There's a stripper at the one of my go to clubs, who've I become cool with. We've been out to eat twice. The first time was after she got out of class and the second time was after her shift. I paid the bill each time. When I come in the club she'll always come over and we'll chat for a good while or she'll invite me out to the smoking area and she doesn't really hustle me for dances. Usually if we do do dances it's just 2-3. And the dances have no mileage and I don't think I've yet to try to even push further with her.
My question is should I ask her about OTC or just keep things cool how they are?
Ch3ll, it's weird to even ask... I always pretty much know my agenda with any stripper. I love drinking with the girls, and I HAVE had relationships with strippers where we go out for drinks before, after, or during (at clubs where girls get mid-shift breaks) their shifts, and I'm satisfied with that. But if I have an urge to have sex with them, I ask, I find this is a no-risk proposition -- she says yes and we have sex, she says no and she just wants to keep it to drinks (which is fine with me). This isn't a civilian relationship, it has never happened to me that because I asked her OTC, she got insulted that I was overstepping my bounds and cut me off entirely... worst case, you'll just stay with doing drinks together.
Exactly whay Subraman said. If you want, just ask. if she is offended (not likely at all) she wont show it. She'll be happy getting your money the way she has already.
-->"Are you happy with what you've got? If yes, why push it. If your not or don't care about losing it, then go for it."
jester, this is the part I (and a number of the other posters) strongly disagree with. I think you're looking at this through the wrong lens. Asking about OTC is not "pushing it", and there's very close to no risk for "losing it", IME ... the only way those things could apply is if she's got "real" feelings for the PL, and she'll get offended ... she doesn't, and she won't. There's literally vanishingly-close to 0 risk in asking -- she might say no, but as long as he asks respectfully, things will just stay the way they are. Although I suppose there IS risk -- if he gets annoyed that she says no, or feels weird or awkward about it, that could fuck things up, but that's on him
He seems to have a pretty friendly relationship with her. If you don't think offering her cash for sex could upset the applecart you're not thinking, how often we talk about how crazy these strippers are?
Not to mention he says her dances are no mileage, doesn't really scream OTC to me. And even if she's up for it, it radically changes the dynamic.
The only thing I'd add is that if you think she might actually be offended by an offer of OTC P4P (I've met a few who were "*not* a prostitute, damnit!", and it doesn't hurt to hedge one's bets), don't frame it that way right off. Be prepared to say something like,"well, of course I'll make it worth your while."
Again though, like Subraman, I find it unlikely that she'd be so offended by an offer that it would destroy your "relationship." It took me about two visits to ask the MILF out, and she turned me down flat, with something very close to the quote above. I then spent the next few months having non-sex fun with her in the club. It wasn't until I basically shoved my face in her crotch in VIP one day that she finally agreed to OTC. Still unpaid though. She says she could handle her husband finding out she's fucking someone else, but she couldn't handle him finding out it's paid. She says nothing about paying her in the club, even though nothing happens there. :)
If ITC extrs are possible in the club then test the VIP waters - if she's not down w/ ITC/VIP fucking then OTC is probably a no -go - although some dancers may do OTC and not ITC-extras perhaps b/c they don't want that rep
I prefer to make it more palatable to a dancer I've befriended. Inevitably, they mention the need for money. This opens the door for an offer of pay for play. I recently met a dancer, did two lap dances and asked her what happens in VIP. She replied that it depends on what you want. I told her a bbbj and she gave me a price which I accepted. During the bj I told her I was going to cum and she kept stroking and sucking and then spit my spunk on the floor. If I asked her for OTC I'm 100% sure she say when?
Another dancer I've known for years has finally agreed to a hj in VIP and we've met outside for lunch and text each other frequently. I've met her baby and know she's told other dancers about gifts I've given her. I hesitatingly asked her about OTC and she wasn't offended and yet made it very clear that wasn't ever going to be available. She told me of a recent offer of two OTC sessions per week with a wealthy man who offered $10,000 a month. She said she knew she could have gotten him up to $12000 or more but couldn't/wouldn't ever agree. We're still friends and joke about what it'll take for me to get in her pants, but we both know it ain't gunna happen.
Of course you should push for OTC p4p. If you can't fuck her, what use is she? Right now you have the worst of all worlds. You take her out, pay for the meals and who knows what else, listen to her babble about her various dramatic life shit, yet don't get any pussy for your troubles.
Message to Ch: She isn't going to marry you or even be some lifelong special friend. Just in case you were confused, she won't be asking you to be one of her kid's Godfather and your invite to the family barbecue will probably never arrive. So why the fuck do you care if she takes it badly? Make your move already and if she rebuffs you then simply move on.
Seems the consensus is just ask. Yeah in thinking about it all I'm really not anything special to her. We don't text or Facebook msg and we encountered each other over two years ago. I think the first OTC dinner was in the first year and she brought her son which ate adult portions. The second time was last year I believe.
Anyway I've always thought her cool and had others OTC so pressing her for sexual OTC wasn't high on my agenda. If we do do another dinner, early AM breakfast I pose the question.
" If you can't fuck her, what use is she? "
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LOL! You don't need 10 yrs of training, med school, and residency in psychiatry to diagnose TUSCL's premier narcissist. @Dugan, you're truly a cartoon character.
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Personally I'd see where it went on it's own. If I felt like it dead ended then I might ask.
jester, this is the part I (and a number of the other posters) strongly disagree with. I think you're looking at this through the wrong lens. Asking about OTC is not "pushing it", and there's very close to no risk for "losing it", IME ... the only way those things could apply is if she's got "real" feelings for the PL, and she'll get offended ... she doesn't, and she won't. There's literally vanishingly-close to 0 risk in asking -- she might say no, but as long as he asks respectfully, things will just stay the way they are. Although I suppose there IS risk -- if he gets annoyed that she says no, or feels weird or awkward about it, that could fuck things up, but that's on him
He seems to have a pretty friendly relationship with her. If you don't think offering her cash for sex could upset the applecart you're not thinking, how often we talk about how crazy these strippers are?
Not to mention he says her dances are no mileage, doesn't really scream OTC to me. And even if she's up for it, it radically changes the dynamic.
The only thing I'd add is that if you think she might actually be offended by an offer of OTC P4P (I've met a few who were "*not* a prostitute, damnit!", and it doesn't hurt to hedge one's bets), don't frame it that way right off. Be prepared to say something like,"well, of course I'll make it worth your while."
Again though, like Subraman, I find it unlikely that she'd be so offended by an offer that it would destroy your "relationship." It took me about two visits to ask the MILF out, and she turned me down flat, with something very close to the quote above. I then spent the next few months having non-sex fun with her in the club. It wasn't until I basically shoved my face in her crotch in VIP one day that she finally agreed to OTC. Still unpaid though. She says she could handle her husband finding out she's fucking someone else, but she couldn't handle him finding out it's paid. She says nothing about paying her in the club, even though nothing happens there. :)
Might work, might not, but what the hell, give her the chance to accept your offer.
Another dancer I've known for years has finally agreed to a hj in VIP and we've met outside for lunch and text each other frequently. I've met her baby and know she's told other dancers about gifts I've given her. I hesitatingly asked her about OTC and she wasn't offended and yet made it very clear that wasn't ever going to be available. She told me of a recent offer of two OTC sessions per week with a wealthy man who offered $10,000 a month. She said she knew she could have gotten him up to $12000 or more but couldn't/wouldn't ever agree. We're still friends and joke about what it'll take for me to get in her pants, but we both know it ain't gunna happen.
Message to Ch: She isn't going to marry you or even be some lifelong special friend. Just in case you were confused, she won't be asking you to be one of her kid's Godfather and your invite to the family barbecue will probably never arrive. So why the fuck do you care if she takes it badly? Make your move already and if she rebuffs you then simply move on.
I've never had a stripper flip a table and stop spending time with me because I asked for sex.
Anyway I've always thought her cool and had others OTC so pressing her for sexual OTC wasn't high on my agenda. If we do do another dinner, early AM breakfast I pose the question.
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LOL! You don't need 10 yrs of training, med school, and residency in psychiatry to diagnose TUSCL's premier narcissist. @Dugan, you're truly a cartoon character.