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Failed Four Loko Flavors

Avatar for shailynn
shailynnThey never tell you what you need to know.

I was reading an article recently (sorry lost the link) about failed Four Loko flavors - I'll share them with you along with the can colors:

Curry Flavored Four Loko (neon orange)

Dirty Stripper Panties Four Loko (silver with brown stripes)

Nacho Cheese Four Loko (yellow)

Hot Dog and Sauerkraut Four Loko (pink with gold stripes)

Cool Ranch Doritos Four Loko (light blue)

Ketchup and Onions Four Loko (red)

Comments

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Avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive

You missed the kale & broccoli a real healthy combo.

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Avatar for ime
ime

From the San Jose regional collection

Chloroform and rope (gray)

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ime

Gravy and Loneliness (brown and blue)

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twentyfive

Sorry I forgot to add the bottle color is envy green for the kale broccoli combo 4 locos smoothie.

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Avatar for warhawks
warhawks

Why don't you want to taco about it?

Because I'm nacho friend anymore.

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Avatar for JimGassagain
JimGassagain

What is with all the kale propogandA? I hate kale, it tastes like bug spray.

In fact on the ingredient list for bug spray it says "made with kale"!

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Avatar for Dominic77
Dominic77

^^^ Best I can guess is 1. It tastes bad and 2. its really fibrous, so (.. mental gymnastics ...) it must be better than spinach or other things probably equally nutritious but taste 1000% better. Typical liberal logic.

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Avatar for Dominic77
Dominic77

From the Freshmen sorority pledge collection:

Vodka and Kool Aid Four Loko (pink can).

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Avatar for Dominic77
Dominic77

From I drink during the afternoon playing hookie from work and need integrated hangover-remedy-in-a-can collection:

Bloody Mary mix Four Loko (red can) B-vitamins infused, just add black pepper, celery stick, and vodka.

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Avatar for Dominic77
Dominic77

From the I work in finance (for the money) and hate my life collection:

Black and Blue Four Loko (two layers, different density)

Top layer is caffeine to start your day (sip slowly).

Bottom layer is alcohol, to end you day, cry yourself to sleep. ... at least you kids are in the right school(s) but your wife still won't sleep with you.

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Avatar for Dominic77
Dominic77

From the I need to bulk up and get jacked collection:

Top layer is raw egg for protein.

Bottom layer is tuna fish (same)

With a creatine finish. (in a black can)

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Avatar for Dominic77
Dominic77

For the liberals in safe spaces collection:

Empower Mint Four Loko (in democratic blue can).

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Dominic77

Caffeine free diet Four Loko. (why bother?)

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Avatar for Dominic77
Dominic77

Urban Poverty Four Loko. (Black can)

... it smells sort of like curry cooked in an apartment from the hallway but it also reminds you of people smoking crack or if you add a human musk smell to it, it also smells like old-person-who-died-alone-in-their-apartment-3-days-ago-smell. :(

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Avatar for shailynn
shailynn

Four Loko definitely needs to add Dominic to their R&D department!

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