Hallelujah! I Have a Nosebleed!

avatar for reverendhornibastard
reverendhornibastard
Depraved Deacon of Degeneracy
2020 has been a very odd year! Among the many “firsts” in my life that I’ve experienced in 2020, I can now add my peculiar sense of elation and relief over having a nosebleed.

The fall season is upon us and, for me at least, it means my annual second bout of hay fever (only slightly less annoying than my springtime hay fever).

Sure enough, I’ve been hacking and coughing a lot, wheezing and occasionally feeling puny. But with all the Covid19 hysteria, it was difficult not to consider the possibility of a much more serious, alternative diagnosis.

“Should I go have myself tested for Coronavirus?” I asked myself several times last week, fretting more about how my family would fare without me than the possibility of my own demise.

Then last night in the shower I began spitting blood.

I was overjoyed!

My sinuses were fucked up (just like they always get during my hay fever episodes) and now I was having my traditional hay fever nosebleeds!

Halle-fuckin’-lujah!

14 comments

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avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
4 years ago
If your nose bleeds are frequent, I recommend Arm & Hammer "Simply Saline" nasal mist. I use it once a day.
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
4 years ago
A few weeks ago I had a similar set of symptoms I went to a quick med and was pleasantly surprised to find out that a fifteen minute test was available
I took it and am pleased to say my results showed that I was negative
Getting tested should be easy and available to everyone not just folks with Medicare coverage from my provider.
avatar for Eve
Eve
4 years ago
Does this mean you're not DTP? :c
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
4 years ago
^hell no baby 😛
avatar for nicespice
nicespice
4 years ago
LOL so the reverend is diagnosed as a pervert. 😛

https://aminoapps.com/c/anime/page/blog/…
avatar for JerseyJack
JerseyJack
4 years ago
Rev - my hay fever was off the charts this spring, and then I tried using a neti pot with a saline rinse. Life changer! I started off doing it twice every day for about a week, and have dropped back to once a day 2-3 times a week for routine maintenance. I can't remember the last time my sinuses were this open and clear!
avatar for reverendhornibastard
reverendhornibastard
4 years ago
@JerseyJack,

Thanks for the suggestion. I’ll give it a try.

Sounds gross but it can’t be any worse than what I go through every spring and fall.
avatar for BabyDoc
BabyDoc
4 years ago
@reverendhornibastard

Have you considered relocating to the Tropics? I've heard it makes you twenty years younger and is sure to cure whatever ails you.

In fact I think I was just reading an article on that in the New England Journal of Medicine and you know that if they print it then it is absolutely true, well unless it isn't. lol
avatar for reverendhornibastard
reverendhornibastard
4 years ago
@BabyDoc,

I lived in the tropics for many years (about 16 years). I lived in tropical SE Asia and in tropical parts of Africa.

I also lived pretty far north (in London).

Whenever I was away from my native stomping grounds (Texas), I never had hay fever problems and my sinuses were fine, even though some of the places I lived or traveled to had horrendous air pollution.

I could spend 3 weeks in Beijing breathing some of the filthiest air on the planet and be fine, but after landing in Houston after a nonstop flight from Beijing, my sinuses would start complaining before I had finished the 45-minute drive from Houston’s north airport to my home in Montgomery County.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
4 years ago
b/w 2015 & 2017 I had some severe nosebleeds where I ended up in the hospital at least 3-times if I remember correctly - it wasn't allergy-related and it was a torrent of blood that would not stop (more of a hemorrhage) – at least once or twice I lost consciousness waiting in the emergency room (after someone drove me there or I drove myself) – I had to get my nose plugged for a couple of days – post these nosebleeds my hemoglobin would significantly go down from my avg of 15 I think to the 8’s or 9's if I remember correctly (it's been a while) b/c of all the blood I lost – they never found the source of it – some docs thought it was due to my high BP but that seemed like just a guess – fortunately I haven’t had any more episodes.

My case was more unique that the avg nosebleed most people get that often stops after a few minutes – mine would not stop and would increase to the point I would lose consciousness if I didn’t get help.

Anyway – more of an FYI based on my particular experience w/ nosebleeds and that one needs to be careful if they don’t stop.
avatar for reverendhornibastard
reverendhornibastard
4 years ago
@Papi,

Wow! I’ve heard of nosebleeds like you describe and knew one person (one of my teachers when I was in junior high school) who suffered such nosebleeds.

Mine are nothing at all like that. Mine are minor and very brief (more like just the release of bloody mucous from an infected sinus).

I hope you never have another one like you describe.
avatar for reverendhornibastard
reverendhornibastard
4 years ago
I realize I’m the one who brought up the subject of nosebleeds, but can we now get back to discussing gorgeous, naked young women whose real names we don’t even know performing emergency desploogination procedures for us in the dark corners of seedy bars?
avatar for Icey
Icey
4 years ago
You need more medicine reverend?
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
4 years ago
I apologize for being negative, but as we move from fall to winter I think it will become more difficult to determine whether symptoms are a cold or covid.

If I don’t lose my sense of taste - I’m going to hope it’s a cold. I’m hoping they got the flu vaccine right this year too.
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