Back when I had to care, a little oopsie at the gas pump was a last resort if I couldn't get the stripper out before getting home. But if you're not driving, smelly food to go was also on the shortlist. In the lap for a few mins and up by the collar.
Two things that will usually over power perfume.
Your own cologne
Cigarette or cigar smoke. If you don’t smoke (I don’t) but I often go to casinos and all the casinos in my vicinity, if you walk into them for 5 seconds you will walk out smelling like you’ve smoke a pack of menthols.
Some guys dab cologne all day so that might work. I stopped wearing cologne years ago after a future ex insisted on buying me a brand she liked. I've seen dudes at the club shower themselves in that stuff at the sink and I'm wondering how they explain smelling like 9am at 2am in a different cologne. That and how much overspray got me just trying to wash my hands after taking a piss. I don't smoke, and now that indoor smoking is outlawed most places I'd have a work reason to be that one also go dropped. But if it fits with the lifestyle then cigs are a decent option.
Get a gym membership so you can take a shower before heading home to the SO. And stash away a change of clothes.
Better yet, refuse a dance with any girl who wears perfume or glitter.
This is a tricky situation if you have a SO at home. The suggestions posted above should help. The best thing is to take a shower and wash your clothes - as soon as you get home.
If you have a SO, she may already know?
Blame the Uber driver? It smelt like puke in there so the driver kept spraying this cheap perfume to cover it up. Not a repeatable technique, but maybe good enough to get you out of a jam. Or go Trump style and tell her SHE smells like cheap perfume.
When I had a significant other to worry about I would always keep a small bottle of febreeze in my car for those situations. Even if you took an Uber you can stop by your car on the way in when you get home.
The gym routine is also workable for guys who aren't lazy slobs. But to be a lazy slob is an inalienable right, is it not? I, too, am a lazy slob so that'd cause more questions than it solved if I suddenly started going to the gym yet stayed out of shape.
You could tell your SO that your Uber driver was a part time stripper who just got off work, and the entire car smelled like a strip club.
As long as you don’t tip the Uber driver $200 - she shouldn’t expect you got crazy on the ride.
Those wipes don't work that well on natural fibers, and depending on the brand leave a little something behind until you wash them. In a code red situation I'd rather do a quickie wash in a restaurant or gas station bathroom with a locking door and an air dryer. So I've heard. I've never tried to wipe my clothes down with unscented sanitary wipes or anything...and I've definitely never hand washed my shirt in a restaurant bathroom making others do the pee pee dance while I get the stripper off.
Medi-Wipes are only for cleaning the skin, obviously, from any make-up, lipstick or perfume/lotion transfer.
So I'm guessing you don't have a "go" bag in your car, with a change of clothes for strip clubs, and then change back and clean up once you're done in the club. This stuff is so Strip Club 101 to me I don't even think about it anymore.
The question was what to do if you end up with an unexpected problem with your clothing, not how do you avoid the problem in the first place. This is a friendly chat, Chili, nobody is doubting your know how.
But to answer your question, I had enough drama where I didn't need extra clothes around. If I knew my outfit needed a stunt double I'd buy something cheap but passable then toss it on the way to wherever I needed to not smell like stripper and pussy. For the price of a lap dance I've got one less thing to deal with. As the saying goes, there's levels to this.
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