Best review comments

I imagine a restaurant critic bringing a notebook to capture notes as he dines, and seeing a dude entering a strip club with a jizz stained notebook. Seeing him taking notes about the particular location of certain parts of the club. Then when someone asks him, he blurts out he’s a strip club reviewer for TUSCL! Lol!

Yeah those comments should be in the 'how to write a proper review' section.

Another common comment I see is 'Prices?'. Like a guy will write that he came in, had drinks, had a couple lap dances with a girl, then took another girl to VIP. And not list the cost of any of those activities. And before someone says just look at the generic club info provided on the club page, realize that inflation is hitting and clubs are rapidly changing costs. A lot of that info is outdated as fuck.

Prices are definitely an important part of a review. If a guy doesn’t give prices, it limits the usefulness of the review.

I am not very concerned with the price of a beer, as it’s generally not a deal breaker. But, dance prices can make a difference in whether I will go to a club.

Great point about prices Cashman and TFP. The other price for VIP that is not often listen is the expected tip for the manager and the waitress. Maybe the example review could have a good better and best example of how to describe the PIP costs.

I reject reviews that talk about soliciting prostitution snd just say they're writing about soliciting prostitution

To emphasize Cashman's point, using terms to describe prices like cheap, average and expensive are subject to geographic location. $100 will get you 3 LDs in a Seattle club (maybe), a LDK session in an Atlanta club or FS in an Akron club.

The line that often pops in reviews that cracks me up...but I never comment on...is: "The beer was cold." You really only need to tell me when the beer isn't cold. I would say 98% of the time the beer is cold.

I thought of two more typical comments:

Did VIP price include the dancer and tips to waitress and manager, or was that extra?

Please break this review into paragraphs instead of one long block of words.

I like the remark "punctuation is your friend learn how to use it" and in conjunction with, "paragraphs are your friend use them wisely"

if the review is not specific enough to distinguish it from any other club, it's no good.

ex: the club was slow last night. there were 10 dancers working. some were pretty. i got some table dances. i bought a drink. after an hour, i left.

or sometimes too specific about one dancer.

ex: i was really eager to see Monica. she always treats me right. she certainly knows her way around a stage. she sat at my table for 45 minutes before she even asked if i wanted a dance. i bought her a drink. Monica knows some of the other dancers here. Monica drives 30 minutes to get to work.

I've seen the comment "Prices?" on reviews where the prices are actually listed in the review. This is the fault of the commenter for not closely reading the review before putting a comment on it.

I reserve putting thoughtful comments into reviews that I think the author made a decent attempt at. Otherwise, its just sarcastic BS or generic checkbox.

I mostly comment if I see a reviewer has actually put some effort in, and I feel they might have missed the mark, but I'll usually approve the review and I try to keep my comment's constructive.

I’ve gotten a kick out of blah’s comments of reviews in the past

Of course, DO 👏 NOT 👏 CONNECT 👏 GIRLS 👏 BY 👏 NAME 👏 TO 👏 EXTRAS!!!

MANDATORY: Dancer lineup and description. Details on any girls you had 1:1 time with, including prices, location, and mileage.

NICE TO HAVE: Club physical description. Drink prices. Descriptions of the surrounding area.

Trolladon basically wants reviews of hookers not clubs

DumbasseyLoco obviously skipped the day they taught reading in school.

^ Go away, Cacaplop

Trolladon is a weirdo using a stripper ho forum as his right wing political soap box. Keeps contradicting himself and argues for yhe sake of trolling

Idiots on this forum, like magnets, stick together.

In this case we have Cacaplop (who trolls several strip club boards) and DumbasseyLoco (the homie-talking "pimp" who paid a girl $5,000 to tell him she doesn't love him) sucking each other's dicks.

You two are part of what keeps this place endlessly entertaining. Don't ever change!

She loves me and wouldn't even take that to say she doesn't

And yeah you dumbass trolls stick together

"She loves me"

Like all addicts love their dealers.

You're not just a dumbass, you're a worse degenerate than the worst monger on this board.

^ I see your second username here, Cacaplop. You must be really bored today.

^ Whatever. Go away, Cacaplop.

You're calling her a junkie and criticizing out love. How many junkies turn down 5k just to say they don't love someone. Apparently she doesn't see me as you do lulz

You sick fucks keep creating fantasies about me in your heads. Autistic obsessive weirdos

Because her Puerto-Greekan stud muffin filled her needs (and filled other things).

I don't need to create "fantasies" about you. Only to remind you what you said.

You're a depraved prick.

Again you ignore the facts and twist things around to suit your fantasies and delusions.

One of my pet peeves regarding reviews is when a reviewer uses names of bartenders and dancers. That is useless to most readers. I don’t care if Lola the bartender is back. We all know dancer names change frequently, so it’s not useful to use a name without providing a physical description.

Dancer names are extraordinarily helpful in reviews. While one should never connect a name with an illegal act, outing ROBs by name is an act of PL valor, and letting regulars know who is good and who should be avoided is, frankly, the whole fucking point of most reviews. 🙄

I go to clubs 2-3 times a week, pretty much every week. Not once have I gone to a club where a dancer told me she changed her name, so that's kind of a stupid take as well.

"While one should never connect a name with an illegal act, outing ROBs by name is an act of PL valor, and letting regulars know who is good and who should be avoided is, frankly, the whole fucking point of most reviews."

Amen. I don't know why some reviews say "this girl ripped me off but I don't want to out her." ROBs must be outed!

You think girls who aren't hookers should be shamed in reviews. Nice.

Post your real name here so we can review your work place

^ My real name, in the last strip club logbook I signed in, is "Haywood Jablowme."

DumbasseyLoco, do you understand the difference between not being an extras girl and being an ROB? Does it ever hurt to be such a dumbass?

Most on this forum consider non hookers robs.

You're telling people to out dancers who don't fuck and don't let them grope them. Weirdo

And your ignorance comes through again.

Most charges of being an ROB are women who cut dances short, over count songs, or insist you agreed on a higher price than you really did. Nothing to do with extras or not.

Non extras girls who are open and honest about that don't get the label.

Chili Palmer we have differing opinions regarding the point of writing a club review.

Naming a ROB in a review is a good thing. But, stripper names can change frequently. A name without any description isn’t very helpful. A description of the ROB, with a name, is much more useful.

I’ve not yet been to a strip club and seen dancers wearing name tags. That might provide some challenges in topless or nude clubs.

Knowing what a club offers, regarding mileage, dance pricing, and extras, is generally all the back room information I am looking for. I don’t need to know the names of the dancers who are the best service providers.

When I say what a club provides regarding extras, I’m only interested to know if the club allows extras. I don’t want to hear what the customer received (or who provided it).

I reject reviews that discuss prostitution

We reject you ya fuckin fag.

Just look up the reviews from semi regular and you will see a ton of useless blather with nothing of value. Textbook examples on how to not write a review.