Dancer Communications

I may be more aggressive with her if I learn that my DS III candidate will fuck me bareback. I'm pretty sure she will, in which case the DS has lower priced competition.

Some people are just flaky like that. It drives me nuts too, but I think you have to just accept it. It's part of the deal with her, if you want to keep seeing her. She's a flake. If you keep pushing her to respond to messages that she ignored, it may annoy her even more, which will push her away. I could be wrong, but just my 2 cents.

I have exchanged texts with a lot of strippers in recent years. My texts are a lot like my posts here: longish, spelled correctly, in complete sentences with punctuation and capitalization. (Yes, I'm well aware that I'm a nerd.) Almost without exception the responses that I get consist of one or a few words, often misspelled, with no punctuation or capital letters *ever*. I can stand that (barely), but I *hate* it when they don't reply at all! It seems to be part of the job description of a stripper to text poorly and sporadically.

Welcome to the downside of young women.

But all of my other girls, without exception, are fantastic at communicating. Well at least they're prompt and responsible. And one of them can spell good. Only the one I pay the most money to doesn't communicate with me.

I guess nobody's perfect, not even her.

She's a flaky stoner who thinks she doesn't need your money.

It doesn't matter whether they are young our older strippers, they don't reply quickly. It's one of my biggest pet peeves but if you get too caught up in it you will end up without your otc partner because they don't realize it's a problem and you getting on them about it will more than likely annoy them.

I've only had one dancer who responded promptly to all my texts.

It's part of the price you pay!

Well, at least I'm not the only one who has put up with this type of behavior. Drives me fucking nuts.

"It's part of the price you pay" or DON'T PAY may be another way to view this.

I had a customer who came into the club a few times per month and spent a very meager amount of cash. That was fine until he began texting me all hours of the day, EVERY day. Numerous texts ranging from the innocuous to perverted. I'd be involved in an art project or some other non-stripper-y activity and my screen would light up with: "How's dirty mommy? Is she being bad?"

He would get snarky with me when I didn't reply (which was often)and I would go dark on him for days. It had nothing to do with me being flakey and everything to do with me feeling put upon and wanting my free time to myself.

Not every dancer is the same. It's a public profession, but some of us are more private than others. I don't like being in constant contact with anyone (no matter who they are) because I need time to re-charge.

@Chanel, what you describe, I would block that crazy SOB. What I am talking about is not stalking but just regular common communication.

And I can only imagine the texts you get.

I mostly only text her about details of dates, times, and places to get together. Never creepy and not frequent at all.

I say fuck em if they don't respond. There are plenty of fish in the sea.

Repeat after me: "passive aggressive"
"I'll show this walking dildo who's in charge".

A. Responsive, prompt, reliable.

Q. What are 3 adjectives that never apply to strippers?

I'm sorry. Is this a stripper or a civie? Oh, a stripper. What the hell do you expect?

Girls like Nina, Poledancer, and Hotstuff are rare.

You already compensate her for her time otc, why not offer her a small reward for always responding quickly.

I agree with others, sounds like a stripper.

I already overpay her for sex. I'm not about to pay her extra just for basic communication.

"I mostly text her with details of dates, times, and places"... Since that's the case, I don't have any advice to offer.

You're sort of stuck between a rock and a hard place (pun not intended) because she's your favorite but unmotivated by money. Unusual.

Some of the younger girls entering the business seem to be this way. I had a new dancer tell me "meh" when I asked her how she liked our club. She had made BANK in her first two weeks so I couldn't understand her blasé attitude. I thought she'd be ecstatic.

Turns out that she dreamed of dancing on stage with a spinning pole and our club's pole was stationary. That was the whole reason she became a stripper, the spinning pole, not the money.

John, John, John. Sometimes I despair.

Here you have all the money you need, at least two hot, nubile, barely legal strippers who fuck you bareback and will let you do damn near anything sexual that you want with them, pretty much any time that you want, and here you are bitching they they won't answer your texts timely.

Are you fucking crazy?

Sounds like she takes you for granted. She knows you love her. Ignore her for a month and see what happens. Or are you afraid of upsetting her and losing her?

To GMD that's LOL funny!
John you need to get a little tough with this girl. I guarantee you she's being advised by some of the other girls how she should play you, if I were you and I wanted her I'd stop letting her have the upper hand and go against the grain a bit. Just slow your roll and make her wonder what you are up to. I call bullshit on her not being motivated by money, at this point she's getting everything she's going after.

"Sounds like she takes you for granted. She knows you love her. Ignore her for a month and see what happens. Or are you afraid of upsetting her and losing her?"

This is what I should do. She does take me for granted, and there's a 95% chance if I do this that she'll come to me all apologetic and begging to see me. But it's the 5% chance that I worry about.

GMD, I'm in love with a stripper. I guess that qualifies as being crazy. The others are great fun, but they aren't her.

JS69 - your post says it all ^^^ - you have a good group of girls for OTC activities - and since you think there is a 95% chance that plan will work - I'd say go for it. You aren't dealing with a girlfriend situation - she's an OTC provider - and she probably will miss you - and she will definitely miss your money.

Obviously, she's young, hot, and flaky - but that one negative hasn't dampened your desire for her yet. She might be flaky - but she thinks she can make you wait - and that's not good. See if she changes her tune after a month without that sweet green stuff.

@JS69: "I'm in love with a stripper. I guess that qualifies as being crazy. The others are great fun, but they aren't her."

Well, that there pretty much says it all. You sometimes have to take the bad with the good. If the good is good enough, that bad is worth it.

FWIW, I know how you feel. Been there, done that waiting game. Turned out to be worth it.

Squawk!

Does she have any physical disability that interferes with her ability to text? For example, I have a hard time using your hairless ape phones because I'm limited to my beak and talons. It is actually easier for me to use a full keyboard. That's the ticket!

Squawk!

The less you care the more she will, and vice versa. Lower your expectations and fill the gaps.

Overall, strippers are pretty bad at getting back with texts. Part of this is certainly that some of the behaviors that led them to stripping in the first place, is reflected in their lassez-faire texting style. And nearly every stripper I know uses passive-aggressive texting techniques -- that is, if you text them and they are at all uncomfortable with the topic (e.g., "hey, I'm at the hotel, are you on your way?) they'll simply ignore the text.

That's only part of the explanation though. Not all strippers are like that. And even the ones who are, they save their most disrespectful behavior for people they respect the least, or who are relatively less important to them -- translation: customers.

Impossible to tell to what extent JS's girl just has a disrespectful texting style, and to what extent she's being particularly disrespectful to JS. I think there's very little to do but either decide her pussy and her attention are worth it, or whether it's so disrespectful that you have to move on. I find that the less I care about the girl, the less I care whether she's texting according to my requirements; the more I care, the more it irritates me, and the more likely I'll simply stop texting her (which essentially means stop hanging out with her, since I usually make appointments in advance)

I expect a certain amount of "flake" when dealing with dancers (for me, it's all ITC though). I don't have enough experience to help or suggest anything though. I feel for you. You're certainly paying her enough.

So most of you may be tired of this thread, but I'm not cause I'm trying to decide whether to text her again tonight.

This topic makes me feel more pathetic than usual. Cause I should do what mikey and 25 say. Intellectually, I know that I should. But I don't think I will.

In my defense, however, there is a lot of personal stuff going on that you guys don't know about (personal to her) and so you guys can't know the whole story. But to some extent this personal stuff factors into my likely decision to keep begging her to text me back. If it weren't for this stuff, it would be at least a little easier for me to practice tough love.

Who knows, maybe DS III (if she qualifies) will help me get over her. I doubt it, but then again I haven't been with an 18 year old since I was 17. She might make the DS seem like an old lady.

I haven't followed this saga too closely, but I think I read that you two "split up" for a while. When she stopped seeing you last time, could it have been related to this type of issue? You texting her, her ignoring some of your texts, and then you pushing her to respond to the ignored texts. She may not have told you this was the reason she stopped seeing you, but it's possible. Sometimes, if someone doesn't respond to a text, the lack of response is a response in itself. Maybe she needs a little space and if you give it to her, she'll be more receptive to you. However, if you push her, it may annoy her more and push her away more. This may not apply to you, but I've seen this dynamic in other relationships and it's something to be aware of. Good luck with her.

Onion, I'm not sure if its the weed or not, but what you say makes total sense. I think you might be right but I'll double check in the morning to be sure. You're not right about why we "split up" last year, or at best you're only a tiny bit on the right track, but you might be right that her lack of a response is a response. I think I just haven't been willing to look at it that way before now because I don't like her response.

Therefore, maybe I need to do what mikey and 25 say not as tough love, but as a way of me being respectful to her.

I'm sorry to be so philosophical over something so petty. I am EXTREMELY high.