What am I suppose to do in this situation?

avatar for Xeinok
Xeinok
One of my regular dancer always sit down next to me and chat with me for a few min, then when I don't buy a LD from her asap, she always came up with excuse like I have to go to the bathroom, go smoke or go inside dressing room real quick, except that she got up and went over to talk to some other PL instead, and she did it in front of me couple times, still not a big deal except the PL wouldn't even bother tipping her or buy her a LD, and still she sat next to the PL for at least a good 20 or 25 minutes. Now I don't understand the logic behind that. If she calls me her regular, shouldn't she be showing me more attention or at least not disrespecting me like that? Now If I was the one that get up or go over to other dancers instead, she would freak out and giving me shit for no reason....so what's with the double standard? Does she think it is acceptable to disrespect her regular and not worry about hurting my feeling but I am now allowed to do the same?

29 comments

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avatar for Subraman
Subraman
10 years ago
lol
avatar for londonguy
londonguy
10 years ago
Ignore it. She's there to earn money to pay her bills so she's entitled to leave you. The fact she doesn't give the other guy a dance is neither here nor there. Don't take these situations to heart, life's too short to worry what strippers say and do.
avatar for chandler
chandler
10 years ago
"Now If I was the one that get up or go over to other dancers instead, she would freak out and giving me shit for no reason...."

So do it.
avatar for Xeinok
Xeinok
10 years ago
You are right
avatar for mikeya02
mikeya02
10 years ago
Don't be behind that guy at the buffet, He'll eat all the shrimp too.
avatar for crsm27
crsm27
10 years ago
Exactly what londonguy stated.... She is there to make money. So either she is trying to get a hustle on the other guy and thinks she needs to spend some time to get that hustle. OR.... she is trying to get you jealous and have you spend some more $$$ on her. Which might be working a little.

But if she gives you shit for getting dances from another girl. You should tell her... don't get jealous, because I don't when you go make money with another guy. That will get her to stop the double standard....or take you into the LD room and give it all she has got. This has worked for me.
avatar for Xeinok
Xeinok
10 years ago
No chandler I have done that before in another club. My other regular literally cuss me out really loudly in front of other PL and told me that don't ever buy any LD from her ever again.
avatar for 4got2wipe
4got2wipe
10 years ago
I don't know where the shrimp comment came from but it's so off the wall it's just brilliant!
avatar for Diva1975
Diva1975
10 years ago
I feel for you xeinok I'm not sure what your difficulty is but you should never be cursed out by a dancer that is unacceptable
avatar for Xeinok
Xeinok
10 years ago
thank you Diva1975
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
10 years ago
Respect in a strip club? Am I missing some thing?
avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69
10 years ago
You seem to be in the middle of a lot of stripper drama. I think you really must let this sorta stuff go. Strippers will drive you nuts if you try to understand them. I understand the desire to make sense of them, and I understand the desire for them to act the way we think they should, but it ain't gonna happen. It would be just as productive to bang your head against a wall as to keep letting this shit get to you so much.

A really good strategy for you would be to follow the four Fs- Findem, Fingerem, Fuckem, Forgetem. The fourth F is critical.

Also, maybe a change of scenery to some new clubs and new dancers would do you good for a while.
avatar for friction_lover
friction_lover
10 years ago
I wouldn't take it to heart, it's a stripper hustling to avoid traditional work. Her loss and sounds like she wouldn't be fun at that moment anyway.
avatar for JamesSD
JamesSD
10 years ago
Dancers will often sink more time and energy into new faces, fishing for potential new whales. It sounds like that dancer has you pegged as "guy who may or may not buy a couple dances". She's not going to tell you to fuck off, but if you never go VIP, she's also not going to roll out the red carpet.

How many dancers are there at your clubs? Are there enough choices? Should you pursue other hunting grounds? What time of day are you going? Night and day clubbing are very different.
avatar for PhantomGeek
PhantomGeek
10 years ago
Dude, you're taking this stuff personally again. Chill out, okay? It's all business, for both of you. When you start getting into the zen of that, things'll go much more smoothly.
avatar for sailmd
sailmd
10 years ago
Maybe deodorant, mouthwash or a modicum of class is the key for you.
avatar for motorhead
motorhead
10 years ago
"I don't know where the shrimp comment came from..."

I do. You gotta keep up. Yes, it is brilliant.
avatar for GACA
GACA
10 years ago
Life gets soo much better when you realize that nobody gives a flying fuck about your feelings...ahhh the sheer relaxation of not having to give a shot about theirs is total euphoria.

And looking for respect from people who won't even respect themselves. .. you're one of those people so you probably don't get the irony.
avatar for ilbbaicnl
ilbbaicnl
10 years ago
X, let me venture a guess that you also feel like your friends / family / employer take advantage of you. If so, see a counselor.
avatar for deogol
deogol
10 years ago
Truth GACAclub, truth! It is relaxing.
avatar for rockstar666
rockstar666
10 years ago
Xeinoc: Are you a troll? I suspect as much. If you are really a "regular" you are a sure thing for her. That means when she comes over to you, you BUY DANCES! If you don't, you're nothing to her as she obviously is NOT into you otherwise.

The naked truth is she doesn't like you. She doesn't want to chat with you. She'll take your money for dances, but if you play hard to get she'd rather spend time playing the field. IMHO you need to find an actual g/f; you won't find her in a club until you grow up a little, and even then it's not really a worthwhile goal as strippers make terrible g/f's.
avatar for GACA
GACA
10 years ago
I knew a guy like Knock was socially awkward and didn't understand comfort levels between people. Not unlike Lenny from "Of Mice and Men", since there's a sort of lack of empathy there, empathy that is involved in understanding why or how people are most likely to react to certain behaviors. These people end up angry and frustrated and blaming everyone else in the world.
Knock-knock you really should consider weather a Behavioral Therapist can help you improve the quality interactions with strippers, you might have to start slow, like with your actual coworker, grocery store cashier, waitress, but eventually even you might have a more appealing personality to strippers. The thing about a shitty personality is, just like having bad credit, people will charge you more for less and believe they are doing you the favor, and of course with a great personality the absolute opposite is true.
avatar for lopaw
lopaw
10 years ago
I suggest that if you really want dances from her, you do it asap. Either she has ADD, or like rockstar666 said....she just don't dig you.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
10 years ago
You’re trying to treat, and interact w/, these strippers as if you were interacting w/ a civvi – you are using the wrong strategy on the wrong type of woman.
avatar for Diva1975
Diva1975
10 years ago
Brilliant and insightful Papi:)
avatar for rockstar666
rockstar666
10 years ago
I agree with Papi too. My regulars do actually like me, and among all their regulars I know they'd probably pick me over many others...but the deal is that friendship alone doesn't pay the rent, and they are working! They're not hanging out after work like I am; they are AT work. When PL loses that perspective only bad things can follow.
avatar for ilbbaicnl
ilbbaicnl
10 years ago
I disagree Papi, I think X just doesn't get it how hard it is to be a stripper. X seems to think being a stripper is as easy as being a waitress. X probably figures that all custies want more or less the same things from a stripper as he does, so she should know exactly what to expect from him and what he wants.

A woman is attracted to a man for being in his prime, for being above average in some way, for thinking she is special. That is to say, a stripper generally has zero reason to feel attracted to a custy. So they are fighting their own instincts when they are working. I don't know why we think it's easier for them to tolerate us than it would be for us to accept the attentions of a woman we had zero attraction to.
avatar for rockie
rockie
10 years ago
X: Based on your posts here, I'm pretty sure you irritate the shit out the entertainers within 10 minutes,
avatar for shailynn
shailynn
10 years ago
Yo, you need to stop munching on bananas and start on some Prozac or Xanax. That may help you to calm down.
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