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Fuck It!

So I said “fuck it,” took off from work early and headed to a nearby strip club. I’m sitting at the bar per my usual custom and within a couple of minutes a cute spinner sits down next to me. I actually know her. We did a double VIP with her friend (who I know pretty well) a couple of weeks ago, but she was really drunk and didn’t remember me. So we chat for a while, have a couple of drinks, and I mention what we did a couple of weeks ago. She exclaims “That was you!? That was so fun!” Yeah, it was.

So we talk about doing another double VIP. I’m interested but undecided. She starts texting on her phone. I didn’t realize it at first, but what she was doing was texting other girls in the club who might be candidates for another double VIP. Girls start coming by one after another, but nothing piques my interest. Eventually, the same girl from a couple of weeks ago comes by. The two of them were a lot of fun, so again I say, “fuck it.” Off to VIP we go, and another really fun time was had.

I go back out to the bar, and she sticks with me. We have a couple more drinks and I’m starting to get pretty buzzed by now. She wants me to do another VIP session with her. I make her a counteroffer: how about we take off, go to another strip club, have some fun, and I’ll get a hotel room and we’ll finish up with a VIP session there? She was game, but she wanted to bring a friend. I would have to pay her friend, too, but things were slow in the club, so she made a very reasonable offer. I think, “fuck it, why not?”

Since I’ve had a few drinks, the plan is I’ll book the room, I’ll get my car, we’ll drop the car off at the hotel just a couple of miles away, and then Uber to the next club. I get my car. Her friend (not the one from two weeks ago) comes out first. I know her, but not very well. I’ve gotten a couple of dances from her before, but nothing more than that. She gets in the car.

I get a text. The spinner wants to bring another girl. Again, she makes a very reasonable offer. “Fuck it, why not?” The two of them come out and get in my car. I now have three strippers and all of their bags in my car. We head to the hotel.

On the ride, the spinner says “I know you don’t smoke, but is it OK if I smoke a cigarette with the window open?” Against my better judgment (I've obviously lost all sense of judgment by now), I say OK. All three of them immediately light up.

We’re at the hotel in five minutes. I check in, we go the bar, get a round of drinks and call the Uber. The last girl changes her mind and calls her own Uber. I take her to the car so she can grab her bags. She has three of four big bags. WTF? Did she just work one shift (a half shift really) or just come back from a European vacation? Anyway, she grabs her bags and takes off. We’re back down to two girls.

We’re at the next club in about 15 minutes. The girls want to do a VIP. They also want cocaine. I know one of the dancers at the club. I know she would do a good VIP, and I know she can also probably hook them up with some powder, but she is busy with a customer. When she sees me, though, she breaks away and comes over. She tells me she is tied up the rest of her shift but wanted to say hello. I tell her what the girls I came with are looking for. She hooks them up. She also sends over a friend who she says will show us a good time in VIP.

We go the back. The club dancer is not nearly as fun in VIP as I was expecting, although she is beautiful, but the girls I brought with me make up for it.

Today, my car smells like cigarette smoke, even after a bottle of Febreze. I found red curly hair in my car. I also found a pair of stripper shoes in the back seat. If I had a shoe fetish, that would be like finding gold. But I don’t have a shoe fetish. I also discovered my gym bag was missing.