What's a tactful way to let me CF know that I'm getting offers for higher mileage at lower prices without coming across like a scumbag? And yes, the not being a scumbag thing is more important to me than some TUSCLers think it should be. She's a sweet girl. And yes, me believing that she's sweet is more important to me than some TUSCLers think it should be.
"If you are getting extras and are happy with it don't say anything you could end up having both chics pissed off at ya!"
My CF and at least one of the other girls are open to OTC 3 ways, but I don't know if they know each other or not. I'm not worried about either expecting monogamy from me, but would like to reduce the price with my CF without coming across as a demanding and entitled scumbag. She's really cool. If I can't get a lower price I'm going to keep seeing her, but i'm also spending enough that other girls are really noticing, so at the same time it's not like I don't have other options.
"I rather doubt she is going to reduce her prices no matter what you say"
She may, but the amount of attention I received when she was gone led me to believe that I'm paying more than the other customers, but she's also cuter than the other girls (in my opinion). So I'd like to see if there's any wiggle room, but want to be sure I don't insult her in the process.
It's just not my style. My experience has been that demanding things that aren't normally on a girl's menu changes the vibe of the relationship and the tone of each encounter. But it is a sure fire way to find out how bad she needs the money.
You're absolutely right, I don't need to tell her about other girls. I guess I saw this as an opportunity to see what else she was might be willing to offer on her own without me demanding anything from her. Perhaps this isn't an approach I should be using at all.
What do others think? I'm particularly interested in what two_bits and Papi_Chulo think.
just escalate the mileage with her, see what she does... Or, go with one of the other girls and let her find out. Then see if she makes a counter offer.Either way, if you're a paying trick you should be dictating what you get. You have the $$$
I plan to. This was on the horizon before the competition came out of the woodwork. I think it will make a difference in her effort.
"if you're a paying trick you should be dictating what you get. You have the $$$"
I hear ya, but it's not my style and it changes the vibe. Plenty of others are offering in a way that would not require me to "dictate" and I'll probably spend some time with them. But with this other girl I'm enjoying it for what it is. Now she's taking it for granted and the other girls see this as an opportunity. It be fine if she just put more effort into it and does a bit more, in whatever way suits her. If she acknowledges the competition and lowers the price, then all the better.
Once you start paying a dancer $X there isn't a non-painful way to get her to accept less than $X.
If you're overpaying then she should be able to accept the going-rate, although the going-rate can be hard to peg, and just bc other dancers will do it cheaper doesn't necessarily mean you're overpaying.
If she's better looking than the other girls and gives you good mileage, then paying a bit more is ok IMO, but if you feel you're not getting good value mileage/price wise then let her know - the reality is loyalty is not really part of this relationship, dancers are gonna do what's best for them and the day they decide to move on from dancing they're not gonna be thinking about you and you probably won't hear from them again.
You don't owe her loyalty and vise-versa but it's better to treat her fairly vs underpaying her, but if you feel you're overpaying then be straight with her.
If you wanna try other girls you shouldn't feel obligated to stick with her, and if u wanna get back with her later most likely she won't turn down your $$$, IMO.
Tell her she's the best dancer that you've experienced and ask if you cam get a discount if you stop by more often. Lets say if you visit clubs 3 times a month and spend $150 on her once per month. Ask if you can come see her twice a month for $100. Strippers may be dumb, but they are like rainman when it comes to money. She will not only agree, but hold you accountable for stopping by more often!
I do this all the time as NJ club experiences are getting shitty. I now just visit 2 or 3 clubs and my favs treat me like kings for a much better rate. I dont even have the need to tip as much because they know im coming back soon.
My experience with stopping by less often is it does increase the performance of a girl in the LD room, but again strippers have an insane memory when it comes to how much you spend per visit. If you spend less she will think she did something wrong. You can lie and say things like you need to get your muffler fixed and now only see her for dances lol.
@DC9428, if someone is stopping by the club every week to see one girl they should be treated like a king at value rates no questions asked. At that point you are at least paying for her utilities bill and in some cases her rent. If she messes up she will feel it the next month.
Honestly, you guys are being too nice and care way more than the bitches do.
When my main bitch goes to work coz she knows a regular or regulars will be there, she acts like she cares, but is still texting me from the locker room or bathroom whenever she tells him she's going to freshen up for him and is either sending me selfies, bitching about what Im doing or reminding me to do shit. The regular isn't on her mind.
Her reason for apreciating regulars, and my side bitches would agree, is that she knows how much she's guaranteed that night and its easier. Its basically the "known" so everyone knows what to expect and thats it.
But its not a big deal if you want someone else or whatever. Its your money your choice.
In civilian world it seems the female is usually the one that gets emotionally attached and the guy will often not give a shit - in strip club bizarro world it seems it's always the PL getting emotionally attached where in reality the dancer doesn't really give a shit other than how much she's making.
I wouldn't talk about other girls or what you do for how much with the CF. But if you haven't actually negotiated how much you are "supposed" to pay for expected services/mileage and she's just expecting fat tips or a certain number of dances or VIPs, then i would just gradually spend less or tip her less each visit, especially if the value relative to other girls isn't there.
And i would let it be known that you spend significant amounts of money and time on other girls. That is, as soon as she leaves you alone, i would seek out the other "more bang for the buck" options at the club. She'll notice and should get the hint that she's not the only one and if she wants to take all or most of your money, she has to earn it. If you're paying more than the "market" rate or usual rate, then she's not likely to get that from other PLs and will have to eventually adjust her expectations.
What I took away from skimming this thread is that you all are a bunch of broke-ass little boys trying to play a man's game. Here's what you need to know about me - I am a grown-up man in the prime of my financial life, when I go to the club it's to drop $1,000 - $1,500 and lock up the hottest (9+) dancer in the place for the entire night. And believe me when I tell you, at the rates I'm paying she knows "it's my way or the highway" and she's gonna do her best to please me.
@PapiChulo you said "In civilian world it seems the female is usually the one that gets emotionally attached and the guy will often not give a shit - in strip club bizarro world it seems it's always the PL getting emotionally attached where in reality the dancer doesn't really give a shit other than how much she's making."
I think you have to look at it from the perspective that in this country its not considered a good policy to catch feelings for your patients clients or customers. Its a business transaction.
But guys go to strip clubs to get what they're missing in their lives and its easy to get attached to something or someone you want. Say you have a real nasty bitch at home, then the stripper treats you the opposite, or your wife is nasty and she's hot. Thats going to do it.
But when they're not in the business mindset I think strippers fall harder if they like someone
As Papi mentioned - nobody takes a pay cut well. Since you’ve seen her a few times, and paid her, you’ve basically set your rate.
Coming in less frequently, could get her to up the intensity - or to offer more - in the back room. However, I think the price will remain the same.
I’m not sure about whether you’ve done otc with her yet. If you haven’t taken her otc, there is an opportunity to speak to her about going otc. This opportunity will allow you to set/negotiate her price for an otc encounter.
The negotiation for otc pricing should focus on increased mileage and a lower price. Since you aren’t itc - the club doesn’t take any of the money - it goes directly to her. Also, you have to pay for the room - and that’s expensive!
It’s important to negotiate with her and emphasize that you would like to keep seeing her - but you are looking for ways to spend time with her without making the club richer.
I appreciate all of the feedback. Just one point of clarification, our thing is pretty much exclusively OTC. And now I'm under the impression that I could be doing OTC with half the girls at the club instead, but for less. It's a tough proposition. The one I'm with now is definitely the cutest. But I think she made the mistake of bragging about it to a couple girls at work, so now they all (1) consider me safe and nonthreatening, and (2) they know what price they need to beat.
She probably shouldn't have bragged about it, but there's nothing I can do now except decide what I want to do next.
Papi—when I first came on this site I thought you were a real dick. You have the most fair advice, it surprises me that you are so considerate of dancers, also just human feelings in general. Thank you.
OP—dude why don’t you just TALK to her?? What is your main goal, spend less, get more?? Why?? Tell her that you appreciate her and you enjoy being with her and you’d like to know if she’s comfortable taking things a little farther. If you want to spend less, you’re gna have offer something that’s a compromise, less time, less extras, giving up something. I work in a blue collar club and I know people sometimes just don’t have the funds, I can understand that and I appreciate that they still want to see me. I can negotiate but there’s gotta be a compromise! You could also suggest that you spend more on fewer visits—I.e., you usually spend $300 on her in a visit, twice a month. What if you came once a month instead, spent $500, but received *more.*. Just a suggestion.
"You could also suggest that you spend more on fewer visits—I.e., you usually spend $300 on her in a visit, twice a month. What if you came once a month instead, spent $500, but received *more.*."
Really? That's your advice? I have plenty of funds but it doesn't mean I'm going to keep overpaying. And I'm definitely not going to start seeing her less often for virtually the same amount of money. The entire point is that I could see other girls more often for less money.
Just see another girl for less, make sure she finds out and she'll catch on. Or just pay her less. Its your money. If she expects 300, give her 200 instead.
"I think she made the mistake of bragging about it to a couple girls at work, so now they all (1) consider me safe and nonthreatening, and (2) they know what price they need to beat."
Hmmm, you know, 8-ball, some of our more unprincipled members here would see this as a golden opportunity to pit dancers against each other in order to:
Drive down price, yes! More stripper drama, though. Part of the reason I agreed to such a generous price in the first place is that this girl has been absolutely zero drama from day one. Is it even possible to bring down the price without bring in the drama. I just don't want that.
PinkSugarDoll's advice isn't bad. Usually negotiations work best with give and take. It's okay to want to pay less or get more mileage, but sweetening the pot with something else, smooths things over. Negotiation 101 is both sides get something out of the new deal.
If you don't want to, it's your money. I can't tell you want to do or that you're having fun wrong.
Otherwise, fire her. Quit seeing her for a visit. Then just start fresh with a new deal.
Show, don't tell. Demonstrate to her you got options and are willing to act on those options. The thing that gets girls ramped up more than anything is jealousy. When your main fave sees you with another dancer, and having just as much with said dancer as you do with her, main fave will learn to up her game. Women are very perceptive about shit like this.
If not, you were never one of her best regulars and there was no chance for change anyways.
Dominic77 - please review her math. It's biased advise from a stripper. She's telling me what she would want the customer to do in order to benefit her, and it has nothing to do with getting the girl to go for what I want.
stripfighter - I consider this the best answer so far. And I do believe myself to be her best customer. She's never not available when I text. I'll let everyone know how it goes.
You are treating the club like high school, you’re supposed to go for you’re own enjoyment, tryin to make strippers jealous, is stupid and counterproductive
Hey ei8ht ball, I did not mean to offend you. I don’t have a bias because I don’t benefit from your situation at all?? It affects/benefits me zero, not at all. You are asking for opinions, I offered a suggestion. I don’t wish anything bad for you buddy, affects me zero.
8-ball - trying to play these kind of games with a favoritie is a douche move, disrespectful to the dancer, and likely to backfire in your face eventually.
What you need to do is wait until she has some kind of emergency (car breaks down, kid's in hospital) so she's desperate for cash, then you renegotiate.
@two_shits
“What you need to do is wait until she has some kind of emergency (car breaks down, kid's in hospital) so she's desperate for cash, then you renegotiate.”
That seems like a RickiBoi move I thought you were my troll, I mean WTF ;)
Of course, say you spend $500 a week and can only spend $300. That's still a guaranteed $300 in her pocket. Only an idiot would rather have $0 than that.
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My CF and at least one of the other girls are open to OTC 3 ways, but I don't know if they know each other or not. I'm not worried about either expecting monogamy from me, but would like to reduce the price with my CF without coming across as a demanding and entitled scumbag. She's really cool. If I can't get a lower price I'm going to keep seeing her, but i'm also spending enough that other girls are really noticing, so at the same time it's not like I don't have other options.
She may, but the amount of attention I received when she was gone led me to believe that I'm paying more than the other customers, but she's also cuter than the other girls (in my opinion). So I'd like to see if there's any wiggle room, but want to be sure I don't insult her in the process.
It's just not my style. My experience has been that demanding things that aren't normally on a girl's menu changes the vibe of the relationship and the tone of each encounter. But it is a sure fire way to find out how bad she needs the money.
You're absolutely right, I don't need to tell her about other girls. I guess I saw this as an opportunity to see what else she was might be willing to offer on her own without me demanding anything from her. Perhaps this isn't an approach I should be using at all.
What do others think? I'm particularly interested in what two_bits and Papi_Chulo think.
I plan to. This was on the horizon before the competition came out of the woodwork. I think it will make a difference in her effort.
"if you're a paying trick you should be dictating what you get. You have the $$$"
I hear ya, but it's not my style and it changes the vibe. Plenty of others are offering in a way that would not require me to "dictate" and I'll probably spend some time with them. But with this other girl I'm enjoying it for what it is. Now she's taking it for granted and the other girls see this as an opportunity. It be fine if she just put more effort into it and does a bit more, in whatever way suits her. If she acknowledges the competition and lowers the price, then all the better.
If you're overpaying then she should be able to accept the going-rate, although the going-rate can be hard to peg, and just bc other dancers will do it cheaper doesn't necessarily mean you're overpaying.
If she's better looking than the other girls and gives you good mileage, then paying a bit more is ok IMO, but if you feel you're not getting good value mileage/price wise then let her know - the reality is loyalty is not really part of this relationship, dancers are gonna do what's best for them and the day they decide to move on from dancing they're not gonna be thinking about you and you probably won't hear from them again.
You don't owe her loyalty and vise-versa but it's better to treat her fairly vs underpaying her, but if you feel you're overpaying then be straight with her.
If you wanna try other girls you shouldn't feel obligated to stick with her, and if u wanna get back with her later most likely she won't turn down your $$$, IMO.
I do this all the time as NJ club experiences are getting shitty. I now just visit 2 or 3 clubs and my favs treat me like kings for a much better rate. I dont even have the need to tip as much because they know im coming back soon.
When my main bitch goes to work coz she knows a regular or regulars will be there, she acts like she cares, but is still texting me from the locker room or bathroom whenever she tells him she's going to freshen up for him and is either sending me selfies, bitching about what Im doing or reminding me to do shit. The regular isn't on her mind.
Her reason for apreciating regulars, and my side bitches would agree, is that she knows how much she's guaranteed that night and its easier. Its basically the "known" so everyone knows what to expect and thats it.
But its not a big deal if you want someone else or whatever. Its your money your choice.
sounds like you know a lot of pussies
And i would let it be known that you spend significant amounts of money and time on other girls. That is, as soon as she leaves you alone, i would seek out the other "more bang for the buck" options at the club. She'll notice and should get the hint that she's not the only one and if she wants to take all or most of your money, she has to earn it. If you're paying more than the "market" rate or usual rate, then she's not likely to get that from other PLs and will have to eventually adjust her expectations.
What I took away from skimming this thread is that you all are a bunch of broke-ass little boys trying to play a man's game. Here's what you need to know about me - I am a grown-up man in the prime of my financial life, when I go to the club it's to drop $1,000 - $1,500 and lock up the hottest (9+) dancer in the place for the entire night. And believe me when I tell you, at the rates I'm paying she knows "it's my way or the highway" and she's gonna do her best to please me.
I think you have to look at it from the perspective that in this country its not considered a good policy to catch feelings for your patients clients or customers. Its a business transaction.
But guys go to strip clubs to get what they're missing in their lives and its easy to get attached to something or someone you want. Say you have a real nasty bitch at home, then the stripper treats you the opposite, or your wife is nasty and she's hot. Thats going to do it.
But when they're not in the business mindset I think strippers fall harder if they like someone
Phatboy99 - definite troll account
two_bit - parody troll account
Lil_Baller100 - comedic troll account
Coming in less frequently, could get her to up the intensity - or to offer more - in the back room. However, I think the price will remain the same.
I’m not sure about whether you’ve done otc with her yet. If you haven’t taken her otc, there is an opportunity to speak to her about going otc. This opportunity will allow you to set/negotiate her price for an otc encounter.
The negotiation for otc pricing should focus on increased mileage and a lower price. Since you aren’t itc - the club doesn’t take any of the money - it goes directly to her. Also, you have to pay for the room - and that’s expensive!
It’s important to negotiate with her and emphasize that you would like to keep seeing her - but you are looking for ways to spend time with her without making the club richer.
Finding good advice here can be a bit of a challenge.
She probably shouldn't have bragged about it, but there's nothing I can do now except decide what I want to do next.
Cashman—good advice
Papi—when I first came on this site I thought you were a real dick. You have the most fair advice, it surprises me that you are so considerate of dancers, also just human feelings in general. Thank you.
OP—dude why don’t you just TALK to her?? What is your main goal, spend less, get more?? Why?? Tell her that you appreciate her and you enjoy being with her and you’d like to know if she’s comfortable taking things a little farther. If you want to spend less, you’re gna have offer something that’s a compromise, less time, less extras, giving up something. I work in a blue collar club and I know people sometimes just don’t have the funds, I can understand that and I appreciate that they still want to see me. I can negotiate but there’s gotta be a compromise! You could also suggest that you spend more on fewer visits—I.e., you usually spend $300 on her in a visit, twice a month. What if you came once a month instead, spent $500, but received *more.*. Just a suggestion.
Really? That's your advice? I have plenty of funds but it doesn't mean I'm going to keep overpaying. And I'm definitely not going to start seeing her less often for virtually the same amount of money. The entire point is that I could see other girls more often for less money.
Hmmm, you know, 8-ball, some of our more unprincipled members here would see this as a golden opportunity to pit dancers against each other in order to:
1) Drive down price of OTC to $200, and
2) Create more stripper drama in the club.
Good thing you're not like that, right?
If you don't want to, it's your money. I can't tell you want to do or that you're having fun wrong.
Otherwise, fire her. Quit seeing her for a visit. Then just start fresh with a new deal.
If not, you were never one of her best regulars and there was no chance for change anyways.
stripfighter - I consider this the best answer so far. And I do believe myself to be her best customer. She's never not available when I text. I'll let everyone know how it goes.
What you need to do is wait until she has some kind of emergency (car breaks down, kid's in hospital) so she's desperate for cash, then you renegotiate.
Maybe the rest of us should just keep our comments to ourselves while they DP you.
“What you need to do is wait until she has some kind of emergency (car breaks down, kid's in hospital) so she's desperate for cash, then you renegotiate.”
That seems like a RickiBoi move I thought you were my troll, I mean WTF ;)