Life with my ATF - part deux

gawker
Older than dirt
Regular readers here have read of my many adventures and misadventures of my ATF. She's been a stripper in many New England clubs and several in Florida. She was born on my 40th birthday and was 23 when we met and is 32 now ( making me 72 for you non-mathematicians). I've dropped somewhere between $250 & $300k on her through the years and sadly most of it has gone to drug dealers.
About 4 months ago she went to a very pricey rehab facility and emerged with a new drive to learn to live sober. She met a nice guy who is a chronic relapsed as is she. They got an apartment but at some point they fought, they relapsed and got evicted. She called, I answered, she came & stayed with me for a couple of hellish weeks . Back to rehab, then to stay with relatives in the north woods of NH.
After a week there she talked me into taking her & her BF in to my house until they can get jobs, save money & get their own place.
Her BF & she & I have had long talks and they both realize that if they go back to heroin or crack, they're going to die. They both have a child and both hope to gain custody at some time in the future.
Well after living together for 3 weeks ( with them fucking 2 or 3 times a day) I'm anxious for them to get on in their lives and out of mine. He is a genuine nice guy with a sales lead skill which if he keeps his shit together can earn him $40 an hour or more. She is lazy and acts like the world owes her a living.
They're going to look at a place and have the money to move in now. They've told me they'll be gone by the weekend. I'll miss him. Lol.
I've told her that our personalities are toxic and I don't think we should have any contact in the future. She still is as hot as ever but all things ( good, bad, & other) must come to an end and it's time for this to end. C'est la vie.

23 comments

Latest

CJKent (Banned)
7 years ago
Gawker; I just saw your comment on the Motives Other than Money discussion.
I was going to start a discussion asking about what happened, why are they living with you?
Thank you for posting the update. I really hope you can get over her and find someone better for you.
I have posted about my friend in a situation like yours and how he is a lot better with another girl that the one that is very much like your ATF, single mother with addiction and mental problems.
My friend was able to "forget" about that girl, thanks to the other better nicer girl.
Good luck to you move on and don't look back.
rh48hr
7 years ago
I thought you were done with her?

You said in a previous post "she went over the edge this time and I’ll slit my throat before I give in to her pleas again"

Did I miss something? How's your throat?
Corvus
7 years ago
Gawker, you sound like you have come to terms with your decision to truly end the relationship. I hope so and wish you luck.
anonlvone
7 years ago
so she got exactly what she wanted. same old same old. the self-delusion goes on...
Htxx
7 years ago
I get it. I'm meeting my biggest weakness this afternoon at her house. I've spent a ton of money on her over the last couple of years and have developed feelings for her. I've also started dating "real" (i.e. Non paid) women recently. One didn't work out to well, the second is looking promising but we've not slept together yet.

Sounds stupid but I'm meeting my ATF today not only for some fun but also to try and say goodbye too. I suppose it's going to be to try and see if there's any future there or not before I move forward with this other lady.

Good luck in moving on, I know I haven't been able to do so yet, but today is a new day!
Cashman1234
7 years ago
I hope things keep progressing for you - and your atf and her bf. It would be good for them to be out of your place. I hope that their independence helps them to remain sober.

Her bf sounds like he’s working to hold it together. Your atf needs to work as hard as she can to stay sober too. It seems like a house of cards - that one relapse will cause to tumble.

I wish all of you the best. I hope things move in a positive direction. I’m sure it’s been difficult to have her in your house - seeing her great body - and not being able to fuck her - since her bf is there.
4got2wipe
7 years ago
I can't see any way having the toxic ATF and her boyfriend live with you could be a bad thing. Brilliant decision!

gawker needs to propose the term NS (nightmare stripper). After all, JohnSmith69 is famous for his DSs and gawker is definitely famous for his NS!
Call.Me.Ishmael
7 years ago
Good luck, Gawker.
flagooner
7 years ago
I do wish you luck, but please post another update next month after she moves back in.
jackslash
7 years ago
Good luck, gawker.
Lone_Wolf
7 years ago
Are you fucking her while they stay with you?
rickdugan
7 years ago
This at least the third or fourth time that you've posted some version of "this is over, I've had enough!" I don't know, but I think I'll believe it when I see it, so to speak. ;)

Now I do believe that you really do mean it each time you say it. But I suspect that, as time passes, you miss the drama in your life and the connection that she sometimes make you feel. I honestly don't believe that you will be done with her until she is finally done with you, unless you manage to find something else to fill that void in the meantime.

But good luck I suppose and, as flagooner said, please update us again when she moves back in again. :)
Lurker_X
7 years ago
Pretty darn likely that after they leave, there will be some new situation in which she reaches out to Gawker for "saving". Hopefully the next update will not involve her being in Gawker's house again or him spending anything.
anonlvone
7 years ago
@rickdugan - my money says yes b/c that was the original agreement, they move in, he fucks her on the sly. nothing like true love...

also 2 thumbs up to 4got2wipe for "nightmare stripper"
shadowcat
7 years ago
gawker - you should try the "Never Ending Pasta Bowl" at Olive Garden.
Uprightcitizen
7 years ago
Gawker just a genuine question of why did you let her and bf stay at your place? Was this a sympathy thing, i.e. did you feel bad for her and bf? Are you watching them have sex for your own needs? You state you cant wait till she moves on so why bring her back like you did?
georgmicrodong
7 years ago
Good luck, man.
GACA
7 years ago
Going to be hard to kick her because she provides variable Rewards and that is part of what keeps people addicted to anything I eat gambling drugs Facebook.

You sir are an addict you need to get treated as such and this girl is part of your addiction and if it isn't this specific chick in the future it'll be somebody else if you don't get treatment.
gawker
7 years ago
Some great comments. Thank you.
1. I'm unsure if my problem is an addiction or an obsession & my therapist says it doesn't matter which, but I need to get over it.
2. I'm especially motivated to put an end to the foolishness this time because my children won't let my grandkids come to my house while "my whore" and her BF are living here.
3. I let her come back here because I have trouble saying no to her. Sounds easy, but when she says plezzz, I melt. My brain fries. My sanity goes away. All facets of wisdom fly out the window.
4. Furthermore there's a guilt thing. As her #1 enabler for many years I truly want to help her find sobriety. I live many miles from any credible drug dealer & neither of them has a car or license. Since she came back here she has talked of how she hustled me through the years, but she then says the sex was a hustle, but the friendship is & has been real.
gawker
7 years ago
5. I've only watched them have sex once. Fucked up, huh? Private porn. In the roughly 300 times she & I have had sex there's only been a dozen or so times when she's let it all out with multi-orgasmic mind blowing enjoyment on her part. This guy's a fucking porn star and has stamina and recovery ability which if I ever had, I've forgotten about.
6. The "never-ending pasta bowl" is an apt recommendation.
Cashman1234
7 years ago
I wish you the best gawker. I hope your atf and her bf can stay sober and get their own place. I’m sure it’s a huge inconvenience for you - so I’m hoping you can get back to your family very soon.

You are a good man. Regardless of your obsession/addiction - she needed you - and you have helped her significantly.
JohnSmith69
7 years ago
Gawker’s life is as close as I come to watching a soap opera. Good luck gawker. I’ve been without the DS for around a year now, so it can be done. Recovery is possible.
rickdugan
7 years ago
gawker posted: "I'm especially motivated to put an end to the foolishness this time because my children won't let my grandkids come to my house while "my whore" and her BF are living here."

Can you blame them?

Oh, and that "the sex was the hustle but the rest is friendship" sounds like a clever way for her to justify not giving you any more sex while still taking advantage of your generosity.

Dude, it's one thing to have fun with a stripper, but quite another to bring them into your family space. Maybe it's time to find other meaningful things to fill your life with, like your grandkids, worthy causes, etc. As far as this chick goes, you've done more than your part for her. She's 32 and it's time that she took responsibility for her own actions and for fixing her own life. Not that I'm buying that guilt excuse anyway, but even if it were true, it's not a good reason to keep letting stray dogs live in your house.
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