Giving dancers advice?

Rarely been straightforward for fear of hurting their feelings or them getting pissed, many a dancer can also get defensive - but telling a dancer what it is you want, vs telling them they're doing it wrong, it's often the best way to go.

I have done this and they were totally confused at the possibility that THEY are the problem. This is the problem with hot girls and they go through life with everyone kissing their ass.

LOL

Nobody wants advice.

There's a difference b/w telling them they're doing their job wrong, and telling them what you want - the former will often yield defensiveness or confusion, the latter may make them adjust their game to keep your cash flowing

The white knights here will be chiming in soon;)

Lol, my early verdict is keep my advice to myself. It always puzzles me because dancers/women have such great memory. A lot know how much I tip, services I like, when I saw them last, who I danced with when they werent looking. But when it comes to little incorporating little tricks to gain more money they go brain dead. Another past fav also had a wierd tactic. Id come to the club with a budget in mind and sometimes would have an extra 20 in my wallet. She had this crazy knack for eyeing my wallet and seeing if she could get the last $20 out of my wallet by delaying the dance or pleading. I used to see her twice a month and stopped visiting. I randombly visited her after 4 years and she vividly remembered when we last danced and asked why I dont come. I lied and said I moved out of the area. We went back to the dance area and it was like having a bad flashback as nearing the end of the dance she plotted to take the last $20 from my wallet.

I met this girl one night, just a tiny little white girl spinner with A cups and one of most amazing butts i've ever seen, but in her stage set she's just dance with her butt facing the wall and play with her little titties while dancing. You'd walk up to tip and she'd "smack" you in the face with her tiny tits. The 2nd time i saw her on stage I tipped her and suggested she lets the crowd see her beautiful behind more, and even said I bet your stage tips would go up a lot. Of course I was a little drunk and with the music blasting and her probably being drunk or stoned it probably came out like an adult talking to Charlie Brown. But she nodded her head like she agreed with me, and then the most amazing thing happened...she put her tiny titties in my face, stood up and continued to dance with her butt facing in a direction no one could see it, and playing with her A cups until her set was over.

More often than not, I'm not going to give her advice, or explain myself. Occasionally, I find a stripper I think has potential but just hadn't quite nailed the "how to catch and keep a regular" thing, so I'll let her know what I'm looking for.

They should make a stripper app to show girls how much money is at stake when keeping or losing a regular. My ATF is trained to the point if she knows shes not dancing she texts me the day before.

They should make a stripper app to show girls how much money is at stake when keeping or losing a regular. My ATF is trained to the point if she knows shes not dancing she texts me the day before.

NJ: there are girls who legit can't be bothered with regulars, feel like they do better with a more one-off blitzkrieg hustler, don't want to deal with regular expectations & eventual clinginess, etc. I don't think it's always a slam dunk that lots of regulars is the right way to go all the time, especially on otherwise super-busy shifts; but on slow shifts, it's definitely the girls with regulars who usually make the $$$

“One gives the best BJ i've ever had, but her quote for FS is ridiculous. I used to visit her every 2 weeks, but now once a season because I get a better value elsewhere. My other CF gives the best GFE lapdance with HJ, but she her barside manner is terrible.”

I take it your advice amounts to: “lower your price and/or ignore other potential money making customers to given me a bunch of your time paid for in mostly drinks.”

If that is the case, then trust me that it’s not the first time she has heard advice like that before lol.

Girl #1 likely views head as no big deal but sex as more important. It's actually pretty common with women . Remember in clerks where we learn Dante's girlfriend had sex with 3 guys... But had blown 37. So she may quote high for FS to avoid it. I imagine she's doing fine on money giving great head.

@james good point. She actually not doing fine on giving great head lol. She used to dance 3 days a week and now dances 6. Theres a lot more competition in the club and their attendance is at an all time low.

@iceloco before you put engage in white knight mode remember the girls im talking to always ask me why dont I come by more often. I tip very well and when I decrease my visits I usually get "come by soon" texts. Its very easy for dancers to take us customers for granted.

As a customer I take dancers for granted as well. I once had a girl who could make me LDK twice in a 5 song set. Good barside manner, and beautiful. As good as she was I got used to her being at the bar everytime I visited. About 2 years ago she suddenly stopped working at the bar. I doubt she retired and if i had the sense I have now I would have gotten her number and shot her a friendly text from time to time. My luck is she's been dancing at another bar 10 miles away while ive been struggling to find a girl who gives half the service.

Not sure advice to #1 will help. She probably knows she is a bj queen, telling her her next level service is too expensive probably wouldn’t go anywhere. More likely than not, she knows what the other dancers are charging and making as that’s dressing room gossip. As far as #2, there is nothing wrong giving advice through complimenting her and telling her how banging her LDs are and that she should not write off people that have visited before, but then again maybe she has had some stalker issues. I’d ask her why she does talk to newbies instead of regulars because of how great her LDs are. That said, it’s about tact and if the opportunity to present your case without looking like a lecturing asshole. These days I don’t give advice to dancers, I just vote with my dollars.

And +1 muddy and JamesSD, good advice

@papi_chulo your think women who worked in this industry for a while now would have tougher skin but apparently not. I thought it was their job to stroke our ego, not the other way around? What am I paying for otherwise?

I have been very straightforward forward as I've grown. People don't learn through lies, they learn through honest criticism.

The only way to give advice to a woman is to make it your fault. She doesnt charge too much, you cant spend that much without the wife finding out. I would enjoy our lap dances more if we relaxed at the bar with a drink first. Obviously, you need to work on exactly what you will say.

I’m a dancer who would love advice

@Bharlem81 here's the best advice I have ever received from anyone, Buy High, Sell Low ; )

I don't get it. If #1 gives the best BJ ever but FS is too expensive, why not just go when you want a BJ. If she tries to upsell to FS just tell her you'd love too, but that's too steep.

For #2, just tell her you'd come by more often if she'd give you a bit more priority.

What is there to lose?

It depends. Not to #2 as I never give advice on how to hustle. First, because we don't always have all the facts, including her emotional limitations. Second, because they don't want to hear it even if we have a valid point. Net-net there is just no upside in wading in. Maybe #2 just has limitations in how long she can keep it together when dealing with one person for too long. Who knows? It is what it is.

But #1 is simply a girl who wants more than you are willing to spend for one FS encounter. If it was me and she asked me point blank why I don't visit her more, I'd have no problem telling her that. That's not advice so much as an invitation to renegotiate. if she bites then great, but if not then so be it.

If she giving good BJs just be content with BJs .. Her price is so high because she really doesn’t want to do FS. if she does do FS she wants the most money. It’s good for a stripper to specialize and be good at 1 thing. Hjs ,, BJs Or LDKs , or full service. They can focus and perfect that 1 skill and that’s there main money maker. Everybody has there boundaries. It’s best to respect them. I asked this stripper at follies about her competition. She said she has none because she gives the best OTP handjobs in the building. I call her HJ girl. She not the best looking but she’s does give a good HJ. She got her own niche

Dudecreeping, I agree that she quoted high because she didn't want to do it when they last discussed it. But things change and she opened the door for re-discussing this by asking why he didn't visit her more. I don't see any problem with him being straight about the fact that he spends the most time with girls that will do that.

Shit, if I took the first answer as the final answer with every OTC partner I've had, then I'd have missed out on some of my best experiences. The most recent like this was a girl who quoted me $3,000 the first time I asked her. Just two weeks later, she sat with me and shared a sob story about her BF taking off and her circumstances changing. She might as well have sent up a flare letting me know that she was open to revisiting the OTC discussion and I walked through that door gladly.

There are no babes in the woods in this thing. I'm not a fan of applying too much pressure on a reluctant girl, but when things change I see no issue with reassessing her willingness.

@flag good points. I'll try it. Another tactic I have for #1 is to stop tipping her with the remark that im saving up for a future FS session. Would be hard for her to get angry with that.

@dude,good points. although to believe that she specializes in one thing is a bit of a stretch. Dancers dont have the best long term business sense. Its all about how much they can make to pay the next months rent or vacation.

@Icey , Women have been been getting paid to jerk men off for centuries. Its called marriage.

@rick good points. Another point I didnt make is I used to pay the BJ girl about the same amount per visit in lapdances. We developed a good rapport and she offered to blow me in VIP and said it was the same price as getting my high dance count. I guess Im looking to upgrade again for a smaller fee.

NJ, thanks for the additional points. I'd say the same thing though. She opened the door with that question and you might as well tell her why you don't see her as often as you like. It's up to her to determine what your business is worth to her and what she needs to further improve your experience.

The only thing I will add is that it's best if possible to phrase the conversation in terms of what the other person wants not what you want.

For FS girl why dont you just give her what shes asking? if she provides a good experience keep paying and if it sucked low ball her the next time. her BJ rate becomes her FS rate if it sucked. some strippers get clingy after FS.

this way youre not giving her any advice

The only advice I give dancers is, Take all their Taco Bell Money

Just make sure they don't have enough money to go tobTaco Bell after the club

@salty i like to visit clubs regularly so my budget for visits of relatively modest. While once in a while I may wish I had a reason to visit her often I do enjoy the ability to visit a variety of clubs. I would say my desire for her to be more appealing is because her job is getting harder (customer decrease at club, more dancers to compete with, more LE activity to curb extra) If she was a perfect girl Id probably see her half the time I club, but currently its around 10%.

I would advise them to destroy every shitter in the club!

@Salty: we're probably not talking about a difference of 50 or 100 bucks, like we might be if NJ was clubbing in AZ. He clubs in the NY metro area, where the economics are twisted and some girls price access to their pussies at exorbitant amounts. I'm not blaming her for it as she should ask for whatever she thinks she thinks it is worth. There are plenty of guys in that market who will pony up serious scratch to fuck a hottie, especially on a drunk night in a strip club.

If New Jersey wasn't currently experiencing an exodus of high earners to places like FL and TX, NJBalla might not have even rated the upgrade to BJ. My guess is that she'll continue to adjust as new economic realities continue to settle into the NJ club scene, but alternatively she could just say fuck it and hold her ground, or she could retire, or move her game into NYC...or. But I don't blame Mr. Balla for trying.

@rick good points. Her price for BJ could get me FS with many escorts or massage parlors and her FS charge is outragerous. The only reason I still show up once in a while is that she gives a great BJ. I agree about there being an exodus of dancers. I would think the economy has given girls the ability to escort more often than dancing as well. It looks like she is just going to work more days a week to make ends meet.