Texting Tips

It's not terribly uncommon to hear these types of stories, I haven't gotten one but I've had a couple of buddies who have gotten a cashtag or gift request from a dancer. Working theory: if you're not otherwise a solid regular of hers -- so she's got a business reason to invest some time in you -- the texting may be her working you for an eventual tip, gift request, emergency cash request, etc. Just a guess, but I tend to only text with my ATFs and CFs, and they certainly have a clear business motivation to get me all turned on and back in the club, especially since I go to the club to spend all my $ on just one girl

Nope. But I don't use Snapchat and my communications with dancer are usually pretty simple. Not anything that would be worth tipping, even if it was an option. I do sometimes have casual exchanges with dancers about non sexy time stuff [1], but even those dancers know that I won't give them money unless it's in person and for something that's going to happen in person.

I also don't like leaving digital breadcrumbs in the form of payments. But that's just me.

Honestly, it's not like something like this surprises me. If you want to stop seeing her anyway, that fine. But their job is to get us to give them money. Our job is to say 'no' when we don't want to. Nobody should get offended or even that annoyed.

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[1] A dancer texted me out of the blue a couple of weeks ago to recommend the Netflix crime series "The Sinner" (stars Bill Pullman). She just thought I'd like it. There's three seasons; the first two are pretty good, while the third is 'meh' but not bad.

I've got a small handful of girls I text but it's not frequent. With one, we texted once a week during the pandemic. Others can to weeks without texting and, occasionally, they will initiate the texting just asking how I'm doing. When I initiate, it's basically the same thing. How are you type of thing.

Yeah I’m out with that one

Youre her customer....not the clubs. In her eyes

Idk. I'll never criticize another grown man for how he spends his own time, but I have 0 interest in casually texting with a stripper - my limited free time is just too valuable to me. But even if I wanted to I probably wouldn't, first because there is never any upside in appearing needy and, second, because you have to expect her to eventually want something more for it if you eat up enough of her off-the-clock time.

^ But you'd "criticize another grown man for how he spends his own time"

Check buddy we gotcha ✔✔✔✔✔

twenty, I wouldn't call that "criticism" as much as food for thought. His priorities in dealing with dancers might not be the same as mine. If he enjoys the back and forth and doesn't mind the potential downsides then all power to him. 👍

^ If you wouldn’t call that criticism sounds like you and I speak different languages I mean really why bother

^ I can't control how a cranky old man read something. 😉

But if he takes it the same way then so be it. The reason I bothered is clearly evident in my post. Why you're bothering to whine about it is the more relevant question.

I never used Snapchat in that way with dancers but have experience with similar situations using text. Sounds like she is testing the waters to see how much you would be willing to send as it seems she didn't state a price from your post. Depends on what you want out of this. But if you are looking to pay for more then some snaps she might be open to that. But if she has GPS then she probably will try to milk you and never deliver the goods. Which a lot of them are very good at doing. But it sounds like you already made up your mind about moving on from her.

Please RickiBoi spare us your phony aphorisms, you need to stop aside and look in your mirror, your favorite comments always start with how you won’t criticize how another person has fun then you proceed to tell them what you’d expect to do and that how you wouldn’t waste your time and/or money, oh yea , it’s all about you, you, you, same as icee and SJGs you’re fuckn retarded and boring as fuck.

^ If he feels unfairly criticized then he's certainly free to object. Are we about done with the whining now? 😉

There’s a difference between snapchatting and texting. If I get a dancer’s number, I’m getting it for two reasons - 1. to setup more ITC - 2. if the ITC works well then I will begin working the OTC side.

I’m not interested in learning how her cat might be feeling. It’s just business. I’m not interested in a stripper friendship.

Based on your description - it’s time to cut her off. Don’t send her a tip. If she fucks you OTC like you’ve never been fucked before - then it might be tough decision. If this is just a dancer gives a decent grind on your johnson - she’s nothing special - then she’s done.

Funny RickiBoi says everyone is whining. yet he’s a whiny little twat, how about owning your statements, and being a grownup and apologize to samiel for being a hypocritical twat and selfish prick that can’t see the world past his own navel gazing.

Asking for a tip for a casual Snapchat conversation seems a bit shortsighted and greedy, but it's far from a capital offense. I've had dancers ask me for money for [X], I've said 'no', and then we went on to have a lot of fun. Some of them pouted over it and some just shrugged it off.

But they all (well, most...) figured out from that point forward that they were never going to get money out of me using those tactics. It's fine. We set boundaries for them, and they set boundaries for us. So, again, if you were already looking to ease off with this dancer, then fine. But I wouldn't cut things off with a dancer I have fun with over something like this.

There are hundreds of threads on here about dancers trying to finagle money out out of customers. It's amazing that guys are still surprised or annoyed when it happens. If you want to sharply reduce this type of behavior from women in your life, then open up a Match/eHarmony profile and date women who are in your league and age appropriate. Personally, that's not for me. So, I accept that dancers will make these asks every so often, and I'll have to tell them 'no'.

I'll also point out that it's possible to have casual messaging conversations with a dancer without it eating up a bunch of your time. A lot of the messaging I'll do with a dancer is arranging times and places to meet, but being able to have a good, friendly relationship with a dancer can be beneficial sometimes. I mean, it's not horrible for two people to treat each other like humans even if the relationship is more business-like.

The dancer who suggested the TV show to me via messaging? I thought that was very nice, and I did enjoy the show. But, she also gave us something to talk about the next time we get together before we "get down to business", so to speak. She's no dummy.

My policy with texting is purely business related. I'm not looking for a pen pal and don't want them texting me all day/night about nonsense or BF troubles. I only text to see if they're working or if they're in town. Being respectful of their time and also straight to the point has led to dancers being very responsive to my messages.

However, doesn't mean I won't text them a Happy Birthday or something personal when it's warranted. But I've never had one ask me to tip them for a conversation because I'm not having conversations. And if they stop replying, then their loss as I won't be spending money on them at the club.

You guys who dismiss snapchat are missing out ... or may be missing out. If you're the type who only texts strippers for business/appointments, or who doesn't like texting strippers at all, I get it, you'd hate snapchat even more than texting. But if you like texting strippers -- and I always get a kick out of texting my CFs and ATFs -- then snapchat can be pretty great. Her routine on snapchat is going to be to send pics, and snapchat makes doing that super easy and convenient. Once a stripper suggests we switch to snapchat, I know I'm going to be getting sexy pics and vids of her, and possibly a lot of them, randomly. I enjoy communicating with my fave stripper, I love seeing sexy pics of her, I love when she goes out to pick up new stripper or club outfits and snaps me from the try-on room. Love.

TL;DR: if you don't like texting strippers and don't care about sexy pics/vids, but if you do enjoy those things, you'll get way more pics and videos of her on snapchat.

^^^ Yep. This falls cleanly under "Don't tell people they're having fun wrong."

I tried Snapchat. It's just not for me. If it works for other guys, great, but it's not for me.

I don't even want paying clients to have my number, let alone a dancer.

In keeping with the OP's cashapp request: if it's just some random stripper giving you her snapchat, 99% of the time she's going to try to bait-and-switch you into buying her premium snapchat for her nudies. If you have a CF, you're more likely to get the treatment I just described

===> "You guys who dismiss snapchat are missing out ... or may be missing out... ...But if you like texting strippers -- and I always get a kick out of texting my CFs and ATFs -- then snapchat can be pretty great..."

As I said before, to each his own. Not my cup of tea, but that's why they make so many flavors I guess. But the OP is here complaining that she asked to be paid after going back and forth with him for 2 days, like it was a thoroughly unreasonable request. No doubt his perceived neediness had something to do with why she felt comfortable sending the request the way she did.

So hey, enjoy what you enjoy, but that level of ongoing interactions comes has its drawbacks too.

^ More criticisms from RikiBoi , TUSCL's very own bullshit guru, and all around know it all "I'd never tell a grown man how to have fun or spend his own money"

Rick, I addressed that in my earlier response. It's just a theory based on some observations of others, but if a stripper you barely know is texting or snapchatting you, I'd bet that's when you're more likely to get her cashtag, a tip request, an emergency situation she wants you to pay for, or an invitation to join her premium snapchat. She's got very little business incentive to spend a bunch of time texting some random customer otherwise. If you're her decent-paying regular, you're a well qualified lead, and she's got plenty of incentive to keep you horny and get you back in the club spending on her, rather than risking that for a $20 "I'm spending all this time texting you" request. My personal experience has been that there's absolutely no downside to snapping or texting my CF, it's all just fun.

It's never pleasant to learn that someone regards you only as an ATM. "I thought she really liked me." I don't mind being an ATM, but I want a little love when I dispense the money.

How can you want to be customers but be so cheap?

I see, so the theory holds that samiel's CF should have been more ok with going back wand forth with him for two days for free simply because he's a regular? Ok then - agree to disagree I guess.

Look, no girl ever knows if a guy is ever going to return to the club again or spend another nickel on her - it is completely discretionary spending. This chick indulged him for two days before asking for money. I can't hold that against her.

I like for there to be a strong boundary between my PL life and my real one. For example, my name’s not actually Drew Carey, lol. The very last thing I want is a stripper knowing my email, phone number, etc. and then through accident or sleuthing, for that world to suddenly bleed through into Mrs Carey’s orbit. I walk into the club, pay in cash, and walk out, at which point I have walked off the grid as far as CF’s or anyone else in stripperworld are concerned. Then again, I like variety and there’s plenty of extras in seattle, so I don’t really maintain a CF for very long if at all, and maintaining contact out of the club isn’t a priority for me.

I'm trying to remember when a stripper has ever offered up her cashapp when I didn't ask first, and I can't remember a single instance. Given how recent an innovation SnapChat is (relatively speaking), I think I would.

Mind you, I've asked for them relatively infrequently, and only when I thought I could trust the person to at least give me the time of day after that. And to not abuse my generosity. So far, it's been a net positive in terms of payback, whether an actual payback, or a "payback".

If someone I barely knew just gave to to me and said "pay up for talking to me", I'd likely laugh at them.

"The very last thing I want is a stripper knowing my email, phone number, etc."

Just to zero in on this part -- I don't even have a Mrs Subrawoman anymore, and I'm not giving a stripper my email or phone number. Strippers don't email so that isn't even in the equation, although if I ran into a bizarro world stripper who liked email, I'd get a fake gmail. For phone number, we all -- including the strippers -- use google voice, it's free, and can't be back-traced to our real name and address.

Everything else you said -- worry about it bleeding into Mrs Carey's orbit, not liking to maintain a CF, etc. all reasonable. Just pointing out none of us are giving a stripper our real, traceable numbers. Even my snapchat is a snapchat just for strippers.

@subraman those are reasonable precautions, some of which I myself use for other applications. The accident I imagine is the google voice text popping up on my phone while I’m in the next room, and then hearing a “hey, who is ‘Stormy’?” Lol. Obviously no precaution is foolproof, and if the nsa is after you, you’re going to get found. Luckily for me fat guys with CHJ fetishes aren’t top of their list!

I'm not a snapchatter. I prefer Instagram. That way you can see their pics. I don't put many personal things on my insta feed so no problem there.