The MILF, after just soaking the bed:
Her: (panting) Christ! It's not enough you have a magic tongue, you gotta have magic fingers too?
Me: Well, you know what they say, when God takes away in one place, he makes up for in another. It's like being blind and having your hearing and sense of smell make up for it.
Her: Oh my fucking God! (laughing so hard she's crying)

