strippers on social media a turn off?

joewebber
Georgia
before social media, and before the internet was popular, strippers used to have the air of mystery about them.
as customers, we hardly ever heard about their private lives.

when being a single mom no longer had a stigma attached to it, the percentage of career-minded strippers going to college working in the club went down, and the percentage of single moms with two or more 'baby-daddies' went up.

instead of strippers working your mind to make you think they're attracted to you, they now go for your pity. 'i've got 4 kids at home, and i won't be able to make the rent unless i make $500 tonight'

social media has added to this. i have added several strippers to a generic Instagram account, and i can definitely say that seeing their social lives on social media is a turn off.

from needless cosmetic treatments (lashes, nails, injections, tattoos), to partying wildly even during the middle of the pandemic in 2020.
some make baseless political statements. some flash their $$, cars, purses. some smoke weed, lip-syching to the latest rap song, while driving down the street.

maybe *I* am old-fashioned now. or maybe this generation of strippers has just gotten dumber and less attractive.

44 comments

Latest

  • PipeHerArcher
    3 years ago
    This is most young women on social media unfortunately.
  • GoddessZora
    3 years ago
    Thank God we all aren’t like that 😮‍💨😮‍💨
  • Icee Loco (asshole)
    3 years ago
    You want young women to be prudes who stay at home and only go to work to whore themselves out to old men?
  • Call.Me.Ishmael
    3 years ago
    ^^^ That's not what is being said, but it sure is a fine way to troll for unnecessary drama.
  • Call.Me.Ishmael
    3 years ago
    Some dancer's social media is not appealing, but some definitely is appealing (and useful when they volunteer their club schedule).

    In all cases, it's none of my business and my choice to follow or not.
  • ElDuderino_AZ
    3 years ago
    I do remember one texting me in the summer of 2020, while clubs and bars were closed, asking for money once. But I don't ever remember not being able to pay bills being a selling point from a girl who had taken a seat at my table.

    Believe it or not, pre-social media, girls in their 20s still partied and bought themselves things. That's nothing new.

    But there's a very simple solution here, similar to other things in life: if you don't like Joe Rogan, don't listen to him; if you don't like the news, don't watch it; and if you don't like seeing their lives outside of stripping...stop adding their social media accounts. Problem solved.
  • Subraman
    3 years ago
    In the past I've been on any number of my CFs' social media, and at least on a personal account, it is not the prototypical "tiktok attention whore" style. Don't get me wrong, wild things showed up even on personal social media for sure, they're strippers, they're wild, they like showing off money to each other, etc. But for girls with a public "stripper social media", many times they're following other advice on tiktok to build a brand. So what's going on is: What you described is basic-bitch tiktok style sex worker brand outreach social media now. It's just how it's done.
    The types of strippers who have public social media that is brand-oriented, are the most likely to follow that style of social media

    Ever since I started getting stripper social media years ago, I noticed pretty quickly that there is a huge difference between a private social media account, and as heaving calls it, "stripper social media account", with girls who have the latter more likely to be the classic professional stripper uber hustlers.

    In other words, there's a particular style of social media that you're describing, that is brand-oriented, although like you I don't get the appeal one tiny bit, maybe it appeals to younger men? It certainly seems significantly aimed at other young women, and perhaps that's part of it also. Stripper personal social media is not like this, though still wilder than your average girl
  • nicespice
    3 years ago
    There were two clubs I went to because I wanted to try them out, One told me right at the door, the only way to get an audition to contact the club via Instagram and be directly invited in. And other one I was told I could work day, and be introduced to the nightshift manager, but warned without followers I’d probably be stuck on dayshift.

    Idk if it’s just those places or that’s a trend that’s going to keep taking off as time goes on.

    Not surprised if a lot of posts from dancers are more about materialism and cosmetic procedures and manicures with less more obvious posts of “I’m a sex worker, enjoy my ass!” Instagram isn’t shy about shadow banning or even outright account deletion.
  • shadowcat
    3 years ago
    It's funny that you chose right now to bring that up. I have never posted on any social media other than TUSCL but I do scan FB & IG. Last week I got a text message from a dancer that I was seeing OTC prior to Covid. She said she missed me and included partially nude photos. It has me considering renewing our relationship.

    Then I saw her posts on FB about spending Valentines day with her baby daddy and how much she loves him and photos of the necklace he gave her. How could she miss me? :)
  • doctorevil
    3 years ago
    Why do so many dancers pose in social media pictures by showing the camera their middle finger?
  • Icee Loco (asshole)
    3 years ago
    You're surprised that the hookers you pay have lives ?

    IG is a part of life now. Snd what's posted about lives is worth taking with a grain of salt. Partying doesn't mean they're paying for the night out. Money doesn't mean they're not broke. Signs of a happy relationship doesn't mean it's good. Usually people will almost post the opposite of reality on there.
  • Call.Me.Ishmael
    3 years ago
    Eh. They'll tell you *a* life story in 10 minutes, but it's rarely *their* life story.
  • Icee Loco (asshole)
    3 years ago
    CIM why should she tell you anything personal? You're just a customer buying a fantasy.
  • Call.Me.Ishmael
    3 years ago
    I don't believe they should. I was responding to Scrub's belief that they do this.
  • Call.Me.Ishmael
    3 years ago
    On occasion, I've thought that a dancer might be telling me a heavily-redacted version, etc. But, usually I treat it as fiction until I see something that strongly indicates otherwise. And all of that is fine. It's none of my business.
  • joewebber
    3 years ago
    some clarification is necessary.

    air of mystery refers to the past when strippers would NOT tell you their life story when they sat down next to you. there really was a time when this happened.

    the social media posts of people partying at clubs in 2020 mask-less, sharing hookah pipes, etc when everyone was supposed to be sheltering in place because of a virus that affects your RESPIRATORY system (repeat hookah pipes) was the turn off.

    the social media posts of strippers doing other stupid things (driving while smoking weed and looking at their phone), is a turn off.

    social media posts of strippers and their average home life is NOT a turnoff.
    social media posts of stripper having a good time partying NOW is not a turnoff.

  • joewebber
    3 years ago
    another note-
    i wasn't complaining about having to look at their social media. i was asking you all if seeing other aspects of their lives through social media was a turnoff?
  • Call.Me.Ishmael
    3 years ago
    If I wanted to walk into a building where I will approve of everyone's life choices, I probably would steer clear of strip clubs.

    I hear what you're saying, but all of that toothpaste is out of the tube now. If you don't like a dancer's social media, then don't follow it. If you don't want to hear her life story (fictional or not), then change the topic of conversation.
  • Icee Loco (asshole)
    3 years ago
    Joe webber that's just girls. It has nothing to do with them being strippers
  • jackslash
    3 years ago
    Hey you strippers and whippersnappers! Get off my lawn!
  • ElDuderino_AZ
    3 years ago
    What the slushy drink said.
  • Cashman1234
    3 years ago
    I understand the OP doesn’t find certain aspects of dancer social media very attractive. The basic solution is to avoid checking dancer social media.

    If a dancer is a young adult, and has a few kids, a few baby daddies, and posts photos of spending her earnings on items that aren’t very worthwhile, then you might be seeing why she’s caught in a cycle of dancing to make rent and buy diapers. There’s nothing wrong with that, it’s how she lives her life.

    I agree, it might be smart to have a personal Instagram account - and a professional one. But, that’s not always how dancers do it.

    In my view, you enjoy your experience with a dancer ITC. You leave it ITC. If you sniff around to find out more about a dancer, there’s little good to come from it.
  • Cashman1234
    3 years ago
    I don’t think dancers who show their kids and boyfriends on social media are doing it to elicit money through pity.

    They have shared their social media account with you so you can keep in touch, and they can let you know when and where they are working.
  • ElDuderino_AZ
    3 years ago
    I'm curious about whether the OP went to clubs during 2020, or paid girls for sex during 2020, etc., since it was a turn off to see girls living their own lives (partying, hookah, etc.); they weren't the ones at risk.
  • shailynn
    3 years ago
    I got off of social media for this exact reason. There was a time, if you had an account on Facebook you looked like a jerk if you didn't accept a "friend" request from someone. So there I am, 2,500+ friends, coworkers, my wife's friends' husband I barely know, the guy whose work path crosses mine, etc. etc. Some people feel the need to share every intimate detail about themselves on social media. Political, religion, etc. and there's a lot I do not want to know that was somewhat forced upon me when I'm casually viewing FB just to kill some time. Lots of drama over the years. Coworkers having a fight over FB instead of face to face. A few divorces unfold on FB. I thought it was time to quit not worry how other peoples lives play out on a computer.

    To note, I am only here for stripper advice from Subraman and poker advice from Juice.
  • Subraman
    3 years ago
    "There were two clubs I went to because I wanted to try them out, One told me right at the door, the only way to get an audition to contact the club via Instagram and be directly invited in. And other one I was told I could work day, and be introduced to the nightshift manager, but warned without followers I’d probably be stuck on dayshift. "

    That is super interesting spice! Many years ago, my then-ATF told me she wanted to audition at a new club, and asked if she and my buddies would all walk in with her. I told her sure, but what's the point? She said she wanted to show management she could bring a whole bunch of good spending customers with her. It was an interesting approach I thought! Now of course, you can show management that virtually I suppose, with having lots of followers.
  • NinaBambina
    3 years ago
    "One told me right at the door, the only way to get an audition to contact the club via Instagram and be directly invited in. And other one I was told I could work day, and be introduced to the nightshift manager, but warned without followers I’d probably be stuck on dayshift."

    That is so fucking stupid. I wonder what type of clientele they must have to be so social media/IG focused. I would think a "make it rain" type of club would be more likely to incorporate IG into their hiring standards. Makes me curious what club this was.

    It's absolutely ridiculous, especially considering that there are plenty of girls who understandably want to be discreet about their identity. I wouldn't want to work at a club like that, out of fear I might end up on someone's IG half naked without my consent. Also, I don't do IG.
  • ilbbaicnl
    3 years ago
    Hopefully it's rare that clubs try to force dancers to sacrifice their privacy on the internet. If dancers ask for a boycott of clubs who do that, I'll participate.

    It's more healthy that we don't get too deep into our fantasies. Dancers do have private lives. A good dancer will be mysterious for you if that's what you want, but why are you looking for her on social media if that's what you want? Let her be less mysterious with other PLs, if she chooses to do that, and that's how she banks best with them.
  • JamesSD
    3 years ago
    Smart strippers keep their personal and professional Instagram accounts separate.

    Professional account should be thirst traps, when she's working, maybe some memes about boobs, sec and stripping. Maybe vacation photos especially if it's her ass in a thong in front of something pretty.

    Keep the kids, etc separate.
  • nicespice
    3 years ago
    @Nina

    The two clubs:
    https://tuscl.net/listing.php?id=3432
    https://tuscl.net/listing.php?id=1728

    Yeah idk if that’s something they always require, or are doing that just because when I was out there the club scene was slower than it normally would be. One of the clubs is definitely a more make it rain kind of place. I really wanted to go there more just for the heck of it because I’ve never been in that kind of environment, but if the barrier to get in the door is that high…NOPE. That and the dayshift manager was asking me questions like whether or not I was single and had me sit at the bar and encouraged me to order a drink. Umm okay, I’m not interested in being in this club anymore but sure I’ll order a hard seltzer and contribute to whatever pitiful earnings the bartender will get so I can just at least observe the sad shit show in a large empty beautiful club. Honestly that place probably shouldn’t even bother having a dayshift. And the most head scratching part was observing this slender thin white girl with a pretty face and idk why she would put up with such a dead environment instead of bailing and going to one of the clubs in Scottsdale or another club in that area that’s famous for its pickiness. Super weird!

    Also, ditto. I don’t do Instagram either. I can see the logic that it would be a good idea, but I don’t like taking selfies and putting in the effort for that.

    @subra: Interesting stuff there. I’ve always had the impression a lot of managers hire who they want and the crowd doesn’t matter. But that stuff probably doesn’t hurt if nervous about getting into a place. 😋




  • joewebber
    3 years ago
    "I'm curious about whether the OP went to clubs during 2020, or paid girls for sex during 2020, etc., since it was a turn off to see girls living their own lives (partying, hookah, etc.); they weren't the ones at risk."

    I didn't. i sheltered in place until the mandates in my state were lifted. and i was very guarded afterward with people that threw caution to the wind while the pandemic was wreaking havoc across the country.
  • ElDuderino_AZ
    3 years ago
    Ah, well then good, not hypocritical.

    Strippers are young, healthy, not obese, etc., among the lowest-risk of anybody. If 100,000 of them caught it, 99,999 would be fine. As long as they weren't out partying the night before and going to grandma's house the next day...more power to 'em. Can't blame people in their 20s and 30s living like people in their 20s and 30s. It wasn't ebola.
  • san_jose_guy
    3 years ago
    True, once you have the ability to contact them outside of the club, the air of mystery is gone. And she is pretty close to being your escort already. Even is she were not inclined to do this, someone would have eventually gotten to her.

    And then once she gets comfortable with that, she will come to want UHM ITC, as that is the most simple and it rakes in the money the fastest.

    But I think it is not really the Internet which caused this change, it is cell phones. Easier to change phone numbers and call blocking. Women used to be much more restrictive with their phone numbers.

    I still would not suggest contacting a girl just because of pictures online. I think F2F first meetings is best. You want her to see that you have selected her and you want her to feel that in her bones. That still goes a long way.

    SJG

    Jefferson Starship - Miracles
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iH_55j-O…
  • Icee Loco (asshole)
    3 years ago
    Lots of girls have just 1 profile and it's easy to block people from seeing stories or limiting interaction. It's not complicated.
  • Papi_Chulo
    3 years ago
    Many of us on here are middle-age or more – most of us also live lives, and had upbringings, that are fairly different that the lives and upbringings of many dancers.

    Thus the combo of us being at a different stage in life; plus the fact we live different lives; and often have had different upbringings, means we are often not gonna have much in common w/ many dancers or how they live their lives; it’s kinda the nature-of-the-beast.

    As others, I don’t do social-media mainly b/c it never really attracted/interested me – by social media I’m referring to things like FB, IG, Twitter, etc – I used to PM w/ a TUSCLer that liked looking at the social-media of dancers and in past years we’d PM more often and from time to time he’d share some pages of dancers he followed – I found it somewhat interesting but not interesting enough for me to follow dancers on social media out of my own volition – the few personal dancer pages I saw I didn’t find that interesting – the few I saw that were their dancer social media page I found somewhat a bit more interesting mainly b/c of the sexy pics or vids - but in the end I accept that for multiple reasons I don’t have much in common w/ most dancers whether it’d be age; or the fact I’ve never been a big “party guy”; nor have I even done any type of drugs, nor was ever a big-drinker, etc.

    As I’ve often posted, to me strip-clubs are bizarro-world and I accept them for what they are and what they are not – I can’t change them (obviously); so I long ago learned to check my preconceived-ideas or personal-believes at the strip-club door; and I’ve tried to not judge the way others live their lives b/c we all live our lives “our way” and not everyone that looks at the way we live our lives would agree that we are living our lives the best way (w/e way that may be) – so my attitude is that if I choose to live my live a certain way, then others have the same choice – I may not think they are doing it right, and some may not think I’m doing it right – at the end of the day if we are not harming one another then it’s my life and it’s their life.
  • Papi_Chulo
    3 years ago
    Every generation before has thought the current generation is “messed up” in some way – one can perhaps assume that the proliferation of social-media has either accelerated the difference b/w generations, or maybe just amplified-them/made-them-more-obvious – one would assume today's 20-somethigns are gonna be looking at the 20-somethings of the year 2050 and have issue w/ those future 20-somethings.

    Safe to assume many dancers have always lived topsy-turvy lives; it’s just that pre-social-media that was often out-of-sight thus out-of-mind and we only saw their “work persona” at the club.

    As one dancer posted on TUSCL once, “good girls don’t become strippers” – thus seeing how many live their lives outside the club or on social media should not be a shock; again kinda the nature-of-the-beast.

    I also wonder if rap/hiphop culture is not a big influence w.r.t. how many of these girls live and act – at the end of the day hiphop came from the streets and it has glorified and to a certain extent normalized living a certain lifestyle - hiphop having been the dominant art-form over the last 2-decades or so it likely has influenced how many of these young strippers live their lives – those of us that are middle-age or more and/or are straight-laced have little to no connection with hiphop and our lives are not influenced by it in any way at it may be for certain strippers and thus the large disconnect.

    My comments of course at not meant to imply every dancer lives a crazy life of weed and partying and chaos whether financial or o/w, but that many do seem to fall under one or more of these categories and that may be the ones that just happen to also be putting their biz out on social-media.

    I assume the OP is like many of on here who are middle-age or more; have a career/job and work every day (or did b/f they retired); are responsible w.r.t. how we live our lives and our finances; are not big partiers nor drug-users nor heavy-drinkers, etc – and of course the OP, like most of us, will often have little-in-common w/ most strippers that are of a different generation, and social media will often just showcase/exasperate those differences b/w an avg middle-aged-guy and a 20-something stripper (and again, not saying that every stripper lives the type of life we see on some of these social-media pages).

    At the end of the day we can't/shouldn't expect a 20-something stripper that likely grew-up on hiphop, to act, think, or live, like most of us middle-aged or more guys on here - one just has to accept what is is and that there are multiple factors at play.
  • PinkSugarDoll
    3 years ago
    I do not have the time/energy/desire to make a stripper IG and I do not need a club putting my face or access to things about me in plain view. And while we are at it, what those clubs are doing is getting girls to market on their behalf, for free.

    My privacy and my safety are 99999 times more important than working in those clubs. Honestly, the audacity.
  • Icee Loco (asshole)
    3 years ago
    Girls just post the sexy party girl stuff but can be homebodies 90% of the time in real life. Ig doesn't show reality
  • Papi_Chulo
    3 years ago
    Per what I know of the Phoenix area from TUSCL, the clubs that @nicespice referred to seem far from the most popular/best clubs in the area (at least per TUSCL) - one has to wonder if those clubs are less popular b/c of the stupid-decisions management is making or if management is just desperate to try anything b/c there clubs are not doing well?
  • ElDuderino_AZ
    3 years ago
    @papi - of the clubs she posted, ABCO is probably popular late night on the weekends, but that's about it, because it's 18+. The other one she posted, Jaguars, is completely dead during the day but the place gets slammed at night. It's huge and pretty nice inside, and seems to be the only "make it rain" club here; not being an extracurriculars club is seemingly the only reason it isn't popular on this site. In reality, it's one of the busiest clubs in town.
  • joewebber
    3 years ago
    Papi: I also wonder if rap/hiphop culture is not a big influence w.r.t. how many of these girls live and act – at the end of the day hiphop came from the streets and it has glorified and to a certain extent normalized living a certain lifestyle - hiphop having been the dominant art-form over the last 2-decades or so it likely has influenced how many of these young strippers live their lives – "


    you are 100% correct. and it slipped my mind.

    the girls are imitating reality TV like the Kardashians, 15 and pregnant, and various aspects of rap and hip-hop culture.

  • Icee Loco (asshole)
    3 years ago
    Girls aren't just giving the club free advertising. They get a cut of the sections and bottles they sell. And putting up ads on nights they work or events they'll be at potentially gets them customers there.

    For the club itsbabway of avoiding calling the girls employees. Makes them spokesmodels. That's why clubs also have girls gi promote on slow nights. Although some clubs that pay them as employees consider promoting as part of their job.
  • 48-Cowboy
    3 years ago
    You sound like a boomer that wants an all boys club. There are plenty of all boys clubs around called Gay Bars
  • anon0911
    3 years ago
    I probably as a mid 30’s guy skew younger than most on here. On a few recent visits I have gotten phone numbers from the nice ladies. When that happens they also often show up as suggested on social. The rule for me is I follow on IG with the understanding it’s a business interaction for me and a chance to know when they are at the club. What else they do is their choice. I will throw a comment every now and then on thirst trap.
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