OT: The new face of slavery

24 comments

• Papi_Chulo

  •

  4 years ago

  ^ I wonder what reparations the monkeys are gonna ask for. Sources say Benjamin Crump is already representing many of the victims
• TheeOSU

  •

  4 years ago

  Monkey lives matter!
• rickthevulture

  •

  4 years ago

  Some of you damn dirty apes are beyond the pale (or, as skifredo would put it, “beyond the pail”) Free the frickin’ monkees! I thought two of ‘em were dead anyway. Squawk!
• rickthelion

  •

  4 years ago

  Not Monkees lil’ bud, monkeys. As in the mischievous lil’ primates. But still fucked up on the part of the hairless apes. ROAR!!!
• TheeOSU

  •

  4 years ago

  > [view link]
• Papi_Chulo

  •

  4 years ago

  Some news outlets are reporting gangs of monkeys looting a local-Walmart and leaving with big-screen TVs - wow
• rickthevulture

  •

  4 years ago

  Aah... I though Papi Ape had misspelled that charming comedy-rock group. Good call. It would be fucked up to enslave Zombie Davy Jones! Squawk!!! Still fucked up to enslave the monkeys. You need to go all wildebeest on the slave master’s asses. roar... Squawk!
• Papi_Chulo

  •

  4 years ago

  You know there are gonna be some masters that are gonna get jungle-fever and impregnate some of the female monkeys and have some mixed-race kids - unbelievable
• Eve

  •

  4 years ago

  Nothing personal, just monkey business.
• Papi_Chulo

  •

  4 years ago

  They should do the right thing and give them 40-acres-and-a-mule - just sayin'
• loganshard

  •

  4 years ago

  Yea, I thought it was the Babylon Bee when I read it
• rattdog

  •

  4 years ago

  well then i will be boycotting Costco Pulling Products Allegedly Gathered By Forced Monkey Labor - where else will get those ripe coconuts? only those monkeys can get to those ripe coconuts!!!
• ATACdawg

  •

  4 years ago

  In a related development, Harris Teeter grocery stores have immediately ceased selling tern eggs gathered by hippopotamuses climbing cliff walls.... HT refused to pay the increased demands of the hippos. The price of term eggs was already through the roof as the number of eggs being successfully returned was miniscule.😏
• Eve

  •

  4 years ago

  I don't know if it's the article or the responses in this thread that are more off the chain. (no pun intended)
• Papi_Chulo

  •

  4 years ago

  I just hope there isn't another civil-war over this ("Four score and seven monkeys ago our fathers brought forth upon this continent ...)
• mike710

  •

  4 years ago

  I don't think Costco got the memo. This was one of the hidden relief programs called "Primate Advancement Program" that Nancy Pelosi snuck into the last Corona Virus relief program. She was in a battle with Trump and had to pick this program over funding for the MET. The goal of this program was to lift these poor primates from the jungle and give them gainful employment. It makes them feel better about their life when they earn the bananas they eat rather than take them as a handout.
• Papi_Chulo

  •

  4 years ago

  What @Mike710 said makes sense - these monkeys needed to learn some skills so they could obtain gainful employment instead of hanging around on trees all day - get a job you lazy fuck
• TheeOSU

  •

  4 years ago

  [view link] Here we come Walkin' down the street We get the funniest looks from Everyone we meet Hey, hey, we're the Monkees And people say we monkey around But we're too busy singing To put anybody down We go wherever we want to Do what we like to do We don't have time to get restless There's always something new Hey, hey, we're the Monkees And people say we monkey around But we're too busy singing To put anybody down We're just tryin' to be friendly Come and watch us sing and play We're the young generation And we've got something to say, oh Any time Or anywhere Just look over your shoulder Guess who'll be standing there? Hey, hey, we're the Monkees And people say we monkey around But we're too busy singing To put anybody down Whaaa, one time! Hey, hey, we're the Monkees And people say we monkey around But we're too busy singing To put anybody down We're just tryin' to be friendly Come and watch us sing and play We're the young generation And we've got something to say Hey, hey, we're the Monkees Hey, hey, we're the Monkees
• rickthelion

  •

  4 years ago

  No no OSU-ape. I’ve already clarified this. This is about monkeys, not monkees On the other hand, raising Davy Jones from the grave to make him my undead minion would be good for a laugh. Maybe I should consider it...
• twentyfive

  •

  4 years ago

  Are free bananas a thing in this election?
• gammanu95

  •

  4 years ago

  Better stay clear of the monkey picket lines. Feces will be thrown.
• Cashman1234

  •

  4 years ago

  Can we get a monkey focus group together? This article has no mention of monkey feelings. Are they sure monkeys don’t want employment? It seems a bit one sided to make assumptions without hearing both sides.
• twentyfive

  •

  4 years ago

  Monkeys should get IC status
• Studme53

  •

  4 years ago

  I only buy monkey labor-free coconut products thank you. 8 year old Thai kids making 100 bhat a day gather them instead