I think I'm developing feelings for her....
larryfisherman
California
Well maybe not quite yet.
There's this stripper I've seen at one of my local clubs a few times over the past few months. She's a cute white girl who is thick (not BBW or fat) with a black girl booty. I'd rate her a 8.
I've talked to her a couple of times. She seems to have her head on straight. She has a full time job. being a nursing assistant (she wants to eventually be a nurse) she only strips once a week. Both parents are in her life, she didn't have a tough childhood. Blah, blah, blah.
I've probably seen her five or six times, got some dances from her two of those times. She seems like a cool girl, I'm not saying I want to be her boyfriend, but I do want to get to know her better outside the club, and I'm not talking about fucking her for money. She's a couple years younger than me. She mentioned she didn't have a boyfriend (I didn't ask her about that), and she asked me why I didn't have a boyfriend. She's given me compliments of being cute etc. Blah, blah, blah, it could all be strippershit.
I'm thinking the next time I see her I shouldn't get dances from her, I don't want to be pegged as a regular that's always spending money. At the same time though I know she's there to make money, and I don't want to waste her time just talking to her.
So basically I'm looking for some advice from my fellow TUSCLers.
With the strippers you have managed to fuck for free OTC:
did you spend a lot of money on her ITC?
were you close to her age?
was there mutual attraction?
did it take a few visits?
other?
Basically I'm trying to seal the deal with her, but I wonder if I've spent too much money on her ITC?
The two times I got dances with her, I spent $80 and $100 respectively.
Thoughts?
There's this stripper I've seen at one of my local clubs a few times over the past few months. She's a cute white girl who is thick (not BBW or fat) with a black girl booty. I'd rate her a 8.
I've talked to her a couple of times. She seems to have her head on straight. She has a full time job. being a nursing assistant (she wants to eventually be a nurse) she only strips once a week. Both parents are in her life, she didn't have a tough childhood. Blah, blah, blah.
I've probably seen her five or six times, got some dances from her two of those times. She seems like a cool girl, I'm not saying I want to be her boyfriend, but I do want to get to know her better outside the club, and I'm not talking about fucking her for money. She's a couple years younger than me. She mentioned she didn't have a boyfriend (I didn't ask her about that), and she asked me why I didn't have a boyfriend. She's given me compliments of being cute etc. Blah, blah, blah, it could all be strippershit.
I'm thinking the next time I see her I shouldn't get dances from her, I don't want to be pegged as a regular that's always spending money. At the same time though I know she's there to make money, and I don't want to waste her time just talking to her.
So basically I'm looking for some advice from my fellow TUSCLers.
With the strippers you have managed to fuck for free OTC:
did you spend a lot of money on her ITC?
were you close to her age?
was there mutual attraction?
did it take a few visits?
other?
Basically I'm trying to seal the deal with her, but I wonder if I've spent too much money on her ITC?
The two times I got dances with her, I spent $80 and $100 respectively.
Thoughts?
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28 comments
i think you could have an uphill battle here, larry! ;-)
Do you write this shit between 2nd period Spanish and 3rd period geometry or 5th period biology and 6th period art class?
And if she asks about your bf again, be honest and let her know that SJG was just a fling, your rebellious side got the better of you. You're over that now.
1. Larry thought he was logged into one of his other aliases when he wrote this
2. His account was hacked.
3. He's drunk and somehow forgot about all the times he claims to be rich and enjoys throwing money at girls when he wrote this.
4. He only goes to the clubs SJGay talks about and that's why the dancer thinks he has a boyfriend.
Nothing we can say or write is going to me the magic combination to unlock her. Canned lines and canned techniques are straight-up PUA bullshit from and to guys who can't get laid and who can't talk to women, full stop.
Don't buy dances not because you shouldn't spend money but rather don't buy dances because dances aren't what you want. Spend time with her and talk to her. Real confident. Be interesting. Be interested in her. Maybe tip her $5 or $20 when you leave the club, but that's it. A tip is respect. I often write that the dancer always chooses. And she does.
Your confidence in yourself -- that 'charming her is an uphill battle' -- will win her over. I've turned many of 'no's into 'yes's by being confident, determined, and unshaking. If you get the girl to think something like, "sheesh! Who does this guy think he is. And why is he so sure of himself. I've got news for you buddy." I'm sure you do, sweetheart. You can tell me all about it when I pick you up on our date this Saturday at 7.
Just ask yourself: "Is this girl worth it?"
Then I see her again or call her (not text) to confirm the date for Saturday at 7. She'll usually laugh it off and repeat the lines a couple sentences up. As long as she's not giving a clear firm 'no' and blowing the rape whistle, you just have to flirt and play. You might need to pull back on the pressure and dominance a little (if she's interested and you're pushing her buttons). You're looking for an indicator like, "well, I never told you 'no' I just didn't say 'yes.'" It gives her an opening to come forward. Some of the PUAs play mind games or try to dominate her -- without letting up -- into submission, I guess that works, but you're not going to end up with a good long term, willing partner that way.
Just ask yourself: "Is this girl worth it?"
See the PUAs have it all wrong. And most of your questions (IMO and IME) are straight-up PUA bullshit. None of that matters. Go read some of the great erotic or romance fiction. Or find your grandmother or someone else her and age and ask her how her husband seduced and romanticized her off her feet. It's a little confusing in the crazy world of 2010s and beyond (technology et al.) but the old school still beats new school.
You're the eagle. It's time to push you out of the nest.
Like the eagle, you need to use your cunning, intellect, resourcefulness to figure out the specifics, on your feet, during free-fall to the Earth. Ladies like quick thinking men, while under-pressure. You're a crucible. Heat and pressure does not crack you. Something doesn't work, you keep trying, don't be desperate, don't be moody, don't get pissy, be persistent. If you appear needy or emotional, you will turn her off. Guys who give up, they offer girls no protection, no security, no confidence.
Rejection is not failure. Rejection is not final until it is. You *can* flirt and play and reverse a rejection. It happens. Until it's final. Always ask yourself after a rejection, "Is this girl worth it?" If so, keep pursuing. And not every two people are a match for each other. Sometimes learning that you're not a match is the most humane lesson. The PUAs and the guys that can't get laid over-analyze it and get butthurt when they find out they aren't getting the V. Total betamales.
If nothing, this one will prepare you for the next one. You have to stick your neck out a little bit. Hopefully you've been lifting weights and doing cardio, so it's a strong neck. Hopefully you have been taking risks so you can face fear. Girls like guys who take the initiative. If forces her to react either with her primitive brain or with the logical mind. Then you can better get a "read" on her. This is the chase. It's the part before the relationship and before any romantic bonds are formed. It's also the part where you're trying to figure out "what the hell she's thinking, since you really have no idea." I'd rather have my hand smacked that not do anything.
Damn, I should probably apply some of this to clubbing, Lol!
Thanks dominic77 and sort of beaver_hunter for the insight. Sometimes good info gets lost in the land of trolls.
And you all know what I meant, girlfriend not boyfriend.
@govikings- the Vikings SUCK haha, they will always be the little bitch to the Packers.
were you close to her age?--NO (60-year-old strippers are rare)
was there mutual attraction?--YES (Well, strippers tell me I'm attractive)
did it take a few visits?--YES
other?--I THINK A YOUNG GUY CAN FIND A BETTER GIRLFRIEND THAN A STRIPPER
I'm not necessarily looking to be her girlfriend. I just want to get to know her better and see where it goes.
I'm still a first year rookie to the strip clubs, I'm learning as I go.
It's all your YMMV. There is no magic formula to get free OTC from a stripper.
I could write a novel about the woes from the last couple of days I just had in Vegas, but the general idea is that I'm in absolute stripper-love with Girl A, who is wanting more and more while dishing out less and less, knowing I'm wrapped around her finger; flaking on less profitable ventures like lunch the next day, etc.... While Girl B is there, offering MUCH more, for way less than Girl A, and generally being awesome to hang out with and not flaky, yet like a dumbass I can't get away from Girl A because of the feelings I have for her, and basically just being in stripper-love, even thinking about her when I'm with Girl B.
It sucks.
To me it sounds like she wants civilian dating, and that in such a context she will really deliver for you.
So if you wanted, you could do that. Otherwise you could probably make whatever happens at that club happen with her.
But front room friendliness is best, rather than buying dances. If you want her in your own bed, make that clear to her early on.
Do whatever works in that club with her, just preliminaries, or FS, then take her home with you.
In my view, I still say that "buying dances" is a chumps game. So only get into the dance booths or back rooms with her, if that seems to be the best way to escalate from what was happening with her in the front room.
Or you could just take it all completely out of the strip club and totally civilianize it.
But don't buy dances unless it is really you who are inviting her, and it is understood that it is just preliminary to outside liaisons.
SJG
Am I The One - Beth Hart Live
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uj_ujwPy…
SJG