When you see them slowly go off the rails

rickdugan
Verified and Certifiable Super-Reviewer
No I'm not talking about the young girls who fall into drugs and quickly crash and burn. I'm talking about the ones who have been dancing for a while whose lives slowly take a turn for the worse.

This one in particular was simply living above her adjusted means. She had a nice place, was driving a nice car and otherwise was living a good life courtesy of dancer money. Then the pandemic hit and her troubles started.

She was able to dig herself out of a pending eviction the first time around when the clubs re-opened, but with the slowdown in customer spending over the last several months, she wasn't able to keep her head above water for long. Now she's not only been evicted from her apartment, but now has creditors after her, including one who is suing her in court. Don't ever cross Capital One boys and girls, lol.

Now she's in a pickle. Even if she could manage to scrape up the money to put two months down to get a new place - at least $3k in this market - she's going to struggle to find anyone who will rent to her with a credit score doubtlessly in the toilet. With the surging rental demand from people moving into the Jacksonville area from other places, it's definitely a landlord's market.

And no, this is not a situation where I'm collecting intel due to an OTC interest. She's just a genuinely sweet girl who I've spoken with off and on for some time. Don't get me wrong, she's sexy as hell and I'd gladly give her an avenue to earn if that option opened up, but I already know that it won't. I already know from a couple of historical drunken deep dives with her that she's got heavy-weight personal baggage that makes it a hard non-starter for her. Indeed if she could get herself to do that she probably wouldn't be in this position in the first place as she wouldn't lack for potential partners.

Anyway, it is what it is. She's young and will no doubt bounce back, but is is just sad to see a genuinely decent person struggle so much. It's always a pleasure to see her ITC, even if we have long ago come to understand that we are not each others' preferred ITC targets. I hope she doesn't have ot leave the area, but it could come to that.

Anyone else ever watch something like this and feel bad for the person involved?

36 comments

Latest

shailynn
2 years ago
Yes and no. Know lots of people (ones with average lives and ones with “affluent” lives) that live way above their means. Some people stretch that paycheck as far as they can and not saving anything because they think everything is fine. All it takes is 2 weeks of a “bump in the road of life” to derail everything. Remember when several government employees didn’t get a check for something like 6 weeks? I knew a lot of people that got way off from that.

If you can, and you should try your best… I always preach to have enough emergency money set aside in case you get laid off for a year. Know what it costs you to live for a year. Now, everyone should have a plan to cover themselves for six months, but a year is even better.

As for a specific relation to your story I do know of 2 strippers that were in great financial shape before the pandemic that had solid goals once their stripping careers were over. I imagine both their goals got derailed because they were high earners and had high expectations. They lived within their means though. One of them had/has high anxiety issues to begin with so when things don’t go right she has a lot of trouble coping, and life during COVID lockdown was the ultimate test for many. I have not kept in touch with either of them so I don’t know how they’re faring.

Also know the difference between wants and needs.
Warrior15
2 years ago
This is exactly why I got into sugaring. I want to help young girls get out of that hole they have dug for themselves. Makes me feel good that I am giving back to my community. I really feel like sugaring allowances should be tax deductible. These girls are just turning it right back out into the economy by spending.

I'm such a philanthropist.
Call.Me.Ishmael
2 years ago
I've seen similar situations both in and out of the clubs.

On one hand, it's easy to finger wag and say "You should have saved for the hard times!" But the reality is that I wasn't particularly good at that when I was young. Some lessons are learned the hard way (if they are learned at all...).

Yes, I do have sympathy for nice people who work hard and yet fall into hard times. Under the right unfortunate circumstances, it can happen to most of us, including the most cautious and prepared.
rickdugan
2 years ago
@Warrior: Too funny. I too engage in much philanthropy, with strippers OTC more than SA girls, but the same principles apply. It's a noble calling to be sure. 😉

But this gal would much rather be in that hole than accept that sort of....let's call it "help"...lol. It is what it is. As is well known around here, I'm the first guy to show his more charitable side to a pretty girl in need of an earning opportunity, but I'm not even going down that road with this one. In any event she's not remotely confused about the fact that she has that option with me if she wants it.
motorhead
2 years ago
Are we sure drugs aren’t involved?

The ones I’ve seen, that’s the case, even if it’s well hidden
rickdugan
2 years ago
@Motor: That's a fair question and one I don't know the answer to. If it is drugs it's well hidden, but anything is possible. Lately the drug suppliers have been lacing coke with fentanyl to make it more addictive and the JAX clubs have hardly been immune to the impacts of that.
Mate27
2 years ago
Tell her to drive until she qualifies for a place that fits her budget. I know some girls commuting up to an hour or more several days a week, and carpool to match. I’m not inclined to pull much more info out of them, but some also have Internal Revenue Service problems to boot because of similar learning curve situations.
Icee Loco (asshole)
2 years ago
It's not even about living above your means. With these prices it's getting impossible. Rents can't keep going up indefinitely. Neither can food prices.

My bills have tripled without me doing anything. I wouldn't put the blame kn people
drewcareypnw
2 years ago
One little fuckup can put an average earner into a tailspin. Lose your job, or worse: get sick, then you can lose your housing, followed by car, etc, all with the credit guys after you. At each bump down that road, it gets harder to get back to earning and then back to your prior state. Agree with Shailynn, 1 year of reserve is the right amount. Also, having a partner who is a good earner, saving, being cautious, avoiding dangerous habits and reckless people, all help to mitigate this risk. Of course that's not a likely plan for your average dancer!

It's a Doggy-Dog world out there.
georgmicrodong
2 years ago
Haven't see one directly, but seen a few on Facebook go that route. One of them is my current regular. She never got really bad, and shes getting back on her feet now, so she probably won't need me much longer, but at the moment, I'm seeing her often enough to pay her rent.
docsavage
2 years ago
Something like this eventually happens to a lot of strippers. Even if the economy is good, everyone gets older and their looks slowly fade and then their money drops. Someone future oriented makes plans ahead of time but many young people haven't experienced enough of life yet to know they need to do that. I went through a rough period in my twenties. The lessons you learn in your twenties are valuable later in life.
Htxx
2 years ago
Bad choices and clock ticking. Hotness fades but stupidity is forever. I’m always being solicited to “help” sometimes I do. Sometimes I don’t. To many options out there for a mid 50’s guy with a few bucks to play with
goldmongerATL
2 years ago
It is not just strippers. I see lots of <30 women struggle because they have been coddled. One I know in late 20's still lives with parents and has zero savings despite making close to 6 figures with no expenses (parents provide car, food, housing etc.). Her social media shows her partying at high buck places almost every night.

Could see it coming. Parents got her an emergency credit card in college. Within 48 hours it was over its limit. $2000 on shoes and handbags in one day. Of course they paid it off.
goldmongerATL
2 years ago
Apparently the "less than" sign cuts off your post!
goldmongerATL
2 years ago
Try again. It is not just strippers. I see lots of UNDER 30 people struggle because they have been coddled. I know a woman in her late 20's that still lives with her parents, who provide car, housing and food. She earns approaching six figures and has no savings. Her social media shows her partying at high buck clubs most nights.

You could see it coming. In college dad was constantly paying off her emergency credit card because of shopping sprees. Does a girl in college really NEED a $1200 purse and $500 shoes? How about that $400 bar tab for a 19 year old?
drewcareypnw
2 years ago
@gold: Yeah. Though I don't know any dancers well enough to have seen this first hand, it does seem from IG like they are often chasing expensive luxury products and experiences. Stuff that would eat up a regular earner's savings quickly.
goldmongerATL
2 years ago
Some of them are influencer wannabe's. I know a woman who buys expensive shit and posts coupon codes on IG. Proud to tell me she got the $500 dress for only $450 net because she made $50 from posting it on IG. Wears it once or twice and sells it for $300 on some site linked to her IG. So the dress cost her $150 to wear once or twice. There is this whole buy-post-wear-sell economy going on with women's clothes.

I think a pair of jeans cost me about 15 cents every time I wear them.
Icee Loco (asshole)
2 years ago
Girls don't pay to party. They get on guest lists.

$1200 is cheap for a bag. And remember the matching waRitch.

Shoes are more like $900

You're out of touch with reality thinking young people struggle coz they act nigga ritch.

And you don't know anyone's real income. Life is hard af coz old conservatives ruined america
Icee Loco (asshole)
2 years ago
Buy post sell is.more common with men ie sneakerheads and hype beasts
skibum609
2 years ago
^Ritch? Fucking ignorant douchebag. We know you have no income you fucking dirty semen stain. Fucking scumbag fraud and liar.
twentyfive
2 years ago
^ Watching Iceefag go off the rails is fun, it’s a guilty pleasure of mine.
rickmacrodong
2 years ago
What is nigga ritch?

“. Don't get me wrong, she's sexy as hell and I'd gladly give her an avenue to earn if that option opened up, but I already know that it won't. I already know from a couple of historical drunken deep dives with her that she's got heavy-weight personal baggage that makes it a hard non-starter for her. Indeed if she could get herself to do that she probably wouldn't be in this position in the first place as she wouldn't lack for potential partners.”

What kind of baggage would make someone unable to do OTC? I thought it was the opposite, that girls with more baggage are doing the OTC and escorting?
rickmacrodong
2 years ago
Goldmonger couldn’t they just return the dress to where they bought it from
drewcareypnw
2 years ago
Icee you complain about the conservatives on here and go around dropping the n-bomb. You're not even black. Lame.
Icee Loco (asshole)
2 years ago
You're lame.
Icee Loco (asshole)
2 years ago
It's just funny how cheap some of you are. Don't even know how much designer ahit costs. And act like yo7ng people live beyond their means while you're scouring clubs for bargain priced pussy
rickmacrodong
2 years ago
There are designer shoes that are $200, $500 and also $900.

It’s laughable you accuse someone of not knowing about designer shit because they referenced a $1200 purse and $500 shoes. There are plenty of designer items in that range, if you’re talking about the most expensive designer stuff then its far beyond $900 shoes you quoted.

A $1200 purse isnt cheap even to a billionaire. To a thief who can steal anything he pleases, anything is cheap because it’s all free and $0.

Yeah obviously the person who’s paying all the bills and expenses and scouring clubs for pussy is better off than someone in debt and spending money on designer stuff, high end cars etc.

And bargain priced is relative. Pornstars and ig models with millions of fans charge $1000+ an hour, but you feel this is an offensive “cheap” rate for a stripper.
skibum609
2 years ago
^douchebag of the year.
goldmongerATL
2 years ago
I guess i have to unblock a couple of people to read the whole thread.
goldmongerATL
2 years ago
Well, I know where she works and what people with her experience in her position make in general. I also know her parents and Dad told me what she spent on certain items that showed up on the bill he had to pay.

In short, I know much more about that specific situation than you ever will.
Icee Loco (asshole)
2 years ago
Cacaplop you're out of touch with reality. And I'm a thief? No but you're an icel troll
rickmacrodong
2 years ago
Youve admitted to being a thief, and have said many pro scamming pro finessing comments. It means nothing having money or anything materialistic if you stole it. If you see a lambo on the street and steal it or pickpocket the keys from the owner and take it, it really means nothing
Icee Loco (asshole)
2 years ago
I haven't said it. Go troll someone else
shailynn
2 years ago
Icee aren’t you supposed to OD on Fentanyl soon?
Icee Loco (asshole)
2 years ago
I'd never touch that shit. It's worse than the crack epidemic. Shouldn't you be dick riding the dead deadbeat dad...troll
Cashman1234
2 years ago
I’ve not gotten into the details of many dancers personal situations, so I don’t have experience with dancers going down that path.

However, I worked for AT&T during the late 1980’s, and I saw lots of folks get hit hard during the post divestiture years of layoffs. There were many folks who had good jobs with AT&T and living at or above their means. In NJ there are some beautiful towns in Morris county. Those areas aren’t cheap.

Back in the old days, the phone company was a monopoly and they could raise rates. Things changed dramatically when they broke up the phone company. Some folks did very well, but many didn’t plan (especially in the ways Shailynn described) so they suffered. Lots of folks had to sell homes and start renting - or move to less expensive areas.
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