Uber drivers

avatar for 3131
3131
Uber driver told me I smell like cheap perfume. Not sure how to wash that off before I get home.

17 comments

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avatar for wallanon
wallanon
3 years ago
Back when I had to care, a little oopsie at the gas pump was a last resort if I couldn't get the stripper out before getting home. But if you're not driving, smelly food to go was also on the shortlist. In the lap for a few mins and up by the collar.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
3 years ago
@heaving

I assume it's an issue for the OP bc he may have a S.O. at home
avatar for misterorange
misterorange
3 years ago
@ heaving

You are a fucking faggot.
avatar for shailynn
shailynn
3 years ago
Two things that will usually over power perfume.

Your own cologne

Cigarette or cigar smoke. If you don’t smoke (I don’t) but I often go to casinos and all the casinos in my vicinity, if you walk into them for 5 seconds you will walk out smelling like you’ve smoke a pack of menthols.
avatar for wallanon
wallanon
3 years ago
Some guys dab cologne all day so that might work. I stopped wearing cologne years ago after a future ex insisted on buying me a brand she liked. I've seen dudes at the club shower themselves in that stuff at the sink and I'm wondering how they explain smelling like 9am at 2am in a different cologne. That and how much overspray got me just trying to wash my hands after taking a piss. I don't smoke, and now that indoor smoking is outlawed most places I'd have a work reason to be that one also go dropped. But if it fits with the lifestyle then cigs are a decent option.
avatar for Electronman
Electronman
3 years ago
Get a gym membership so you can take a shower before heading home to the SO. And stash away a change of clothes.

Better yet, refuse a dance with any girl who wears perfume or glitter.
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
3 years ago
This is a tricky situation if you have a SO at home. The suggestions posted above should help. The best thing is to take a shower and wash your clothes - as soon as you get home.

If you have a SO, she may already know?
avatar for Dolfan
Dolfan
3 years ago
Blame the Uber driver? It smelt like puke in there so the driver kept spraying this cheap perfume to cover it up. Not a repeatable technique, but maybe good enough to get you out of a jam. Or go Trump style and tell her SHE smells like cheap perfume.
avatar for whodey
whodey
3 years ago
When I had a significant other to worry about I would always keep a small bottle of febreeze in my car for those situations. Even if you took an Uber you can stop by your car on the way in when you get home.
avatar for wallanon
wallanon
3 years ago
The gym routine is also workable for guys who aren't lazy slobs. But to be a lazy slob is an inalienable right, is it not? I, too, am a lazy slob so that'd cause more questions than it solved if I suddenly started going to the gym yet stayed out of shape.
avatar for Icee Loco (asshole)
Icee Loco (asshole)
3 years ago
Get your wife some Victoria's secret body sprays so she smells like stripper hoes lulz
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
3 years ago
You could tell your SO that your Uber driver was a part time stripper who just got off work, and the entire car smelled like a strip club.

As long as you don’t tip the Uber driver $200 - she shouldn’t expect you got crazy on the ride.
avatar for Charles Paisley
Charles Paisley
3 years ago
Two years of Covid and you don't carry a portable pack of sanitary wipes with you? /smh
avatar for wallanon
wallanon
3 years ago
Those wipes don't work that well on natural fibers, and depending on the brand leave a little something behind until you wash them. In a code red situation I'd rather do a quickie wash in a restaurant or gas station bathroom with a locking door and an air dryer. So I've heard. I've never tried to wipe my clothes down with unscented sanitary wipes or anything...and I've definitely never hand washed my shirt in a restaurant bathroom making others do the pee pee dance while I get the stripper off.
avatar for Charles Paisley
Charles Paisley
3 years ago
Medi-Wipes are only for cleaning the skin, obviously, from any make-up, lipstick or perfume/lotion transfer.

So I'm guessing you don't have a "go" bag in your car, with a change of clothes for strip clubs, and then change back and clean up once you're done in the club. This stuff is so Strip Club 101 to me I don't even think about it anymore.

avatar for wallanon
wallanon
3 years ago
The question was what to do if you end up with an unexpected problem with your clothing, not how do you avoid the problem in the first place. This is a friendly chat, Chili, nobody is doubting your know how.

But to answer your question, I had enough drama where I didn't need extra clothes around. If I knew my outfit needed a stunt double I'd buy something cheap but passable then toss it on the way to wherever I needed to not smell like stripper and pussy. For the price of a lap dance I've got one less thing to deal with. As the saying goes, there's levels to this.
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