Excuses

#1 excuse I have been given the most is "I can't find anyone to watch my kid(s)"

"I have to clean my house first"

^^^ MoHead, get your Swifter and Roomba and go over and help so you can get some ass!

"My mother died." This would have been sad, but it was the second time she used this excuse.

They (meaning her fellow strippers) would have thought she was a whore.

I can't find anyone to watch my kids is definitely the number one excuse.

@jackslash...wow. That is what I am waiting for is for the same girl to use an excuse more than once but that one is really bad to use twice

I ate bad guacamole and couldnt stop shitting

(1). I can't come because my brother was murdered. Can you help with funeral expenses?

Yes really.

(2) Got to get my teeth cleaned (same excuse used twice).

Hotstuff backed out on me one time. Said "I rather go out for Tacos with Rech"

We had a stripper tell us once she had to get up early for church the next morning. She went even further and said her dad was the preacher so she couldn't skip it.

"My name is Nina"

My pussy hurts.

"I was arrested and then my mom wrecked her car and is in the hospital." I was pissed. But felt bad when it all turned out to be true.

My all time fav is "I stopped to get gas and accidentally took a wrong turn towards home instead of your hotel." Yes I don't see her any more.

I got from one stripper my brother got early release from prison and I had to go pick him up. No idea whether or not it was true.

Oh I forgot one...rather elaborate

Stripper claimed to driver her boyfriends truck to work, and she said the police routinely run the plates in the parking lot. They ran her boyfriends truck plate and found all these traffic violations and towed and impounded the truck - uh okay!!!

I have to arrange bail for this guy I know. No he is not my boy friend.

"Brother in the hospital. Brother died. Had to go to brother's funeral." Yeah, it's always some dumb excuse.

Again #1 hands down is phone issues. ALL strippers seem to lose/break/have phone stolen. Almost on weekly basis from all of them!

I've mostly experienced the excuses that have already been posted. Nothing too wacky.

I've found that the more elaborate the excuse, the more likely it's bullshit.

mrrock - True or don't pay their bill.

“ISIS has my house surrounded and I can’t leave – OMG – can you send me some $$$ so I can give it to them and maybe they’ll leave – love u Bae”

I started my period early.