OK, I'm a big guy, not fat, but fit. Aside from my size, I look like a goddam knuckle dragging cave man. When I enter a room, I get noticed. I cannot disappear even in a crowded room. People look and I'm beyond being over it decades ago. So at a club a guy is getting a lap dance nearby and is repeatedly looking at me so hard I can feel it. The dancer comes over and says I am making him nervous by looking at him, I said I was watching the girl on stage but yes I did glance their way a couple times because he was looking at me, but having an altruistic nature, I agreed to move. So I move well away, my back to them and half the furnishings of the club between us. The place is dead and I am the only one watching the dancer on stage. I don't look without tipping and I'm saving it all for my fav, so I move again to a spot where I absolutely can't see anyone, but apparently this customer says I am looking at them again and shorts the dancer and leaves after telling her she lost money because of me. I may be a tiger, but I cant see in the dark and I certainly don't have x-ray vision. I told her that maybe the guy was just making an excuse to cheap out, and that he had her, this fine beautiful attentive dancer to entertain him, how could he tear his eyes away from her to notice what I was doing anyway? When I get a dance, my full attention is on the girl, and I don't give two shits what anyone else is doing, because I'm spending my cash for my entertainment and I'm going to enjoy it.
Sometimes if I'm getting a bad or meh dance I'll look away at other VIP dances to see if I can upgrade. But yeah as long as the girl is doing her job my attention is on her.
I'm the same - I don't give a shit who is watching - I'm paying attention to the dancer.
The other customer was just paranoid - and he acted like a jerk when he shorted the dancer. Think about that logic - I think a dude is watching us - so I'm going to short change the girl? Obviously the other customer has issues and he fucked up.
A while ago I was getting a dance at Follies and there was a creep sitting not 3 feet from us that was totally intent on watching us. My dancer finally got so pissed that she told him that she was going to charge him for a dance of he didn't stop. The creep got up and moved away.
Yeah Shadowcat. Last time I was at Follies, the free loaders made the dancers madder than it did me. Turned then off to the point I don't think I got the same milage as before.
On the other hand I have watched someone get a dance before at another table. I tip her later too. I am a perv. She was dancing for me and winked at me.
I'm so focused on the dancer that somebody could be videotaping the dance from 10 feet away and I would have no idea. As long as you weren't 3 feet away and staring, like in Shadow's example, then you did nothing wrong. It sounds like you just glanced over once in a while.
The customer sounds like he was paranoid and has some other issues. If it bothered him so much, he should have paid to take her private. Screw him.
My experience is similar to shadows, guys have watched girls dance for me & its been the dancer that got pissed long before me. I was annoyed that it interrupted our dances, but otherwise wouldn't have notice. I don't take kindly to pictures, but I couldn't care less if some dude wants to watch as long as the dancer doesn't mind.
For me, the answer is simple, take the customer to a private dance area. Lap Dance area, VIP/Champagne Room, etc. That's usually the trade off between a table dance and a private dance. You gotta fork over the cash for the privacy.
Reminds me of a DS story. She is doing bunches of cheap dances for me soon after I arrived. Table of old geezers next to us can't take their eyes off her for even a second through multiple songs. They'd been there a while and I hadn't seen them tip even a penny or get any dances from anybody.
After several songs of this bullshit, with consent of the DS, I talk to them. I tell them they have great taste in women because she is gorgeous. I tell them what dances cost, and offer to let her come to their table and dance for them so they can pay her to watch. The little pussies just turn away like they can't hear me. We then went to another part of the club to play.
There's nothing wrong with a dancer speaking up in this situation if she is upset by giving the free show. And the customer can speak up, especially if like me he is doing it in her behalf. But only a complete pyssy sends the dancer over to fight his battles.
I share the same looks as the OP and one time a customer thought I was the dancers pimp/boyfriend got nervous and left....all I was doing was relaxing in my corner
Actually it was vip, but it is pretty open at this club and designed more for comfort than privacy. My only mistake was voluntarily moving as an act of consideration toward someone who was obviously unworthy of the benefit of my generous nature. The guy fabricated a lame excuse to tip a five to the best dancer there after she entertained him through at least 3 songs.
One can’t and shouldn’t expect privacy in a public place:
1) looking is not against the law
2) you are in a public place (if you are in your house and someone is looking at you thru your window then yeah that is a violation; but in public you can’t think so much of yourself that you can’t be looked at)
As others – it doesn’t bother me if others look at me and my dancer – I can understand wanting/desiring to look; but within reason – i.e. don’t get up from where you are and purposely sit as close to us as possible and stare (most won’t do this of course but there are always some douches).
I look at dancers giving dances b/c I want to get dances from them myself and spend $$$ on them – pretty much every time they have taken my looks positively as me being interested in them and wanting/desiring them – but I normally don’t’ stare non-stop – kinda on and off.
Finally – strip-clubs are often filled w/ losers and weirdos so one should take anything anyone says in them w/ a grain of salt.
One time I was in VIP and I look to my leftand this dude gave me a high five. Then because he thought we bonded over bitches he paid for a group champagne room
Imamutt - you took the high road. You moved your seat - which was a very nice thing to do. You had no obligation to move - as you weren't doing anything in the first place.
I'm a tall guy - (6'4" and skinny) and I know I can't hide. I would have probably moved too - so as to not draw any additional attention to myself. But after reading this discussion - I'm thinking it wouldn't have made a difference.
If that guy was a real man - he would have come over and spoken directly with you - and not send the dancer over. The dancer did his dirty work - and he only tipped her $5!
Wow that guy sounds like a real piece of work. You did more than most people would have done to placate him under those circumstances. No matter what it sounds like he was looking for an excuse to get out of paying for those dancers. What a POS.
When I used to get dances out in the open the stares and leers got real old, real fast. Now I will only get dances if they are offered in a private or semi-private area. VIP's are always best for privacy. Costs more but well worth it for many reasons (wink wink).
@Imamutt & sclvlr5005 I don't know how you guys get consistently noticed. I'm 6'4" and a young buck so not like I blend in with the crowd and I don't get notice half the time. Maybe I'm not doing something right.
Estafador, You said it. Maybe you are not doing something right. I never said I was tall, I'm right at 6', big, fit, not fat, built like a bull, not like a buck, thick, hairy, virile, knuckle draggin' ape man lookin', mo fo. Worked hard, played hard all my life. There is so much more to being 'seen' than height, build and appearance - character, experience, spirituality, confidence, attitude and much more come into play, but everyone knows that... right?
@imamutt yes because everyone immediately knows upon looking at you that you spiritual right? I'm not small dude myself. But I AM black so maybe I blend in with the darkness lol
Solution, go visit Platinum Plus clubs in South Carolina and you might get used to being watched. In Greenville you get watched and videotaped to be reviewed by prosecutors. Too bad clubs don't put as much security outside their clubs as they do inside.
Estafador, Not saying it is any one thing. It is a package deal and it all does affect how a person might come across to others. Man, yes, clubs are usually pretty dark. Smile next time so we can see you. You might have guessed, I'm a mutt and by definition, that makes me black too, even if I don't look it.
^^^^ Holy twinkies SJG! Are you a power bottom? Is this vintage video of you leaving the Sunnyvale Brass Room leaving with a bunch of dudes who got nothing but air dances and needed to relieve themselves?
"Finally – strip-clubs are often filled w/ losers and weirdos so one should take anything anyone says in them w/ a grain of salt. "
Ace point!
Just take this board for example! I hear that there is some weirdo that's obsessed with wiener dogs that includes the word "brilliant" in all of his posts! What's up with that?
@Estafador- dude, really? At our height I don't know how your not getting stares. Maybe you just aren't noticing it or blocking it out. It's not so bad sitting but when I stand up and I'm a foot & a half taller than my dancer all I hear on the way to the lap dance area is "damn- that dude is tall" along with the staring and occasional pointing. It gets old but like the OP I'm used to it by now.
@sclvr5005 don't know. I never hear that. Maybe because I'm young and look young (always told I look older than my age though), and don't dress as sharply as some big wigs that enter the club that I get glossed over. The few times I do wear a shirt and tie, I never wear a blazer with it. And I'm ALWAYS the sole young guy in the building next to a bunch of old folk and few big business type folk.
I'll put it to you like this, I can literally stand a few feet away from the oval bar, and I mean stand not sit, and for 20 minutes, if I don't position myself literally close to a throng of strippers of to a man who's talking to a stripper or two I won't get approached or even looked at.
Maybe it's just NY has a far different mentality when it comes to noticing people. And no these don't be the black "make it rain" clubs neither.
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The other customer was just paranoid - and he acted like a jerk when he shorted the dancer. Think about that logic - I think a dude is watching us - so I'm going to short change the girl? Obviously the other customer has issues and he fucked up.
On the other hand I have watched someone get a dance before at another table. I tip her later too. I am a perv. She was dancing for me and winked at me.
The customer sounds like he was paranoid and has some other issues. If it bothered him so much, he should have paid to take her private. Screw him.
For me, the answer is simple, take the customer to a private dance area. Lap Dance area, VIP/Champagne Room, etc. That's usually the trade off between a table dance and a private dance. You gotta fork over the cash for the privacy.
Reminds me of a DS story. She is doing bunches of cheap dances for me soon after I arrived. Table of old geezers next to us can't take their eyes off her for even a second through multiple songs. They'd been there a while and I hadn't seen them tip even a penny or get any dances from anybody.
After several songs of this bullshit, with consent of the DS, I talk to them. I tell them they have great taste in women because she is gorgeous. I tell them what dances cost, and offer to let her come to their table and dance for them so they can pay her to watch. The little pussies just turn away like they can't hear me. We then went to another part of the club to play.
There's nothing wrong with a dancer speaking up in this situation if she is upset by giving the free show. And the customer can speak up, especially if like me he is doing it in her behalf. But only a complete pyssy sends the dancer over to fight his battles.
1) looking is not against the law
2) you are in a public place (if you are in your house and someone is looking at you thru your window then yeah that is a violation; but in public you can’t think so much of yourself that you can’t be looked at)
As others – it doesn’t bother me if others look at me and my dancer – I can understand wanting/desiring to look; but within reason – i.e. don’t get up from where you are and purposely sit as close to us as possible and stare (most won’t do this of course but there are always some douches).
I look at dancers giving dances b/c I want to get dances from them myself and spend $$$ on them – pretty much every time they have taken my looks positively as me being interested in them and wanting/desiring them – but I normally don’t’ stare non-stop – kinda on and off.
Finally – strip-clubs are often filled w/ losers and weirdos so one should take anything anyone says in them w/ a grain of salt.
I'm a tall guy - (6'4" and skinny) and I know I can't hide. I would have probably moved too - so as to not draw any additional attention to myself. But after reading this discussion - I'm thinking it wouldn't have made a difference.
If that guy was a real man - he would have come over and spoken directly with you - and not send the dancer over. The dancer did his dirty work - and he only tipped her $5!
When I used to get dances out in the open the stares and leers got real old, real fast. Now I will only get dances if they are offered in a private or semi-private area. VIP's are always best for privacy. Costs more but well worth it for many reasons (wink wink).
That's what I first thought too.........and then one day it struck me.......
:)
Lol!
Ace point!
Just take this board for example! I hear that there is some weirdo that's obsessed with wiener dogs that includes the word "brilliant" in all of his posts! What's up with that?
I'll put it to you like this, I can literally stand a few feet away from the oval bar, and I mean stand not sit, and for 20 minutes, if I don't position myself literally close to a throng of strippers of to a man who's talking to a stripper or two I won't get approached or even looked at.
Maybe it's just NY has a far different mentality when it comes to noticing people. And no these don't be the black "make it rain" clubs neither.