Your First Time / How was it ?

With a female next-door neighbor in my early twenties. She invited me to come over and watch television with her and we ended up having sex. She looked a little unhappy afterwards. I asked her if she wanted to go out to dinner with me sometime and she got a big smile on her face. I think they often like it if you call the next day or show some interest in seeing them again.

I don’t kiss and tell.

^ Sex is like skydiving , you don’t need a parachute to sky dive, unless you want to do it more than once, so yeah a call is nice.

I was 13. In my bed. With my girlfriend. No condom. I must have lasted a good solid minute. I did my first threesome with her and a neighbor girl one week later. 9th grade rocked. Full disclosure: I turned 14 2 months later.

TUSCL + {this topic} + "Be honest here. I want the truth." = zenith of internet optimism

Civvy or paid. The first time. Civvie

1. How old were you ? 12
2. Did you use a condom ? Nope
3. How long did you last ? A few minutes

A girl I had a crush on asked me to come over after school.

It felt good physically. But I couldn't get why people made such a big deal out of it . Especially out of losing ones virginity. It felt nice but nothing like what people made of it. But it taught me how easy it is to get sex as long as you're what a girl likes.

Yeah 18 after high school though. What a weight off my chest to lose the V card. Yes I had a condom. It was awesome for me but the sex was probably terrible for her. She actually pretty good looking but after that would be the fat chick era for me. No idea what I was doing. I remember I thought my dick would just automatically go in, no you gotta like put in the there. I know it looks like a slot from the outside but it’s really a hole.

I’ll let you know. I’ve heard “warm apple pie” but that was at band camp.

When Iwas 16 my car broke down in front of the Playboy Mansion. Hef invited me in while I waited for a tow truck. One thing led to another and the Swedish Bikini Team offered to show me around. We ended up skinny dipping in that water filled grotto and I did them all, twice! Hef sent a messenger to tell me that the tow truck was out front and I said fuck it they can keep the car. I ended up living there until I was 18.

^^^Lol oh shit

OK. The Buck-eye came up with the best story !!! But I would have never left that Grotto !

Lol

Damn if I hadn’t been sworn to secrecy I’d be bragging

I waited until I turned 18 before plucking that tree ripened banana off the tree, taping up the peel with duct tape and a quick 15 seconds in the microwave. Unbelievably warm, and I'm still with her today.

This is one post SJG won’t be able to comment on, unless intercorse with a goat counts.

Oh sure he can, he can just dream shit up like he does through all of his other ramblings.

First time I got a blowjob I was 22, paid, with condom. The whole time I was amazed that it was actually happening.

First time I had sex was civvie I had a few dates with, with condom. Lasted a few minutes, but warmed her up with plenty of oral so she had already came. Nice girl, pretty vanilla in the sack though. It was the few after that who expanded my repertoire.

Unless you're a truly pathetic incel or the actually couldnt get laid in a morgue, there is no reason to lie in your response.

17, summer break of my junior year with my first, steady, long-term relationship. I used a condom, lasted 20 min becauae of it. I waa disappointed that the world did not look or feel different afterwards.

She had told me she lost her virginity at age 15. We had sex two more times before things went south. There was some vlood the first and second times. Neither of us understood why. It wasn't until I deflowered a virgin near 10 years kater that I uhderstood. Connie was also a virgin. I wish she had been honest with me. I would have skipped the rubber for at least the hymen breaking.

When I was young (and in middle school) my dad got to go on a lot of cool conferences/conventions all over the country. In the summer sometimes he would bring my mom and I. I met two girls at one of these which was located at a nice resort and I spent the entire week hanging out with these two girls. As a kid in middle school they both were hot to me, I liked them both but this one was just really aggressive, on the slutty side, and she was 2 years older than me. She had the body of a college girl with a huge rack, but was still slim, average looking face. After spending a week together every night we would go a little further and further. 1st base, 2nd base, 3rd base. She knew I was inexperienced and had no problem showing me the ropes. On the last night there was a big banquet so our parents were tied up until at least 11pm. All three of us had dinner at one of the restaurants and then went back to my parents room. She knew I was a virgin and walked me through it under the covers while her friend laid in the next bed watching TV. Condom yes, how long I lasted? Maybe 5 minutes, I’m sure if I hit it raw it would have been 30 seconds. We exchanged letters a few times after that (she lived in a different time zone several states away from me) and then lost contact. Over the years I tried to find her over the internet (remember her full name, and city/state she was from) with no such luck.

My biggest fear when we were done was that the room smelled like pussy and I was afraid my parents would find out. I blasted the A/C on high when I left the room and figured my parents would be half lit by the time they came back to the room anyway. Luckily after I walked the girls back to the room and back to mine the smell was gone. Always felt bad for the other girl, I would have fooled around with her too but I thought I shouldn’t press my luck and risk falling out with the slutty one.

She was my first, I was not her first!

22 and paid for a bit with a condom 😭😭😂😂😂😂🤡🤡🤡

I want to hear gawker or shadowcats story. Things had to be different then.

^ Told you I was a late bloomer. Could have gotten bareback anal from your stripper sister for less if only I'd have known.

"DRACO!" I shouted. "What the fuck do you think you are doing?"

Draco didn't answer but he stopped the flying car and he walked out of it. I walked out of it too, curiously.

"What the fucking hell?" I asked angrily.

"Ebony?" he asked.

"What?" I snapped.

Draco leaned in extra-close and I looked into his gothic red eyes (he was wearing color contacts) which revealed so much depressing sorrow and evilness and then suddenly I didn't feel mad anymore.

And then... suddenly just as I Draco kissed me passionately. Draco climbed on top of me and we started to make out keenly against a tree. He took of my top and I took of his clothes. I even took of my bra. Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time.

"Oh! Oh! Oh!" I screamed. I was beginning to get an orgasm. We started to kiss everywhere and my pale body became all warm. And then...

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERFUKERS!"

It was...Dumbledore!

It’s amazing how much notoriety that fanfic had. Also amazing, back when that account was still available on fanfiction.net, did you know the password to the author’s account was literally “tara”?

I used to write some fanfics back in the day…not going to go down memory lane and re-read whatever cringeworthy thing I made. But on the plus side, I did avoid using Evanescence long lyrics in them 😎

@nice copy and paste them on here as article please please please.

Middle aged virgin here