of dancers and definitely a couple of the female bartenders started reading my online posts. Where before I was a discreet unknown quantity, suddenly the scope of my extracurricular activities became better understood. C'est la vie I suppose.
rickdugan
a year ago
^Totally get that and its' the most likely reason there are no Desires meetups, despite the large number of regulars here.
skibum609
a year ago
These tales are good reminders to be cautious. But, there is real value in having one or a very few trusted PLs to share information with. I worry a lot more about sharing too much with dancers. They know dancers at other clubs, they talk, they are connected on social media, and they use information for their own advantage, sometimes vindictively. I’m also amazed at the stuff twig was provided by a corporate client! I thought those days were long gone.
azdd
a year ago
"I don't talk to anyone about anything I do with anyone else. Ever. That applies to even my closest friends and family." ^ Yup. This. I was never a big gossip, but I used to be a little more willing to talk to folks here with some level of specificity, and on a few occasions asked similar questions of members. Yes, she did what she said or her rate was $xxx kinda thing. I don't do either anymore. Too many issues, thankfully all very minor, but enough to make me realize the err of my ways. I've been asked about girls people have seen me drop off at the club or come walking out of a back room with, and I'll sit there with a straight face and deny even knowing the girl. I've done it when they're still sitting in my lap.
Dolfan
a year ago
yeah, I don't talk to anyone about what I do. There is just no upside. But a couple months ago I was sitting with a girl after just finishing a VIP and saw out of the corner of my eye a guy I sit with on a 501(c)(6) board. As I walked out past him I didn't look but I assume he saw me. He missed the last board meeting but I'm curious if he will say anything. I sure won't.
Rob1115
a year ago
Yeah Dave is definitely still a virgin.
shailynn
a year ago
Rhode Island is already a very small state. I struggle to justify making it that much smaller specifically in connection to an activity where privacy and anonymity are pretty important.
Call.Me.Ishmael
a year ago
Loose lips, sink ships....
CostaTheCrazyGreek
a year ago
A young guy in my company had his bachelor party at a friends house. Strippers, etc. They found out the homeowner used a hidden camera to record it. They should have hung him.
mark94
a year ago
No offense to anyone but this is less about some guy who has an inferiority complex-personality disorder that causes him to reveal intimate details so indiscriminately. That is definitely part of the story but the bigger part is about the process of selection on who YOU reveal intimate details to (and an additional part about personal responsibility). “Gee the guy was the greatest confidante ever that I revealed so much to but then one day he started talking to everyone” — umm yea VERY unlikely. In nearly every instance that someone ends up shocked at how someone else acted (in this instance, that appalling supposed friend/dickhead’s lack of discretion) — yep, it isn’t really that shocking. Red flags nearly always abound, we just choose to look the other way. Put more precisely, what happens is on you/me because you/me chose, consciously, to ignore the red flags. Ultimately one can choose to see the mistake they made (i.e. it is on me for poor decision/selection) or be part of the TikTok society of hyper emotional ‘it is always someone else’s fault’. Worse, then the ‘none of it is my fault’ mistake is compounded by going ‘that hurt so much! I’ll never! Talk to anyone’ (gone extra TikTok now). Life is a long series lessons on what YOU do wrong. The lessons will sting or even hurt bad. You’ll unfortunately run across the Bills of the world regularly. Learn from it, make better choices than previous, control what you can control, don’t substitute a thought process for impulse (impulse example: never talk to anyone! JHFC, you’re not the Lufthansa heist crew. Sure, it’s minor to modest scandal regarding a combination of SC ITC/OTC and the story about the birds/bees). Two Lessons: (1) YOU Select better confidantes, (2) there’s many more sugar babies in the candy aisle.
Brahma2k
a year ago
This hobby is inherently solitary. Only trusted confidants know I do it, and no one who is going to catch feelings for a stripper and complicate my interactions with any of them.
Tetradon
a year ago
@Brahma2k: "That is definitely part of the story but the bigger part is about the process of selection on who YOU reveal intimate details to (and an additional part about personal responsibility)." According to Bob, he did NOT reveal intimate details. I know he's never revealed such to *me*, and I tend to assume that he did the same to others. Of course, he could be lying or mistaken, but in either of those cases, the warning is still relevant. That said, even if he's not lying or mistaken, he obviously dropped enough clues, consciously or not, for Bill to figure things out. It's also possible that Bill simply assumed facts not in evidence and just thought he'd fuck things up.
georgmicrodong
a year ago
I advocate sharing intel on-line, but never in real life. Sex workers can brush off online comments as fiction by anonymous trolls, and sometimes like the publicity. IME the only time it becomes an issue is if they link the screen name to the customer and they think the customer lied about them or insulted them in the post. So don’t share your screen name with anyone. Yeah there’s some that get mad that their whoring ways became public, but IMO that’s on them for whoring in public, so sorry you’re ashamed of your own acts maybe if you care that much don’t do it? LOL. Any seasoned monger knows shit gets out, whores are mental & mercurial, and eventually you’re gonna move on. That’s life.
RiskA
a year ago
This story illustrates one of the several benefits of tuscl. It is natural to want to share and process one's exploits of whatever kind with other humans. Counselors, priests, best buds, wives, social media, etc. all play this role. However, when the exploits are marginalized or even illegal, sharing becomes inherently risky. A man with substantial family commitments, wealth, property, professional and social connections, stands to lose a lot by confessing his sins to the wrong person. So, an anonymous forum becomes the safe place to talk it out, brag, complain, commiserate, scheme, etc. Thanks founder, once again.
drewcareypnw
a year ago
@drewcareypnw. You are absolutely correct. There is no one outside of this forum that I can discuss this stuff with. I only found it a few years ago and it is a valuable source of intel plus I like the interaction, something not otherwise possible for me.
Rob1115
a year ago
Bacon!!
JimGassagain
a year ago
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