Here's an interesting dilemma....a good one but still a dilemma. After working on her over several visits I got a stunning, "instant hard on just by looking at her" dancer to agree to meet me OTC. I'm taking her to dinner and then back to my place. The "problem" is neither of us ever brought up the subject of compensation for her. So now I'm debating what to give her. I don't want to set the bar too high for future visits by giving her too much that its a financial stretch for me but I don't want to insult her by giving her too little. I figure the fact that she's getting a dinner at a nice place is worth something too. Would you calculate her compensation based on, lets say, how many dances she would have to give to earn the same amount of money? Pay her the same as the going rate for an escort? Does anyone have a formula they use?
This all linda depends on where you are located. I'd say a typical stripper from Miami, Flordia is going to expect more than one from Kalamazoo, Michigan.
In this situation I typically slip $200 into the girls purse when she isn't looking. I also tell her I put something in her purse and I don't think I've ever had a girl question the amount or count it (at least in front of me). When the amount is discussed up front for me I have always paid $100-$300 and that is for girls in the Midwest, Texas and Vegas for the most part. I've had girls throw out much higher numbers which I would have accepted but those girls with ludicrous numbers usually are all talk and no walk anyway.
One argument is quite often used to entice a stripper OTC. Offer her what she would normally get for VIP plus what ever the club charges you. And since I only do OTC with dancers that I know and like, I throw in a nice dinner. My last one cost me $150 plus dinner and she spent about 6 hours with me.
"Would you calculate her compensation based on, lets say, how many dances she would have to give to earn the same amount of money? Pay her the same as the going rate for an escort? Does anyone have a formula they use? "
You're thinking like one of those neutered suckers that the stripperweb girls love so much. Only in stripperweb nirvana do customers think this way! If you're going to offer her the equivalent that she'd make doing dances at the club (I'm guessing that would come out to $500+), make sure you tuck your genitals back between your legs, and arch your ass out so your hips and balls are as far away from her as possible, to show your low status in the herd.
Ha, not trying to give you shit, just trying to turn you around psychologically on this -- it does not matter one fucking bit what she CLAIMS she'd make in the club at the time, what matters is what it's worth to you and what you'd be willing to pay again.
I almost always pay a flat $200, plus dinner & drinks (although dinner and drinks can end up being $$) etc. Like shadowcat, my OTCs often last many hours, but I love spending time with the girls, so that's a draw for me. I don't know where you live or what going rates for un-neutered clients are there :) :) but I'd guess $300 plus dinner is probably a max you should have in your head.
"Make sure that you negotiate the cost before leaving the dinner table."
I think that's generally the smart advice. That said, a few times when I had good vibes about a girl, I simply let things go ... had dinner, had sex, offered her $200 when it was over. I suppose this could have led to disaster, but so far, I've NEVER had a bad experience. I realized I was taking a risk, and that the girl might not just ask for more but get dramatic, and in all cases I'd already worked out in my head what's the most I would spend ("I'm going to work hard to keep it to $200, I'll go as high as $300 if that's all she needs to stay happy; if she has a meltdown, I'll go as high as $450 and basically just chalk it up as a tax for me being so stupid as to not negotiate up front").
In short, there's something to be said for having sex, then negotiating from the position of strength, in that you've already gotten the sex, she can't take it back, so she knows she's in a terrible negotiating position. That said, you're still taking a risk, and if she gets hysterical, I was always prepared to pay more if I had to.
“… I figure the fact that she's getting a dinner at a nice place is worth something too …”
This comment doesn’t make sense to me personally – it’s like guys at the club that don’t get any dances from the dancers but buy them drinks and they think they are compensating the dancer buy buying them drinks – if they are not making any $$$; IMO they are not being compensated.
Dinner is *your* idea – not hers – I assume you want to have dinner w/ her b/c *you* want to and want her company – so dinner IMO is not compensation for her and IMO you should be compensating her for having dinner w/ you b/c she is spending time with you.
I’ve rarely done OTC and when I’ve done it is just meeting up a notel for 1 hour and I pay her more or less what I’d pay her ITC.
As others have said; I suppose the OTC payment depends in the area and type of club she dances at. $200 or $300 to me sounds fair as that seems to be sorta a going rate in many areas but for certain dancers in certain areas/clubs that may not be enough for her time.
I had the exact same dilemma with my DS. We arranged an Otc date with no discussion of money. We are sitting in the hotel room on the couch discussing what happens next. She has never done this before and has no clue how to proceed. Most of you will probably disagree with my solution. But it worked out great for me with her.
I knew I could get her relatively cheap. I knew she was desperate for money, although at the time I didn't understand quite how desperate until she told me the details several months later. I was undecided what to do until the last second. I was torn as to whether or not I should take advantage of this cute young thing by getting to fuck her cheaply.
Here's what I did. I explained what I wanted us to do. This wasn't hard because we'd already had sex ITC. Then I told her what I would pay her. The number that came out of my mouth was much higher than what I thought she would take, and much more than most of you guys claim to pay. In other words I agreed to pay her a lot more than I had to. She was grateful, said yes, and I've paid her the same amount for sex almost every week since then.
Why did I do this? Well, this woman literally is my perfect 10. I didn't just want to fuck her then. I wanted to fuck her all the time. I can't explain all of the reasons why, but she is the most unique dancer ever. I will never meet another one like her because they don't exist. She is the embodiment of the girl next door fantasy, and I wanted her no matter what it took. I desperately wanted her to want to keep doing this with me, to give me a complete GFE every time, to take trips with me, to not fuck a bunch of other guys, and to want to be with me above all other customers. I knew that she would eventually get lots of guys offering o pay her for sex, but I had my chance to lay claim to her first. I wanted her to want to be with me so much that she'd say no to many of the otyer guys cause she didn't have to, and because she could always make more money with me.
Whether you think my strategy was pathetic or brilliant, I couldn't be happier. We have exactly the relationship I wanted to have with the woman that I want above all others. I never regret what I pay her because she is worth it. Pus we would never have the relationship we have now if I had haggled with her for a low price. She is now a very popular dancer who makes a lot of money ITC, and she would have no reason to keep doing otc with me if not for the fact that I have been so generous with her.
I've never done this with another dancer, and doubt if I ever would. So I'm absolutely not recommending this approach. Unless some day you are lucky enough to meet a woman who could actually be your dream stripper. If you meet her then pay whatever you have to. You will regret it if you don't.
JS, you're in a good position because, no matter what anyone else says, you seem to have gotten what you were looking for. Did you leave some money on the table? Dunno, but what does it matter now, if you're happy? Don't overthink it.
But, for the OP, relative to your comments, I'll say: I've found that it is often NOT that case that how much you pay is directly related to the quality of your experience. I dunno how many times an ATF has passed up bigger spenders than me to just hang out, or quickly rushed through her $500-in-dances customer, to spend the entire afternoon with me, her $200-in-dances customer. The few times I've ended up dating or in fuck-buddy relationships with dancers, they've pursued me, despite me not spending tons of money on them. Being a bigger spender does buy you benefits, but the girls are actually people under all that mabelline.
To put it another way, on a slow shift, after tip-outs and giving the club their portion of each dance, it's not at all uncommon for a girl to take home <$400 for an entire exhausting 8 hour shift of getting groped, insulted by managers and bouncers, talked into doing coke and molly and who knows what else by other dancers, dasncing on guys who smell and who try to stick their fingers in every hole ... Is it any wonder that the idea of spending a couple of hours with you - a guy who presemably smells nice and trests her well -- for dinner and sex, isn't a bad option for $200 (for half as much as she often makes for an entire shift?).
^^^ fuck, cut off..
Not at all cuncoommong for a girl to take home <$400 on a slow shift. That's 8 exhausting hours of dancing on gross guys who smell, fighing off fingers trying enter their pussies, getting hassled by managers and bouncer,but tempted by girls with coke and molly, getting randomly smacked on the ass by guys who don't tip. Given that, is it so weird that she'd be fine making $200 in 2 hours (half as much money in 1/4 the time), with you, a guy who presumably has showered beforehand, treats her well, loves being with her and shows it?
To put it another way, on a slow shift, after tip-outs and giving the club their portion of each dance, it's not at all uncommon for a girl to take home less than $400 for an exhausting 8 hour shift full of smelly guys that try to shove their fingers everywhere, bouncers and managers who disrespect them, temptations to take coke and molly, getting smacked on the ass by random guys. Given $400 for 8 hours of that, is it so weird that she'd take $400 for a couple hours with you -- a guy who presumably showers, treats her well, loves being with her and shows it -- for $200 (half of what she makes on a full shift, in way less time) for a few hours of sex plus dinner and drinks?
Guaranteed money has value. I agree that for most dancers the fancy dinner has limited value. I bet most would rather fuck for an extra half hour and pocket the cash.
Lots of good advice here. It's great there is a place where we can field questions like this. Thanks, everyone. I was thinking $300 top end. Most comments seem to think $200 is good. Probably give her $250. Oh, the area? Houston, TX. if any of you want to add to or change your comments now that you know that.
so you guys mean to tell me that if i were to do this otc thing that $80 plus dinner would not fly? i don't want to give $200 and up. for that type of $$$ she better to my laundry, buy my groceries and get me off 3-4 times.
^^^ remember some of these guys are talking about having their OTC with them for several hours...
In larger cities you have to taken into account travel time as well. For example I hd one former CF that had to travel about 45 minutes each way to see me so even a quick meeting with her would tie her up for 3 hours. She was always broke and appreciative of what ever I gave her so I certainly wanted to make sure she was compensated for her time.
I'd be interested to hear if she agrees to $250. I know that the GFE that I insist upon is a lot more than many of you are looking for, but still $250 for dinner and sex with a gorgeous young woman in a large U.S. city strikes me as dirt cheap.
Ranukam my bud, when u get to Phoenix make sure you find a good RN nurse to date, and I can guarantee you will find those figures. I'll even have you out to my house to prove it, but how would we explain how we met or know each other? (Lol)
They only work 3 shifts a week, too, but like police and fire fighters, they are part of the workforce that truly earns their pay.
21 comments
Latest
In this situation I typically slip $200 into the girls purse when she isn't looking. I also tell her I put something in her purse and I don't think I've ever had a girl question the amount or count it (at least in front of me). When the amount is discussed up front for me I have always paid $100-$300 and that is for girls in the Midwest, Texas and Vegas for the most part. I've had girls throw out much higher numbers which I would have accepted but those girls with ludicrous numbers usually are all talk and no walk anyway.
You're thinking like one of those neutered suckers that the stripperweb girls love so much. Only in stripperweb nirvana do customers think this way! If you're going to offer her the equivalent that she'd make doing dances at the club (I'm guessing that would come out to $500+), make sure you tuck your genitals back between your legs, and arch your ass out so your hips and balls are as far away from her as possible, to show your low status in the herd.
Ha, not trying to give you shit, just trying to turn you around psychologically on this -- it does not matter one fucking bit what she CLAIMS she'd make in the club at the time, what matters is what it's worth to you and what you'd be willing to pay again.
I almost always pay a flat $200, plus dinner & drinks (although dinner and drinks can end up being $$) etc. Like shadowcat, my OTCs often last many hours, but I love spending time with the girls, so that's a draw for me. I don't know where you live or what going rates for un-neutered clients are there :) :) but I'd guess $300 plus dinner is probably a max you should have in your head.
However it goes, you're pretty much screwed. Make sure that you negotiate the cost before leaving the dinner table.
I think that's generally the smart advice. That said, a few times when I had good vibes about a girl, I simply let things go ... had dinner, had sex, offered her $200 when it was over. I suppose this could have led to disaster, but so far, I've NEVER had a bad experience. I realized I was taking a risk, and that the girl might not just ask for more but get dramatic, and in all cases I'd already worked out in my head what's the most I would spend ("I'm going to work hard to keep it to $200, I'll go as high as $300 if that's all she needs to stay happy; if she has a meltdown, I'll go as high as $450 and basically just chalk it up as a tax for me being so stupid as to not negotiate up front").
In short, there's something to be said for having sex, then negotiating from the position of strength, in that you've already gotten the sex, she can't take it back, so she knows she's in a terrible negotiating position. That said, you're still taking a risk, and if she gets hysterical, I was always prepared to pay more if I had to.
This comment doesn’t make sense to me personally – it’s like guys at the club that don’t get any dances from the dancers but buy them drinks and they think they are compensating the dancer buy buying them drinks – if they are not making any $$$; IMO they are not being compensated.
Dinner is *your* idea – not hers – I assume you want to have dinner w/ her b/c *you* want to and want her company – so dinner IMO is not compensation for her and IMO you should be compensating her for having dinner w/ you b/c she is spending time with you.
I’ve rarely done OTC and when I’ve done it is just meeting up a notel for 1 hour and I pay her more or less what I’d pay her ITC.
As others have said; I suppose the OTC payment depends in the area and type of club she dances at. $200 or $300 to me sounds fair as that seems to be sorta a going rate in many areas but for certain dancers in certain areas/clubs that may not be enough for her time.
I knew I could get her relatively cheap. I knew she was desperate for money, although at the time I didn't understand quite how desperate until she told me the details several months later. I was undecided what to do until the last second. I was torn as to whether or not I should take advantage of this cute young thing by getting to fuck her cheaply.
Here's what I did. I explained what I wanted us to do. This wasn't hard because we'd already had sex ITC. Then I told her what I would pay her. The number that came out of my mouth was much higher than what I thought she would take, and much more than most of you guys claim to pay. In other words I agreed to pay her a lot more than I had to. She was grateful, said yes, and I've paid her the same amount for sex almost every week since then.
Why did I do this? Well, this woman literally is my perfect 10. I didn't just want to fuck her then. I wanted to fuck her all the time. I can't explain all of the reasons why, but she is the most unique dancer ever. I will never meet another one like her because they don't exist. She is the embodiment of the girl next door fantasy, and I wanted her no matter what it took. I desperately wanted her to want to keep doing this with me, to give me a complete GFE every time, to take trips with me, to not fuck a bunch of other guys, and to want to be with me above all other customers. I knew that she would eventually get lots of guys offering o pay her for sex, but I had my chance to lay claim to her first. I wanted her to want to be with me so much that she'd say no to many of the otyer guys cause she didn't have to, and because she could always make more money with me.
Whether you think my strategy was pathetic or brilliant, I couldn't be happier. We have exactly the relationship I wanted to have with the woman that I want above all others. I never regret what I pay her because she is worth it. Pus we would never have the relationship we have now if I had haggled with her for a low price. She is now a very popular dancer who makes a lot of money ITC, and she would have no reason to keep doing otc with me if not for the fact that I have been so generous with her.
I've never done this with another dancer, and doubt if I ever would. So I'm absolutely not recommending this approach. Unless some day you are lucky enough to meet a woman who could actually be your dream stripper. If you meet her then pay whatever you have to. You will regret it if you don't.
But, for the OP, relative to your comments, I'll say: I've found that it is often NOT that case that how much you pay is directly related to the quality of your experience. I dunno how many times an ATF has passed up bigger spenders than me to just hang out, or quickly rushed through her $500-in-dances customer, to spend the entire afternoon with me, her $200-in-dances customer. The few times I've ended up dating or in fuck-buddy relationships with dancers, they've pursued me, despite me not spending tons of money on them. Being a bigger spender does buy you benefits, but the girls are actually people under all that mabelline.
To put it another way, on a slow shift, after tip-outs and giving the club their portion of each dance, it's not at all uncommon for a girl to take home <$400 for an entire exhausting 8 hour shift of getting groped, insulted by managers and bouncers, talked into doing coke and molly and who knows what else by other dancers, dasncing on guys who smell and who try to stick their fingers in every hole ... Is it any wonder that the idea of spending a couple of hours with you - a guy who presemably smells nice and trests her well -- for dinner and sex, isn't a bad option for $200 (for half as much as she often makes for an entire shift?).
Not at all cuncoommong for a girl to take home <$400 on a slow shift. That's 8 exhausting hours of dancing on gross guys who smell, fighing off fingers trying enter their pussies, getting hassled by managers and bouncer,but tempted by girls with coke and molly, getting randomly smacked on the ass by guys who don't tip. Given that, is it so weird that she'd be fine making $200 in 2 hours (half as much money in 1/4 the time), with you, a guy who presumably has showered beforehand, treats her well, loves being with her and shows it?
To put it another way, on a slow shift, after tip-outs and giving the club their portion of each dance, it's not at all uncommon for a girl to take home less than $400 for an exhausting 8 hour shift full of smelly guys that try to shove their fingers everywhere, bouncers and managers who disrespect them, temptations to take coke and molly, getting smacked on the ass by random guys. Given $400 for 8 hours of that, is it so weird that she'd take $400 for a couple hours with you -- a guy who presumably showers, treats her well, loves being with her and shows it -- for $200 (half of what she makes on a full shift, in way less time) for a few hours of sex plus dinner and drinks?
In larger cities you have to taken into account travel time as well. For example I hd one former CF that had to travel about 45 minutes each way to see me so even a quick meeting with her would tie her up for 3 hours. She was always broke and appreciative of what ever I gave her so I certainly wanted to make sure she was compensated for her time.
They only work 3 shifts a week, too, but like police and fire fighters, they are part of the workforce that truly earns their pay.