I dont get it, people literally right a review telling a story, I walked in blah blah blah, nothing but their experience. Saying you went to a strip club, had fun, had a beer, waited for awhile got a HJ isnt a review, it's a story. A review explains details, parking, cover, alcohol/no alcohol, drink requirements, dance costs, air/flood/private area/private room dances. I just font get it, it's not a 10 paragraph essay, just review it. I write a review of a pizza joint, I waited 20 minutes for a table, good service, pizza was worth $20 for a two topping, served alcohol but was family friendly. Stop fucking telling me what you would say to a friend, great job you got a HJ, but I really dont care if it's not the average dance or you dont include a price (no price = you don't to much, to me)
Yeah - too-many reviewers review themselves instead of the club - personally I don't mind personal-anecdotes but that can't be the gist of the review - review the club, not you
I do think stories are nice when details are weaved in there. It helps for understanding the general vibe of the place. 🤷🏼♀️
For example, “I chatted with Buttercup for 20 minutes about how friendship is magic and then she quoted me $XXX for the My Little Pony themed champagne room” could give an indication of the vibe and mo of the place.
But yeah, if a story is something generic and could describe a lot of places, then blah.
Great night at Oz Arrived at Oz around 7 and headed to the bar to take in the surroundings. There were plenty of girls out and about ready to make me at ease. As always the girls there are attractive, friendly, and ready to give some good company.
After an hour or so there I finally decided to get a dance with an amazing blonde with great tattoos. Just my type. Paid my money and headed back to the room for the fun. Whether she was or not, she seemed really into the dance and made it worth my time.
I will definitely be heading back as soon as I can.
probably fine if your a regular. I stopped by while I was in town because I was there a few months back a truly enjoyed it, well this time was way different.
First of all there was only 2 girls in the place I liked, and almost every other girl came up and asked me to "buy them a drink" or "do you want a dance"
The brunette girl I liked spent all her time sitting on her phone, while the blonde one spent all her time trying to get a obviously broke guy to buy a dance.
I would have bought many dances from either one of those ladies if they would have asked, but I guess they don't talk to new people.
The site is flooded with shit reviews like that, then people say you are a nazi for rejecting them. I just dont understand how anyone thinks this review is helpful to anyone.
You make a good point. A review should be readable, and not simply a listing of club facts. Some folks get carried away with telling a story, and they leave out the pertinent details. In certain cases, readable reviews are so light on specifics, I wonder if the reviewer went to the club.
The important details should be prevalent in each review. Prices are important - especially for dances. It’s good to know the prices for private dances and for vip/champagne rooms.
I don’t give a shit about dancer names and their attitudes. Names are overrated - and dancers change their willingness to fuck as soon as the rent is due.
I don't think that experiences and stats are mutually exclusive. I also get irritated with generic crap reviews that don't list important details, but specific experiences add additional color.
" i texted Barbie, but she didn't respond, so i looked for another dancer in the club. I found Gina. Gina danced for me, and I wanted to go to vip with her" maybe if they mentioned that barbie was a brunette white girl with tan lines and fake tits....
Not really sure why we TUSCLers even discuss this. The guidelines are very well defined by our founder. THAT should end the discussion. For those that seem to have no idea what they may be:
1)Content and length are the two most important factors to consider.
2)Be wordy. Fill the review box. One or two sentence reviews aren't helpful to anyone.
3)Give a LOT of details in your review (club layout, atmosphere, dance quality, etc.).
4)Your review should be at least 4 solid paragraphs, with 4-7 sentences each. a)One paragraph should describe the club vibe. Mention cleanliness, thug factor, music level, dj annoyance factor, lighting, etc.
b)Another paragraph should describe the dancers and their vampiness. How many were there? What ethicities did you see? Did they seem happy to see you?
c)A third paragraph should be about value. Don't say drinks, dances, cover charge, etc. were cheap or expensive. Tell us the actual costs!
d)At least one paragraph should summarize with three or four sentences describing why you would or would not return to the club.
Read the below review guidelines: Content and length are the two most important factors to consider. Be wordy. Fill the review box. One or two sentence reviews aren't helpful to anyone. Give a LOT of details in your review (club layout, atmosphere, dance quality, etc.). Your review should be at least 4 solid paragraphs, with 4-7 sentences each. One paragraph should describe the club vibe. Mention cleanliness, thug factor, music level, dj annoyance factor, lighting, etc. Another paragraph should describe the dancers and their vampiness. How many were there? What ethicities did you see? Did they seem happy to see you? A third paragraph should be about value. Don't say drinks, dances, cover charge, etc. were cheap or expensive. Tell us the actual costs! At least one paragraph should summarize with three or four sentences describing why you would or would not return to the club. Be honest. You can go into detail of the private dances. Just be careful with names if it may get your ATF in trouble. Spelling, grammar, and punctuation count. Do not use ALL CAPITAL LETTERS! When composing a review, spell check it. Pro Tip 1: Think about what you would like to tell your good buddy about a strip club he's never been to. Pro Tip 2: Think about the business traveler that is sitting in his hotel room with only time enough to hit one club in this new town. Let him know why or why not he should visit a particular club.
To each their own. When I read a review of Follies the last thing I want to read is the umpteenth million description of how someone parked across the street to avoid valet, how many stages there are inside, or that they got a frisky pat down upon entering. I’d much rather read a story of what the person experienced, even if it doesn’t name names.
Very well, T12, but how about the time you go to a new city, and just don't have the familiarity/reference frame of someone that's been going there every Saturday for the last 3 years. Tuscl is a national, even global website. Review should be written for a newbie to the area, further seasoned by unique personal anecdote by reviewer.
There are also reviews that start off with "since my first perfectly good review was rejected...." or "I am not writing this for the review nazis....." than write basically the same review with more word and still not 1 mention of what the girls look like, just that burnette or blonde with a great ass. I will try to write the details they left out when rejecting (type of dance, dance area, parking, door fee, alcohol, in bad area, blah blah blah). They dont need to be long, but give a few details about the club if your story includes "man there were alot of hot chicks atleast 15 on a Tuesday, real mix of white, Latina and AA" is usually enough.
^ Those reviews that start of that way are just looking to pick a fight, it takes 5 votes with a minimum of 3 up votes, to get a review published, I think that the system is working fairly well, not saying it's perfect but IMHO it's much better than it was.
There are great writers and there a lousy writers. And there a noob reviewers and veteran reviewers.
I wonder if any of us will think a review we didn't write is perfect?
What I care about from any review, by priority:
1. Is this primarily a club for extras/lap factory/hang with friends/bikers, or any combination of these.
2. Current standard dance prices for laps & VIP's and do dancers try to upsell on non-extra's dances.
3. Average tip expected for extra's if/when available.
4. Number, average looks, and ethnic mix of dancers on shift.
5. Typical number of PL's at the club on day and/or night shift, and are they generally hood rats, blue collar workers, business types, or BSD (big swinging dicks) with more cash than brains.
6. Drink hustle, entrance routine (parking, pat downs, license scans, entry fee, etc.), bathrooms status (clean or Gawd! Kill it before it kills us!).
If I can get info on at least 3 of the top 4 I'll approve and appreciate the review.
Don't care if the reviewer wants to tell a (hopefully interesting) story, or just wants to list data, or lands somewhere in between. They should use whatever format works best for them to provide useful information.
One of the reasons I have hardly posted new reviews in the last couple of years is because, besides not doing anywhere even close as much SC-ing as before, that little which I do is focused on places I've been to before, so I get the feeling it would be just repetitive, both of my own previous reviews and other people's, unless there has been a major change or something really struck me as worth pointing out. Otherwise nowadays I am likelier to go to the commentary section to say something like "you're right, it's changing for the worse" or "really, the fair price should be $XYZ". (BTW, hunker down, Papi and other FloriTUSCLers...)
I prefer to read reviews where the reviewer tells me a detailed story of the time spent at the club. Were extras offered? Was the staff friendly or overbearing? How much above baseline rates were said extras. Those reviews are what helps me decide if I want to visit a club or not.
Now having said that I dont mind reading about info on dance prices, bathroom location, how much a bottle of your generic Ol' Swill Draft Light is during happy hour, or how the mini taco buffet was out of hot sauce at 1am. The longer and coherently detailed the more helpful imo.
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For example, “I chatted with Buttercup for 20 minutes about how friendship is magic and then she quoted me $XXX for the My Little Pony themed champagne room” could give an indication of the vibe and mo of the place.
But yeah, if a story is something generic and could describe a lot of places, then blah.
You state, "Obviously a lot of reviewers are not bothering to read the guidelines." and some get pissed when you call them on it!
Arrived at Oz around 7 and headed to the bar to take in the surroundings. There were plenty of girls out and about ready to make me at ease. As always the girls there are attractive, friendly, and ready to give some good company.
After an hour or so there I finally decided to get a dance with an amazing blonde with great tattoos. Just my type. Paid my money and headed back to the room for the fun. Whether she was or not, she seemed really into the dance and made it worth my time.
I will definitely be heading back as soon as I can.
I stopped by while I was in town because I was there a few months back a truly enjoyed it, well this time was way different.
First of all there was only 2 girls in the place I liked, and almost every other girl came up and asked me to "buy them a drink" or "do you want a dance"
The brunette girl I liked spent all her time sitting on her phone, while the blonde one spent all her time trying to get a obviously broke guy to buy a dance.
I would have bought many dances from either one of those ladies if they would have asked, but I guess they don't talk to new people.
The important details should be prevalent in each review. Prices are important - especially for dances. It’s good to know the prices for private dances and for vip/champagne rooms.
I don’t give a shit about dancer names and their attitudes. Names are overrated - and dancers change their willingness to fuck as soon as the rent is due.
maybe if they mentioned that barbie was a brunette white girl with tan lines and fake tits....
If you’re concerned about pricing then you’re too broke to be going to strip clubs.
1)Content and length are the two most important factors to consider.
2)Be wordy. Fill the review box. One or two sentence reviews aren't helpful to anyone.
3)Give a LOT of details in your review (club layout, atmosphere, dance quality, etc.).
4)Your review should be at least 4 solid paragraphs, with 4-7 sentences each.
a)One paragraph should describe the club vibe. Mention cleanliness, thug factor, music level, dj annoyance factor, lighting, etc.
b)Another paragraph should describe the dancers and their vampiness. How many were there? What ethicities did you see? Did they seem happy to see you?
c)A third paragraph should be about value. Don't say drinks, dances, cover charge, etc. were cheap or expensive. Tell us the actual costs!
d)At least one paragraph should summarize with three or four sentences describing why you would or would not return to the club.
Read the below review guidelines:
Content and length are the two most important factors to consider.
Be wordy. Fill the review box. One or two sentence reviews aren't helpful to anyone.
Give a LOT of details in your review (club layout, atmosphere, dance quality, etc.).
Your review should be at least 4 solid paragraphs, with 4-7 sentences each.
One paragraph should describe the club vibe. Mention cleanliness, thug factor, music level, dj annoyance factor, lighting, etc.
Another paragraph should describe the dancers and their vampiness. How many were there? What ethicities did you see? Did they seem happy to see you?
A third paragraph should be about value. Don't say drinks, dances, cover charge, etc. were cheap or expensive. Tell us the actual costs!
At least one paragraph should summarize with three or four sentences describing why you would or would not return to the club.
Be honest. You can go into detail of the private dances. Just be careful with names if it may get your ATF in trouble.
Spelling, grammar, and punctuation count. Do not use ALL CAPITAL LETTERS! When composing a review, spell check it.
Pro Tip 1: Think about what you would like to tell your good buddy about a strip club he's never been to.
Pro Tip 2: Think about the business traveler that is sitting in his hotel room with only time enough to hit one club in this new town. Let him know why or why not he should visit a particular club.
I wonder if any of us will think a review we didn't write is perfect?
What I care about from any review, by priority:
1. Is this primarily a club for extras/lap factory/hang with friends/bikers, or any combination of these.
2. Current standard dance prices for laps & VIP's and do dancers try to upsell on non-extra's dances.
3. Average tip expected for extra's if/when available.
4. Number, average looks, and ethnic mix of dancers on shift.
5. Typical number of PL's at the club on day and/or night shift, and are they generally hood rats, blue collar workers, business types, or BSD (big swinging dicks) with more cash than brains.
6. Drink hustle, entrance routine (parking, pat downs, license scans, entry fee, etc.), bathrooms status (clean or Gawd! Kill it before it kills us!).
If I can get info on at least 3 of the top 4 I'll approve and appreciate the review.
Don't care if the reviewer wants to tell a (hopefully interesting) story, or just wants to list data, or lands somewhere in between. They should use whatever format works best for them to provide useful information.
Now having said that I dont mind reading about info on dance prices, bathroom location, how much a bottle of your generic Ol' Swill Draft Light is during happy hour, or how the mini taco buffet was out of hot sauce at 1am. The longer and coherently detailed the more helpful imo.