Going for finger action - How do you test the waters?
TimJo
Ohio
I'm not someone who gets out to clubs every week, but I'd say I successfully make it out to a club about once every month, either in my area or on business trips.
I personally have never let my hands roam into the g-string protected zone. Maybe I'm too polite or concerned with trouble from bouncers, but I keep my hands to the girls' hips, ass, and sometimes chest.
I had a dancer about a month ago pull her thong to the side and start playing with herself quite a bit, but I didn't take the step of asking to join in.
So for those who like to play with the kitty, either over or under whatever she's wearing, how do you intitiate the action?
I personally have never let my hands roam into the g-string protected zone. Maybe I'm too polite or concerned with trouble from bouncers, but I keep my hands to the girls' hips, ass, and sometimes chest.
I had a dancer about a month ago pull her thong to the side and start playing with herself quite a bit, but I didn't take the step of asking to join in.
So for those who like to play with the kitty, either over or under whatever she's wearing, how do you intitiate the action?
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33 comments
No comment and you push on a little bit more aggressively.
She re-positions so your kitty play is less obvious to an observer (good sign!)
She makes a comment like "not too much" or "just don't go inside" - continue and respect that guideline.
She makes a positive comment about liking it - you have a green light, bro!
She makes a comment that kitty play is for VIP - she let you do a little and is now cutting you off. Respect that.
Or, she does a move common at Follies and throws one leg over your thigh. This can be loosely interpreted as "I want you two knuckles deep"
OTOH, I have had instances where the girl was willing but a bouncer spied the action and put a threatening stop to it and later pulled the dancer aside. You should figure out what is the "norm" at that club (by asking Norm) and factor that into your exploration.
If your spending money and she's "strip club" attractive to you.
If she wants to turn you into a regular because your spending good money and all the other dancers think you're attractive (Yea they talk about that stuff in the dressing room) she'll let you roam.
The clubs in my area are bikini only. When I get a dancer back in a more private location - I take a seat - lean back - and watch her - and see if anything comes off (or gets moved aside). Basically - if she pulls her top off - I know her tits are available. If everything comes off - that is a sign that it’s all available.
Here’s something I’d recommend against - as I had a friend try this - and I had to think fast to help him from getting a beating. A friend thought he was clever - when a dancer would bend over to get a $1 - he’d put it between her legs - and he’d try to get his fingers inside of her. This is not recommended! I still get stressed just thinking about watching that stupidity go down.
After a get to know her period you let her dance for you. Rather than groping right away, sit with your hands on your knees. This tells you are polite and keep your hands to yourself. If the girl in question removes your hand from YOUR knees and places it somewhere else you can be pretty sure it’s off limits. If she grinds on the back of your hand, you are probably good to go.
Another method which also works when she is in reverse cowgirl is to gently hold her hand such that the back of your hand is facing her palm then gently interlock her fingers. This signals to her you want her to place your hands somewhere. I’ve had countless dancers slide my hand down to their g string. I’ve had a few guide my hands to their butt too indicating they liked a bit of backdoor stimulation.
I guess those methods have always worked for me and as a customer you come off as non threatening.
I can’t tell you how many girls have said at the end of a set of dances “thank you for not trying to ram your fingers in my pussy, you’re the first guy all night not to try that.”
In most cases girls will lead you to what they want done.
PL newbies please take note, Shadow Car is having such a high success rate because he hangs out at a known extras club where such behavior it expected if not even encouraged.
I’m not knocking his approach at all, I’m just pointing out do try to mimic his approach at other clubs because doing that in some clubs could go downhill real fast.
Having said it, this is generally considered very aggressive and can end pretty badly. Be very aware of the type of club you are at if you try this. If it is a bikini only club or even a topless only club not known for extras or even high mileage and contact, i would let it go unless you somehow were able to negotiate this. Strippers often choose to work at these type of clubs, specifically not to show their pussy let alone have it played with. If you're in a VIP or a room, the rules can often change. Even then, i would tread carefully, as there are a lot of, i don't want to say ROBs, but girls that hide behind rules to do as little as they can.
Now if you're at a nude club that's extra friendly and/or known or high contact and mileage, almost every girl there has had their pussy "grabbed" at some point, unless they tell you upfront not to do it. In which case, don't do it. Otherwise, you can always ask, but many girls will tell you not to do it, even if they might let you do it, say if you do numerous dances or tip them. So what i do, is i'll lightly touch around the periphery (inner, thighs, outer lips or pubic mound (landing strip area) as well as read their body language. If you pass this test, you can try touching the inner lips or the clit hood and see if she says anything or reacts negatively. Usually, if you pass the first test, you'll pass the second test as she probably knows where you are heading. But even if you pass the second test, i doesn't mean that you're in the clear and can just do whatever.
Even at clubs like this, some girls are not comfortable with heavy contact and you can tell. They won't let you suck nipples or they'll dance kind of defensively, they won't back their pussy into your face or even your reach, when they facing you, they'll have their entire pussy buried on your pants, if you reach around, they'll probably try to block it. DON'T try to push it in this situation. Again, you just have to learn to let it go sometimes. There was a time, when i might get a cheap trill or jolly just to touch a kitty (and a titty), but if you can't touch it like you mean it, there really is no point to it all.
In the old days, I had this notion in my head that if you ask, that just gives the girl opportunity to think about it and say no, whereas if you just went for it, she might let you slide. These days, I think it's the opposite: a girl who doesn't want you to touch her pussy is going to stop you regardless of whether you ask or not, a girl who will let you touch her pussy will let you do it regardless, but a girl who is on the fence or decides on a case-by-case basis is more likely to allow a guy she can trust to respect her limits (that is, the guy who asks). As anyone who SCs with a group of guys knows, strippers sometimes let one guy do something that she won't let another guy do, and I suspect her trust level ("if I let him touch my pussy, will he just shove his finger in without asking?") is part of what determines this.
In short: particularly for CFers who will be seeing the same girl over and over, I see all-upside no-downside in asking explicitly. Things may be different for variety guys for whom every girl is new to them.
An interesting aside here, I am quite certain that what you described happens often. But it's also pretty often the case that the bouncer's timing isn't as impeccable as you think, the girls all have ways to signal the bouncer. Some of the girls like leaving the impression, "I'm willing... if not for that dastardly bouncer". I remember an old ATF of mine telling me all the ways she got the bouncer's attention that she wanted him to come in and reduce the contact without getting the good-paying customer irritated with her. She'd distract the customer in some way -- usually putting her breasts, ass, or pussy in his face, but basically anything that would block his view of her face -- and then she'd making quick eye contact with the bouncer and a short nod, or if he was not in the room, look straight at the camera and do the same thing. Lo and behold, bouncer appearance and warning. Then she could tell the customer how she loved it and how she wished that bouncer would mind his own business, etc. I imagine that they could always stage the "bouncer pulls her aside" as the final bit of theater.
Anyway, like I said, very often I think it's just the bouncer catching things on his own, but the girls do have ways to surreptitiously signal them
Also, when a customer is enjoying an eyeful - and attempting to get a finger-full too - the dancer might not need to be very subtle.
In any case, when it comes to domination in the strip club, I am even MORE demanding that explicit consent be obtained, as long as constant monitoring that the intensity level is appropriate and welcome, at least until you get to know her well enough that you understand her limits. In short, I'm doubling down on asking explicitly, especially for your incredibly unlikely scenario: she will not be turned off by the fact that you're seeking to understand her limits.
Also, a dominant man wouldn’t ask if he could touch her pussy. He would ask when will she be ready to be touched. That’s a different way to ask her.
Waiting for a dancer to take the lead will often lead to diminishing returns as many a dancer will wanna do the least.
As subra previously mentioned, I'm of the school of thought that if I ask that her reflex-reaction would be to say no; thus I kinda see-it me making the move as being the initiator and perhaps getting more than o/w (i.e. giving myself a better shot - can't get a hit if you don't swing the bat) - but asking her is also being the initiator and she may be more open to it for you having the courtesy to ask vs "just barging in" LOL.
IMO it's best to take the lead/be-the-initiator either by asking, or moving in slowly as for her to see/know your intentions (e.g. rub the outside instead of insertion and if she allows rubbing then proceed as she allows, etc).
So just respect whatever limits the dancer sets and you'll be fine.
Much more easy to lead the interaction in the front room.
SJG
Her: "Yes" or "No"
..... whew, that was a tough one.