How to get rid of the lingering dancers?
JeffTUSCL
California
When I go to a place and am sitting trying to keep track of the talent, or be open to being approached, what's the least asshole way to tell a girl who is otherwise cool to talk to but not your thing to leave so that she stops cockblocking? I would not mind if the girl was what interested me physically to consider getting dances with but it's just a drag to tolerate. If I were there for conversation like a hostess club or something I wouldn't mind but it gets annoying when these types just sit there and never get up even when it's clear I'm not going to spend a dime on them. I can't be THAT charming.
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Or I tell them I'm not planning on getting any dances and I don't wanna waste her time.
> I just tell them I wanna chill and just watch the stage for a while.
What has always worked in those situations is immediately make her your wingman. Ask her about the hot blonde over there. What is her name? She is just my type. She looks like she would be fun in VIP. The cling-on dancer either 1. quickly excuses her self, 2. provides maybe some useful 411, or 3. goes and gets the girl you want. #2 & #3 may even get her a $5 or $10 tip. Everyone wins.
Only once did a cling-on start stripper shit bad mouthing the hotter girl. After that I didn't feel bad about being blunt.
Usually that will do it, but if she's persistent:
"I don't mean to be rude, but I'd to just chill out for a while if that's ok."
This makes some of them irritable, but I really don't care. And if all else fails...
"Look, you're really not my type and I'm not going to give you any money. Not trying to be mean, but I'd like you to go now."
99.5% of the time it never gets to this point, even with a fairly persistent one. But maybe once a year I end up in this spot with a girl who just won't take a hint. Some guys are pussies and will try to hide in the bathroom and do other stuff to shake these girls off instead of just telling them to leave, but that's ridiculous to me and it doesn't solve the problem if she comes back. Also, if you look weak, other sharks will notice even if you manage to elude toe first one.
Stop worrying about looking like an asshole. As I've said for years, in some clubs (especially tourist trap types), if you don't manage your space, then the most aggressive girls will manage it for you.
I'm missing something here. You say, "... just 10-15 minutes which is long enough for me to miss approaches from girls I like the look of." That seems the perfect out. Call the other dancer over and get dances from her. THAT should end the time with the "hanger on",
Definitely way more than the customer who acts like they are about to buy a dance in a couple of songs from now, but don’t. And try to grope you and talk your ear off for free. That, imo, is the douchiest.
If she pushes it like that I'd have no problem saying "someone else"
Customer: I'm waiting a specific dancer.
Stripper: Oh, who?
Customer: Not you.
If you are polite and say "maybe later" or perhaps say "im waiting for Sapphire" you'd be surprised how quickly your fav will emerge from changing room to greet you. This is very helpful if girls start to learn that you are a regular and tip well. I would say all women know who my favorite is as soon as I walk in the bar. Them coming by is simply a chance to remain cordial in the slight chance my fav is off on vacation which did recently.
Pretty sure that was a typo but that would have been hilarious!
She must have been irritating AF for the other dancers to deal with in the past.
Part of the problem in my case I was there during the afternoon ( which everyone on this site seems to love) and was dressed in a suit and tie. --and worse I has someone with me that wasn't as strong minded as I am.
At some point in her life I'm convinced she was a Jehovah Witness ( the ones that ring your bell and go door to door and when some poor unsuspecting slob opens to see who is there they stick their foot in the door so they can't close it)
But i'm not a rude person in general and even less so with the ladies so if the girl just sticks around in her weird awkward way i find the most effective but least offensive way is to stand up and say "Well, it was nice meeting you", touch her arm or shoulder, shake her hand even, although this is not necessary, and walk to a different area of the club (near or to the stage, bar, bathroom, anywhere really, or better yet to a girl you are interested in) leaving her alone at the table. Your intent should be unmistakable but no emotional exchange is involved. If she has any sense at all, she won't approach you again.
Secondly, waiting for the girl you want to approach you is generally not effective unless you already communicated to her to find you later although even then girls often prefer to be found than do the finding.
Lame. Too bad two_bits wasn’t there to take her away from you.
When I tried this, she looked me straight in the eye and said OK daddy, we need to put that in my mouth. That's The Secret that TUSCL is trying to reveal. Or was it trying not to reveal? Dammit, the internet is hard. Just like my penis.