This is a question for the ladies here on site and for folks of color

twentyfive
Living well and enjoying my retirement
How do y’all feel about certain members here addressing women as bitches and hos doesn’t it seem degrading to you and for you AA guys does it annoy the fuck out of you when you hear the “N” word in various forms coming from non AA folks, maybe I’m rong but I don’t feel comfortable about these banalities being thrown around and then defended as a term of endearment when it’s just plain disrespectful, it’s not politically incorrect it’s just ignorance.

34 comments

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reverendhornibastard
5 years ago
I am not among those to whom you posed your question (but I am a person of color, being mostly of Spanish/Portuguese and Native American descent).

If ANYONE uses a racially charged word, then the use of that word should be open to everyone. It makes no sense to me for African Americans to be free to use words like “coon” or “nigger” to spice up their vocabulary while denying the same privilege to others.

I extend that logic to any racially charged word ... spic, beanerd, mick, nip, wop, redneck, kraut, hymie, limey, pollock, spearchucker, gook, cracker, etcetera.

The offense of these racially charged words is not derived simply from their usage but from the context of their usage. Any of these words can be terribly offensive when employed to convey bigotry and hatred. But these words can also be used without offense in other contexts.

I’m not among those people who have built an entire lifestyle around being constantly offended at every turn.

I use any of these terms in a non-offensive manner whenever I want. No one who knows me thinks I’m a racist.

If someone is offended, it’s their problem not mine.

https://www.tuscl.net/photo.php?id=1820
twentyfive
5 years ago
I am not offended by words but I am sensitive to others feelings, I think most people that use words of that nature are intending to offend, and demean folks, if someone is an intelligent person they have no need to make folks into the other and dehumanize which is the net effect those words have. When you can’t describe something or someone without resorting to slurs, or slang you show your true self to be something other than intelligent.
AtAboy
5 years ago
I don’t know if you’re referring to the de-nigrate post. I also commented utilizing that word. I’m white for those they don’t know.
It wasn’t meant to offend anyone. It was simply meant to concur with reverend.
AA women are in my opinion very attractive for a multitude of reasons.

I didn’t think the play in the word was distasteful.
I’m generally not a very PC person though.

twentyfive
5 years ago
^ I wasn’t I actually agree more with the good Reverend than disagree
My point is the use of those words aren’t politically incorrect and many folks using those words are just fucking rude and looking to get arise out of people rather than being politically incorrect.
I believe in free speech just like everyone else but most here wouldn’t talk that way in the presence of those people whom are described as different from themselves, just imagine a situation where you were out with a woman in a restaurant and the waiter came to take your order and addressed your date by saying “can I take your order bitch”, that’s the point I’m making
daddyfatsack
5 years ago
Thank you founder for the ignore feature on a discussion
Icey
5 years ago
25, you're the person who feels threatened by minority kids and would like to shoot them. You defend Skibum saying undocumented Americans should be shot and see no problem with his constant Islamophobia and xenophobia.

Feigning offense at certain words I use just to make a thread about attacking me just shows what a hypocritical, spineless lil bitch nigga you are.
twentyfive
5 years ago
^ fuck off loser bitch, what a twat you are
prevert
5 years ago
I’m mixed, about 3/4 southern slave (mother) descendent and a quarter Norwegian (father). There’s some Native American on my mother’s side mixed in there as well.

I absolutely detest the N-word. I’m not anybody’s “nigga” and a feel like punching anyone who uses that word, white, black or purple, in the throat.
lopaw
5 years ago
Any homophobic or misogynistic posts will have me immediately hit the ignore button on whoever posted it.

Gone and forgotten.
twentyfive
5 years ago
Loco there is nothing feigned about the outrage that you cause, if you wish to enjoy the company of others you'll need to meet certain standards of conduct. I have made my point you are a despicable miserable person no matter who you might be.
I'm done with you.
san_jose_guy
5 years ago
Twentyfive,

Mamisan will be at your door soon. She can change you, and also:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0021HR94K?tag…

SJG

UNSEEN IN OVER 20 YEARS RARE LISA FISCHER INTERVIEW
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0saiAjVK…
IHearVoices
5 years ago
As rhb said, context matters. I don't use the word (I'm black, in case anyone's wondering 'which' word) and it slightly unnerves me when black people use it. Other than a delirious white guy in a hospital...actually, make that two in different instances...I can't recall the last time I've heard a non-black person say it in person.

Online, different story. I've seen it used by people I know and people I don't know. People I know, I try to let it slide simply because I don't believe them to be racist and they didn't use it in a racist manner. People I don't know tend to not get that benefit of the doubt, as I have no reason to delve into what the context is - mainly because of the anonymity and 'distance' factors. Obviously, racist usage doesn't fly at all.

As alluded to earlier and as rhb said, context really matters. Without them, words are completely abstract. One person could call me that word as a term of endearment while someone else could call me a 'reasonable person' with all sorts of underlying contempt.

Would it be nice if people were more considerate of others' situations and didn't feel like said consideration was some sort of control? Yeah. However, that train left the station a long time ago and the trip was one way. Just have to do the best we can and limit the cases in which we find ourselves in uncomfortable/disrespectful situations both online and offline. For online activities in particular, I've found the ignore feature to be rather useful.
Call.Me.Ishmael
5 years ago
One factor to keep in mind is that the catalyst for this thread, IceyLoco, is not sincere on any level. He's a troll persona who uses those terms so repetitively that it's (A) a caricature and (B) a performance intended to generate exactly this type of churn.

It's an interesting discussion to have about language in urban culture, but IceyLoco is not a valid example of that culture or its slang.
twentyfive
5 years ago
^ as I said before it’s not a normal use of language for well intentioned folks, this is not a literary review or depiction of anything other than how to be rude and offensive and anger folks who have been mostly collegial, disagreeing is normal everyone has their own opinions on many things, but going out of your way to make people feel singled out is not a small potatoes, we have gone through this before and most of us are better than this.
Call.Me.Ishmael
5 years ago
Well, I would never use those terms as forms of "endearment" or otherwise. Then again, I'm white (disregard rumors spread by Papi...).

Twentyfive said "... but going out of your way to make people feel singled out is not a small potatoes..."

But it is de rigueur for trolls.

"... we have gone through this before and most of us are better than this."

Not the trolls.
twentyfive
5 years ago
^ Just because a knucklehead is a knucklehead doesn’t make my point invalid
Estafador
5 years ago
I'm black and the answer to your question is no. I hate when ALL peoples use the n word (except in positive educational context). "N-ga", "n-ger"; to-mae-to-, toh-mah-toe, either way you split it, it's still the same thing. And to those who think every African American uses it and is ok with using it, stop being ignorant and broaden your spectrum of thought.
Call.Me.Ishmael
5 years ago
I don't think your point is invalid. I just think it's important to note that the user in question is not an authentic, real world example for the debate.
Icey
5 years ago
25, you're the person who feels threatened by minority kids and would like to shoot them. You defend Skibum saying undocumented Americans should be shot and see no problem with his constant Islamophobia and xenophobia. Nor have you ever spoken out against TxTittyfag's constant berating of Mexicans using racial slurs and foul language, simply because those attacks are aimed at me.

Feigning offense at certain words I use just to make a thread about attacking me just shows what a hypocritical, spineless lil bitch nigga you are.
Lovelyeast
5 years ago
Why would a white person use the word nigga?

Why would a black person use the word nigga?

Is the word slang or a curse word?

If it’s slang and part of an AA vernacular then why can’t it be used?

And if white people do not use slang or things of such, then why choose the word Nigga?

Can a word change meaning with people, places and things?

I wonder when white People use the word nigga does it sound like cultural appropriation to blacks?
prevert
5 years ago
To answer your last question, Bharlem, when ANYBOY uses it, it makes them sound like uneducated trash just trying to be cool.
shadowcat
5 years ago
I once told a dancer that I couldn't get a dance from her because her name was the same as my daughter's. She said "you can call me anything that you like" I said "how about bitch" and she said "that'll work!".
Clubber
5 years ago
The thing is, we don't ALL react the same to any word. As an example, bastard states "I extend that logic to any racially charged word ... spic, beanerd, mick, nip, wop, redneck, kraut, hymie, limey, pollock, spearchucker, gook, cracker, etcetera." I would fall into the redneck group. Does it offend me? Not at all. Closest heritage of mine not in the US is German. Does kraut offend me? Not at all.

The thing is, someone has to want to be offended in order to be offended. Simple as that!
Icey
5 years ago
First off, nigga isn't nigger.

Second off, its not that a person hearing a racial slur chooses to be offended. Its the fact that the person saying it chooses to be offensive and says it with that intent. Being offended isn't wrong, not putting said offender in their place, is.
Lovelyeast
5 years ago
I agree with Icey. I don’t choose to be offended. If I am, I am. However I can choose whether or not to punch you in the face.

So now black people cant/ shouldn’t be offended. I don’t speak for all I speak for me
Icey
5 years ago
White privilege lets them think they can speak for everyone, and that they're entitled to do as they please and if someone doesn't like their racism....well, its the person's fault for being offended by racism, not the white person's fault for being racist. That's how they think.
twentyfive
5 years ago
^My point is I am not offended by the choice of your ignorant words, I am offended that you want to offend me, you are a bigot plain and simple, and IRL wouldn’t act this way that’s the point.
AtAboy
5 years ago
To answer the initial question, despite not being PC, (my sense of humor can be offensive). I am not ok with using derogatory slangs for people regarding race, religion, or sexual preference.


It’s very doable to tell offensive jokes without using offensive worlds. That’s the grey area I like to live in

I am not offended by slangs (cracker) or stereo types (drunk Irish) but I also have not experienced true hate, bigotry or oppression because of my race. So I can understand why someone with a different experience attached to hateful words could feel very offended by them.


twentyfive
5 years ago
Btw loco remember this you don’t have the right to do as you please, you might get away with it for a bit, but eventually you’ll get what’s coming to you, that’s called karma and it’s real.
skibum609
5 years ago
Wah, wah, wah, mean words offend me. I don't like them so I will threaten you with violence if I use them. Wah, wah, wah I am a thin sakinned uselss pussy. Misigynist, islampahobe blah blah blah, fuckl off you think skinned pussies. Whie prvilige = working hard, getting an eduication and saving. The only people who use it as a derogatory term are total losers and failures. Culutral appropriation lol. How fucking inane.
Lovelyeast
5 years ago
^ Dude you need hooked on phonics.
Icey
5 years ago
25, you're not offended by Skibum's Islamophobia and xenophobia. You haven't said a thing about Txtittyfag's posts and threads using racial slurs against me. You're feigning offense, this is a troll thread aimed to be a backhanded attack on me.
twentyfive
5 years ago
^ I don’t care one way or another Skibum isn’t trying to offend me, it’s you he’s going after, txttty I’ve had on ignore for over two years I haven’t seen a thing he posted since I soaked him before you ever came on this website there’s that, proves that you don’t know a fuckn thing about anything
twentyfive
5 years ago
BTW loco does this thread piss you off lol
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