Let this be a lesson to all you new mongers...

warhawks
Crazy Town USA
Always, always, always wait to see a dancer on stage before doing a VIP.

My tale begins with walking into a regular club that I haven't been to in quite some time. Take a seat at the bar and have my first beer.
I'd say after less than 10 minutes, I get a girl all up on me. I'm sitting, she's standing. Being a gentleman, I offer her my bar stool.
We start the normal strip club bullshit. (Where have you danced. How long have you been dancing, what clubs have I been to, her complimenting me, etc, etc etc..)

I had only had one beer and she had a pretty face and nice tits. So I continued our conversation and offered to buy her a drink.
She knew many of the same club employees and dancers I've known over the years of clubbing.

She was pushing hard for dances. Grouping me and making it obvious fun was to be had in VIP with licking her lips and grabbing me at the bar while I stood next to her. I'm not normally a black chick fan, but she wasn't too ghetto and could hold a conversation.

Being the experienced monger I am, as she pushed for dances, I stalled for time. Having not seen her on stsge, I wanted to see what I would be spending my cash on.

Well, let's just say,after she got on stage, I realized that pretty face and nice tits was accompanied by a massive booty and what could best be described as "thunder thighs."

Needless to say,I payed my tab and high tailed it out of there.

Always, always, always, inspect the merchandise before purchasing.

While Papi Chulo might have been extastic. I would have been left with a bad case of buyers remorse.

This is my lesson to anyone who is just starting out mongering. lol. You are welcome.

17 comments

Latest

  • shadowcat
    •
    8 years ago
    That won't always work because a lot of dancers never get up on the stage. Best to get some regular dances first and do some groping. Then do the VIP if she checks out.
  • JohnSmith69
    •
    8 years ago
    I agree with the lesson. Once I got dances from a girl that I hadn't seen on stage naked. Before we went back, I asked my deal breaker question. Are your tits real or fake? She says real, and i say let's go. We go back, she strips, and before I even touch it's obvious that she has bolt ons. They are fake as a $4 bill. That's right, a stripper blatantly lied to me to get a dance even though I would inevitably discover the lie In just a few minutes. After one dance I paid her and left. Now I never do dances until I see the girl on stage. There are just too many relevant facts that you can discover from a stage dance to help you decide how to spend your money.
  • Papi_Chulo
    •
    8 years ago
    If by VIP you mean VIP extras; then like shadowcat I always get a dance or two first if I am considering extras - if by VIP you mean a VIP dance ($20 or $25) then I usually take the plunge and make it a one-and-done if I don't like the dancer.
  • twentyfive
    •
    8 years ago
    @JS69 A stripper lied to you, what nerve; )
  • warhawks
    •
    8 years ago
    I'm in Detroit.

    VIP almost always means extras. lol
  • Dolfan
    •
    8 years ago
    Agreed, I like to see a girl on stage if possible, but if thats not possible sometimes I'll go for a table dance or regular private dance first. A lot of it depends on what she's wearing. If it's a small two piece and I've seen enough, I'll dive right in. If its a cutesy outfit that hides stuff, I'm less inclined to gamble.

  • ArtCollege
    •
    8 years ago
    I thought I knew who you were talking about--but it turns out all of the clubs you've reviewed are 2000 miles away from where she works. So there must be two like that. :) But the girl I'm thinking of actually gave a great dance; I could have been happy but didn't want to stain my slacks and had not planned ahead. Yeah, even the fat-assed girls can get it going.
  • Hugh_G_Rection
    •
    8 years ago
    Totally agree on seeing how she looks and moves on stage as well. I try to avoid blind lap dances and if approached aggressively by a girl who says she paid a fee to stay off the stage, I will tell her right out I'm not subsidizing something that limits my enjoyment. Thanks for bringing this topic to light, Warhawks .
  • TheeOSU
    •
    8 years ago
    Something similar happened to me a few years ago. I was sitting at the bar in a dimly lit club having a drink when an older dancer sat down next to me and started a conversation.
    She had a cute face and was fun to talk to so i bought and did shots with her. She never hustled me for dances but after some time had passed i brought them up and her reply was that she would like to go grab a smoke in the dressing room first and i was fine with that.

    As she walks away towards the DR i finally get a chance to check her out. Her ass was a mess, i swear it was almost 3 feet wide covered with lumpy cellulite instantly turning me off. No matter how much i enjoyed talking to her there was no way i would want dances from her so i sat there for a minute or two thinking how i was going to get myself out of that situation and it seemed that my only choice was to GTFO of there so i did.
    Luckily i never saw her again on my return visits to that club.
  • shailynn
    •
    8 years ago
    note to self: next time you're in Detroit take warhawks to Wal-Greens to get him some glasses!
  • wallanon
    •
    8 years ago
    Big thighs? With the way it was being played up it sounded more like some crying game shit.
  • Estafador
    •
    8 years ago
    By stating that papi chulo would have been estatic means your issues were totally isolated. And your lesson isn't even bad because you took your own advice. I don't see where you went wrong. You didn't pay and you looked before you jumped.
  • warhawks
    •
    8 years ago

    Oh my issues aren't isolated. (Just ask my ex wife about my "issues.")

    While I don't have as many issues as CrazyJoe or Juice, I'm still a work in progress. lol.
  • 3LeggedMan
    •
    8 years ago
    I did a VIP with a hot Asian once after seeing her on stage and it was little more than an extended air dance. At the end she told me she was sorry about the quality of the dance but another girl in the VIP area was a notorious snitch. Bottom line is that I wasted no money on tipping for that performance, and actually never saw her again.
  • san_jose_guy
    •
    8 years ago
    Got to learn how to find girls you like, but also to be open minded about them. And front room friendliness, a full blown front room makeout session. Don't let girls sell you dances or the vip sessions. Wait until actually needed, like when your pants are to come down. Then you invite her.

    SJG

    Yanis Varoufakis: "And the Weak Suffer What They Must?" | Talks at Google
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2Zpkz7l…
  • jestrite50
    •
    8 years ago
    Always do your test drives out in the front room. NEVER IN THE BACK Room !
  • Papi_Chulo
    •
    8 years ago
    I've had the opposite problem - I've had some seemingly slim ebonies walk up to me and ask for a dance and I've said no - then they turn-around to walk-away and I often have to grab them b/f they leave b/c although they are slim they are packing a big-ole phat ass (which are the best of course).
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