tuscl

Old Fart

JohnSmith69
layin low but staying high


I'm with the DS and we are joking around while getting high. I make a sarcastic comment facetiously referring to myself as a 60 year old man. She gets a puzzled look on her face and asks if I'm really in my 60s. Apparently she didn't get the joke. I ask her how old I am. She knows this. At least she should know this. It's been mentioned many times. But she genuinely doesn't know. She doesn't think I'm 60 but clearly isn't sure.

So I tell her to guess my age. She doesn't want to but I insist, wondering just how old she thinks I am. She finally guesses. The number she gives me is two years older than my actual age, but at least it's under 60. So I tell her my real age. But I'm sure she's forgotten by now. This was like two days ago.

I don't think strippers know, care, or remember how old we are. Instead, after a certain age (maybe 40 or so), we are all in the generic category of "old fart with money."

Soon after this she's telling me about her civilian job. In the past couple of months, at least a dozen young guys at work have asked her on a date. For various reasons that make sense to me given how well I know her, she told them all no. Then it dawns on me. I may be just an old fart with money, but I'm an old fart who dates and fucks her whenever I want. I'd much rather be that guy than be a young guy who can't even take her out to dinner. I feel better now.

29 comments

  • twentyfive
    •
    8 years ago
    Didn't you tell her you are only as old as the whores you fuck ?
  • mikeya02
    •
    8 years ago
    Tell them you're 80. They will think you look great for your age.
  • Subraman
    •
    8 years ago
    Ya, they have absolutely no concept of age once you hit "old" lol... I told my fave-of-faves my age once, she just had no concept of how old (or not) I was. Luckily, it's more than two days later, so she's completely forgotten.
  • JohnSmith69
    •
    8 years ago
    25, there are limits to what I tell a stripper, even if she's a DS. That's one of those limits.
  • NinaBambina
    •
    8 years ago
    I definitely wouldn't call a 40 year old man an "old fart." 40 is not old to me, and men who take care of themselves can look decent years past 40.

    I know JS69 is closer to 60, and whether I regard that as "old" is dependent on the individual. Some 60 year olds have given up. Some look good for their age, some actually look old. Varies. But 40 being old? No.
  • shadowcat
    •
    8 years ago
    I got tired of having to show them my I.D. Now I just say old enough to know better.
  • Cashman1234
    •
    8 years ago
    What do they say - "40 is only young if you're dead!" - when a person goes around 40 - "he went too soon"
  • twentyfive
    •
    8 years ago
    Nina if they are 60 and broke then their old, but if they are 60 with 7-9 figures in their bank accounts they are only as old as they want to be right. More than 9 figures in their bank account then they become gods.
  • flagooner
    •
    8 years ago
    That much in a bank account and they are idiots for not investing more wisely. Rich idiots, but idiots nonetheless.
  • gawker
    •
    8 years ago
    My ATF was born on my 40th birthday and she's usually able to do the math when we jointly celebrate. This year she turned 30 and looked at me and said "Fuck! You're 70 years old. I shouldn't be fucking guys in their 70's. But I'll make an exception for you". Such terms of endearment.
    She's trying to develop a new regular customer who's 27 and is a college student. She has always enjoyed "hot young guys", but when I asked about her progress cultivating the young man, she said, I never said he was hot, did i?
    While writing this she called me from detox to ask if I can help her with new living arrangements when she gets out. Her goodbye was, "I love you". My response was " I love what you do for me". Life's funny.
  • twentyfive
    •
    8 years ago
    To flagooner bank account in this case was a euphemism, and I would hesitate to call anyone who is able to accumulate 100 million dollars an idiot.
  • minnow
    •
    8 years ago
    JS69: Were you high when you posted this thread ?

    Flagooner: Not to put words in 25's mouth, but "bank account" could loosely be interpreted to mean "investable assets" (those excluding primary residence) that are reasonably liquid. (Click and sell 10,000 shares of WMT, I'm gonna have some fun.) I guess your idea of investing wisely is almost anything other than a bank account. Just hope you didn't buy Enron stock in the 90's.
  • seaboardrr
    •
    8 years ago
    There's a guy I work with who is 3 years older than me but LOOKS 30 years older than me. It's all in how you take care of yourself. I'm in better shape than some of the guys I work with who are in their 20's. But like has been said when I was in my 20's I thought anyone over 40 had one foot in the grave.
  • JohnSmith69
    •
    8 years ago
    I posted this at approximately 1 pm. My high posts are almost universally after 10 pm.
  • vincemichaels
    •
    8 years ago
    John, it is what it is, I look younger than I am and I don't tell any dancer my age.
  • RandomMember
    •
    8 years ago
    "Midlife Crisis: Transition or Depression?"
    "What do you do when a midlife crisis turns into depression?"

    This one's for you, Johnny-boy:
    http://www.webmd.com/depression/features…
  • san_jose_guy
    •
    8 years ago
    JS69,

    It would have been better if you'd made your decision to divorce without the influence of other women or chemical intoxicants. We need to do this, keep our side of the street clean, while we make difficult decisions. We will have to be able to live with what we do.

    Anyway, things are as they are, so now you've got much to face.

    SJG

    How To Understand Women
    Louis Jordan - I Know What You're Putting Down
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hlfQlPoZ…
  • larryfisherman
    •
    8 years ago
    Why do you insist on posting on here when you're high?
  • Papi_Chulo
    •
    8 years ago
    Tell her it’s the evocation of a culture
  • JohnSmith69
    •
    8 years ago
    I didn't smoke weed until after my separation. And whike I met the DS shortly before the split, I didn't become seriously involved with her until afterwards. She had nothing whatsoever to do with it.

    I'm not having a crisis, and I'm most certainly not depressed. Quite the opposite. I've never been happier. And I've always driven fast sports cars so that's not exactly a mid life thing.

    As for why I sometimes post high, so what? That's who I am. I smoke weed. If that bothers you, get over it. I wouldn't like lots of stuff in the lives of others here, but it doesn't impact me so it's none of my business. Except the sleepy time rapist. That's just rong.
  • georgmicrodong
    •
    8 years ago
    I found out an interesting little factoid a week or so ago. I am older than my ATF's father, by about 5 years.
  • flagooner
    •
    8 years ago
    To 25. Accumulaing 100 mil isn't the same as earning it. It doesn't take brilliance to be a trust fund kid or a lottery winner.
  • ButterMan
    •
    8 years ago
    Yea they usually dont know how old I am. most don't even ask. Shows just how little they give a shit i guess...LOL
  • twentyfive
    •
    8 years ago
    To flagooner I don't know a lot of trust fund babies and most lottery winners only get a fraction of 100 million dollars BTW I didn't say they weren't idiots I just said I would hesitate before I called them names. For the record as I stated before bank account, was an euphemism, generally used in the circles of people I speak with for investable assets as minnow said. My point was if you have enough money you can do what you like at any age and who cares that a stripper called you or me or anybody an old fart, dump her ass out in the street, when she becomes an old broad, standing on the corner with a sign, that reads "will strip for meth", you'll still be fucking whatever flavor you like as long as you can afford it.
  • flagooner
    •
    8 years ago
    Wow 25. You seem to get riled pretty easily. All I said was that someone would have to be an idiot to keep that much money in a bank account. You seem to agree but still argue it. I guess my problem is that I don't hesitate to call it as I see it.
  • twentyfive
    •
    8 years ago
    Not riled just didn't understand the comment. I'm fine with you.
  • jackslash
    •
    8 years ago
    To an 18-year-old, you're old if you're 50, 60, 70, or 80.

    Strippers always think I'm 10 to 20 years younger than I really am--at least that's what they say. Is it in their interest to compliment me or insult me?
  • jackslash
    •
    8 years ago
    RandomMember, that was an interesting article about Midlife Crisis. It says some men start to get in touch with their feminine side by doing things like cooking. While I was married, I never cooked a meal, but now I enjoy cooking. However, I also enjoy banging strippers, which is not very feminine.
  • NinaBambina
    •
    8 years ago
    "As for why I sometimes post high, so what?"

    I post high very often. Sometimes it reflects in my posts when I'm super high, sometimes it doesn't. I will be posting high within a half hour or so. I spent the night at my best friend's house and just rolled a blunt, I'm waiting to spark it till she gets her ass out of bed. Bitch was up late watching Warriors game + press conferences.
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