I got out!!! but now having second thoughts

49 comments

• 4got2wipe

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  7 years ago

  Are you waitressing at a strip club?
• twentyfive

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  7 years ago

  Welcome to the real world it's not as easy as you thought, is it beautiful ?
• poledancer83

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  7 years ago

  No regular place and yeah not at all.
• Bj99

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  7 years ago

  Can't you just work at a nicer club, where you don't have to flash your v? I stick to day shifts only, and it's a nice club. I have strict rules for how I conduct myself to avoid stress, so I make less than I could, but more than a waitress, and I can still be flakey and grab a beer when I start work.
• poledancer83

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  7 years ago

  I kinda wanted to be all the way out of that type club. There are several other options but the idea was to get out all together. Plus that part of work isn't why I got out it was more so to get out of the atmosphere.
• Call.Me.Ishmael

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  7 years ago

  Eventually, almost all strippers need to find other work. Though it may not be fun, you should consider sticking with it until you're pretty good, so that you have that skill in your back pocket. Also, consider bartending. Might be more your speed.
• twentyfive

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  7 years ago

  Either one of you girls have any thoughts on how you will survive in a few years when you no longer look so good that you can convince horny guys that might compare you to other girls in the club and the polite ones will say not now maybe later and you'll get some rude or drunk guys that will just knock you down and destroy what is left of your self esteem in other words do you have a reasonable amount of money saved and some skill other than showing your tits that will enable you to live like you want to ?
• poledancer83

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  7 years ago

  I think another thing in the back of my mind is that I may not have much more time left for dancing as an option and if I spend a couple years doing this and decide I missed out on a few good last years.
• poledancer83

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  7 years ago

  My self esteem is just fine. But to honestly answer that I would have to say no. I have only done this pretty much my entire life. Waited tables a year and danced on and off since I was 19 so this is all I know.
• Bj99

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  7 years ago

  What ab a couple arrangements? If it's mostly the atmosphere that's the issue. I might do that some day. I'm really fond of some of my best customers. I know girls who get over 1k a week allowance, but those ones don't come along every day. Those girl just come in now and then.
• Call.Me.Ishmael

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  7 years ago

  Well, if you don't think you have much dancing time left, and you go back to dancing, then your priority should be saving as much money as possible.
• poledancer83

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  7 years ago

  yeah that's never been easy for me either lol
• yahtzee74

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  7 years ago

  Hopefully your off hours are more fun and satisfying after a day of being a waitress instead of a day of being a dancer. It can be hard to adjust to a new job so be sure to stick to with it and give it a good chance. Good luck!!
• twentyfive

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  7 years ago

  @poledancer my advice to you is find a job that interests you and get some training so you can get employment in that area. @Bj99 you can't count on an arrangement working out long term it's like winning the lottery, and as a pretty well off guy, I wouldn't marry any woman that wants to be with me as a meal ticket. Don't think I wouldn't know it guys like me didn't get to where we are by being naive.
• Bj99

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  7 years ago

  I am well educated and have a work background that guarantees me enough income to live just fine. I'm already older and still better looking than girls half my age, which many men consider to be a plus, but I'm proud of how I've taken care of myself regardless. If a girl develops herself while she is aging, she should have more to offer than just something to look at. Besides a few conservative investments, I have a decent savings. I can afford to work for much less if I need to. If I feel like letting a guy take care of me, I could, but I don't think I'll be giving up much freedom easily. My goal is to buy a little house w cash, and live off my investments and a small income.
• Bj99

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  7 years ago

  It was a suggestion that some girls do off and on when they are tired of dancing. We all get offers.
• poledancer83

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  7 years ago

  yeah I kinda argee to some extend at some point after all of these years of dancing I would like to think I was worth more then something to look at to my customers.
• Dougster

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  7 years ago

  Join SJG's church!
• Bj99

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  7 years ago

  You are. We all see how little looks alone will get you dancing, and how a great fun personality can make up for physical imperfections.
• HungryGiraffe

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  7 years ago

  Hi poledancer83! You can remain out of the strip club scene if you put your mind to it. A few bits of advice: 1) Seek emotional/spiritual support from someone you admire and respect outside the club scene. 2) Cutoff contacts with the influencers from your prior strip club work. This will be tough, but very important. 3) Find an additional part-time gig, and cut expenses to the bare bone. 4) Take steps to further your education. Think about your natural talents and gifts, then seek certifications or a degree. Quick story. A close friend and former stripper exited dancing 2 years ago. Took her a year to get her associates degree and now she works in her career field. She also works retail a couple days a week. Most importantly she's very happy and not headed back to the work that was a physically and emotionally poor fit for her. PM me if you want more details. Hang in there, you're gonna make it!
• Bj99

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  7 years ago

  @HG, how long did she dance? Retail is a good idea. Waitressing would be hard bc it's kinda similar, but you can't tell rude customers to F off, like you can as a dancer. I always feel the worst for hooters girls.
• twentyfive

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  7 years ago

  @poledancer you sound more than a little naive, I have a business and when I retire after I sell out I have no expectations that any of my customers, some whom I have become quite friendly with over a period of more than thirty years in my business, will have any reason to support meas anything other than being friends. I know I came down on you pretty hard on your last thread but in reality I think you are a sweetheart, who wants to be liked and many of us here do like you including me.But that comment about thinking you are more than something to look at is stupid. especially when that is how you make most of your money, I hope you do get some training and find something that you enjoy but most customers are not going to purchase your looks after you leave the industry. @Bj99 a lot of what you are saying jives with my thinking I don't need to agree with everything but yes it is important to have some savings, and even more important to take care of yourself I personally am more attracted to dancers in their thirties that are well taken care of, but I doubt that many of the girls that you know that say they have arrangements will be able to sustain them long term, in fact I would tend to doubt that if they are working in a strip club they really have an arrangement like they say, as I know from my personal experience, I won't share, either she is with me or nothing, I will not be a typical stripper boyfriend and be OK with her seeing other guys.
• twentyfive

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  7 years ago

  PS @Bj99 those offers that you get are worthles unless there is a check attached !
• warhawks

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  7 years ago

  As Glen Fry once sang: "it's the lure of easy money...it's got a very strong appeal..." There aren't too many jobs out there that allow you to make the kind of cash money each night that stripping does...(well, at least not many legal jobs that allow you to make the kind of money you can stripping). I've known quite a few girls who come back to stripping after they have said they had enough. It's tough out there earning a paycheck at a real job.
• vincemichaels

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  7 years ago

  I'm crushed, poledancer, crushed. But I'm hungry, next time I'm out West I'll have to stop in to your restaurant.
• HungryGiraffe

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  7 years ago

  Bj99, my friend danced for 4 years.
• Bj99

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  7 years ago

  That's a pretty long time. I'm glad she was able to use it to get where she wanted.
• pensionking

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  7 years ago

  Without a college degree, assuming escorting is off the table, the only field in which I imagine you will earn what you were able to earn as a stripper is outside sales of some kind. A position in which your abilities to hustle and relate to people result in profit to your employer and incentive compensation to yourself. You have been charming men out of cash to spend time with you for years. Now charm them out of their cash for their companies to buy whatever you're selling. Retail stores, waitressing and bartending are NOT wealth builders -- they are fine for part-time hourly wages -- but never a living wage. Otherwise, your REAL job is to find a well-off significant other (spouse) who will keep you in the standard of living to which you are accustomed -- or better. If this is the play, then you need to think about where the type of people you would want to spend your life with tend to hang out -- truthfully, probably not a strip club. Probably not a bar. Probably not a casino nor a race track. Charitable service. Church. Office building. Golf course. You get the idea. Put yourself around the kind of people you would want to marry and be charming. It has worked that way for centuries.
• Bj99

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  7 years ago

  Outside sales is a good idea.
• flagooner

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  7 years ago

  Or in call sales
• twentyfive

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  7 years ago

  Plus with the way rentail is headed at this point with most retail stocks tanking and long time merchants cutting payrolls and shedding square footage it will be difficult if not impossible to find a job opening in retail sales better to bone up on computer skills and get a decent paying job in an industry that is doing well.
• minnow

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  7 years ago

  Serious question, pd83: Where do you see yourself in 5 years ? If you don't ask yourself that question, then 5 years from now you'll just keep repeating the same pattern you've done for the last 14-15 years: bouncing back and forth between waitressing and dancing. I'm not claiming to have the answers (though some members like pk has given some sound pointers). I do feel that there are some questions you should be asking yourself. More importantly, answering those questions with a plan on how to get there. As others have said, waitress and retail jobs aren't career jobs. No one has mentioned it, but have you considered being a nurse ? That will take training and "dues paying years." But unlike dancing, it's something you can do into your 50's and 60's. With aging population, the demand will only increase for nurses.
• san_jose_guy

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  7 years ago

  So as a waitress, can you do dances for custies? Engage in front room friendliness? Can you flash your vag? Do you plan to go back to dancing? Leave strip clubs entirely? Often waitresses are newbies who are still getting acclimated and will probably be dancing. But not always. SJG
• gawker

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  7 years ago

  The US Dept. of Labor predicts that 80% of jobs which will be created in the next decade will not require a Bachelor's Degree but will require some post-secondary education. The medical field is filled with jobs requiring certificates or Associate Degrees. Technicians can earn enough to live on and you meet serious minded men (and women). I recently had a testicular ultrasound and the tech makes about $20 an hour plus benefits and frequent overtime. She was educated in a 12 month certificate program at a Community College ( very affordable)
• Dlee305

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  7 years ago

  I go to black hole-in-the-walls. I use to care but I care less now. Anyhow I use to think, do these chicks have an out. I believe it doesn't cross their minds. They manage come cross so much money and still struggle. Then I realized, there isn't much money being made to begin with when you add hidden costs like tip outs, the DJ, security, house lady, new costumes, make-up, hair, etc. Nonstop! I just wonder when they fall out of the life, what's next? I use to wonder. Foresight! Im no saint and I get why. But foresight. These comments are euphemisms and optimistic deflections. Likely you're never going to make the money you have as easily. Even as an entrepreneur. It's a job that requires even more time.
• shailynn

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  7 years ago

  Wow lots of solid advice on this thread. Unfortunately being a stripper has a shelf life. There's no shame in going back to stripping but one day you're going to wake up, and be too old to continue earning. Nobody can say what age that is, I see strippers that are 30 not earning, and I see strippers who are 45 with guys lined up waiting for them. I'd say your best bet is getting a technical degree like Gawker said (probably medical field related) or sales. You seem to have an outgoing personality, auto sales may be good for you. There are a lot of women out there that want to buy a car without a man and dealing with a woman puts them more at ease.
• poledancer83

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  7 years ago

  That's something I think im going to look into!
• sharkhunter

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  7 years ago

  I believe there are career tests you can take to find out what you like and what you are good at or may be interested in studying if studying for a technical field is what you want to do. Of course you need to learn skills with almost any job. In car sales, I believe some might want you to know something about cars but I'm no expert and am not a salesman. I could guess that eyeing up customers, getting an idea of income etc, just like dancers already do, then applying that with a few questions to what they are looking for in a vehicle and what they are going to use it for. In that respect, knowing the vehicles would help. An unethical sales person might just point out a vehicle with higher margin, etc. but they say the customer is always right at Burger King. Might need to know how to handle some financing if a financial dept doesn't handle all that. I'm real good at math so everything math seems pretty simple most of the time. I've seen cashiers struggle and get out a calculator trying to think of how much change to give me and sometimes just give them the answer off the top of my head if I get tired of waiting for them to calculate with a calculator. That's life. Waiting on others everywhere you go.
• sharkhunter

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  7 years ago

  I believe my career test included a diverse area of meteorology, business, finance, engineering, scientist, astronomer, etc. Then I thought about the job market. If I had studied meteorology I thought I might be working in the boondocks collecting data or would be on tv having to wear a suit and tie, neither option sounded good. I studied something else. Two years later one of my friends said, wow, you should see all the hot girls in the meteorology class. I wondered if I studied the wrong thing.
• JuiceBox69

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  7 years ago

  If you happened to save a decent nest egg from your days of stripping I could coach you over the phone on how to play live poker for a living
• Dougster

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  7 years ago

  If you happened to save a nest egg just short some treasuries and then no monetary worries henceforth.
• vajmon

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  7 years ago

  Maybe you should try getting knocked up. Then you can become a "welfare mom and won't have to work. That's what most other ex-strippers do!
• JuiceBox69

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  7 years ago

  Doug Amen to that Or invest in some bitcoin like I did I'm swimming in cryptic currency right now bitcoin is over $2,000 a bit and I got in at $947
• Mainster

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  7 years ago

  "Auto sales", Shailynn? Really? Do you want her to just abandon her immortal soul? Sheesh.
• Estafador

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  7 years ago

  You sound more like a wealthy person who was forced to downsize their lifestyle due to a huge pitfall.
• NinaBambina

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  7 years ago

  Do you have any connections from customers or from people outside of the club? Stripping has been a great networking source for me. Perhaps it could be for you if you ever went back. Let's face it, being a waitress sucks. I was a waitress at casual diners, sports bars, and even finer dining and I hated it. By the time I got to the sports bar there were actually days where I wished there would be a kitchen fire just so I'd be able to have a few days off from that wretched place. I took about 6-8 months off (I had saved up enough money and calculated that that was a about the time frame I could go without working and still paying rent and other bills). I knew I wouldn't have a problem finding another waitressing job, I just hated it. I got another waitressing gig and hated the atmosphere before I even finished training. Then I tried one more place and told myself 'this is my last waitressing gig, after this I will strip.' ...and that's what happened. Now I'm still in school, part time, so I can also stack money and do my paralegal internship as well so I can have work experience on my résumé. A family friend of ours is a wealthy real estate broker so I am about to start taking the courses and test to become a licensed real estate agent, he says he will hire me once I'm licensed. I think it will be fun to do open houses and I think I'd be great at it, perfect side hustle. Perhaps you should think about going into real estate? You'll make way more than im retail and you'll have way more leniency with picking your hours than waitressing. So, if I end up hating law, I can fall back on my real estate experience or even use the "sales" aspect to land a job as a pharmaceutical rep. Do you want to be out of the strip clubs completely? Maybe the club you worked at would let you bartend? You will be more structure as a bartender than a stripper so less likely to get pulled into drama and bad stuff.
• Papi_Chulo

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  7 years ago

  Not having a skill or degree/certification means one will often get shitty jobs and often get treated like shit - and on top of that one does not have many options. If one wants a better life one has to make it for themselves and put in the time and effort ("there is no free lunch"). As others have mentioned, there are a lot of careers that can pay well w/o necessarily doing a 4-year degree thing (often 1 or 2 years) - and as others have mentioned the medical field hires a lot of people due to our current demographics and aging population that will require lots of medical services and this demographic trend will not change any time soon - and there are many different type jobs in the medical field not just being a nurse Similar to stripping, one needs to be proactive and not just sit on their ass and wait/hope for the right job (custy) to fall on their lap - IMO successful people are so b/c: 1) they keep trying - they don't give up at the first failure - many successful people have had many failures b/f they found their niche 2) people tend to be successful if they are a good fit at what they do according to their natural abilities - i.e. IMO it is often a mistake to choose a career just b/c it pays well; many people end up frustrated and not good at their job b/c they chose something for the $$$ that was not a good fit for them Start researching possible careers online that would seem a good fit for you - local community colleges can also be of help and they have resources to help one find the right fit/career for them. Best of luck.
• georgmicrodong

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  7 years ago

  So, not to be a creepy pervert, but do you think we could still get some naked pictures once in a while? :)
• NinaBambina

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  7 years ago

  "Maybe you should try getting knocked up. Then you can become a "welfare mom and won't have to work. That's what most other ex-strippers do!" Vajmon, was that comment in any way constructive advice and did it actually contribute to the thread in any way? No. Plus I could be wrong but I'm pretty sure she has stated before that she has given birth already. Your comment wasn't even a funny joke, go back to begging women to let you shave their pubes.