How to escape the 1st clingy dancer

15 comments

• Muddy

  •

  6 years ago

  This topic comes up a lot here. This shit always happens though. I usually say like "Hey I don't wanna waste your time, but I just got here I'm trying feel out the dancers/club" something like that. That's if I'm new there, if it's one of my clubs "I'm waiting on xxx" They usually tell me they will see me around or whatever and respect my shit. Rarely am I nasty about it though. Some of the other dudes on here are though because they are dickheads haha.
• Subraman

  •

  6 years ago

  Respectful but direct. Or, follow the code: 1. Don't be an asshole, 2. Don't be a little bitch Similar to Muddy's first response, if she's just sat down to talk, pretty quickly I'll tell her, "thank you for coming by to chat, but I'm not planning on doing any dances with you, nice meeting you." If I can get her before that, I do... even before she sits, if she asks if I want company, I say "no thank you"; if she asks if she can sit down, I say "no thank you". -->"Just last week I walked into a club and as I was ordering a beer, a dancer latched onto me, followed me to where I was sitting and struck up a convo" With all due respect, she did that because she correctly surmised you were too spineless to dismiss her, and very often the scared guys will either tip her to go away, or buy a dance from her just to get her to go away. She's a smart stripper who knows when she can manipulate a customer who inappropriately feels dismissing her is "rude" -->"Meanwhile other women took the stage and I wasn't free to walk up and tip them" You were 100% to walk up and tip them. "Thanks for talking to me, I'm going to go tip at the stage and meet some of the other girls". Not trying to roast you -- just trying to drive home the point that all this is in your head. YOu will enjoy your strip club trips 1000% more once you learn to pursue your own agenda rather than get passively manipulated by a stripper. It's not the stripper's fault -- she's correctly profiled you as a customer and is doing what she can to make some cash
• Liwet

  •

  6 years ago

  I make it very clear early on that she won't be getting money from me. If she wants to stay with me, then I get to have an amazing strip club experience for free; bonus if I can get her to sit in my lap while I grope her a bit.
• skibum609

  •

  6 years ago

  When you tell them they need to find someone else and they don't move on you have to reconsider how you look at people when you blow them off.
• georgmicrodong

  •

  6 years ago

  What Subraman said, in spades. Pretty much all of us have been in your shoes at one point or another. You have the advantage of being able to hear others’ experience on the subject. If you’re worried about “fallout” from brushing someone off, you’ll usually meet three types. One is the type that will appreciate you not wasting her time. Next is the type who will try to guilt you into buying something, or use some other hard sell. The last is the one who’ll get upset, or worse, about it, and raise a stink. In all three cases, your firm stance and continued polite “no thank you” responses will work in all but the most extreme cases.
• mal_hodgson

  •

  6 years ago

  I used to get trapped like this (the Minnesota Nice thing I suppose) but don’t put up with it anymore. If I’m really not interested and they ask permission I decline. If they just sit down without asking I’ll say I’m waiting for someone (I usually am if it’s my regular club), or I’ll say I just got here and I want to settle in first. What really amazes me about some girls is how they approach me. At my regular club I sit at a small table with 2 chairs along a short half wall that gives a good view of the stage without lots of other customers around. So many girls will come up and sit In the chair next to me that is at the table behind me. If I want to engage I have to twist around uncomfortably. This is almost a guarantee that I’ll blow them off. What I really can’t understand is why they don’t just ask to sit in my lap! It’s common and accepted at this club so why not go for it and get something started? I’m much more likely to get a dance if she is in my lap letting me get hands on a little or better yet if she is too.
• DeclineToState

  •

  6 years ago

  Ya, the don't be an asshole, don't be a little bitch article is an excellent strip club PL behavior Cliff Notes, and if you haven't seen it TimJo, here it is: [view link]. My personal MO is: 1. If I know upon her approach that I'm not attracted and not gonna get dances, it's a polite no thank you and if she persists it's more polite no thank yous and that does the trick 90%+ of the time. I'm not gonna waste her time and I'm not gonna let her waste mine. 2. If upon her approach I've got some level of interest but not certain I'm into her for getting dances, I let it play out for 5 minutes of chit chat while reaching my own conclusion. This doesn't happen often because I'm typically pretty sure re dances or not upon approach. If my decision is no, it's still a polite and some form of: it was nice to meet you, you're adorable but I'm not gonna get dances and I don't be a time waster for you. Since this happens so infrequently, I can't remember if I've ever tipped out minor $ for the 5 min spent but I'm not opposed to it. 3. I never use "I'm waiting for someone else" as pretext to get her to go away, and say it only if I'm actually waiting for someone else. There's lots of lying going on in SCs but I'm disinclined to be the one doing the lying. Using the I'm waiting for someone else lie could result in the rejected dancer telling other dancers hey that guy's a douchebag liar and I don't want that label because who knows those other dancers could be future CF candidates. The one I struggle with (though it's pretty rare) is the girl who jumps in my lap uninvited - for me, no thank you is so much easier when the girl is standing or seated next to me and I haven't developed the perfect polite response for no thank you and please depart my lap. Who knows, maybe some dancers on this forum will say hey, good strategy to jump in lap uninvited cuz some PLs have a hard time dismissing such tactics. My MO #s 1 and 2 sometimes result in an obnoxious dancer response, but it's rare. Occasionally I'll get the passive aggressive dancer response but dealing with that one is addressed in the no asshole / no bitch article. One time - despite my politeness - the dancer response was: "I don't need you I'm a successful dancer and I've already made $800 tonight." I found that humorous.
• georgmicrodong

  •

  6 years ago

  The one time in the last decade that a dancer sat in my lap uninvited, I stood up and dumped her ass on the floor.
• IceyLoco

  •

  6 years ago

  just tell her to leave
• Book Guy

  •

  6 years ago

  Respectful but direct. You're paying, she's earning, it benefits both of you. You get to be free for the other girls whom you (presumably) want more. And she'll be more likely to get more money from someone else by leaving you sooner rather than later, and she'll leave you sooner because she heard from you sooner rather than later. Now what about the clingy dancer who really doesn't get it? Doesn't leave, gets huffy, calls you out to management, demands a lot of dollar tips in her g-string before she'll leave, etc.? HATE HER. Or the one who is so pathetic that she is hunting for a pity-payment rather than actually trying to convince you that you'll be likely to enjoy her company? HATE HER TOO ...
• TimJo

  •

  6 years ago

  Some great in advice in here. Thanks guys. And reading your mentions of some girls walking up and getting on your lap without permission... that actually brings back find memories of some NYC trips years ago. Those Eastern European girls were agressive and fun.
• AtticusNJ

  •

  6 years ago

  Last night I was at a divey club and didn’t want to waste any time. A kind of skanky dancer approached me at the bar and while she was giving me her sales pitch was giving me a pretty good OTP handy. I cut her off after about a minute or two, thanked her for the chat and gave her $5. She left. I’m of course fine also with a polite no thanks.
• nicespice

  •

  6 years ago

  Fart
• MackTruck

  •

  6 years ago

  Crazyjoe says he needs to go to McDonald's
• Lil_Baller100

  •

  6 years ago

  tell em bitches to fuck off!