Dancer is getting too possessive
Bandit5160
South Carolina
I have enjoyed some great 30 minute VIP dances with a firey little redhead. She's really cute and has great tits. I love talking to her as well as getting dances from her where she allows lots of touching. But she's not the only hot girl in the club and she is really starting to monopolize my time. If she's sitting with me and I tip another girl, she'll make a comment about that girl like "she's me plus 30 pounds". I like a variety. But at the same time, I don't want to piss this girl off to where she'll stop giving me them great VIPs either. Why can't she move around some and let me do the same?
24 comments
Anyway, I tend to handle these things pretty consistently to my overall philosophy: 22 year old strippers don't intimidate me or control me, so I'm generally up front and direct, and I'm not remotely nervous about it. I have used something along the lines of, "I'd like to get a little variety with the other girls to warm me up, and then spend the rest of the time and VIP with you, it makes seeing you in the VIP more exciting" kind of thing. If she's crazy possessive, she'll get pissed no matter what, and that's a risk you'll have to decide you want to take or not, especially if you have reason to believe she's YMMVing you. But if she's not crazy, something like that works fine, I've used it a bunch of times: just set her expectations and be upfront, and emphasize she's the highlight of the trip.
If she decides to move on from you is not a bad thing either. That's not someone you want to deal with regularly regardless of the mileage. In the long run she will use you and take all your money you could have been spending on finding a less possessive dancer.
What likely WILL happen, if she continues to "monopolize" your time, is that she will be "cock blocking" you. Just keep on going as you are. You might slip in some snide comments of your own when she "she's me plus 30 pounds" you.
I am sure you or others can come with some great comebacks for you when she makes her comments.
Ace!
In a nutshell !
I honestly don't think this is always GPS or a distorted view of reality. A stripper who is already with one customer (who she wants to delight and not rush, just like you don't want her to rush you), has a second customer already waiting, and then you too? What's she to do? She's got to make a living, and she's got other guys already there. I get it that customer management is not easy for her, either -- every one of the customers waiting wants to feel special. I do think, though, that Management of Regulars is something that many strippers are particularly poor at, and it is truly a key to success. One of my favorite strippers does this: instead of ignoring me and letting me stew in my own juices, or coming by and saying "I'll be right there" when she knows she'll be at least another 90 minutes, she comes by and says, "I'm sorry baby, I'm already with a customer and have another waiting, I'll get rid of them as fast as I can because I"d rather be with you, but it'll be a while ... I'll understand if you see someone else today, and here's my number so next time we can make an appointment and I"ll stay clear for you." That is about perfect -- a no-bullshit "sorry, I just cant' get to you for a while" (along with some white lies about how all those other customers suck and she'd rather be with me), and then her number so she can make appointments and manage her regulars. It's absolutely brilliant, and I love strippers who do this.
I think it's all about finding a stripper who offers the kind of experience you're looking for. I might be perfectly happy with OP's crazy possessive girls, because my way of SCing, when I walk into the club I expect my stripper to be free (I'll have texted her beforehand), and I also expect her to stay with me my entire 3-4 hour trip, no dances for anyone else, and I expect some YMMV in the VIP -- and obviously, I'll pay her a fair price for this. So even if she's crazy possessive, what do I care, I want to be with her the entire time anyway; if I'm too much of a high maintenance regular for her, no-harm no-foul, I'll just find someone else. OP needs a different kind of strippers, who'll give him a bit more latitude to play but still deliver in the VIP.
+ strippers know this and they use this card to their advantage – i.e. kinda make the PL feel kinda guilty – i.e. they do this on purpose or just b/c it comes natural to them as a woman
+ you are not doing anything bad by being w/ other dancers – and they (dancers) know-it – women in general just seem to like to play mind/psychological tricks/warfare; it's sorta their nature for a lot of them – dancers perfectly well-know most guys like to be w/ other dancers; so it's not a “shock” to them; they just want to play their cards so they can have your busine$$ all to themselves – it's not that they just want *you* to themselves b/c they “like you so much”; it's pretty much cutthroat salespeople competition
+ don't be mistaken – a lot of shrewd dancers are on the lookout for easy targets to add to their bottom-line – especially experienced dancers that have been at it for a while – so a nice-guy they can sorta manipulate fairly easily and spends well is a “SC golden egg” of sorts
+ it *is* often hard to brush off a dancer especially if she treats you well – but at the end of the day one goes to a SC for one to enjoy themselves and not for the dancer's enjoyment (and the dancers know this)
+ if a custy does not assert himself; it often just gets worse – I would say 90+% of the time you set your PL-foot down a dancer has no choice but to comply or else lose ALL your business (it's not as if she's the only game in town and she knows-it) – and IME; when you assert yourself often times it has the SC bizarro effect of the dancer actually treating you better whether b/c she realizes she can't manipulate-you or she does not want to lose your business; and in the end both parties will be happier when things are put in their proper place
Communication is the key to any “relationship” - you let her know politely and unemotionally that you like to enjoy the company of different dancers and that is what you come to the SC for – and also don't feel obliged to spend on her every-time you see her in the club as if it was some kind of obligation – if you feel like being with her that day; do-so – and if not tell her you want to be with other dancers that day – IME they end-up being ok with that since in reality they know that is how strip clubs work – IMO the worst you can do is keep being quiet and giving her all your $$$ AND control.
My LDQ is THE BEST. Perfect fit, personality, energy, look and curves. She gives me what I want when i want it. I vetted through 20 other girls some with better faces or bigger asses, but she is my Queen of the Ring. I dont think of my SC experience, I think of her specifically assisting my LDK.
Though she is my franchise player, I have others on call on slower nights. If I see a new girl with potential, I'll give her a thorough tryout.
I have all if their numbers and know 4 of their schedules. I dont deal with busy nights but I'm a non extras person. LDK is all I need and security watch if they choose cuz im an exhibitionist too
Papi, as you know, I have a different point of view on this. I think, most of the time, "I'm a nice guy" is the EXCUSE guys use for allowing themselves to get walked all over and, basically, acting like an intimidated little bitch. That's tough love, not criticizing the OP, we've all been there, and hell, dancers still manage to get over on me sometimes. But "nice guy" and "not let myself get walked all over" are two different things. You can have enough spine to set limits and express what you want, or otherwise stand up for yourself, and still be a nice guy, One does not preclude the other, they are different things. A nice guy says it with a smile, and words things so as not to hurt her feelings, or deceive her, or waste her time, but if you bend over and grab your ankles whenever a stripper wants to fuck you -- well, if you think that's being a nice guy, then denial is a river in Egypt.
Be nice, be friendly, don't hurt her feelings, but tell her directly: I'd like to do some dances with other girls too, but will still save the VIP for you (or whatever it is that OP actually wants).
Papi-->"Communication is the key to any “relationship” - you let her know politely and unemotionally that you like to enjoy the company of different dancers and that is what you come to the SC for – and also don't feel obliged to spend on her every-time you see her in the club as if it was some kind of obligation – if you feel like being with her that day; do-so – and if not tell her you want to be with other dancers that day – IME they end-up being ok with that since in reality they know that is how strip clubs work – IMO the worst you can do is keep being quiet and giving her all your $$$ AND control."
That, we agree on completely. This is a luxury activity for most of us, you have to enjoy it, and being nice but assertive and maintaining your boundaries is a must.
One got so bad one time that I essentially told her, "You can have *some* of my money, or *none* of it. Your call."
Anyways, this is a vaguely interesting topic: does one lose high quality service if one goes to other providers?
I think for most passing on her once or twice won't sour the well. It obviously depends a bit on the club, the talent, and her relative hotness. If she's not with you can she pull in plenty of cash? Or is it a choice you and making no money sitting on her phone?
At some clubs the dancers are very cliquish, and there's cutthroat competition at others. At the former clubs you're more at the mercy of how the girls run things, especially if there aren't several other good clubs you can hit. If there's true competition then you can leverage that to your advantage.