Three Scotswomen are walking home from the pub one night, and they see a Scotsman passed out on the street with his head beneath a parked car and only his lower body visible.
The first woman looks under his kilt and says, "He's not my husband."
The second woman looks under his kilt and says, "He's not my husband."
The third woman looks under his kilt and says, "Why he's not even from our village!"
Lassy: "Laddy, I can tell yeh be wantin' to be holdin' me hand."
Laddy: "And how can yeh be tellin' that?"
Lassy: "I can tell by the twinkle in yer eye..."
(a while later)
Lassy: "Laddy, I can tell yeh be wantin' to put yer arms around me."
Laddy: "And how can yeh be tellin' that?"
Lassy: "I can tell by the twinkle in yer eye..."
(a little while later)
Lassy: "Laddy, I can tell yeh be wantin' to be lovin' me."
Laddy: "And how can ye be tellin' that, by the twinkle in me eye?"
Lassy: "No Laddy, I can tell by the tilt in yer kilt."
"The kilt was oonly fir day-tah-day wear!!! In BATTLE... we wore a fool-length goown, COVERED IN SEQUINS!!! The idea was to blind your opponent with LUXURY!!!"
With that said. Yes, I want a kilt and the whole regalia. (I just got back from the Irish cultural festival so I say that every year.) But they are so expensive. :(
Dom, show up to an Irish Fest wearing a kilt and you will be beat and left for dead.
Kilts (and bagpipes) are Scottish. Because if it's not Scottish IT'S CRAP!!!
gammanu, you'd think so, but I see lots of people wearing them at the Irish festival. It is Cleveland, so maybe we're weird that way. They also have vendors selling them and all the little leather accessories - sporrans, tassels, belts, buckles, flashes, bimoral caps, noggin wraps, neckties, leather boots and brogue shoes, etc -- you name it.
They also have a bagpipe band that plays and marches around 4PM and 6PM on fair days. So perhaps it's more of an Irish-Scottish festival.
Some of the older dudes go with the kilt/brogue/button-up_shirt/necktie combo whereas the younger lads like me see to go with the kilt/boots/slim-fitting_black_tee_shirt combo. Please one needs guts to put it on and back it up. lol.
I really want to wear one because I see about 10-15% of other dudes wearing them when I go. So at least I'm only outnumbered like 3-4 to 1 instead of, oh say, 999 to 1. I'm tough but not that tough. lol :)
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last commentHell, yea!
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I wouldn't wear a kilt anywhere.
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Dan'l Boone once kilt a bar
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Sure, let's get a dozen of em.
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Three Scotswomen are walking home from the pub one night, and they see a Scotsman passed out on the street with his head beneath a parked car and only his lower body visible.
The first woman looks under his kilt and says, "He's not my husband."
The second woman looks under his kilt and says, "He's not my husband."
The third woman looks under his kilt and says, "Why he's not even from our village!"
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Q. Why do Scotsmen wear kilts.
A. Sheep run away when they hear the sound of a zipper.
An American tourist asks a Scotsman, "What do you have under your kilt?"
The Scotsman replies, "The same as you, only bigger."
An American tourist asks a Scotsman, "What do you have under your kilt?"
The Scotsman replies, "Your wife's lipstick."
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American tourist:. "What do you wear under your kilt?"
Scotsman: "Why, me shoes, of course."
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Lassy: "Laddy, I can tell yeh be wantin' to be holdin' me hand."
Laddy: "And how can yeh be tellin' that?"
Lassy: "I can tell by the twinkle in yer eye..."
(a while later)
Lassy: "Laddy, I can tell yeh be wantin' to put yer arms around me."
Laddy: "And how can yeh be tellin' that?"
Lassy: "I can tell by the twinkle in yer eye..."
(a little while later)
Lassy: "Laddy, I can tell yeh be wantin' to be lovin' me."
Laddy: "And how can ye be tellin' that, by the twinkle in me eye?"
Lassy: "No Laddy, I can tell by the tilt in yer kilt."
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"The kilt was oonly fir day-tah-day wear!!! In BATTLE... we wore a fool-length goown, COVERED IN SEQUINS!!! The idea was to blind your opponent with LUXURY!!!"
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LOL!
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With that said. Yes, I want a kilt and the whole regalia. (I just got back from the Irish cultural festival so I say that every year.) But they are so expensive. :(
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I'd only wear one to known extras club. Otherwise, you'd just look silly.
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Dom, show up to an Irish Fest wearing a kilt and you will be beat and left for dead.
Kilts (and bagpipes) are Scottish. Because if it's not Scottish IT'S CRAP!!!
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gammanu, you'd think so, but I see lots of people wearing them at the Irish festival. It is Cleveland, so maybe we're weird that way. They also have vendors selling them and all the little leather accessories - sporrans, tassels, belts, buckles, flashes, bimoral caps, noggin wraps, neckties, leather boots and brogue shoes, etc -- you name it.
They also have a bagpipe band that plays and marches around 4PM and 6PM on fair days. So perhaps it's more of an Irish-Scottish festival.
Some of the older dudes go with the kilt/brogue/button-up_shirt/necktie combo whereas the younger lads like me see to go with the kilt/boots/slim-fitting_black_tee_shirt combo. Please one needs guts to put it on and back it up. lol.
I really want to wear one because I see about 10-15% of other dudes wearing them when I go. So at least I'm only outnumbered like 3-4 to 1 instead of, oh say, 999 to 1. I'm tough but not that tough. lol :)
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Also 12PM too. The bagpipe band, that is.
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And like 999 irish men is like 5000 regular dudes. so i'd be SCREWED.
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gammanu, you can go here --> clevelandirish.org
under 'gallery' on page 1, click Pipe Bands.
also the twitter page --> twitter.com
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I still wouldn't wear a kilt to a strip club. I will stick with dress slacks or khaki shorts.
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Cleveland is the Mistake by the Lake, so go crazy with your Irish kilts.
It's still not as bad as the Irish-Italian Parade in New Orleans.
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:)
SJG
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